


You Are My Chosen Universe

by Layora88



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Accidental Boner, Accidental Voyeurism, Alternate Universe, Anal Fingering, Angst, Artist Steve Rogers, Attempted Rape, Avengers as family, Blow Jobs, Bucky Barnes Lives, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes is Wonderful, Bucky Takes Care of His Stevie, Bucky gets a new metal arm, Bucky’s Metal Arm, Bullies, Childhood Friendship, Confessions, Dirty Talk, Dirty Talking Bucky Barnes, Emotional Sex, Emotional Stevie, Emotional Turmoil, Escape, F/M, Felching, First Meetings, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Howling Commandos - Freeform, Hurried Sex, Hurt Stevie, Hydra, I fudged the timeline, I fudged the timeline and you know, I need to learn to tag, Injured Stevie, Interruptus, It will get better I swear, Kidnapping Captain America, Life-Affirming Sex, Lingerie, Love Confessions, M/M, Manhandling, Masturbation, More Bullies, Not Descriptive Whatsoever, Oral Sex, Pining, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-War, Press Conference, Project Rebirth, Restraints not in the sexy way, SHIELD, Saying Goodbye...for now, Self-Care and not in the dirty sense just making me time xD, Semi-Public Sex, Shopping sprees, Slow Build, Stark Expo, Stevie is not okay, Strike Team, Team Bonding, Team as Family, There is some non consent here though, Timeline? What Timeline?, Tom-boy Stevie Rogers, Tony Being Tony, USO Reels, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Violence, Virgin Stevie Rogers, Virgin bucky barnes, Wartime, bad idea, bucky to the rescue, but she will be I promise, dun dun dun, everything else, light humiliation kink, no actual rape, rape mention, token bad guys, violence sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2020-12-16 14:41:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 167,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21037886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Layora88/pseuds/Layora88
Summary: Stephanie Rogers' first meeting with Bucky Barnes was the start of something she never could have even dreamed of. That first meeting would forever mark the start of their inseparable friendship and this is their journey through it all. Could it turn to something more? Only time will tell.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I will update tags and the rating of the fic as I add more chapters. n_n This is a Pre-War Stucky fic featuring a female Stevie Rogers. I hope you like it, first try at this sort of thing, but uh, it's been in my head for quite some time. <3 Ignore the fact that I've got like...five unfinished stories on the go please, xD.
> 
> Also, the title is taken from a piece of artwork, the very same that actually inspired this piece. I did not draw it and I am unsure as to who did. I came across it some time ago and well, it definitely inspired this fic. <3 Credit for the title and artwork goes to the artist and the artist alone. I wish I knew who they were. <3
> 
> Come chat with me on Discord! starbucksjunkie#9171
> 
> Don't have Discord? Come talk to me on Tumblr! [ko-fiandfanfiction](www.tumblr.com/blog/layora88)

[pre-war stucky featuring fem!steve](https://www.pinterest.ca/pin/560557484858710670/)

Bucky doesn’t know if he is more impressed or worried at this point. Maybe he’s a bit of both. He’s standing there at the edge of the schoolyard, school having just let out not too long ago, with a deep frown creasing his brow, his youthful face still round with what his mother calls _baby fat_. He crossed his arms in front of his slight chest, his grey-blue eyes narrowed as he watched in curiosity as a little blonde girl across the yard seemed to grow that much taller in righteous anger. 

Bucky was absolutely beside himself as he watched the Rogers’ girl practically puff up with indignation as one of the boys in her grade stood less than a foot away, arms crossed in much the same way as Bucky’s and rolled his eyes at her, hard. But of course, this only made the blonde ball of righteous fury puff up even more.

Bucky was sort of amused now, he couldn’t exactly help himself. The boy she was standing in front of was the same age as her, but he was definitely much, much taller and had a good thirty-pounds on her. They were both standing beside a picnic table where a little brunette, Bucky thought her name might be Penelope, was sitting and she’d been sniffling and trying to hide behind her hands as she cried. Mainly because, the boy blondie was so upset with had stolen her apple right from the girls hand and had gone on to taunt her about something or other.

Bucky was too far away to have heard what all the fuss was about exactly, but he hadn’t missed the apple stealing. The Rogers girl suddenly took a threatening step towards the boy when he said something she didn’t care for and Bucky dropped his arms in surprise when the boy she’d been talking smack to glared angrily back at her, uncrossed his arms and took a menacing step towards her just the same.

He wouldn’t hit a girl, though…would he? Bucky wasn’t so sure and wasn’t about to stand by and let it happen. Unfortunately, no sooner had he started across the schoolyard towards them, in hopes of being the older voice of reason and breaking the argument up, did the boy lash out and shove blondie _hard. _She fell back into the dirt, sprawled on her back and Penelope positively _wailed_ at the sight.

“Ah crap,” Bucky muttered, picking up the pace.

He wasn’t far now, but blondie was already shouting colourfully at her attacker and getting to her feet. Bucky got there just as the boy glared and went to shove her again, but she surprised him and kicked him in the groin before he got the chance. He went down like a sack of potatoes, dropping the apple and Bucky was grinning by the time he got there.

Rogers was standing over him glowering and cursing up a storm and if there were any adults around, she was going to surely get a lashing. Her little hands were clenched into fists as she seemed to work herself up in case he attempted to push her again. “Fine-_fine-_“ The boy spat, on his knees with both hands pressed between his legs in an attempt to quell the pain.

Rogers huffed and was momentarily startled when Bucky crept up beside her, hands going up automatically to make a _steady_ gesture, showing her that he wasn’t a threat. She glared at him too, bright blue eyes narrowed in suspicion, hands raising in case she needed to defend herself to him too. Bucky was smiling gently, hoping to reassure her and her shoulders dropped a little when she realized he wasn’t there to beat her up.

“I’ll be taking back Penelope’s apple now, Charlie, and you’d better stop giving her grief,” She warned, voice a little strained and a slight wheeze to her words.

She’d turned her attention back to the boy on the ground once she realized Bucky wasn’t going to do anything. The boy-_Charlie-_was now looking up at them with a few fat tears in his eyes and Bucky shook his head as he watched blondie reach down for the apple he’d dropped when he’d fallen to his knees. Bucky and surely not blondie, expected Charlie to suddenly reach out and grab her wrist just as her hand wrapped around the apple and toss her bodily to the side.

“_Hey!_” Bucky shouted, quickly stepped forward to knock Charlie back himself with a good punch to the cheek.

He howled in surprised pain and went down, Bucky quickly glancing over at the Rogers girl to see if she was alright. She had an uncomfortable grimace on her face, once again sprawled in the dirt, but she wasn’t crying. Tough little thing, Bucky thought, turning his attention back to Charlie. “Listen, pal-“ He scowled, shaking an angry finger at the younger boy. “Didn’t your mother ever teach you it’s not polite to hit a girl?”

The Rogers girl huffed, still sprawled in the dirt about a foot away on her side glaring for all she was worth at the boy who was now clutching at his cheek, tears falling freely as he looked up at Bucky with frightened eyes. “I just wanted a snack!” He attempted to defend and Bucky scowled angrily, snatching up the apple.

“It wasn’t yours, buddy. Don’t go stealing other people’s things if you know what’s good for you again, you get me?” Bucky threatened, still glaring harshly as he rubbed the apple on his shirtsleeve and walked towards Penelope who had stopped crying and was looking to him hopefully.

“Yeah, okay,” Charlie mumbled, frowning as he cast a quick glance between blondie and Bucky. “I won’t do it again.”

Bucky huffed, nodding and muttering under his breath. “Damn right you won’t,” He agreed, leaning over the picnic bench and handing Penelope the apple.

She took it tentatively and clutched it to her chest, giving him the roundest puppy-dog eyes. “T-thank you,” She whispered, cheeks bright with a blush and brown eyes shimmering.

“No problem, but I think you owe your friend more thanks than me,” Bucky admitted, gesturing to where blondie was now sitting up in the dirt, Charlie haven pulled himself to his feet and hobbling away with a pout on his face, hand clutching at his pink cheek.

Blondie was watching Bucky warily but then her bright eyes slipped over to Penelope as the young girl murmured her thanks. Bucky was smiling a little wryly as he approached blondie, Penelope gathering up her things and taking off.

“You okay, sweetheart?” He asked her gently, crouching down next to her, surprised when she turned her scowl on him and pushed at his knees hard.

He sprawled back in the dirt with a bout of startled laughter escaping him as he landed on his butt. “I had him on the ropes,” Blondie defended and Bucky shook his head in disbelief.

“Oh I know you did, darlin’, but I wasn’t about to stand by while a bully hit a girl,” Bucky admitted.

Blondie only scowled harder at this. “I’m not weak because I’m a girl, you know. I could have handled it myself,” She admonished, shifting onto her scraped knees and pushing herself up, ignoring the pain it surely caused her.

Bucky didn’t bother moving from his own sprawled position in the dirt and instead took the moment to look upon the Rogers girl with blatant curiosity. Bucky knew who she was, sort of. He’d seen her at Church a number of times with the girls’ mother and of course in the schoolyard. He knew she was only ten years old, two years younger than him, but she looked so much younger because of her stature. He knew she got sick a lot, had asthma and the like, wasn’t exactly popular either.

She was rather thin, even frail looking with dainty hands and a slim face, big round eyes and a cute nose. She had freckles too, only a couple, a small patch by her left temple which currently had a smear of dirt there and a couple along the tops of her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. Her cheeks were flushed, probably from the fight, her blue eyes bright and expression fierce. Her pink lips were set in an uncomfortable grimace as she got to her feet.

She was wearing a brown dress, her school uniform, complete with black buckled shoes and white stockings…that were definitely no longer white and now sporting some rather unfashionable holes and tears. She huffed as she looked down to inspect the damage and found her knees scraped and bleeding through the thin material.

Bucky was more than surprised she hadn’t started crying yet. Most girls her age would have burst into tears by now and asking for their mommy. “You alright?” He asked, now looking up at her as she attempted to dust herself off, only a little, mind.

She rolled her eyes, turning that fierce expression back on him once again. Bucky tried very hard not to smile at the sight. She was sort of adorable, reminded him of his little sister, though even Becca would have been in tears if she’d gotten pushed around like that. Girl was tough.

“I’m fine,” She snapped, cheeks flushing, maybe with a touch of embarrassment as she stood up a little taller…and then extended her hand out to help him up.

Bucky blinked owlishly up at this little slip of a thing. Her small hand thrust out in front of her, a mess of straw-blonde curls framing her pretty flushed and dirty face. He smiled. “I’m Bucky,” He blurted, still not reaching for her outstretched hand.

She rolled her eyes again, retracting her hand and pushing back some of her unruly curls. “I know, dummy. You’re Rebecca’s older brother.”

Bucky’s smile only grew. “You know who I am?”

She gave him a flat look, looking impatient and annoyed as she crossed her thin arms in front of her chest. “I just told you I did, didn’t I? You got cotton in your ears, pal?”

Bucky spluttered, unable to stop from laughing at the unexpected response. She positively _glowered_ at him. “_Look_, I don’t like bullies, okay? You didn’t need to get mixed up with the likes a him you know. But if you’re going to sit there and laugh at me, I think I’ll be going,” She huffed, marching over to the picnic bench and picking up her book bag.

Bucky watched her incredulously absolutely beside himself as blondie started walking off in a hurry, book bag clutched to her chest and an annoyed scowl on her sweet face. “Hang on a minute-“ Bucky chuckled, hastily getting to his feet and striding after her. “You didn’t tell me your name, darlin’.”

Blondie only scowled harder at that, curls flying out behind her as she continued to walk faster. Bucky was grinning like a fool as he trailed after her, brushing some of the dirt off his pants as he went. “Don’t call me _darlin’_,” She said warningly, looking over her shoulder at him to see if he was still following.

He laughed again, but she just clutched her bag tighter to her chest and kept on. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you. It’s just…you are a _girl_, aintcha?”

Blondie stopped and turned abruptly, starling Bucky into stillness too, lest he bump into her. She was glaring at him hotly. “So what if I’m a girl? It don’t give you any right to call me _sweetheart _or-or _darlin’_, you ain’t my _ma-_“ She blurted.

Bucky blinked, completely _baffled_ by this little girl. He scratched the back of his head in befuddlement. “Uh, right, my bad,” He agreed, sheepish, not really sure what to make of her. “I only wanted a name is all…I know you’re Mrs. Rogers’ daughter.”

Blondie blinked, ruddy cheeks calming slightly as she puffed out a breath. She glanced away to a spot off to his side and Bucky waited hopefully, wondering if she’d give it to him. He was sure he could ask around for it, but he’d rather hear it from her. She shrugged a little. “Stephanie,” She offered quietly.

Bucky beamed at her. “That’s a pretty name,” He agreed, nodding along.

She was looking at him again with a look of disgust on her pretty face. “Sure, whatever. It’s better than _Bucky_.”

Bucky blinked at her in surprise and then promptly burst into riotous laughter, practically doubled over with it. After a minute or so of this, he noticed her foot tapping impatiently against the sidewalk and he straightened up, wiping the few tears that he’d been brought to aside, still grinning like a fool as he looked at her. She looked irritated, but he was sure he could see the hint of a smile threatening her lips and there was a sparkle in her blue eyes that wasn’t there before.

“You done?” She sniped and Bucky grinned, shaking his head.

“As dinner,” He agreed cheerfully, watching as she rolled her eyes, blowing a breath up through her bangs to get them out of her face.

“Good, because I need to get home before my ma leaves for work,” She sighed, turning on her heel and continuing on down the sidewalk.

Bucky started, blinking in confusion before he took off after her. “Hang on-“ He chuckled, catching up to her easy enough, watching as she shot him a curious glance. “Let me walk you home, at least.”

She scowled, brow furrowing in annoyance. “I only live a couple of blocks away. I don’t need no chaperone, Barnes.”

Bucky shook his head. “That sass on you,” He muttered under his breath.

“What?” Rogers huffed, looking to him warily as they continued walking, not having heard him properly.

“Nothin’-“ Bucky covered, hiding a smile as he kept up; for such a small girl, she sure was quick on her feet. “You were pretty brave, fending off that boy, you know.”

She looked to him warily. “Well, he was bullying Penelope and I don’t like bullies.”

Bucky hummed, nodding in agreement. “Same here, pal.”

She seemed to relax a bit more at this, but didn’t slow her pace. They were quiet as they kept on for another minute or too, but Rogers seemed to grow more frustrated as more time passed. “I really can get home just fine, Barnes.”

Bucky hummed, nodding. “I know you can, but I figure I’ll just keep you company for a bit longer is all.”

She frowned at that, but didn’t really know what else to say to him, so she simply kept walking. It wasn’t long before they approached one of the older tenement buildings Bucky recognized. He actually only lived a couple of weeks away, but he wasn’t in an apartment like blondie was. As they got closer, she kept shooting quick glances to the brunet at her side and Bucky pretended not to notice, smiling and humming along under his breath.

They got to the building and Bucky opened the door for her, ignoring her answering scowl as she pushed past him and started up the stairs. They’d barely gotten up to the second floor before she seemed to start to struggle, breath coming in short bursts and an unmistakable wheeze beneath. But when Bucky went to ask if she was alright, she shot him a warning glance, face red and breath still puffing as she held onto the railing and persevered. So Bucky kept quiet.

When they reached the fourth floor, she stopped at the end of the hallway and took a couple of slow breaths, purposely avoiding Bucky’s concerned gaze before she pushed herself off of the wall she’d been leaning against and started down the hallway. Bucky followed.

Blondie huffed as she came to the third door on the right and stopped, turning around to face Bucky. “T-there, I’m home. You can go now.”

Bucky raised a brow. “I’d like to make sure you get inside first, Miss Rogers. It’s only proper.”

She scowled at him deeply, pretty cheeks flushing in a combination of exertion and annoyance as she gave the door a quick rap before pushing it open. “I’m home, ma!” She called, surprised when her mother nearly bumped into her in the doorway.

“Oh, Stevie! I was just coming out to check for you. I thought I’d heard voices,” Mrs. Rogers admitted, kind yet worried smile quickly shifting into surprise at having a guest accompanying her daughter.

“And who’s this?” She asked curiously, gaze sweeping over the slightly older boy.

Bucky was looking at Stephanie, however, and mouthing, _Stevie?_ In curiosity, to which, _Stevie_ rolled her eyes. “Uh, this is Bucky Barnes, ma. He walked me home.”

“Is that so,” Mrs. Rogers breathed, a smile on her much older, kind face. “Winnifred’s son, _James,_ yes, I recognize you, sweetheart.”

Bucky beamed at her, attention quickly shifting. “Yes, ma’am. I just wanted to walk…_Stevie_ here home because she had a bit of trouble…in the…schoolyard?” Bucky was trailing off uncertainly because well…Stevie was grimacing and shaking her head, trying to get him to stop talking.

“What? What trouble?” Mrs. Rogers prompted worriedly, gaze quickly sweeping over Stevie and moaning in exasperation when she caught sight of her ripped stockings and dirtied uniform. “_Oh, Stevie,_ what am I going to do with you?” She sighed, and it was all long-suffering.

Stevie tried not to pout, but she was definitely fighting a pout now. “Sorry, ma. There was a boy being mean to this girl, took her apple-“

“And I’m sure you got it back for her, didn’t you?” Mrs. Rogers sighed, Stevie looking sheepish but determined as she nodded.

“Of course I did, I don’t-“

“Like bullies, I know, honey,” Mrs. Rogers consoled. “I only wish you’d stop ruining all your stockings, they do cost money you know.”

Bucky was smiling. Alright, so this was not a first occurrence, good to know then. “Sorry, ma, I know. If you’d just let me wear _pants_, then I wouldn’t keep ruining-“

“Ohh, yes you would, honey. You’d have permanent holes at your knees all the same,” She sighed, turning her attention back to Bucky, still looking clearly exasperated by her daughter.

“Thank you, James, for walking her home. That was very sweet of you, would you like to stay for dinner? I made some tomato soup,” Mrs. Rogers offered.

“_No-_“ Stevie blurted. “Bucky has to go home, his ma will be worried. He can’t stay-“

Bucky grinned, nodding along. “_Actually,_ I saw a phone down the hall there. Maybe I could use it to call my ma and let her know you invited me for dinner? I’d_ love _to join you.”

“That’s wonderful, James, we’d be happy to have you,” She agreed happily and Bucky tried not to look too smug as Mrs. Rogers took his hand and they headed down the hall to the phone, Stevie looking at him with the biggest scowl on her face Bucky had ever seen on a girl before.

He thought it was probably the sweetest expression he’d ever seen. He wondered what she might look like if she were to smile and knew that he’d do whatever it took to bring it out of her, somehow.


	2. Chapter 2

Stevie didn’t know she’d ever be so lucky when she met James Barnes on that fateful day. He was an ass, sure, but he was _her_ ass. Bucky never left her alone after that, no matter how many times she’d threatened to kick him where it counts if he got in her way again. Bucky would only smile or grin-more often than not-and make sure he was out of reach before he made whatever smart ass remark that had been on the tip of his tongue. He teased her his fair share, but it was never hurtful, just poking fun of all the quirks he secretly liked about her. It wasn’t a really big secret by any means. She knew he cared about her, just as she cared about him. They were best friends and when you’re best friends, you love and hate each other in equal measure, including all the others silly quirks. Because it was what made them, them. It was as simple as that.

Her smart mouth was definitely one of those things Bucky loved about her, her attitude got her into trouble at the best of times and usually with kids twice her age, weight and height; not that Bucky’s smart mouth was any better when exercised. It was sort of ridiculous, but Bucky admired her all the more for it, even when it dragged him into the mess she’d started. He finished more fights than he’d ever have the brains to start himself over the years they’d befriended each other and though it may have been a sort of begrudging friendship at first-on Stevie’s side of course-they wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Now, Bucky is twenty-three and Stevie twenty-one and they’ve…well, they’ve been through a lot the last few years together. In the beginning, things were easy. Sort of. They were just two kids growing up in Brooklyn under their families comforting arms. Bucky at the Barnes household with his sisters, ma and pa, Stevie fast becoming a regular fixture over there since the beginning, Winnifred and Mrs. Rogers making fast friends once they’d realized their kids were quickly becoming inseparable. His whole family loved Stevie, treated her like she was a child of their own.

The Rogers family was a small one…with only Mrs. Rogers, _Sarah_ and her daughter Stevie. Stevie’s father had passed a couple of years after the First World War. He’d come back…changed, but Sarah thought he’d been doing better but sadly, he took his own life shortly after Stevie was born. Unable to go on. Sarah’s only consolation to her daughter was that he’d once held her as a babe and treated them both like the precious gold he always thought they were. They had meant the world to him, she knew, but sometimes love wasn’t strong enough to keep a person there, present and thriving. Stevie did her best to understand.

Sarah had made sure to talk about Stevie’s father while her daughter was growing up and hoped that it helped, to know that he would have been proud of his daughter and wife for living and fighting the hardest they could. Though Bucky and Stevie’s friendship was easy, Stevie’s life was far from it.

From an early age she had been diagnosed with ailment after ailment, illness on top of illness. From colour blindness to partial deafness in her left ear, asthma, scoliosis, a terribly weak immune system that left her open to chronic colds, rheumatic fever, scarlet fever, sinusitis and on top of all that, she had high blood pressure, heart arrhythmia, stomach ulcers and pernicious anemia…to name a few.

It took its toll not only on Stevie, but her mother and Bucky as well. Growing up with a chronically ill best friend was tough, always worrying about her when the weather started to turn, even just going for a walk on a damp day was a risk, one Bucky wouldn’t take if he could help it. Worrying and fussing over her became second nature to Bucky and Sarah was more than grateful to have the extra help.

So, their friendship may have been easy, but Stevie’s life was not and unfortunately, it only got that much harder when Sarah Rogers fell ill and was diagnosed with Tuberculosis. It didn’t take long for the disease to run its course and Stevie lost her mother in the fall of her 18th year. It was taken as well as could have been expected, which was, obviously not well. Stevie’s health deteriorated for a while quickly following her mother’s death and Bucky was forced to step in and move in with her to help in any way he could.

She pulled through though, and Bucky would never in his life forget how scary that winter had been. Because it was the winter he almost lost his best friend to fever. But, she pulled through. A real fighter that one and Bucky was grateful…selfish too, because he didn’t think he could live without her in his life. If he lost her…he wasn’t sure what he’d do. Thankfully, he didn’t have to find out then and hoped he never would.

He’d moved out in the late spring of Stevie’s 19th year, she having insisted she could find a smaller place for just her to save on money and Bucky could go back home and help out his parents. Bucky had tried to convince her otherwise, but she wasn’t having it. She insisted on having her own shoebox to live in, to call her own. She wanted to support herself and well, Bucky got it…but that didn’t mean he liked it. Stevie living on her own was dangerous. What if she got sick? Who would take care of her? Who would make her soup or stew and make sure she looked after herself?

Bucky would always get this look on his face when he thought about it and Stevie could very well read him like a book at this point so she always made a point to go up to him and flick his forehead and tell him to _stop straining yourself, Buck, you’ll hurt yourself doin’ all that thinkin’ _and Bucky would roll his eyes and give her a shove.

He eventually did find a way to help, but that stayed between Stevie’s landlady and Bucky, blondie didn’t need to know about it, so there. At least she didn’t have to move to another building, though they’d moved her to a much smaller apartment on the first floor.

Bucky worked down at the docks during the week and picked up overtime on the weekends when he could, even helped with odd jobs around the apartment complex Stevie lived in to help out when he could. Stevie did her best with her art commissions and worked part-time down at the grocers tidying up, but Bucky didn’t much care for that job; because more often than not, having her sweeping and cleaning stirred up dust, dirt and dander and then on top of that, the harsh chemicals she used to clean would always aggravate her asthma and have her in a coughing fit if she wasn’t careful.

But Stevie’s art was doing well, she’d always been talented that way. Always clutching a pencil or piece of charcoal in her hand and drawing whatever she so pleased. She especially loved to draw Bucky and her mother and Bucky had long ago given up on ever telling her to find something prettier than his ugly mug.

She’d been drawing some advertisements for local shops and specialty adverts for events in the city the last year or so. She’d tried her hand at a couple of comics too and they’d gone rather well. She was doing alright for herself but they both knew that at any moment that could change with a cold or a flu or _something_ that’d have her out of commission for a week or more. They both had their own emergency funds for that sort of thing to cover medicine and any doctors visits, but Bucky would have to fight tooth and nail to get her to accept any kind of help, financial or otherwise from him.

It was all par for the course though. He would always be Stevie’s friend, even when she was shouting at him for slipping a couple extra dollars into her secret stash tucked away in the kitchen or maybe an extra bun or two in the bread box or a fresh couple of apples or danishes from the grocer left out on her counter for her to enjoy. She always put up an initial fight, but more often that not, she’d push the fight aside after a while and simply pretend it hadn’t happened, even if she never once forgot that it did.

Growing up with Stevie wasn’t what Bucky initially thought it might be like when he befriended the girl he’d met in the schoolyard. He thought it’d be like having an annoying sister, maybe, but when they’d first met, although he thought she reminded him a bit of his younger sister, Becca, Stevie was anything but. She wasn’t your typical girl and maybe that’s _why_ Bucky felt drawn to her that fateful day in the schoolyard.

She fought bullies of all shapes and sizes. Never let anyone talk down to her or treat her as anything less than a person. She stood up for everyone she thought deserved it and fought for her beliefs with everything she had. She never cried when she got hurt either, which was sadly rather often. Though Bucky knew when she was hurting and did his best not to smother her with attention or she’d just turn that righteous fury on him instead. She’d rarely shed a tear for an injury, in fact, it wasn’t until she’d lost her ma that Bucky had ever seen her cry and he never wanted to see her do it again so long as he lived.

But not only was she not your typical girly girl, she seemed to go out of her way to look more boyish as time passed. Bucky hadn’t really thought it was possible, _but there it was_. She was constantly dirtying up her stockings, tearing her dresses and just generally getting covered in dirt, usually as a result of a fight she’d picked that day, standing up to the next big bad bully she didn’t have a hope in hell of coming out of unscathed. Didn’t seem to bother her one bit because _she just kept_ _doing it. _He was generally concerned with the state of his poor hair, if he kept tugging at it he was surely going to be bald before he hit 25!

Bucky would say it annoyed him, but only outwardly. He was more than harbouring adoration for her fierce spirit, her righteous anger and quick wit, even if it got her into right trouble. Not that he’d ever tell her, of course, lest he want that side of her directed at him.

Sarah Rogers had given up not much longer after Bucky had met them and started letting her go to school in trousers, _trousers!_ It was not something girls dressed in, nor did most girls attempt to braid their hair back and don a cap to hide their long curly lengths whenever possible. Given her stature, her state of dress and her overall mannerisms, Bucky started to forget she’d ever really been a girl in the first place, but only kind of.

He still teased her about her potty-mouth, telling her _good girls don’t talk like that, pretty_ and get a punch to the shoulder for his troubles. If they were both grinning like fools when the exchange happened, neither commented. It was just sort of a thing. Stevie never denied that she was a girl, didn’t seem to want to, nor did she want to seem like a boy either. She just…didn’t like dressing all girly, Bucky guessed. She’d always been a bit of a tom-boy from what Sarah told him and Bucky had seen that from the beginning too.

So while Bucky didn’t exactly forget that she was a girl, he more or less just thought of her as Stevie, his equal; boy or girl, it really didn’t matter to him, nor should it matter to anyone else. When they were out and about together, they joked and stood close, Bucky’s arm a permanent fixture around her bony shoulders. They pushed and shoved and threw good natured insults at one another and generally looked like just two guys out having fun. If her voice was a little softer, features and figure a little slimmer than that of a boy’s, _well,_ what did it matter?

Bucky sometimes wondered what people thought of when they looked at them like that. Stevie was small, smaller than most actually. She had long slender fingers, usually covered in bandages-_hell _she usually had more than three on her at any given moment-sharp shoulders, bony knees and elbows, barely stood 5 foot next to his 6 and a bit. Her face was angled and thin, jaw sharp with only a hint of fat, never really able to hold on to much weight no matter what she ate. She had long curly hair too, a lovely pale straw-blonde that Bucky marvelled at sometimes. He didn’t get to see it all that much anymore as she tended to keep it braided or pinned up under a hat. Back in the private of her apartment she’d let it down sometimes after a shower and before bed, but Bucky rarely saw it in all its curly glory anymore.

He remembered asking her once, why she didn’t just cut it short while they were sitting on the sofa together one afternoon in the quiet of her apartment, where they’d been all day. Bucky had been reading a new book he’d got for his birthday and was soon distracted by the noise of Stevie’s pencil _scritch-scratching_ across the sketchbook in her lap, a sound which was so normal to him it was borderline disgusting at this point. She’d stopped drawing at the random question and shrugged one delicate shoulder without looking up at him and replied, _ma liked my hair long…she had hair just like it, you remember_ and Bucky had swallowed past the lump in his throat, because yeah, yeah he did.

Sarah had always had beautiful blonde hair, though it was darker than her daughter’s and sprinkled with grey and usually tied back neatly when she’d had to go to work at the hospital. Stevie had always let Sarah brush her hair and sometimes Stevie would brush her ma’s hair too. She said she liked it when her ma played with her hair, was relaxing, comforting and he wondered if Sarah felt the same. He was pretty sure she had.

He didn’t say anything for a while, going back to his book instead. Later, when he’d looked over from his book when he’d caught slight movement out of the corner of his eye, he noticed that she’d been twirling a piece of her curly hair around her fingertip over and over again while she drew and knew that if she could help it, she’d never cut it off. Bucky had taken that moment to say quietly, _I like your hair down. It’s very…pretty, all curly like that._ Bucky had inwardly and maybe a touch outwardly grimaced. Calling Stevie pretty on any given day was probably at least going to prompt a smack and at worst, was going to start a fight but blessedly it wasn’t one of those days.

Stevie’s lips had suddenly quirked and Bucky knew he was doomed as a moment later she pursed her lips and batted her lashes at him all dramatic like, bright blue eyes twinkling in amusement. _Aww_, _well aren’t you a sweetheart_, she’d said cheerfully and then winked…they both lasted all of three-seconds before they burst out laughing, Stevie shoving a foot at Bucky’s leg in a half-hearted kick. Bucky let her and a moment later when she shoved her cold socked toes under his thigh, he shifted to let them squirm under a bit more to warm them. If they both wore matching smiles on their faces while they returned to their tasks, what did it matter?

.

And then the War came and with it, all of Bucky’s troubles. Argument after argument with Bucky’s family, his ma, pa, even his sister. However, it was the arguments with Stevie that were by far the worst. Bucky knew he’d be called on…even if he didn’t go down and enlist himself, which he was going to. He had told his parents he would, told his sisters too. They’d cried, of course they had. What person wouldn’t cry when they were told their son would be going off to fight a war soon?

When he’d finally told Stevie he’d enlisted, not daring to give her much notice beforehand, lest she really lose it, she’d…Bucky hates to recall that conversation, if it could even be called that. She’d yelled, _screamed_ even, angry, frustrated tears shining in her eyes as she told him over and over that it _wasn’t fair, why can’t _**_I _**_go too? I want to help, why can’t I help? Why won’t they _**_let me_**_, because I’m a _**_woman_**_, Bucky, it’s because I’m a _**_woman!_** And Bucky had stood there, hands clasped in front of him, his own eyes glimmering with tears he refused to shed.

He’d never been so thankful that Stevie was a woman in his entire life and he knew, absolutely _knew_ he could never, _ever_ tell her that. No matter what. Because _that?_ That might be what would tear them apart for good. If the war didn’t do it first, mind.

For her part, Stevie had started working on war bond propaganda that would be displayed in shops, at recruitment centres too. She’d been working on all kinds of adverts for the war effort and Bucky told her over and over again that she was helping and that should be enough. It wasn’t, he wasn’t stupid enough to believe that, but he sincerely hoped she’d stop trying to get to the front-lines at the very least.

She’d been caught hanging around the recruitment centres, hoping to, hoping to do what exactly, Bucky didn’t know. Didn’t mean she stopped doing it. Bucky worried about her, about the fascination she had with getting to the front, about doing her part and _helping_. _Christ,_ Bucky knew if she could get to the front lines she’d be a force to be reckoned with, the only problem-_well, _one of them-was that her poor body would stop her from ever getting there, that and the fact that she was a woman.

Before the argument, Bucky had asked for one thing, in hindsight, he should have asked for two. The first had been a favour.

“You know, you’ve had a lot of stupid requests, but this is probably the stupidest,” Stevie sighed, arms folded across her frail chest as she looked down her slightly crooked nose at her best friend.

“That’s not true,” Bucky said absently, on his knees and rifling through the bathroom cupboard for something or other.

Stevie rolled her eyes, sighing again and tapping her foot impatiently as she crowded Bucky in the bathroom doorway. Bucky ignored her for the time being, finally giving a cry of victory as he pulled out a vanity mirror he’d seen hiding in the cupboard ages ago. It was something that belonged to Sarah, but Stevie had never had much use for it so she’d tucked it away.

“Here,” Bucky announced, standing up and spinning around to face his friend in the tiny space. “You can use this, you know, to make sure you get it right.”

Stevie rolled her eyes but took the preferred item before turning on her heel and exiting the bathroom. “Why on earth do you want a portrait of me, Barnes?” She sighed, flopping down at the kitchen table where she’d left her sketchbook and charcoals open and waiting.

Bucky shrugged, leaning against the only other chair at the opposite end of the little table to face his friend as she made herself comfortable, well, as comfortable as she could be in a wooden chair. At least it helped her sit up straight, if she’d been on the couch she probably would have instantly curled in on herself once she started to draw.

“I just want a picture of my best girl is all,” He grinned, teeth flashing and eyes sparkling as he said it, hoping for a reaction.

He was stupid to think that he wouldn’t have gotten one after that. “You’re a real jerk, Barnes,” She muttered, but she was smiling even as she shook her head and set up the little vanity mirror so she could see herself better and started pulling her hair down from it’s braid; knowing Bucky liked to see her hair all in its curly glory.

“Best girl-“ She scoffed, shaking her head and loosening the curls even more. “Alright, _Casanova,_” She teased, eyes rolling as she glanced over to him. “I’ll make you a portrait, but you’re buying me whiskey when we go to the bar later.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “What a hardship,” He feigned, _tsking_ at her. “What with a lightweight like you, I’ll only have to buy on-“

He barely managed to dodge the book she’d had at her elbow; one of his, actually. He laughed and so did she, both growing quiet as they looked to one another. Stevie still looked curious, a little unsure about the request and Bucky knew she was going to ask him again, why he wanted it and he knew he’d have to tell her. He couldn’t lie to her, never could and never would.

“Why _do_ you need this portrait, Bucky?” She asked him, knowing she wouldn’t have to ask him not to lie to her.

Her voice was a quiet murmur, blue eyes careful, questioning and unsure. Bucky swallowed past the uncomfortable tightness in his throat, letting himself just memorize her features for a long moment. He knew it might be one of the last times he’d see peace in her expression, quiet…without being marred with guilt or shame or…he blew out a slow breath and unbuttoned his jacket, reaching in to his breast pocket for his letter.

Her blue eyes tracked the movement and when he carefully set the papers down on the kitchen table within her sight, still in their envelope with the U.S. Army stamp damning all on its own in the top right corner…he didn’t have to say any more. He’d watched in silence as she’d broken the piece of charcoal she’d been holding, plain in two, angry splotches of colour rising to her cheeks, eyes usually such a serene blue, like a still lake, were soon burning in their sudden intensity…

That’s when the yelling had started and Bucky wished that the second thing he’d asked of her, was not to get angry. It’s not like she was angry with _him._ Bucky wasn’t fool enough to think that she was. But it still hurt, to be the cause for it all anyway.

The argument had been terrible and Bucky is still thinking about it three days later when he’s coming out of the recruitment offices now dressed in his new army dress uniform complete with officers hat, dark green tie and fancy brass buttons. He was _done up to the nines_ as his ma would say and he shook his head fondly as he headed for Stevie’s place. He’d see his parents and sisters in the morning, before he was to head out, right now, he and Stevie had plans to meet up and head out for a bite to eat before the Stark Expo.

He’d managed to get them tickets and knew that this was the perfect way for them to say good bye…even if Stevie wouldn’t say it was so. Bucky didn’t exactly think there was a perfect way to say goodbye either, but he’d take it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have one more chapter nearly completed after this one, so I should hopefully have it uploaded either tonight or tomorrow. More than likely it'll be tomorrow as I'm trying to find the right place to end the chapter. <3 Hope you like it so far. I'll continue to update tags and rating as I see fit.


	3. Chapter 3

Stevie had busied herself this morning with dropping off another finished commission and collecting her earnings and on her way home. She’d even stopped off at her favourite art store to browse around. As it was just after lunch, she had some time before she was supposed to meet up with Bucky and she did need some new charcoals so she figured the visit was worth her time.

Of course that meant she was in the store for nearly an hour just _looking_ at everything she couldn’t exactly afford. Still, a girl could dream. She smiled at the thought as Mr. Hatfield rang up her small purchase of five charcoal pencils enclosed in a little metal tin he’d thought she might like, _no charge of course, not for my favourite regular._ She’d thanked him, knowing it would mean she could carry them safely in her book bag without risk of breaking them like she was wont to do.

She’d eyed the rows of pretty sketchbooks as she’d headed to the door, all their perfect spines and leather bound covers neat and all lined up so nicely. She inwardly sighed, reaching up to pull down her hat to protect against the light cold as she shifted her book bag to sit better on her shoulder.

She’d managed to walk a couple of blocks, no more than ten-minutes from her apartment, when she’d suddenly tripped on the sidewalk. Over what, she couldn’t be sure, probably just her own two feet but regardless, she went down like a sack of bricks, skinning her palms as she braced her fall. Most of her knuckles were already bandaged from a fight from last week and the last thing she needed was _more _bandages over her palms and generally making things more difficult. She grimaced, hoping it wasn’t nearly so bad. She could hear laughing off to her right but she ignored it, instead focusing on the contents that had spilled from her book bag at her sudden fall.

Her-what was now completely full-sketchbook was lying open on the sidewalk displaying a picture she’d drawn of Bucky a few weeks ago. He’d been sleeping on her sofa after dinner one night in just his trousers and button-up, jacket and shoes left by the door, hair artfully mussed and face slack with sleep as he’d dozed. It was one of her favourite pictures of him, mind…most of the pictures she drew of Bucky were her favourite though, so…

The laughter from a moment ago made a reappearance, much closer now too and she looked up from where she’d been kneeling on the pavement, pushing a figure studies book from the library into her bag along with her charcoals, to find a big burly guy standing over her open sketchbook positively _sneering_ down at it.

“You an artist or somethin’? Maybe a _faggot _artist?” Burly Guy challenged.

Stevie blinked, rather caught off guard…_why would…_she heard more laughter beside her and she glanced over to see another man, this one with a definitively crooked nose and a big gap between his front-teeth looking down at her in disgust.

“Answer me, _you faggot-_“ Burly Guy snapped and Gap Tooth suddenly shoved at her right shoulder with his shoe, pushing her down into the pavement.

She yelped a bit at the sudden burst of pain, but quickly scrambled forward to grab her sketchbook before they got any bright ideas to step on it or worse. She didn’t get the chance though, Burly Guy suddenly grabbing her outstretched arm and yanking her to her feet.

“_Hey!_” She shouted, stumbling a step or two before Burly Guy shoved her into Gap Tooth. “I think there’s been a misunder-“

She barely got the words out before Gap Tooth was grabbing her upper arms to keep her still and knocked her hat off in the process. She watched in angry frustration as Burly Guy finally got a proper look at her and then laughed in her face, breath sour, _foul_ and she cringed away from the awful smell.

“Lookit’, it’s a _girl_,” He blurted and she could hear Gap Tooth’s happy laughter even in her bad ear.

“_Listen, assholes-_“ She snapped. “Let me go or I’ll-“

“You’ll _what?_” Burly Guy challenged, sneering at her angrily as he took a step forward into her space.

Stevie stumbled back, attempted to anyway and decided she really didn’t care for being led down an alleyway and lashed out, kicking back at Gap Tooth’s shin as hard as she could manage. He let out a terrible yowl and she jumped into action, wrenching herself out of his momentarily lax grasp, but Burly Guy was faster. He grabbed her fisted hands and yanked them down and together, forcing her to the ground. She yelped at the pain in her wrists and then Gap Tooth was standing over her, kicking her in the ribs for her troubles.

She grunted at the sudden sting and tried to breathe through the pain, Burly Guy directing his buddy to grab her wrists for him. She could feel the bones in her wrists _grinding_ together as he did and a moment later they were dragging her back further into the alleyway. She fought them every step of the way spewing every curse in the book at them and it wasn’t until Gap Tooth relinquished his grip on her wrists with one hand to sock her in the cheek, that she really went down and yeah okay, she might actually be in a bit of trouble here.

She kicked out behind her as Burly Guy shoved her head down into the pavement and she could feel the spot on her cheek he’d hit scraping against the dirty ground and _ugh_, not good. Gap Tooth grabbed her elbows and pinned her arms down as best he could. It really didn’t take much, she was lucky if she weighed ninety pounds on a good day, she really was rather tiny. Burly Guy was laughing again, calling her _feisty _and telling her how much he liked that as he delivered yet another punch to the same side Gap Tooth had kicked a minute ago and she groaned as she attempted to curl up and avoid the spreading pain.

She was on her knees and she desperately tried to kick back at her attacker, but she was feeling winded and her movements were a bit sluggish and Burly Guy was much bigger than her. He knelt down on her calves then, forcing her legs into the dirty ground and making Stevie suddenly tense up; because the guys was pressing against her backside _very _uncomfortably. _No, no they wouldn’t-_her mind raged, cheeks flushing with anger as she started struggling just that much harder.

“Let me go!” She shouted, her voice hoarse and choked from all her yelling and there was a wheeze beneath it all too-_great_-but they weren’t listening to her; Burly Guy suddenly tugging at her suspenders as he shoved her jacket up.

He managed to unclasp one of her suspenders and then rucked up her cream button-down to expose her skin. She twisted, cursing and spitting at him, panic rising in her throat as he suddenly let his palm come down in a hard smack against her bottom, swearing at her to _shut up already, damn it!_ Her cheeks positively _flamed_ at the degrading treatment, anger and absolute _vitriol_ spewing from her mouth as she called him every possible dirty word she could think of while _still_ fighting Gap Tooth’s painful grip around her wrists. Her attacker tugged impatiently at where her belt was cinched ridiculously tight at her waist and she was never more thankful to have put three additional holes into the worn leather so that it fit her properly.

She was unprepared for Gap Tooth to suddenly yelp in surprised pain when a fist connected with his jaw, however. He went tumbling in the opposite direction, landing in a heap against the alley wall, clutching his face and whimpering in pain. Stevie didn’t have much time to figure out what had happened exactly, before Burly Guy was shouting and letting her go, but before he could get to his feet, Stevie heard a muffled curse and then Burly Guy was grunting in pain as someone got a good hit in.

Stevie scrambled to her feet, unsteady and off balance as she grabbed the nearest thing she could reach in case she needed to defend herself._ A garbage can lid,_ _great_, she thought whilst brandishing it as she turned to face Burly Guy and found him pinned up with a hand on his throat, face read, by…_Bucky_, of all-

She really shouldn’t have been all that surprised. She wondered if her friend had the nose of a blood-hound or something or some kind of weird homing beacon on her. Lord knows he always seemed to find her when she was in one kind of trouble or another.

Burly Guy coughed and spluttered when Bucky’s grip tightened and Stevie glared when his wounded gaze snapped back to her. “You’re not worth it you stupid cun-“ He started to spit, blood dripping from his lips and before Bucky could deliver another blow, Stevie beat him to it; smacking the guy in the temple with the side of the garbage can lid.

Bucky backed up as the blow was delivered, dropping the guy instantly. He fell hard against the wall with a groan of pain as they both stepped back to watch as Gap Tooth whimpered and scrambled a bit. “I ever see you two again, I’ll finish what I started, you hear?” Bucky threatened, voice cold as ice and low, positively_ seething _with barely contained rage.

Gap Tooth was nodding before Bucky had even finished speaking, making a grab at his friend as he attempted to haul him to his feet and get the hell out of there. Once they’d scrambled out of sight, Stevie let out a heavy breath, that light wheeze still very much present as he set the garbage can lid back where she found it and leant back against the alley wall.

“Had em’ on the ropes,” She sighed, wiping the corner of her mouth where she found a little trickle of blood.

He’d managed to split her lip and she rolled her eyes, a light chuckle escaping her as she tipped her head back against the bricks, eyes closing as she just _breathed _for a second or three. Unbeknownst to her, Bucky was staring at her in a mix of horror, anger and awe but when he said nothing and just continued to stare at her, Stevie cracked one blue eye open to look at her friend. Just as she caught the look on his handsome face, she also caught sight of his dress uniform for the first time, lips starting to part to say well, _something. _She didn’t exactly get the chance, still apparently stuck gawking at her friend all done up in his army dress.

“Of course you did, pal,” He muttered angrily and Stevie startled at his harsh tone.

“Yeah…” She said slowly, brows furrowing in frustrated confusion; she did have it handled, didn’t she? “What’re you so angry for-“

She started to ask but Bucky didn’t let her finish. “Jesus Christ, _Stevie!_” He hissed, shoving the sketchbook she’d dropped and her book bag at her, trying not to look her over for more injuries so he could speak to her properly, but knowing that he would be doing it sooner rather than later anyway.

She blinked at him dumbly and Bucky watched as her cheeks started flushing in her rising anger. “You could have been seriously in trouble, don’t you get it, Stevie?” He snapped, shaking his head and Stevie was suddenly very much distracted by the picture Bucky made then…all dressed up in his uniform, clean and pressed, his cap sitting primly atop his dark head of hair.

Stevie’s bandaged fingers curled around the sketchbook and bag as he shoved it to her chest absently as Bucky let go and took a flustered step back. “You can’t be startin’ fights like this, Stevie. You could’ve…they coulda’ really hurt you,” He stated plainly, still shaking his head looking harried and upset…_worried._

Stevie felt a little guilty at that, but only a little. “_I_ didn’t start anything, Buck,” She explained, huffing in annoyance. “I tripped and fell, my book fell open…they took me for a boy, thought I was a…fairy, _queer_,” She sighed, rubbing her eyes. “They saw a picture of you I drew and thought I was, well-_whatever_-but then they realized I was a girl.”

She shrugged a bit, gaze slipping away from Bucky to look at a spot over his shoulder so that she didn’t have to see the look in his eyes. Bucky didn’t say anything for a moment and instead took a deep breath, letting it out shakily. “If you’re not lookin’ for trouble it sure as shit has a tendency to find you, ya’ know,” He admitted, letting out another one of those gusty sighs.

Stevie couldn’t help grinning wryly at that. He wasn’t exactly wrong. “Yeah, well,” She huffed, absently putting her bag over her shoulder and wincing as the movement pulled on her sore ribs.

Bucky sighed, shaking his head as he took a step towards her. “How bad is it?”

She shrugged, regretting the movement instantly when it pulled at her ribs again and her right shoulder where Gap Tooth had knocked her down. “They got in a couple a’ lucky punches is all,” She mumbled, tucking her sketchbook away.

Bucky rolled his eyes and took her bag from her when she fumbled with the flap, noting the palms of her hands looked a bit scuffed up, on to of her already cut up knuckles from the last run in with a bully. He tried not to sigh too heavily as he closed the flap and did up the clasp himself, slipping the bag over his own shoulder and turning his attention back to blondie as she brushed some of the dirt off her blouse. She didn’t bother with her unclasped suspender right then as she tugged her jacket down properly, wiping at the corner of her mouth again when she felt more of that trickling blood on her lip.

“You’re bleeding,” Bucky murmured, almost absently as he reached out to her cheek instead of her lips, where she’d wiped blood from her split lip into the broken skin of her cheek by accident.

Stevie didn’t startle exactly, but it was a near thing. She turned big blue eyes up at him and felt rather than saw when his knuckles gently brushed the apple of her cheek…and came away wet with a smear of dark blood. She flushed a bit, annoyed that they’d gotten that much out of her. Her lip stung, sure, but now that she thought about it, her cheek was practically burning from that punch. Was probably worse than she realized too and she was mad that only a _punch_ had done that.

She huffed, adjusting her shirt as she buttoned her jacket and when she took a few steps towards the mouth of the alley, she was startled when Bucky grasped her upper arm lightly to stop her. She turned, a question on her lips, maybe a smart remark too if she was being honest, but the would-be question was answered when Bucky simply settled her fallen hat atop her pinned up hair. She muttered her thanks and shot him a gracious once over, hoping to steer the topic elsewhere as fast as possible.

“I see you’ve picked up your uniform. I bet you had all the dames swooning all over the place on your way over,” She teased, elbowing Bucky’s side.

Bucky grunted, her elbows were sharp, damn it. He rolled his eyes, draping his arm carefully around her shoulders as he tugged her in a bit closer. “Yeah, trippin’ all over themselves like regular _dogs-_“

Stevie laughed, shoving at his side playfully before letting him tug her back in place, right where he thought she belonged. “That’s not nice, Buck,” She admonished gently, falling into step with him. “Bet they’d love to see a handsome soldier off to war, spend the night remindin’ you of all you’d be missin’,” She chuckled, a teasing lilt to her voice as she fell into step easily with him.

Bucky rolled his eyes, shrugging as he tipped his head to a couple of ladies across the street who they’d both noticed were murmuring and gesturing while hiding behind their gloved hands as they laughed and smiled, waving at Bucky. Stevie rolled her eyes and snickered under her breath, taking pleasure when Bucky’s cheeks started to darken at the attention.

“Eh, not really interested in any of the dames that are fixin’ to spend time with a soldier just now, Stevie. They look like sharks more than anythin’ to me, gettin’ hitched and the like, maybe cheatin’ on their sweethearts when they get lonely while the boys are fightin’ for their lives at the front.”

Stevie swallowed hard, casting a glance up through her lashes at her best friend. “Don’t think the worst, Buck. Dames always noticed you, even before you put on that snazzy uniform.”

Bucky hummed, it was true. Not that he ever gave them the time of day and even if he did, little bit of flirting, dancing and a couple of drinks was just about the extent of it. Always walked them home with a kind word and a respectable kiss on their cheeks, that’s it. He’d only ever gone further with a girl _once_ and it’d been a mistake, besides he wasn’t really interested in that sort of thing after that one time, hadn’t been for a while now. “_So_…you think it’s snazzy?”

Stevie rolled her eyes, shoving away from him, this time managing to escape out from beneath his arm. Bucky chuckled, smiling sweetly as he followed her. She was walking a little stiffly and he sighed, knowing he’d have to ask to check out her injuries once they got home and see if she needed stitches or a trip to the doctors or worse, the hospital.

“Shut up, jerk. Come on, I need to wash my hands,” She sighed, glancing down at her scraped and dirtied palms as they approached her building, hoping they simply looked worse than they actually were.

Bucky followed dutifully up the back steps of the building, watching as she stopped briefly to grab the spare key from underneath the one random brick outside the place. Bucky didn’t bother to withhold his eye roll at that and followed her into the first apartment, grateful she was no longer on the fourth floor anymore. They got inside soon enough, kicking off their shoes and Stevie went straight to the bathroom, Bucky setting down her book bag on the kitchen table as his gaze swept around the place.

Nothing had changed since he’d last been here and he soon bypassed the living room and kitchen and headed towards her bedroom and in turn the bathroom beyond. He stopped in the bedroom, glancing down at Stevie’s unmade bed, covers rumpled and a few clothing items scattered around on the floor. He huffed in amusement and went to pick up after his friend, a shirt, a slipper whose partner Bucky didn’t see anywhere in sight. He was smiling softly as he cleaned up a bit, startling when Stevie in the adjacent bathroom cursed under her breath.

He dropped the clothing he’d been folding on the dresser and took the few steps towards the bathroom. He did not expect to be met with Stevie’s back, sans shirt, suspenders hanging limply at her waist, one on the floor, as she examined the bruising forming on her right side over her ribs. It didn’t look good, he only hoped nothing was broken. His gaze flickered up her frame to check on her shoulder, but his sharp gaze stalled on the bandages wrapped around her chest and back a number of times.

“Are you hurt?” He blurted, her bright blue eyes flicking up to meet his in the mirror above the sink.

She blinked when he glanced down again and she realized he was looking at the bandages that were wrapped tightly around her chest, her breasts, more specifically, flattening them. “Uh, yes? But like, it’s not bad or anything…the bandages aren’t covering up an injury or anything, though…if that’s what you mean.”

Bucky nodded, still looking rather confused as his gaze remained stuck on the bandages. She shifted, picking up her shirt and Bucky’s gaze snapped down to her hands. She’d washed up already and her hands didn’t look nearly as bad as he’d originally thought, which was good. He watched in growing embarrassment when she turned and held her rumpled shirt in front of her chest…_covering herself up._

_Oh Christ, Barnes. You’re such a pervert._

He grimaced, averting his gaze and ignoring the rising warmth in his cheeks. “_Sorry,_ didn’t mean to stare,” He apologized, pointedly looking away and giving her space.

She huffed, sounding amused more than anything as she strode past him on quiet feet, slipping her shirt back on as she went. “Hang on,” He sighed, catching sight of the blood now crusted over her cheek. “You’ve still got blood on your face,” He explained, ducking into the bathroom to wet a cloth.

When he came back into the bedroom, Stevie was watching him carefully, shirt still unbuttoned and showing glimpses of those bandages on her narrow chest. She had one blonde eyebrow raised at him as he approached with the cloth and then gestured to the bed. “Sit down for a minute and let me clean it, yeah?”

She rolled her eyes but sat down, knowing if she didn’t, she’d never hear the end of it, surely.Bucky approached quietly, tugging up his pants a little before he knelt down in front of her. She was about to voice her concern of him dirtying his new uniform, but stopped short when he pressed the wet cloth to her injured cheek. She didn’t flinch, but she did inhale sharply. It stung, but not terribly, she’d definitely had worse.

She found herself looking into his face, his eyes dark, a colour she wished she could see properly. She flicked her eyes away from his look of concern as he wiped away the blood carefully, all too gentle, she thought. He dabbed at it slowly, loosening the caked blood until it started to fall away, glad to see her lip wasn’t split too badly and it had already stopped bleeding. He couldn’t help letting his gaze flicker down to where her shirt was unbuttoned, showing off the sharpness of her collarbone and the steady slow rise and fall of her chest…hidden beneath those off-white bandages she had wound around her.

He could see the slight swell of her breasts, even beneath the bandages and for the first time in…well, maybe it was the first time he’d let himself think of her as something other than a girl. Because this was a woman sitting before him, she’d grown up somewhere down the line, wouldn’t you know it. _Hell_, she hadn’t been a girl in quite a few years now, but Bucky just hadn’t thought about it…not exactly…maybe a little.

His gaze slipped back up to see if she’d caught him staring and was relieved to note that she was still looking elsewhere, even if her cheeks were growing a bit pink. He let himself look again, watching the gentle swell keep rising and falling and noted the way the bandages appeared a bit tight and then wondered at how big her breasts really were. Surely less than a handful, thought that didn’t turn him off. She’d always been slender, lithe, even _dainty_ and he’d always liked the way she looked, even when she tried to look boyish. It was just_ her_, his Stevie.

He focused his gaze back on the cloth in his hand and sighed, shaking his head a bit. “You need a bandage on that or it could get infected. It’s deeper than I thought,” Bucky admitted, returning to the bathroom and placing the cloth in the sink before washing his hands.

“Really? I didn’t think it looked too bad, I’m sure I’ll be fine without one-“

“No,” A single word, decisive.

Stevie swallowed hard, Bucky didn’t usually take that sort of clipped tone with her and she let her gaze follow her friends’ retreating form into the bathroom to rummage beneath the cabinet for the well stocked first aid kit she kept there. She shivered a little at his sudden departure. While he’d been kneeling in front of her, he’d unknowingly placed a comforting hand on her thigh, the warmth of his palm seeping in through her trousers and making her flush, just a little.

She could feel his gaze sweeping over her and she knew he’d been looking at the way she’d bandaged her breasts, she also knew he’d probably ask about it sooner rather than later and she wasn’t exactly sure what she’d tell him when he finally did.

She was startled from her thoughts when he reappeared a minute later with a bandage and some ointment in hand. “Is that really nec-“ Stevie started to ask, but was briskly cut off.

“_Just-_“ Bucky breathed, kneeling down in front of her, tone sharp. “Let me do this, please.”

Stevie swallowed hard, unable to look away from her friend as he attempted to beg her with his eyes. She had no choice but to nod. Bucky didn’t whip out the big guns unless absolutely necessary. _Alright then, letting him do this it is_.

She felt the warmth of his fingertips beneath her jaw as he gently tipped her chin up and to the right, baring her injured left cheek to him. He let go a moment later and she kept still, listening as he uncapped the tube of ointment and got the bandage read, missing the warmth of his fingers along her jaw already. The next thing she felt was a warm breath against the side of her face, along her throat and then the coolness of the ointment as he applied the bandage already coated in it. Over the smell of the ointment, this close, she could smell _him_, a distinct woods smell that somehow always clung to him. She wondered if it was his cologne or something at his home that just sort of clung to him, but regardless, she could always pick it out whenever he was near.

His fingers were gentle as he smoothed the bandage down, making sure the sticky part of the fabric laid flat and clung to her skin as it should. When he was done, his warm fingertips seemed to linger for a long moment and she swore she could feel the ghost of their caress trail down her bared throat. When she swallowed in the next moment, the warmth disappeared entirely and she turned to find Bucky still kneeling on the floor in his new uniform, probably dirtying the knees already. She wasn’t really sure what to make of the expression on his face, though.

“Is there a reason you…” He trailed off, gesturing to her chest, a bit of an embarrassed air about him.

Stevie arched a delicate blonde brow, lips pursing slightly as she pressed them together tightly, making them turn nearly white. Bucky cleared his throat a bit, shifting a little awkwardly as he sat back on his heels. “Is there a reason you wrap your…breasts, like that?” He finally managed to finish asking.

Her bright blue gaze drifted then, focusing on a spot over his shoulder for a beat before she blew it back out slowly. She shrugged, the movement a little jarring and stilted “I guess I just…want to fit in around you and uh…” She cleared her throat a bit. “They can sometimes get in the way, so I-“ She huffed out a breath, feeling a tad embarrassed to be talking so plainly about her breasts like this. “I just wrap them up to keep them pressed down, is all. I don’t want them showing if I can help it, when I wear my shirts and all,” She admitted, voice growing quiet.

She wasn’t really sure why she did it, though they were at least some of the reasons, she supposed. She glanced up through her long lashes at him and Bucky slowly pushed out a breath as he thought about that. “Is that why you wear your hair up too? To…to _fit in_ around _me?_” He asked quietly, trying to understand.

She shrugged a bit, looking down at her lightly scuffed hands as she folded them in her lap, resting atop her slender thighs. “I guess it’s part of it, I’ve never really felt like real girly girl_,_ you know? Ma always called me her little _tom boy _for a reason, _hell, _my attitude sure doesn’t fit with what society says a girl should be like,” She rolled her eyes a bit at that. “And I guess I’ve always been afraid you’d treat me differently if I looked more like a girl…a woman,” She corrected, nose scrunching up a bit at the word. “I don’t look like much of a woman anyway, no curves and all, crooked nose and I figure, if I sort of look like a guy, you’ll just keep treatin’ me as your equal, a friend, you know?”

Bucky let that sink in for a good minute and then shook his head slowly. “Stevie,” He said softly, plaintively. “You could wear dresses or skirts, _pantyhose_ even and I’d still treat you like _you._ You are my equal, in every way and what you wear doesn’t matter to me one bit. What’s between your legs or how you dress doesn’t make you who you are, you dummy,” He huffed, pushing lightly at her bony knee.

Stevie was looking at him in disbelief now, rather flabbergasted by the concept. She didn’t see how that would work. If she were to dress like a dame, then surely Bucky would treat her differently, wouldn’t he? Maybe he’d flirt with her more, even if he already sort of did it pretty regularly, not that she _minded_ the flirting, per say. She just…well, he was her friend, it didn’t exactly _mean_ anything, Bucky just did it to tease her. He always did say he wasn’t interested in dames much, not when he had a best friend and a good family to keep him happy. It’s not like Stevie felt as if she would make a pretty dame either, even if she went through the trouble and dolled herself up.

She was frail and sickly, pale as freshly fallen snow and had an attitude to boot. She grimaced at the thought and Bucky’s eyes narrowed at the action. “What’s got you making that ugly face now?” Bucky teased, nudging her knee again.

She rolled her eyes. “My ugly face, of course.”

Now it was Bucky’s turn to grimace. “Stevie, your face ain’t ugly, you’re just _makin’_ an ugly face right now. What’s with you? You don’t believe me?”

Stevie huffed, crossing her arms in front of her narrow chest and winced when her ribs twinged a bit, but she knew nothing was broken, just some nasty bruising and ignored it. “I just, if I were to dress up like a dame, I know for a fact you’d stop being _you_ around me, alright? You’d probably go off and find another guy friend, you’re always sayin’ you’re not interested in girls and that’s okay, Buck, if you aren’t, I mean. Nothin’s wrong with it, you and I both know that, said as much too.”

She was rambling now and Bucky was looking at her in obvious confusion. Obvious to anyone who wasn’t Stevie, however. He knew he must be making a face, what it looked like he wasn’t sure, but it was probably a doozy. He quickly raised a hand in a gesture for silence and Stevie blessedly, for once, followed the unspoken command.

“Stevie…” He said slowly, trying to keep his mouth from twitching and giving himself away. “Do you think I’m…what, a queer? A fairy?” He asked carefully, not angry or even insulted; you loved who you loved, Stevie knew how he felt about that sort of thing because Stevie wholeheartedly agreed with the sentiment.

She cleared her throat a bit, meeting his gaze with a light flush on her porcelain cheeks. “Well, _yeah,_” She admitted, tone void of judgement as if she was just stating a fact like a _well, duh,_ if you will_._

Bucky hung his head, hands coming up to cover his mouth and in turn, his ridiculous smile. “It’s okay, Bucky!” She quickly reassured, delicate hands flying out to land steady on his shoulders, gripping them firmly. “There’s nothin’ to be ashamed of, you love who you love, _remember?_ I won’t tell no one and-and I know any guy would be lucky to have such a handsome guy like you, so don’t worry, okay?”

But Stevie only grew more and more concerned as Bucky’s shoulders started to shake and soft choked sounds escaped his lips. Stevie’s eyes widened in horror, thinking that Bucky was crying and she gasped, reaching out to cup Bucky’s cheeks to pull his head up. She was shocked to find that Bucky’s wasn’t crying after all, he was _laughing_.

“Wha-“ Stevie breathed, unsure and confused as Bucky suddenly let it out and burst into laughter, apparently unable to contain it.

Both of his palms came up to clasp lightly over Stevie’s as she cupped his face in her battered hands and just _held him._ He was still laughing a minute later and Stevie was giving him a sort of exasperatedly fond look, waiting for his friend to calm enough to actually talk about this. But Bucky apparently couldn’t seem to pull himself together enough to do so.

“Are you gonna’ stop laughing any time soon, pal?” Stevie sighed after a while, an amused tilt to her lips as she watched her friend pull back a little to wipe at his eyes.

“Oh, _Lord,_ Stevie,” Bucky finally managed to sigh, regaining his breath. “You’ve got it all wrong,” He told her, smiling fondly at the blonde as he shook his head in exasperation.

Stevie’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What are you _talkin’_ about, Barnes?”

“I’m not a fairy, Stevie,” He sighed, but he was smiling, enjoying when her cheeks suddenly _bloomed_ pink at his words. “I don’t like men, not like that at least. I don’t think so, anyway-“ He chuckled absently, waving the thought away.

“But you always say that you’re not _looking_ for a dame!” Stevie blurted, eyes wide and head shaking, thinking Bucky was clearly in denial or-_or something._

Bucky smiled and it was one of those absurdly _fond_ smiles he saved just for Stevie, though usually only directed at her when she wasn’t looking. She recognized it immediately, however, and grew quiet in the face of it. “That’s because I’m not _looking_ for a dame. I’m not looking for no man, either, in case you were wonderin’. Why would I be looking for either, when I’ve got the _woman_ _I love_ right in front of me, huh?” He murmured, tone soft, sweet…

Stevie blinked, the words sitting there, filtering in and just…not making a whole lot of sense to her right then. Her brows furrowed in confusion and she made a face. “What are ya’ talkin’ about, Buck?” She sighed, reaching up and pinching the bridge of her nose. “It’s just _me_ sittin’ here.”

Bucky was full on smiling now as he set his palms atop Stevie’s thin thighs, letting the warmth of his hands spread through to her skin beneath her trousers. She dropped her hand from her face at the gentle touch, just as Bucky admitted, “That’s right, it’s just you and me sittin’ here, Stevie and I’ll say it again, slowly for you now because I knot you’re hearing’s not all that great-“ He said teasinly, ignoring the eye roll she gave him in response. “Why…would I be looking for either, when I’ve got the _woman I love_ right here in front of me?”

Stevie’s brows remained adorably furrowed and Bucky wanted to bash his head against something in fond exasperation. “O-_kay_,” She agreed, just as slow and Bucky _really_ wanted to roll his eyes at that tone. “But you know I love you, too, so I don’t really get what you’re sayin’ here, Buck,” She sighed, and it was a deep sigh, mind.

“_Christ_, you’re dense,” He blurted, not expecting the sudden punch to his shoulder at the remark, nor her reprimand of a very annoyed name calling of, _jerk._

He should have known better. He laughed, reaching up to rub at the spot she’d hit, letting his gaze slip back up to settle on her pretty face, just _willing_ her to understand. Her expression was confused, _sure_, but he could see dawning realization slowly creeping across her fair features. They always said they loved each other, but…but not quite like that, not with so much emphasis behind them. He gave her a timid smile, _willing_ her to get it and not be so stubborn for just a second or three.

“Are you startin’ ta’ get it now?” He asked gently, exasperation clear in his tone but a shit-ton of fondness in there too.

She blinked at him, her eyes rather wide right then. “A-are you saying…that you’re…**_in _**love…with me?” She asked, her tone shy and sweet, not at all like her usual pointy self.

Bucky smiled, his hands skating up her thighs a little before he let go and placed them on her cheeks, cupping them gently, mindful of the bandage. “Yeah, doll…I’m saying that I’m _in_ love with you,” He admitted, still smiling at her as the tips of his fingers caressed her cheeks.

He was unprepared, however, for her sudden exclamation of, “But _why?_”

Bucky blinked, letting his right hand drop from her injured cheek, his left reaching back to tug the elastic gently from her hair. She let him, looking flabbergasted as her eyes darted back and forth between his eyes, looking for something she wasn’t going to find. Bucky huffed softly, letting the elastic fall to the bed as he took down her hair and shook out her curls carefully with his fingers.

“Do I need a reason? I sort of just do, I mean, I think I’ve always loved you,” He explained.“I don’t think I’ve ever really analyzed it or nothin’, you were just you and I liked you, even the annoying bits,” He teased, still smiling, though maybe a touch shyly himself now. “For whatever reason, those seem to be my favourite bits, if you care to know.”

Stevie is shaking her head now, eyes still rather wide with her apparent disbelief. “You really havin’ that much trouble believin’ me, Stevie?” He asked sincerely, not expecting her to nod vigorously.

“Well, _yeah!_” She blurted, voice having gone a touch high and squeaky. “It’s-_Bucky-_“ She breathed. “Lookit’ me! I’m skin and bones, I’m not _pretty_ or _sweet_, I have a _nasty_ temper and I cuss and pick fights, I don’t wear skirts or polkadot dresses or-_or-_“

Bucky couldn’t take it anymore, he needed to make her see, make her understand that it wasn’t_ like that._

He leaned forward on his knees, forcing her legs apart as he pressed into her space. She was too startled to do anything when he shifted closer, one of his careful hands resting at the back of her head, winding into her hair, the other cupping the side of her neck lightly as he leaned in close. He pressed a chaste kiss to her lips, feeling the slightly chapped skin there, but beneath that, the pillowy softness of them beneath his own. She made a soft noise then, just there in the back of her throat, the sound barely a sound at all as she seemed to tremble in his grasp.

He kept the kiss chaste, hoping he hadn’t spooked her with his abruptness and when he pulled back, his lashes fluttering as he opened his eyes, he found Stevie’s lashes still kissing the tops of her pink cheeks and this close…this close he could see her cute little freckles, so much more numerous than they were when they were kids, once upon a simpler time. She was all the more beautiful for it.

Her eyes finally opened a beat later and he noticed the slightly laboured rise and fall of her chest as her breathing increased at the same time he noticed just how startlingly _blue_ her beautiful bright eyes were as they gazed back at him in wide-eyed wonder. She seemed to flounder in an attempt to find the right words, any words at all right then and Bucky felt much the same way.

So, he leaned in and pressed another kiss to her perfectly pink lips, hands never having left the back of her head and the side of her neck in the first place, tightening only a fraction as he pressed his lips against hers. When he shifted the angle, only a touch, he felt her soften beneath him, lips parting as she relaxed into the kiss, his nose brushing hers lightly as he shifted in closer to her.

She let out a whimper not a second later, no doubt feeling the warmth of his body only mere inches away from pressing against her properly and perhaps desiring no space at all between them. Bucky couldn’t help himself as he pressed his hips into the edge of the bed, her slim thighs resting against his sides as he let his hand slip from the side of her neck to caress down over her shoulder. His tongue swiped teasingly against the parted seem of her lips at the same time he let his hand caress over the barely there swell of her right breast trapped beneath her shirt and bandages.

Bucky’s ear was suddenly ringing, the kiss broken as he pulled his head back in confusion. He had the strange urge to shake his head a bit and found himself looking back at Stevie, who looked flushed with what looked like arousal and serious embarrassment. _What had just_…and then he caught sight of Stevie’s delicate hand raised-_poised-_right beside his face and Bucky instantly registered the stinging pain throbbing in his cheek.

Bucky didn’t need to ask her if she’d just slapped him, though he was sure his incredulous expression was doing that for him anyway. The stinging of his cheek was pretty well answer enough, too. They stared at each other, wide-eyed surprise and maybe just a touch of arousal on both of their flushed faces. Neither bothered to think much in the next moment, however, instead eagerly meeting once again in a much, _much_ more heated kiss.

This time when Stevie whimpered, the sound was louder and Bucky _felt it_ against his own lips as she parted hers and let him in deeper than before. They kissed, over and over again, lips barely separating while they pressed eager kisses to equally eager lips. Bucky groaned softly as he shifted forward and then he was pushing himself up from the floor and guiding her back onto the rumpled bedding.

She went willingly and when Bucky’s big, _warm_ hand slipped along her bicep this time, thumb barely skating across the underside of her bandages, she shivered and for once, it wasn’t because of the cold. Bucky shuddered a little at the arousal that crept up under his skin at her reponse, breaking their kiss and hovering over her prone form. One of her hands was cast up above her head carelessly, the other gripping Bucky’s shoulder tight as he looked down at her, pretty blonde hair spread out in a halo around her, wide bright eyes dark with arousal all the same.

“You’re so goddamn beautiful,” He choked, voice breathy and rough as he gazed lovingly upon her.

She didn’t agree or disagree, but he could see her eyes tracking him, taking in his expression, the earnestness she no doubt found there. He smiled at her, slow and sweet, her bright blue eyes flickering up to his as he leaned down over her, bracing a knee at the edge of the bed.

“Bucky I-“ She started to whisper, but it was hoarse, _strained_ and Bucky swallowed thickly as he drew back, only a little.

“_Hush,_” He murmured, reaching up and caressing her uninjured cheek. “We don’t have to do anything, Stevie. This is enough, just having you know…just you knowing that I love you…that’s enough.”

She swallowed hard and then suddenly she was sitting up, forcing him to move and step back onto the floor. He wasn’t there for long, however, as she quickly grasped his hand as she shifted up onto her knees on the bed, leading him around to the side, tugging him insistently as she then slipped off the bed to stand on the floor. Once he was sitting at the edge of the bed, she took a step away from him but stayed in front of him.

“It isn’t enough,” She breathed. “T-tomorrow you’re-“ She shook her head, unable to continue and instead breathed out roughly, “I love you, Bucky. I love you, you know that, don’t you?”

“I do now,” He consoled, feeling that awful pang in his chest. He knew what she meant, but he didn’t want to think about that, not now.

He shifted back to sit more comfortably on the bed, wanting so badly to reach out to her, bring her in close again, show her it was going to be okay. He’d taken off his hat when he’d come in and Stevie’s gaze flickered to it resting on the dresser before she let her gaze return to Bucky in his dress uniform. He looked so handsome and perfect, every bit the man she’d always admired and loved. She watched him, watching her and shivered in nervous anticipation…as she shrugged her shoulders and allowed her shirt, to slip from her frail shoulders. It fell to her elbows and she let her arms drop so that the sleeves fell easily from her wrists, before it fluttered to the floor to land at her feet.

Bucky watched with wide dark eyes as she reached for her belt, fumbling with the buckle for only a moment before she slipped it free. Once it was unbuckled, she didn’t even need to unbutton her trousers; they’d already started to slip from her hips. She gave them a slight shove and they too joined her shirt on the floor. Bucky inhaled shakily as he was met with the sight of her in men’s underwear instead of panties-not that he would have expected anything less, really-and watched as she toed off her socks, shoes having been left at the door when they’d come in.

She was looking at him quietly while she let him simply look at her. He’d seen her nearly naked lots of times growing up together. Usually when Sarah was giving her daughter sponge baths while she was ill, but it happened less and less as time went on and Bucky couldn’t exactly remember the last time he’d seen her without at least an undershirt and pyjama bottoms on at the very least.

He watched as she shifted her golden hair back over one delicate shoulder, the long curly mess of it going easily as she raised her right arm a little to reveal the end of the bandage…where it was tied off in a small bow. Bucky didn’t realize it, but he was digging his hands into the bedding as he watched her reach for the little bow and undid it deftly.

The look upon her face was filled with nerves, but earnest with desire. She _wanted _Bucky to finally _see her_ and she knew he would. He watched as she undid the bow easily, the bandages loosening of their own accord for a moment before she slipped a couple of fingers beneath them, making room. They gave, the fabric loosening easily now that there wasn’t anything keeping it secured and he watched as they started to fall to the floor to join the growing pile of her clothes. When the last bit of the bandages slipped from her narrow chest to expose her, she grasped the waistband of her underwear and pushed those down too.

Bucky had stopped breathing somewhere along the way, maybe even as far back as when she’d plucked at the bow of her bandages, but now, _now_ he dragged in a desperate breath of much needed air as he took in the sight of the woman he’d loved for the better part of his life standing naked before him.

She was slim, barely a curve to be seen, more childlike than anything, but she was clearly a woman, even as she stood there all 5 foot nothing, wisps of her golden curls having shifted back over her shoulders to settle along her prominent collarbones. Her skin was as milky white as ever, near pristine save for random smattering of freckles and though Bucky knew she had her fair share of little scars from their childhood, none of it detracted from her beauty.

She was looking at him with those big blue eyes, a hesitance barely masked by her nerves, but Bucky saw it for what it was and outstretched his hand towards her, palm up. Her bright gaze tracked the movement and this time there was no hesitance there when she reached out to him and slipped her little hand into his. He pulled her forward gently and she followed him easily, letting him draw her into the space he’d made between his legs for her. She fit there perfectly and Bucky tried not to think about that too hard, really, he did.

“You’re so gorgeous, Stevie. Prettiest sweetheart I’ve ever seen,” He confessed lowly, voice deep and _Christ,_ Stevie had never heard him sound quite like that before.

She swallowed hard, a curious little sound escaping her as she placed her hands on his shoulders to steady herself, one of his big hands wrapped around her bare wrist gently, thumb caressing her absently as he looked her over.

He loved every bit of her, always and forever and now that he’d _seen_ every bit of her, he knew it with absolute certainty. He felt her shiver in his grasp and let his gaze slip down to the soft swell of her breasts, small, yes, but perfect and rounded, sweet pink nipples hard and just begging to be caressed, licked, sucked…

He groaned softly at the thought and her gaze snapped to his, realizing what he was looking at. She flushed, that blush spreading like wildfire across her cheeks, the bridge of her nose, down her throat and racing towards her breasts. Bucky was licking his lips before he could help himself and she trembled as his hands moved to grasp her sides gently, careful of the bruising just above where his hands settled.

“Can I touch you?” He breathed, meeting her gaze and rather enjoying the flush he’d managed to work her into.

“Y-you sort of already are,” She tried to sass, but Bucky saw right through it.

“I just don’t really want another slap is all,” He huffed, a hint of laughter in his voice, smile plain as day.

Stevie did laugh at that, her nervous laughter making Bucky grin. “Sorry about that,” She apologized, voice soft.

Bucky smirked, rolling his shoulders a bit. “My fault, I copped a feel.”

Stevie laughed again and it was the sweetest sound. Bucky’s warm hands slipped down her sides a little further, trailing the tips of his fingers lightly against the outsides of her thighs that tickled her something awful. “You going to answer me, sweetheart?”

Stevie shivered, near violently at the ticklish sensation his fingertips provoked and she nodded, murmuring, “You can t-touch me.”

Bucky hummed, pleased as he watched her shift, surprised she was letting him get away with being all sweet on her, throwing around _sweetheart_ and _pretty_ like it was going out of style. “Do you want me to? Touch you, I mean.”

Stevie’s gaze snapped to his, delicate hands squeezing at his shoulders for a brief moment as she blew out a breath. “Of _course_ I want you to touch me, Buck. I want you to do _everything _to me.”

Now it was Bucky’s turn to blow out a rough breath. “Yeah? Like what?”

Stevie froze and Bucky tried to reassure her by dragging his hands up her sides again, going a little higher on the next pass but not quite skimming her breasts just yet. She shivered all the same, however, and he soon tipped his head down, looking up at her through his own lashes to catch her wide-eyed stare.

“What?” She asked uncertainly.

Bucky hummed, nodding as he let one of his hands slip up to gently caress her hair, running a few of her big curls through his fingers. It was silky soft, just as he’d remembered it from all those times he’d been by her sickbed and had been allowed to touch, caress and comfort. “Tell me what you want me to do to you, doll,” He asked again.

She trembled a little, nervous and unsure and Bucky consoled her, seeing how uncomfortable she seemed to be about answering. “Alright, I tell you what…how about you tell me something simple, anything at all, that you’d like me to do, right now,” He suggested.

She bit her lower lip then, glancing down his body and was unhappy with the fact that he was still dressed, covering up what she knew was a wonderfully handsome body beneath all those clothes. “H-how about you…let me undress you, to start,” She whispered, cheeks still flushed and lips wet at her own suggestion, the _brazenness_ of it.

Bucky tried not to groan at the sight and subsequently the suggestion and reached up to loosen his tie. He was stopped, however, when Stevie clasped her hands, her palms a little rough, over top of his. “Let _me_ undress you,” She repeated and Bucky let his hands fall away, unable to say much of anything at all to that.

She stepped in closer then and gently loosened Bucky’s tie, being careful as she pulled the knot free and dragged the fabric through its loop before she set it aside on the nightstand, before reaching back to the buttons on his jacket. Bucky’s breathing was growing a bit short, _laboured_ as he watched her nimble fingers unfasten the brass buttons on his coat and then slowly pushed it from his shoulders. He shrugged out of it easily, helping her along a bit and setting the jacket carefully aside at the foot of the bed.

Stevie’s fingers started in on his shirt buttons not a beat later and soon she had them undone, shirttails pulled from where they’d been tucked into his trousers. It didn’t take much for her to push that too from his shoulders, revealing a white undershirt hidden beneath it. She draped his dress shirt over his jacket, mentally promising herself that she’d iron his clothes later for him. She looked up into his face then, seeing the openness of his expression, the smile tugging at his lips, the _adoration_ and _love_ therein.

She swallowed hard, throat tight and pressed in closer again, fitting perfectly between his spread legs as she reached for the belt on his trousers. His chest was rising and falling faster now, hers was too if she’d paid any attention to herself. She thought she would be embarrassed, standing naked in front of Bucky, but all she felt was a bit of nerves, because _well,_ she’d never let anyone see her like this before, let alone touch her. Bucky had been her first real _kiss_ and it’d be something alright and now Bucky was staring at her like he thought she was gorgeous and _hell_, he’d _said_ she was the prettiest sweetheart…

She forced herself back into the moment and instead focused on unbuckling his belt. She succeeded after only a couple of slightly shaky attempts and Bucky shifted a bit to lean back and let her tug the tongue through the loops a bit easier. She dropped it to carelessly to the floor, the sound jarring against the floorboards, fingers already toying with the button of his trousers. Her gaze momentarily strayed to the solid line of his cock clearly visible through his dress pants and she whimpered a little at the sight, fingers stilling as the first button popped open.

Bucky’s hand clasped gently around her wrist then, keeping her still and he knew she saw when his cock twitched heavily beneath the layers of fabric at her soft whimper. “I-“ He forced himself to clear his throat when his voice came out rather rough. “I can keep them on, if you want.”

Her gaze snapped up to his and she shook her head, curls shifting with a whisper of sound against her shoulders. “I want you naked, Bucky,” She admitted quietly. “I’m just…a little nervous, is all.”

Bucky hummed, nodding in understanding, thumb tracing the underside of her wrist and feeling her pulse pounding against the pad of his thumb. “Let me do the rest then,” He whispered, standing up and guiding her back to the bed where he’d been sitting.

She acquiesced, sitting down as Bucky took up her place, but instead of his hands going straight to the buttons of his trousers, he reached for the hem of his undershirt first. Stevie shifted back across the bed a little, propping herself up on her hands as she watched him tug the shirt up and over his head, casting it to the floor in his haste, eyes never leaving her face.

Stevie’s breath caught in her throat as she took in the sight of James Buchanan Barnes, _shirtless._ Granted, she’d seen him shirtless before, but uh…it’d clearly been a while. _Did he always have muscles like that?_ She wondered, absently licking her lips as she watched him reach for the buttons of his trousers. She found herself holding her breath as he popped them open one by one and then pushed his trousers _and_ his underwear down in one fluid motion.

Her breath hitched before she could even think about keeping it in and Bucky grinned at her response, tugging off his pants and socks and draping them over the nightstand so they weren’t left in a heap on the floor for the time being. Not that he cared, he just didn’t want her to feel like she needed to iron his clothes later, is all.

He turned his attention fully back to Stevie on the bed in the next moment and smiled as he watched her heated gaze drag down his frame, taking in every glorious inch of him and Bucky bit his lower lip to keep from saying something corny like, _like what you see?_ He was pretty sure Stevie knew he was thinking it anyway if the sudden disapproving eyebrow raise she levelled him with was any inclination.

“You’re rather handsome, you know,” She murmured, voice nothing above a whisper as she let herself just look at him.

Bucky huffed, shaking his head slowly. “I’ve got nothing on you, pretty,” He confessed, taking a couple of steps closer to the bed.

Stevie flushed at the compliment, shivering a little as Bucky seemed to _prowl_ towards her. “Scoot up the bed a bit, yeah?” Bucky urged, gesturing towards the pillows.

Stevie shifted onto her left hand before she crawled up the bed a little but before she could turn around to resettle herself up near her pillows, she felt the warmth of Bucky’s hand meet her side before sweeping along her lower back over the knobs of her spine and a little lower still. She gasped when the tips of his fingers skimmed the supple skin of her buttocks and Bucky’s hand stilled.

“He smacked you, didn’t he?” Bucky’s voice, though his tone had been rough, it had been full of love, sweetness too, but now, now it was filled with menace.

Stevie shuddered at the sound, looking over to where Bucky was standing next to the bed, hand outstretched and gently cupping the round globe of her ass. “He left a mark on you, here,” Bucky explained, brushing his thumb over the pink spot where there appeared to be a bit of purple coming up beneath her pale skin.

Stevie always did bruise like a peach. She gasped at the careful touch but didn’t flinch like he half expected her to. “It doesn’t hurt, not really,” She assured, shivering lightly at the way he was staring at her.

Bucky hummed, shaking his head, still obviously unhappy. “He shouldn’t have touched what doesn’t belong to him.”

Stevie did turn around at this, settling into the pillows on her back to look up at her friend with an arched brow. “Are you saying I belong to you? Because I have news for you, Bucky-“

Bucky quickly backtracked. “No, _no-_“ He breathed, climbing up onto the bed and gently bullying his way between Stevie’s long _gorgeously _parted legs, inwardly groaning at the sight of her spreading her legs wider to accommodate him. “You don’t belong to _anybody _but yourself, Stevie. You hear me?”

Stevie was still looking up at him with that delicately raised eyebrow and Bucky thought he really screwed up somehow, but she simply smiled at him, a bit of her usual bite coming back when she whispered, “I was going to tell you that I wouldn’t mind…belonging to you…so long as you belonged to me.”

Bucky swallowed thickly as he absorbed that little confession and couldn’t help himself as he leaned over her, hand snaking up to caress the side of her neck as he pressed in close for a heated kiss. “I’m yours,” He whispered against her lips, a soft whimper of, “And I’m yours,” reaching him in reply.

They kissed each other almost desperately after that, tongues meeting and soft sighs and gasps escaping them as their hands began to wander. The first tentative caress over the swell of one of her breasts and pert nipple had her hissing and arching up from the mattress, twisting in an attempt to get closer to the warmth of his body as he pressed in closer. She was unprepared for the groan Bucky suddenly let loose as his hips met hers, his cock, which had been hard and throbbing insistently, now pressed against the crease of her thigh and it felt _huge._

Their kiss broke at the sudden press and she gasped, leg twitching as she felt his cock like a terrifyingly _large_ brand against her skin. “Oh, Buck-“ She breathed. “I d-don’t know if-“

“_Shh,_” He consoled, hands smoothing down along her sides, mindful of her bruised ribs. “I know, doll. We’re not rushing things, s’okay.”

But she was shaking her head, cheeks flushed and lips spit-slick and shiny, that little split at the edge of her mouth drawing him in and _Christ,_ Bucky wanted to _eat her alive._ She huffed then and forced him to sit back a bit as she sat up. Bucky was completely unprepared for one of her delicate hands to touch him, long fingers skating up the long length of his cock unexpectedly and making him grunt at the feathery caress. He was soon nearly doubled over, forehead pressed to her sharp collarbones and panting harshly as her careful fingers teased at his sensitive flesh, getting a feel for him. It twitched heavily with nearly every move and he kissed and licked at the soft skin of her neck.

He looked down between their bodies a moment later when she shifted her grip on him just a little. His gaze instantly snapped up to her face, however, unable to watch those deft fingers exploring his cock so sweetly. He was please to find her looking absolutely fascinated by the way it seemed to responded to her ministrations with a mind of its own.

It wasn’t until her thumb swept over the head of his cock, finding the bead of pre-come there, spreading it down along the sensitive ridge beneath the crown, swaying forward and cursing sharply as he thrust into her grasp, that her fascination turned into heated desire. She gasped softly as he thrust forward and though her touch had been light before, there was a surety to her movements when she wrapped her hand around his length, feeling him _throb _beneath her fingertips.

He groaned softly and shuddered as she attempted to stroke him, the scrapes on her palm rubbing against him feather light and _Christ_, he was so goddamn turned on by this woman. “Stevie, doll, honey, _sweetheart,_” He moaned thrusting shallowly into her light grip.

“Get a hand ‘round your cock and you’re all talk, ain’t ya, Buck?” She breathed shakily and Bucky knew it was meant to be teasing, but she wasn’t far off the mark.

“Get _your_ hand ‘round it and I am, sure. You want to hear me tell you all the sweet and dirty things I wanna’ do to ya’?” He gasped, hips stuttering forward a bit as she lightened her touch even more and went back to trailing the tips of her fingers along the underside of his shaft before letting go completely.

Bucky took in a shaky breath then, finally feeling like he could _think_ for a second as she instead started trailing her hands up the length of his stomach, fingertips caressing over his abs and higher and higher, until she was splaying her slightly scuffed up palms over his pecs, thumbs absently brushing his darkened nipples. He shivered at the gentle caress before carefully batting her hands aside. She let him push her hands down beside her and instead of touching him for the moment, she fisted them in the sheets at her sides.

“M-maybe I do wanna’ hear you talk…but you’d better follow it up with some action, _Romeo_,” She teased, voice far too breathy to really come across as such.

Bucky huffed and dropped himself down onto his left elbow, bracing it against the mattress beside her shoulder. “I’ll give you some action,” He muttered, letting his right hand slip down over her breast, shocking her with a little squeeze.

She moaned softly, the sound as sweet as sugar to Bucky and he bent down to kiss her, wanting to swallow the sound, keep it all for himself. She kissed him back eagerly and Bucky took the opportunity to explore her little body to his hearts content and she _let him._

His hand slipped along her side, feeling her ribs expanding with each deeper breath and he let the tips of his fingers explore further along the dip of her stomach, the jut of her hip. He could feel the bones of her hip and he huffed a little against her lips, thinking about all the times she liked to hip-check him and make him yelp. He lost himself in the feel of her body, hand slipping down lower to run teasing fingers through the soft down of her pubic hair, which was just as golden as the hair on the top of her head.

It wasn’t until the tips of his fingers teased a little too _close_ that she bucked up against him, breaking their kiss with the softest whine that Bucky realized he was in trouble, _big _trouble. “Oh, _God Stevie_, make that noise again for me, darlin’,” He begged.

She blushed furiously, sputtering in embarrassment as she squirmed against him, both hands now reaching up to wind themselves in his perfectly styled hair. He was startled when she dragged him forwards into a heated kiss and he lost his balance, barely managing to keep his weight off her as he dropped down onto both elbows now. He groaned against her lips, grinding his hips forward, his cock twitching heavily against the inside of her thigh.

She whimpered softly at the insistent heat of him and he could feel her trembling now. He broke the kiss reluctantly to prop himself up again and this time slipped his left down between them and between her legs. “C’mon, make that noise for me again, Stevie. Sounded so goddamn sweet,” He coerced, sliding the tips of his fingers through her pubic hair and then further into her folds.

She cried out softly at the first press of his index finger against the heat of her, her legs twitching as she spread them wider for him. Her cry wasn’t exactly what he’d been going for, but it was sweet all the same. He grunted in surprise when she bit his bottom lip and raised her hips at the same time, forcing his fingers to slip further into her heat, positively _groaning_ when he felt her answering slick opening to his caress.

“Oh _Christ,_ you’re soaking, aren’t you, baby doll,” He breathed, rhetoric question clearly, fingertip delving a bit deeper to slide against her slick folds, searching for her opening.

She was gasping now, twisting in his grasp, shaking apart beneath him and he groaned as her hands continued to muss up his hair, her hungry kisses weakening his resolve with every passing second. “Bucky, _please,_” She suddenly begged, sweet and desperate and Bucky groaned against her lips, pulling back a little.

“What do you want, sweet thing, huh? Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you, doll,” He assured her, nuzzling down along her jaw, nibbling and licking at the side of her neck, along her collarbone.

“Oh, _oh-_“ She gasped, hips shifting impatiently as his fingers kept up their exploring, swiping through her wetness but studiously avoiding her clit. “_Please, _just-just a little, just…one.”

Bucky raised a brow at her, cock twitching heavily against her thigh at the sound of her fucking _begging _him. “You want me to slip a finger into that tight little pussy, doll?”

“_Bucky!_” Stevie choked and Bucky outright laughed, watching as her cheeks turned positively _scarlet_.

“C’mon, it’s a pretty pussy, doll. Don’t gotta’ be embarrassed about me calling it like it is,” He insisted, soothing her with a gentle kiss at her temple.

She whined again and _that _was the sound he’d never forget so long as he breathed. “You want me to put a finger in you? You sure about that?”

Stevie shuddered at the words and then she was nodding fast. “Just-just one,” She whimpered, hips shifting as Bucky’s middle finger slipped teasingly against where she was wettest.

He bit his lower lip as he nodded, she didn’t need to beg him to get what she wanted, she’d never have to if he could help it. He’d always give her everything she ever wanted if he was able. His sudden groan was loud in the quiet of the bedroom as his finger slowly teased inside the tight, wet heat of her body.

“Oh, _oh-_“ Stevie whimpered again, back arching up from the bed as his thick finger pressed inexorably inside. “You-you’ve got some serious sausage fingers there, Buck.”

“_Christ,_” Bucky grunted, awash with a wave of desire as it rolled over him, her body practically _dragging_ his finger inside of her. “Y-yeah, well, I’m bigger ‘un you.”

She moaned softly, lashes fluttering closed for a moment as his finger slipped further inside, only to draw back out slowly and _press_ right back in again. Bucky lost himself in it for a long couple of minutes, slowly thrusting his finger inside of her over and over again as his thumb came teasingly close to her clit but avoided making contact, instead simply tracing her slick lips and dragging her wetness around, generally making a right mess of her.

“T-that’s it, sweetheart,” Bucky whispered, pressing gentle kisses to her slack lips, parted and panting, soft little moans and whimpers escaping her as he wound her tighter and tighter. “You ever play with yourself like this? I bet you slip more than one of your pretty little artist fingers in here, you’re opening up so sweetly for me,” He rumbled, dragging his lips along her jaw as she turned her head to the side and _mewled_.

“_Bucky-_“ She gasped, breath hitching, hips shifting impatiently as she suddenly turned her head back to look at him with dark lust-blown eyes, “Another.”

Bucky blanked, not…not following entirely. He swallowed, she couldn’t want him to… “Another, Buck, give me another finger, I can take it.”

There was a groaning sound and it took Bucky a moment to realize that it was coming from him, too caught up in the thought of slipping a couple of fingers inside that molten heat and wondering what it might feel like to sink his cock into her and feel her walls clutching at him just as desperately as they did his fingers.

“If you ask me if I’m sure, I’m gonna smack you upsi-“

She moaned, long and _oh so loud _when Bucky interrupted her, withdrawing his one finger and slipping two inside this time. He could feel her wet, _molten_ heat clutching at his fingers as he curled them slightly inside of her, making her writhe and moan and Bucky couldn’t help himself; he ground down against her, his cock hard and heavy against her thigh pulsing as he got the friction he desperately needed.

She gasped at the feeling of his cock pulsing against her thigh, the gentle _come hither _motion he made with his fingers inside of her, not deep, not probing, just…_feeling, _driving her insane_…_and then his thumb swiped over her clit and she shouted, back bowing up from the bed near painfully, hands leaving his hair to clutch hard at his shoulders, blunt nails digging into his flesh without meaning to.

Bucky hissed at the sting and ground against her again, groaning loudly as he swiped her clit again with the pad of his thumb. “Ah, _ah, yes,_” She gasped. “Please, Bucky, _more._”

Bucky licked his lips, looking down at this perfect woman and just _wanting, _wanting her so damn much. He nodded, brushing his lips lightly against her kiss-swollen ones, nipping lightly at her plush bottom lip and revelling in her slightly pained whimper at the sting. He continued his assault on her clit, no longer teasing. He wanted to make her come, he was going to make her fall apart and then do it all over again and again and _again._

He kept thrusting his fingers inside of her, slow but deliberate, the swipes of his thumb against that hardened little bean getting faster and faster, applying more pressure too. He’d only ever pleasured a girl once like this before and it’d been a half-assed drunken fumbling in the dark with some faceless dame in a bar way back when. She’s squealed when she came and Bucky had choked on a name that definitely hadn’t been hers when she’d brought him off with a hand down his trousers. This was nothing like that.

“You going to come for me, pretty? Going to tighten up around my nice thick fingers and make a mess?” He coaxed, thumb pressing in a little harder, rubbing circles around her clit as his fingers continued to curl and thrust up inside of her.

She was positively _dripping _now, coating his fingers with her slick and slipping down onto the bedding. There were wet _squelching_ sounds that had even him blushing something fierce as they reached his ears. She whimpered _yes,_ nodding desperately as she ground her hips back onto his fingers, forcing them in a touch deeper without meaning to and at the same moment, he swept his thumb repeatedly against her clit.

She came right then, her entire lithe frame tensing up impossibly so. Her lips parted, head pressed back against the pillows, blonde hair a mess of unruly curls swept up around her, her pretty face awash in undeniable pleasure.

Bucky groaned lowly, unable to look away, his fingers still moving within her, thumb still rubbing in harsh little circles as she shuddered and moaned, hips moving of their own accord as she rode along the waves of her pleasure. Her entire _being_ seemed to tremble as she started whimpering, one of her hands leaving its perch on his shoulder to clasp the back of his neck and drag him in for a fierce kiss. It was mess, sloppy and desperate and Bucky felt her teeth come out to play when he slipped his tongue into her mouth, eager for any taste of her he could have.

It didn’t take long before she was twitching and whimpering uncomfortably and he stopped the movement of his fingers. He withdrew them carefully a moment later and pushed himself up onto his other hand a bit to better see her as he broke their kiss. She was gazing up at him with wide-eyed wonder, cheeks pink and flush spreading beneath her breasts now, her nipples still standing hard and peaked, a delightful pink Bucky knew he’d have to wrap his lips around soon or he might just die.

Bucky watched as her now bright red lips parted as if she were about to speak but she couldn’t find the right words apparently, and started shaking her head instead. Bucky couldn’t stop himself from smiling down at her then, his own cheeks and lips flushed a healthy pink and dark mess of hair an absolute disaster. “How are you feeling, doll? I bet you feel good,” He murmured, letting the knuckles of his free hand, the one covered in her slick, brush lightly against the underside of her breast.

She shivered hard at that, a soft whine escaping her as her skin flushed even darker at his words. “Of _course_, I feel good, Bucky. You made me feel so good,” She breathed, biting down on her plump lower lip and drawing it into her mouth for a beat.

When she let it go, it was even darker than before. He couldn’t stop himself from reaching up and brushing his thumb across it. Her eyes widened almost imperceptibly as he did so and Bucky didn’t realize why at first, not until the wetness on his fingers caught the light and they practically _glistened_ with her slick. He groaned softly as her tongue darted out to swipe along his skin, watching as she tasted herself on his thumb.

“Ah, _fuck_,” He muttered, voice practically dripping with lust.

The sound of it drew her gaze sharply to his and then she was parting her lips and dragging the digit into her mouth to give it a light suck. Bucky’s hips jerked forward at the sensation and she moaned as he did so, sucking a little harder on his thumb. He was panting by the time she finally let go and then he felt both of her delicate hands on his chest. She pushed at him roughly, almost impatiently and he blinked in confusion, a question on the tip of his tongue.

“Lay down,” She breathed, licking her lips and giving him another impatient shove.

Bucky didn’t give himself much time to think about it and shifted over to the right of her to lay down on his back. His hands were already reaching for her as he laid back against the pillows and she didn’t keep him waiting, quickly sitting up and slipping a leg over his hips to settle over him, straddling him oh so perfectly.

Bucky’s hands instantly went to her perfect little hips and he let out a shuddering breath as he felt her shift against him, dragging her slick heat over his cock as it was pinned again his abdomen beneath her gentle weight. “_God, _Bucky,” She said shakily, delicate hands splaying wide over his ribs, just _feeling_ the way his chest expanded with every laboured breath he took. “Never felt so good before.”

Bucky licked his lips, letting his hands travel lightly up her sides, mindful of her bruises. “You feel so good, Stevie. So goddamn perfect,” He agreed, biting his lower lip as he reached up to tentatively cup her perfect breasts with both of his large hands.

She whimpered, trembling in his grasp as he swept his thumbs over her pert little nipples, feeling them harden even more beneath his touch. Her hips shifted again as he lightly pinched them and she gasped sharply and ground down upon him, his impossibly hard cock slipping against her folds and making them _both_ whine. Stevie’s nails left little crescent patters along his chest and Bucky arched up beneath her, lifting her nearly clear off the bed.

She huffed a soft laugh while secretly marvelling at his strength as she leant down over him to steal a kiss. “You want to come?” She whispered, nipping at his bottom lip before sucking teasingly on his tongue.

He groaned, hands quickly slipping around to caress down her back, feeling each ridge of her spine, the rise and fall of her body with each deep breath. “I-I don’t have’ta,” He tried to insist, content to simply enjoy this closeness, _hell_ if she kept rocking her hips like that he might actually be able to come from that little stimulation alone.

She hummed at that, lifting her hips up and back just a smidge, his cock suddenly left wet and bereft of her warmth. He shuddered, licking his lips as she knelt above him, hands still splayed widely over his chest, no longer idle as she teased over his nipples and down his abs, making them twitch with her featherlight caresses.

“I’m not leavin’ you hangin’, Buck,” She murmured, licking her lips as she let her eyes rake over his prone form, taking in the sight of him breathing hard, fast, the way his eyes seemed to be darker than anything and wide as saucers as he looked up at her, desire written all over his face.

Bucky didn’t think he’d ever seen a more beautiful sight as his own gaze swept over her pretty little body, she just looked so goddamn _petit_ and he told her just that. She flushed something awful at his words and then pinched his nipple meanly. “Y_ow-_“ He howled, arching up from the bed and she struggled to keep her seat, smirking darkly down at him.

“Just because I let you call me _pretty_, doesn’t mean I’m going to tolerate you callin’ me _little_, you jerk,” She admonished and Bucky hissed through clenched teeth as she soothed the pinch with a swipe of her thumb over his abused nipple.

“N-noted, _punk,_” He agreed, trying not to grin.

He was ridiculously turned on and _Christ,_ but she was going to kill him one day. She smirked down at him, biting her bottom lip almost compulsively as she looked him over. Her gaze strayed a little lower and she watched as Bucky’s cock twitched heavily between them. She swallowed hard, throat working as she attempted to find the right words, but they failed her for the moment.

Bucky thought maybe he might be a little bigger than average, but surely not that much bigger…he was dead wrong. She felt rather intimidated by his size, he was rather large but that didn’t stop her from wondering what it might feel like to have him inside of her, however. While she was busy looking her fill, Bucky snuck one of his hands in between them to grasp himself. He shuddered at the feeling of his own hand around his aching cock as he stroked himself a couple of times and was surprised when Stevie let out a soft moan in response, unable to look away from him touching himself.

“Don’t come,” She whispered, voice a breathy whisper as she lifted herself up onto her knees a bit more, trailing one of her hands up along her thigh to skate the tips of her fingers along her milky flesh…before they slipped between her legs.

Bucky grunted, gripping the base of his shaft as he watched her start to touch herself. She didn’t seem to be working towards anything, just enjoying the familiar touch of her own hand on her body. Bucky breathed out shakily as he watched her other hand leave his stomach to caress up over her belly to cup and squeeze at her left breast. He slowly loosened his grip on his cock and smeared the copious amount of pre-come that had gathered there over the sensitive head.

When he shuddered hard, Stevie rubbed at her clit, gasping sharply at the sensation of almost too-much. “What do you want, pretty…” Bucky whispered. “If you don’t want me to come?”

She trembled beneath his piercing gaze, not for the first time wishing that she could see the true colour of his gorgeous eyes. He’d told her once that _they’re not anything special, just blue, but not blue like yours, not even close._ She’d asked him what he’d meant by that, but realized it didn’t really matter, not when she wasn’t sure if she understood what blue really was in the first place except another dark shade in her grey world. 

“What do I want?” She murmured. “I already have what I want,” She admitted, her left hand leaving her breast to gently caress over his stomach as the other gently worked itself between her legs, working her up slowly.

Bucky _hmmm’d_ at her reply, but shook his head gently. “Tell me what you want, sugar and I’ll give it to you,” He coerced, the knuckles of his free hand skimming up the inside of her thigh teasingly.

She shivered at the barely there contact, biting her lower lip as she let herself think about it. Truthfully, she already knew what she wanted, something she’d always wanted but never dared try to reach for. She licked her lips, the hand between her legs slipping away to gently curl over his as he stroked himself. He stilled almost instantly, shivering as she nudged his hand away to replace it with one of her own.

“What I want…” She whispered, slowly dragging her hand along the length of his cock and ignored the slight sting of her scraped palm as she stroked him slow, grip turning tight, marvelling at the grunt that escaped him as she did so. “Is to sit on your cock and ride you until you come _shouting_ my name.”

Bucky made a positively _wounded_ noise at her confession and the full body shudder he gave at her words had her smirking deviously down at him as she tipped her head forward, a curtain of curls surrounding her features and making her look so goddamn _hungry_ for him.

“Oh, God, _Stevie-_“ He choked, hands grasping at her hips with a bruising force that made her gasp.

“Y-you like that idea?” She asked breathlessly, stroking him a little faster and making him writhe.

“_Fuck, _**_yes,_**” He blurted. “But a-are you sure?” He asked roughly. “What about your asthma and we don’t have any prophylactics-“

She laughed, her own voice breathless, but there wasn’t a hint of a wheeze whatsoever, hadn’t been one since they started, which was a miracle in and of itself. “_My asthma_ he says,” Eyes rolling as she slipped her thumb over the crown of his cock, making his lashes flutter closed in a moment of blissful agony_._ “I’m fine, Buck and…and I don’t need no prophylactic, can’t-you know I don’t b-bleed, _can’t-_“ She amended, reassuring him.

Bucky outright _moaned_ at the mere thought of being inside her without a barrier between them, all that silky slick heat wrapped up tight around his cock. He bets it would feel like heaven and hell all at once. He wondered if he’d survive this, survive _her._

“You want that, Stevie? You want me all tucked up insida’ you? Want me to paint your insides with my come, get you all wet and messy?” He breathed, voice dropping into nothing but a low husky rasp of a sound.

Stevie shuddered hard above him as she nodded, whispering _yes, yes, _**_yes._** Bucky groaned, nodding himself as he agreed, “I want it, want to be inside you, want to feel you clutchin’ at me like you did my fingers.”

She moaned softly, the tips of her fingers dragging teasingly over the sensitive head of his cock before she was lifting up even more onto her knees and tugging his cock upright. Bucky swore colourfully as he tried to keep still as she guided herself over the head of his cock. He could feel her shaking as she moved, her grasp sure but hand trembling around him.

“I want it, I want it too, Bucky. Want _you,_” She breathed, trembling even harder as his large warm hands caressed up her sides and back down over her hips almost restlessly.

“You’ve got me, sugar, you’ve got me for as long as you’ll have me,” He assured, gaze snapping down in an instant when the head of his cock brushed up against her soft pubic hair.

She was biting her lower lip hard as she shifted closer, slowly lowering her hips as the head of his cock slipped against her folds. She didn’t speak, nor did he as she slowly tipped his cock towards her opening and then Bucky’s hand was there, steadying the base of his cock for her so she didn’t have to.

Her breath seemed to be practically _punched_ from her lungs in the next instant as the head started pressing inside inexorable and it was slow and hot and Bucky thought he was downright going to _suffocate_ with the way her body was clenching around him from the get-go. He thought he might be moaning or-or _something_, but it turned out he was just panting, _chuffing_ like a racehorse and _she _was the one moaning.

“Slow, _slow-_“ He urged, worried she might unintentionally hurt herself if she tried to take too much at once.

Now she no longer having to hold his cock steady as she started to slip down over him, taking more and more of his not inconsiderable length into the tight clutch of her body. His hands slipped to her hips after a moment to clutch at her hard once more, and it was so, _so good._

“T-that’s it, baby doll, nice’n slow,” He breathed, voice strained and when she was nearly half way inside of her, she quickly tensed up, breath going shallow and damn it, _now_ there was a slight wheeze.

“Sh, _shh,_” He soothed, shifting the barest amount inside if her as he pulled himself up into a sitting position.

She _moaned _and that hint of a wheeze was right there beneath it. “Just relax for a second, sweetheart. Slow breath in and let it out,” He murmured, hands skating up her sides and around to her back in an attempt to soothe her.

She was no longer trying to take more of him, instead remaining shakily propped up on her knees above him, her hands now clutching his shoulders desperately in an attempt to ground her. “S’ okay, doll. Just breathe with me for a minute, relax and let me in, no rush, pretty, no rush.”

She shuddered, one of her hands coming up to cover his mouth and effectively stopping him from talking. “Sh-shut up for a second,” She huffed, unable to keep the amusement from her voice, even with the underlying wheeze to her words. “You t-talk t-too much.”

Bucky smiled against the palm of her hand, unable to help himself. He nodded and pressed a kiss to her scuffed skin before her hand slipped away to wind through his mess of hair while the other remained curled over his shoulder. He let himself simply look at her, his broad hands splaying over her upper back and feeling the life in her as she settled more and more, her breathing slowing, chest rising and falling steadily now instead of quick and hurried as it had started to become.

He hummed softly and leaned in to press a kiss to her spit-slick lips, swollen and absurdly pink now that she’d been practically _gnawing_ at them. “I’m good,” She breathed, no wheeze whatsoever and Bucky exhaled, long and loud.

It made her chuckle a little and he smiled at her, watching as her shoulders dropped as she relaxed a little more…and at the same time, he felt her body start to give way to him as she shifted down just that much more.

They both moaned, her head tipping back as she looked up to the ceiling, his cock making a space for itself all tucked up inside of her just like she wanted. She shuddered hard as one of his big hands swept around to her backside and gently pressed down, coaxing her to take more of him in. “Oh, _oh-_“ She suddenly gasped, pelvis _finally_ coming flush with his all in a rush.

“_Christ,_ you’re fuckin’ tight,” He choked.

She whimpered, head lolling forward to look at him with lust blown eyes and those bright pink cheeks. “And you’re t-too goddamn _big-_“ She moaned, breath hitching and making Bucky worry just a bit.

“_Stevie,_ but…but you’re takin’ me so _good,_ lookit’, you’ve got me all up inside you,” He grunted, when in the next second he _ground_ up into her as if for emphasis.

She whined and clenched up around him, making him curse and wind his other hand in her long curls, tugging her into a fierce kiss as she started rocking her hips over him. “_Bucky-_“ She whimpered into his mouth, the brunet slipping his tongue past her parted lips the moment she said his name, licking inside her warmth, eager for more, more of her, more of everything she had to offer him.

“I’m here, sweetheart, I’m here,” He whispered between eager kisses.

It didn’t take long for her to find a rhythm, rocking forwards and then up and back and every time he felt his cock-head drag against the upper wall of her pussy, she let out a sweet little whimper that had his arousal spiking. He wasn’t sure how long he could last like this, he desperately wanted to take over, roll them over and press her into the mattress. But that’s not what she wanted and really, this was too good for him to pass up, seeing her above him, milky skin glistening with sweat, pink cheeks and hair a right disaster.

He broke their kiss a moment later and slowly lowered himself back down to the mattress wanting to see more of her. His hands returned to he little hips as he urged her up a bit higher this time. She gasped, gaze snapping down to him as he reclined back onto the bed. “That’s it, Stevie, I’m gonna’ help you ride me, just like you wanted, yeah?”

She shivered and nodded, letting him guide her into a faster rhythm while also lifting her up on his cock by the hips so that she came back down even harder with her next movement. “_Ah-ah_“ She gasped, lashes fluttering, her big blue eyes closing as she tried to lift herself up just that much higher on shaky legs.

When she came back down, she hadn’t expected Bucky to suddenly thrust _up_ into her. She cried out, her head tipping back, hands snapping to his chest as she braced herself over him. Bucky cursed lowly and shifted, bracing his feet on the mattress as he hiked his knees up to do it again.

“_Ah,_ fuck _yes-_“ She hissed, nails digging little crescents into the flushed skin of his chest and he grunted at the sting, feeling her slick heat tightening around him, clenching almost rhythmically as he fucked up into her, perhaps a little rougher than he should.

“That good, sugar?” He asked, voice strained and deep, deeper than he’d ever heard himself sound.

She shuddered above him and nodded, looking more like a doll just then as he started thrusting up into her welcoming body, her slick dripping out of her and making a mess of his pubic hair. It was too good though and he knew he couldn’t last. “You’re gonna’ make me come, pretty. Gonna’ come so hard in you. You’re so goddamn _tight_, your body just _begging_ me to come inside you.”

She whined desperately at that, gasping and hissing, _yes, yes, yes_ as he met her eager movements with thrust after powerful thrust, thighs tensing, muscles bunching as he worked. “W-want you to come inside me, Buck. _Please, _I want to feel it, feel you-feel you _drippin’ _outta’ me,” She begged.

He groaned, desperately wanting that, wanting to feel it, see it, _God_, but he was so close he could practically _taste it._ He picked up the pace, she quickly doing her best to meet him and keep up. Her breathing was laboured, much too laboured and he didn’t want her to wear herself thin and have an attack. He grunted as her nails dug in to his chest and then scratched him, just lightly. It made him hiss and twist beneath her and he realized he needed her to feel just as good as she was making him feel.

“C’mon, Stevie, want you to come on my cock, want you to feel good too. You want that? Want to come with me?” He asked, voice a husky rasp as he slipped a hand from her hip to slide his thumb against her clit.

She reacted instantly and near violently, crying out and snapping her head up as he started viciously attacking her clit, snapping his hips up over and over again, burying himself in her slick heat and praying he’d never have to live without this, without _her._

It didn’t take long before she was whimpering near constantly, hips jerking, no rhythm to her movements and even his were becoming sloppy, shallow thrusts and a dirty grind bringing him closer and closer to that glorious edge. He could tell she was right there with him and he moanedunabashedly as what felt like lightning started to race up into his core, cock twitching, no doubt _drooling_ pre-come inside of her as he neared the edge.

“Bucky, Bucky, _Bucky-_“ She gasped, grinding her hips down onto him, her pussy positively _aching_ to be filled with his come; she needed it so bad, it _hurt._

“Yeah, Stevie, I-I’m right there too, sweetheart,” He admitted, words no more than a harsh breath as he kept snapping his hips, kept rubbing her clit in tight little circles, that tiny pleasure centre sending heat flooding through every inch of her.

She was tensing near constantly, entire body going taught with her impending orgasm and Bucky groaned, long and low, feeling his balls tighten that much more, his cock grow that much harder and that was it, he was done for, because she was coming on his cock, the tightness of her body overwhelming in its intensity, the molten heat of her, her body clenching around him, _milking_ his orgasm from him in the next second.

“Oh-oh-_oh-_“ She whimpered, her head tipping forward and her mess of blonde curls framing her features.

Her lips were so pink and parted, face slack in her pleasure and Bucky moaned out her name like a prayer, lost in his own pleasure as he came deep inside of her, hips jerking and stilling as he spilled his release deep into her willing body.

“Stevie,” He breathed after a moment, shaking apart beneath her.

She near collapsed on top of him and he was there to catch her, the hand trapped between them worming its way out to tangle in her hair and pull her in for more kisses, uncoordinated as they were, neither seemed to much care. They kissed slowly, both still shaking and twitching as they started to settle, their breathing slowly returning to something that resembled normal.

Bucky could feel her heartbeat against his chest, still its unsteady beat and he breathed out deeply in an attempt to calm his own racing heart. He had both hands tangled in her golden hair now, caressing, soothing her as he pressed kiss after kiss to her sweet lips while her hands petted at what she could reach of his chest, both having been half pinned between their bodies when she came down on top of him.

Neither spoke for what felt like ages, maybe too afraid to break the comfortable quiet that had grown between them as they touched one another. It wasn’t until his softened cock slipped from the warmth of her body that she whimpered and he breathed quietly into her curls. “Sorry, sweetheart…just a sec, I got you,” He whispered, carefully shifting to roll them to the side.

She let him move her, making a soft sound in her throat before he settled her onto her back, careful as ever. He was always so careful with her and as he slowly followed her over, kneeling down over her, mindful to keep his weight off of her, he was still just as careful.

He let his gaze flit over her, cataloguing her body, making sure he hadn’t hurt her, that she was okay. She had pink handprints on her hips and he swallowed hard, trying not to feel too guilty about it. Her cheeks were still sporting spots of hectic colour, bandage still in tact, thankfully. Her hair was a bit of a disaster, but he figured so was his so what did it matter. Her lips were still that pretty pink and her eyes were still as bright as ever and trained right on him.

He smiled down at her, warm and loving and then leaned in closer, nuzzling his nose against hers just the barest amount, lips brushing lightly against hers. “I love you, Stevie…so, _so much,_” He breathed, voice just above that of a whisper.

She shivered beneath him, one of his hands ghosting along her side. “I love you too, Buck…more than you could ever know.”

The quiet came over them again, only the sounds of their steady breaths filling the space for a long moment. Bucky could feel her shifting minutely and he knew she must be a tad uncomfortable with his come still inside her, so he told her he’d be right back and slipped off the bed, placing a quick kiss to her lips before he went into the bathroom to get a wet cloth to clean her up.

He grabbed a fresh one from the cupboard and let the water run for a moment to warm up and was soon back in the bedroom. Stevie was sitting up in bed now, her sheet draped over her and clutched in her hand held against her chest. She was blushing fiercely and he couldn’t help smiling at her a little sheepishly as he stepped over to the bed, still as naked as the day he was born.

“Brought you a cloth,” He murmured, offering it to her as he approached the bed.

She huffed, still blushing terribly, but took it all the same. He averted his gaze when she shifted to the far side of the bed to swing her legs down onto the floor. She didn’t get up, however, and Bucky could see movement out of the corner of his eye and knew she was probably cleaning herself up a bit. He left her to it and disappeared back into the bathroom to wash up himself. He was a little surprised when he caught movement in the mirror above the sink after he’d finished washing his hands, however.

He looked up and caught her gaze as she stood in the doorway, leaning against the doorjamb with a much too open expression on her pretty face. Stevie never let her guard down, not even around him. He didn’t know what to make of the look she was currently giving him, though, so he turned around slowly to face her…and watched a tear slip from the corner of one pretty blue eye.

“_Stevie-_“ He whispered, shocked, because…because Stevie didn’t _cry._

“I’m sorry, Buck,” She gasped, voice choked with emotion and Bucky quickly wrapped his arms around her, drawing her little body in tight against his.

“Sorry? What on _Earth_ do you got to be sorry for, sweetheart?” He queried, smoothing his hands up and down her back, up into her hair almost restlessly.

“For cryin’ of course,” She spluttered and Bucky grimaced, shaking his head and pulling back a little to get a proper look at her.

“You don’t gotta’ be sorry for cryin’, pretty,” He consoled. “What’s got you so upset that you’re cryin’ in the first place? Did I hurt you? What’s wrong?”

She shook her head, much too quickly. He hadn’t hurt her, not really, she was tender _sure,_ but no, that wasn’t it at all. Bucky hushed her when her breath hitched, more tears escaping. “I-“ She grimaced, trying to find the right words and then just gave in, blurting it all out in a rush. “Y-you’re leavin’ tomorrow and you’re goin’ where I can’t follow and it isn’t fair, Buck, it ain’t _fair-_“ She gasped, delicate hands curling into fists against his chest.

Bucky’s eyes drifted shut, the pain, the longing and desperation in her voice tugging at his heart in a way he could not escape. “Shhh, _shhh_,” He urged, burying his face against her temple and pressing tender kisses there. “I know, Stevie, I do, believe me, _I do_,” He confessed, his own voice turning rough and choked. “It’s gonna’ be okay, you gotta’ trust me, Stevie, it’s goin’ to be okay.”

This only seemed to rile her up more and she shook her head fiercely, fists bumping against his chest as if she wanted to _pound_ them against it instead. “You don’t know that! You don’t know it will! Don’t stand here and _lie to me-_“

“Stevie, _please-_“ He begged, grasping her upper arms and stilling her, wanting to give her a shake. “Just give me this, let us _have this._ Just this once if that’s all it’s meant to be. If it’s all it’s ever meant to be, just _be_…here with me, Stevie…_please, _just-don’t fight me on this…n-not tonight, not when I-“

He choked on his last words and Stevie looked up at him with wide eyes, bright and glimmering with her tears. “I’m sorry, Buck, I’m so sorry. You’re right, you’re right,” She gasped, clutching at him and dragging him down to capture his lips in a kiss.

He could taste her tears on her lips as he kissed her back fiercely, dragging her back to the bed. He laid her out again, lowering himself down between her legs as she parted them to let him press in close. They kissed and touched, both mapping out each other as much as they could, shaking, tears on their cheeks and on their lips that neither wished to bring attention to right then.

They spent near on an hour like that together and at least an hour before wrapped up in one another’s arms, safe in each other’s embraces. The dinner hour was approaching and they still had those tickets for the expo and Bucky…Bucky was going to take his best girl, _his Stevie_ to the expo to see this famed flying car everyone was up in a tizzy about and they were going to enjoy seeing it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How'd I do? n_n


	4. Chapter 4

Stevie was standing at the kitchen table staring down at her sketchbook, her book bag open in front of her. Bucky was straightening himself up in the bathroom and while she’d been left to do the same in the bedroom, she’d had a thought and came out to find her book.

Her fingertips ghosted over the opened page and then she turned it to the drawing she’d slipped between the back pages of the book. She pulled out the smaller slip of paper and held it carefully in her hands, eyes raising to the doorway of her bedroom where Bucky was now looking at her. She was freshly dressed, back in his uniform, his hair all neat and tidy, cap held in his strong hands…hands that had held her, touched her, pleasured her. She swallowed hard at the thought and held out the paper towards him.

He didn’t move at first, though he could see she wanted him to come and claim the piece of paper. He knew it would be the portrait he asked of her, but he just wanted to look at her a little while longer while he was still able to. She was only wearing her button down shirt and underwear at the moment, not having finished dressing quite yet, never really having started. She hadn’t wrapped herself in her bandages either, nor bothered doing up any of her shirt buttons. Her hair was still a bit of a mess and he gave her a timid smile as he walked towards her, ignoring her outstretched handto instead reach out and brush some of her curls back behind her ear.

They didn’t stay where he’d put them for long and it only made her huff and his smile grow fonder. His gaze slipped down to her outstretched hand and Stevie watched as he reached to take the thicker paper from between her fingers, his knuckles gently brushing against her skin and sparking goosebumps to race across her flesh. He didn’t speak for a long moment, gaze stuck on the paper, the _drawing_, she’d handed him.

“This is beautiful,” He murmured, voice quiet, soft.

Stevie looked away, her hand coming up to grasp her opposite arm, fingers curling around her bicep as she shrugged gently. “It’s nothing,” She tried to demure, but Bucky was already shaking his head, gaze flickering back up to her face.

“It’s not _nothing_,” He insisted. “This is a beautiful portrait of you, Stevie. Thank you,” He told her sincerely, his voice hoarse with emotion.

She did look back to him then. “You’re welcome,” She said simply, unable to break free from his stare.

He broke it for her, gaze straying back down to the portrait of his best friend, the woman he’d walk through hell and back for if it ever came down to it. He swallowed hard at the thought. “You kept your hair down in the picture,” Is what he told her.

She huffed a little, glancing down at the drawing of herself. She’d spent a good couple of days working on it between commissions, wanting to make sure she got every detail just right. She knew how much he liked her hair, he’d always said as much, not like it’d been a big secret or anything. He also always used to tease her about her freckles, her crooked nose too, so she’d made sure to draw them just as they were. It was the eyes she struggled with, not knowing how to express herself in the drawing she’d been going to give to him.

She’d settled on drawing them as she thought about Bucky, about how she might look if she were to let Bucky see all the love and desire she had for him reflected in her eyes. She’s glad she decided to convey them in that way. “I know how much you like my hair down, all curly and messy,” She explained quietly.

Bucky was smiling as he looked at the drawing and then carefully set it aside on the table beside them. When he returned his gaze back to his Stevie, he smiled at her adoringly and reached out to gently cup her cheeks in the palms of his hands. “I _love _your hair, Stevie, all curly and messy too, golden like the sunshine, soft like spun sugar,” He murmured, leaning in and pressing a warm kiss to her forehead.

Her lashes fluttered, eyes closing as she leaned into the soft press of his lips. “I also love _you_,” He whispered against her skin, slowly drawing back and letting his hands slip down to her shoulders.

Stevie’s next breath is shaky at best as she opened her eyes to look up at him. “I love you too, Bucky,” It was all she could bring herself to say right then.

He leaned in and pressed his lips chastely to hers. They stood in the kitchen for another minute or so, Bucky glancing down at the portrait before he carefully picked it up and folded it neatly in half, slipping it into the breast pocket of his coat to keep it safe. Stevie had turned away to put her sketchbook back and tried not to think about it for a little while; the reason why he’d needed the portrait in the first place.

“You going to get dressed?” Bucky asked lightly, placing a warm hand on her left hip.

She nodded, still looking down at her book as she slipped it into her bag. “Yeah, guess I should,” She agreed.

He hummed softly as she slipped out from beneath his grasp and headed back towards the bedroom. Bucky followed her on quiet feet and came to a stop in the doorway as she walked to where Bucky had picked up her clothes and set them on the dresser. He watched her in silence, cataloging everything he could about her, wanting to memorize every freckle, every dimple and subtle curve.

She slipped out of her shirt and reached for the bandages she’d had wrapped around her chest sitting on the dresser and Bucky shifted, clearing his throat a bit. She stilled, bandages just beneath her fingers and cast him a curious glance.

“Can you do something for me?” He asked, slipping into the room and stepping up behind her.

He felt her shiver at his closeness and gently placed both of his hands against her slim hips, nuzzling up behind her ear to simply breathe in for a moment, swearing he could smell him on her still. “Depends what it is, Buck,” She breathed.

Bucky hummed softly, inhaling the scent of her, nose brushing the back of her ear and all those big soft curls. “Go out tonight with me…as my girl?”

Stevie shuddered hard beneath his hands and Bucky’s fingers flexed against her warmth, thumbs toying with the waistband of her underwear. He was surprised when she suddenly turned around in his arms and looked up at him, her expression open, but nervous.

“You wound want me to?” She asked quietly, unsure.

He nodded, caressing her hair lightly as he looked into her face, gazed into her bright eyes. “Yeah, but only if you want to. You don’t need to cover up, not with me…”

She swallowed hard, gaze flickering away to the side. “Suppose you want me to wear my hair down too, don’t you?”

Bucky chuckled softly, rolling his eyes. “Only if you want to, you don’t gotta’.”

Stevie was smiling softly as she shifted out of his space, turning back to her dresser. He watched as she started rifling through her drawers-still half-naked so it wasn’t as if he was going to look away-pulling out an undershirt and a new pair of trousers, a fresh shirt too. He gave her some space and went to sit at the foot of the bed to let her get dressed, knowing if he kept standing so close, he may just not let her. Be a right distraction he would.

She pulled on her undershirt and then her button-down, doing up the buttons deftly and then tugging on her trousers. She fed her belt through the loops a moment later and swiftly buckled it closed after she’d tucked her shirt in. He kept watching as she sat down on the chair in the corner, avoiding his gaze as she pulled on her socks and then stood up. She picked up her suspenders and brought them quietly over to Bucky, looking up through her lashes at him as she came to a stop just in front of him.

“Can I still wear these?” She asked quietly, showing him the suspenders.

He smiled at her crookedly. “Stevie, you can wear whatever you want, doll. I just don’t want you to hide yourself, not when you don’t need to,” He admitted, taking the suspenders from her and helping her clip them into place.

She was smiling as she slipped her arms into them and Bucky smiled right back. She knew he’d never ask her to change herself and truthfully, she liked wearing men’s clothing. She thought she’d feel too naked if she every decided to wear a dress. She didn’t even own any dresses, not of her own. She did have one dress though, and it had belonged to her mother; a cornflower blue day-dress, her mother had told her. It had been one of her favourites and she could not bear to part with it after she passed.

She disappeared a moment later into the bathroom to wash up and Bucky took the moment alone to pull out something he’d brought along for her from his breast pocket. He wasn’t sure when the right time would be to give it to her, but he figured now was a good a time as any.

When she came out of the bathroom a couple minutes later, Bucky’s gaze slipped down to the way she’d undone the top button of her shirt and folded back the lapels to show a little of her collarbone. He swallowed thickly at the sight and let his gaze travel up to her face, noting she’d pulled her hair back into a low ponytail, an elastic holding it in place.

“Just to keep it out of my face,” She explained and Bucky smiled, shaking his head.

“Don’t need to explain yourself to me, pretty,” He told her, beckoning her forward.

She smiled softly at him, pleased, and walked towards him and then caught sight of his hand that was wrapped around a small parcel tied with a ribbon. Bucky saw her looking and reached out to take her hand gently in his. “I got you something to…” _Say goodbye_, they both mentally finished.

She swallowed hard, gaze flitting between his eyes and the item he was now pressing into her hand. “It’s a sketchbook,” Bucky went on after a moment.

She was staring down at it with bright eyes that were suddenly filled with tears. She’d undone the ribbon that had been tied around it and breathed out roughly through her nose when she caught sight of the leather envelope and inside was one of the nicest sketchbooks she’d ever seen. It was black with dozens and dozens of blank cream pages just waiting for her to fill. She looked up into Bucky’s face then to see the answering softness in his eyes.

“Thank you, Bucky. This is the nicest gift…I-” She barely dared to whisper, now clutching the leather envelope and sketchbook to her chest, unable to finish whatever she’d meant to say.

“You’re welcome, Stevie,” He murmured, gaze slowly slipping down to where the navy blue ribbon he’d used to wrap the present with was slipping through her long slender fingers.

He plucked it from her grasp and leaned in to press a kiss to her right cheek. “Let me put this in your hair?”

She glanced down at where he had the ribbon wrapped around a couple of his fingers and then gave him this _look._ “You’re really pushin’ your luck there, pal.”

Bucky grinned at her, pulling back and scrunching up his nose a little. She rolled her eyes at his response and carefully tucked the sketchbook back into its holder, closing it safely and setting it down on the bed. Then she took the ribbon from his hands and marched off into the bathroom without another word.

When they arrived together at the Stark Expo less than an hour later, the little blue ribbon was tied in a perfectly neat bow in her hair…and Bucky’s fingers somehow kept finding it, and her curls…to play with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is as far as I've gotten so far, but I've got plans I tell you, so many plans. xD
> 
> [ko-fiandfanfiction](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/ko-fiandfanfiction)


	5. Chapter 5

“So, flying cars?” Bucky asked, a hint of mirth in his voice as he tugged Stevie into his side.

Stevie huffed, rolling her eyes as she let herself be tugged in close. “Maybe in a few more years, Buck. Did you see the smoke comin’ outta’ that thing?”

Bucky grinned, shaking his head as he laughed. “Did I ever, _hey_, you wanna’ go get some popcorn or somethin’? I gotta’ use the bathroom, but I’ll meet you back here if you want?”

Stevie nodded, smiling a little. This really did feel like a real date. “Sure, Buck. I’ll meet you back here in ten? I saw the line earlier and it looked a bit long.”

Bucky hummed, glancing down at her pink cheeks and bright eyes, gaze slipping a little lower to the bit of pale skin she was showing at her throat. “Sounds good, Stevie. Here, I’ve got a nickel-“

“I can buy it, Buck,” She huffed, interrupting him and rolling her eyes yet again.

She shoved at him gently and Bucky rolled his eyes too, but it was all fond. He watched her turn away and give him a little wave before she headed off towards the food vendors that had setup shop. He sighed, watching as she lost herself in the crowd, not that it took much, before he turned and headed for the bathrooms.

Stevie sighed as she fought her way through the crowd of people, slipping in between the _cracks_ as it were as she attempted to find the popcorn vendor she’d seen earlier. She was jostled back and forth a bit but tried to keep her bony elbows to herself as she picked her way through the throng of people. But then she caught sight of a couple of army officers standing by a doorway off to the right. There were posters displayed there, advertising war bonds and a chance to help the cause, fight for your country…

Stevie was already walking towards them before her brain had caught up to her feet. The two soldiers were smiling and chatting animatedly with a couple of young women, attention solely focused on them and it was easy to slip unnoticed behind them and through the open doorway.

The hallway was quiet beyond the doorway and she shifted uncomfortably as she looked back over her shoulder. The noise from the expo was loud behind her and she frowned, turning her attention back to the empty hallway. It was just any old hallway, really, but there were a number of posters pinned up along the walls, eerily similar to some of the ones she had herself designed. She huffed and took a few steps further along.

She really didn’t know why she was back here, why she wanted to see…whatever it was that happened at an army recruitment centre. She just felt drawn to it, drawn to the cause, the fight…not that this was the first time she’d tried to get closer to a recruitment centre, far from it actually.

She swallowed hard when she heard voices up ahead and listened as she approached an open doorway where she could hear men’s voices talking quietly. They were too low for her to hear properly from here, so she stepped up beside the door in an attempt to hear them better.

“You’ll be fighting for your country, young man. That kind of service will be recognized and you should be proud of yourself for taking this step. The war needs brave men and your time in basic will be well spent-“

“Can I help you?” Came a gentle voice and Stevie jumped, clearly startled.

An older greying gentleman with large spectacles stood behind her and she whipped around in surprise, her small fists raised. She hadn’t even heard him approach. She frowned, lowering her hands when she realized her raised fists were clearly not going to be necessary against such an older man. “_Sorry-_“ She quickly apologized, taking a step back from him and subsequently the open doorway. “I was just-“

The bespectacled man was still watching her quietly, curiously. “_Eavesdropping?_” He filled in, a slight quirk to his lips.

She huffed, pale cheeks flushing lightly as she folded her arms in front of her narrow chest. “I wasn’t…okay I_ was_, but I wasn’t doing anything incriminating-“

“Would you come with me for a moment?” He asked suddenly, already turning towards another doorway.

Stevie watched as he pushed it open and then motioned her inside. She hesitated, brow furrowed in confusion. “I’m not in…trouble or anything, am I?”

The older man smiled kindly and shook his head. “Of course not. I only wanted to have a word,” He explained patiently, watching her quietly, gaze never leaving hers.

She glanced back over her shoulder towards the expo. Ten-minutes…she could…she would be back in ten-minutes. She nodded, attention back on the older man before her. He smiled at her kindly and motioned her into the room…she went.

.

“Would you care for a drink, Miss…?”

She cleared her throat slightly. “Rogers…and uh…no, thank you, Sir.”

The older man hummed, nodding as he sat down on the edge of a desk and Stevie took a moment to look around the room. It was a simple office, not exactly anything out of the ordinary. She turned her attention back to the man as he leaned back against the desk but made no move towards the sideboard where a couple of decanters sat for a drink for himself.

“How are you enjoying the expo, Miss Rogers?” He asked her honestly.

She shifted, perching herself on the armrest of a small sofa in the room a few feet away from him. “It’s um, pretty great,” She admitted. “First time I’ve been to a Stark Expo, actually.”

The man hummed, nodding in agreement. “Mr. Stark is quite the inventor, no?”

Stevie smiled a little wryly at that. “Yeah, uh…the flying car sounded pretty neat…”

“But not so neat in person,” The man chuckled, making Stevie smile in return.

“Maybe in another few years,” She agreed, nose scrunching up a bit at the thought. “Um…I didn’t get your name…”

“Doctor Erskine,” He introduced and Stevie blew out a slow breath, nodding.

“Right…so um…what did you want to talk about?” She said uncertainly, glancing back towards the door.

It had remained open, but partially closed for the moment, Stevie appreciated that at least. “_Truthfully?_ I wanted to know what a young woman such as yourself was doing sneaking around by the army recruitment office when she might be better off out there enjoying her evening.”

Stevie swallowed hard, gaze shifting over to the sideboard for something else to look at. She shrugged a little. “I was just curious,” She explained.

“Just curious?” Dr. Erskine prodded, raising a brow in question. “Curious about what, exactly?”

Stevie huffed, shoulders hunching in slightly as she looked down at her hands and the delicate bones of her wrist as her long fingers slipped around it gently. “Well, I-“ She shook her head, face scrunching up uncomfortably before she looked up at the Doctor.

She was going to tell him it was none of his business, that it didn’t matter and she’d better get going, but something stopped her. There was something in his eyes, a kindness, an understanding and…she had no idea where it was coming from, but suddenly she just wanted to spout everything to him. Never mind that she’d never told _anyone_ other than Bucky about her desire to fight with the rest of them. She somehow felt this man would understand her.

“I want to help,” She breathed, brows pinching up as she straightened her posture, as much as her poor back would let her. “I want to fight and do my part like every one else.”

“And why can’t you?” He asked her, voice steady, no judgement, just wanting to understand, to hear her say it.

Stevie shook her head, a self-deprecating laugh escaping her. “My body, for one. I’ve got a list of medical ailments a mile long. My heart don’t work right, neither do my lungs. I’ve got scoliosis and I’m colourblind and _hell,_ I’m near deaf in my one ear,” She admitted, a pinched expression on her face.

The Doctor hummed thoughtfully, hands clasped in his lap as he regarded her, but he didn’t speak. “And I _don’t care_ if my body quits on me if I’m on the front lines, I don’t-“ She admitted, frowning slightly. “I just want to help and I…I can’t even _try_ because I’m-because I’m a-“

“A woman,” The Doctor murmured quietly.

Stevie grimaced, nodding as she dragged a frustrated hand over her face, shutting her eyes as she attempted to find some semblance of control. “I want to do my part and I can’t. I don’t like bullies, I don’t care where they’re from. This could be my chance to stand up to the worst kind and finally make a _difference_,” She stressed. “I don’t want to sit idly by when I could be _doing _**_something_**.”

“Is that what you want? To do something?” He asked frankly.

“_Yes-_“ She breathed emphatically, her bright blue eyes meeting his with a fire behind them he seemed to understand all too well. “More than anything.”

He stood then and when he approached her, he removed a small card from his breast pocket and offered it to her. She stared up at the offered card in confusion for a moment and then tentatively took it.

“I’d like for you to meet me tomorrow morning, Miss Rogers. There’s an address on that card, see that you’re there by 9am…you’ll need to pack your bags for the trip, I’m afraid,” He explained, letting go once she’d taken the card.

She blinked up at him in obvious confusion. “What?”

He smiled at her, not unkindly and headed for the door, opening it fully. “I have a proposition for you and if you truly do want to become a part of the force to stop the war…I think you’ll be interested.”

She swallowed hard, slowly getting to her feet. “Is this some kind of joke?”

He shook his head. “It is not, Miss Rogers. I’ve been working on something with Mr. Stark for quite some time…and I think I would like to give you a chance to prove yourself to be the valuable part of this project we’ve been looking for.”

Her brain was stuck on _Mr. Stark_, admitting the fact that they somehow knew each other and were working on something-something that could maybe stop the war by the sounds of it, end it for good and they needed perhaps _her_ to be a part of it? It was enough to have her nodding.

“I’ll be there at 9am,” She agreed, tone sure, adamant.

He nodding slowly and motioned her towards the door. “Our dislike of bullies, Miss Rogers…is a mutual thing,” He admitted, watching as she passed.

She could do nothing save for agree with a quiet murmur before bidding each other a good evening. It wasn’t until she was pocketing the card and looking back over her shoulder at the Doctor, that she wondered just what in the hell she’d gotten herself into.

.

“Where’s the popcorn?” Bucky asked her curiously.

Stevie looked up at him, too stunned to even speak for a moment. “Stevie?” He asked worriedly. “Everything alright?”

She swallowed hard and then nodded quickly, shaking herself out of her stupor. “Y-yeah, sorry, Buck. They were all out, but I think I saw a cotton candy booth. Want to try some of that?”

“Sure, Stevie,” Bucky murmured, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of her head and Stevie blushed lightly and pushed at his chest.

He laughed lightly and slung his arm around her shoulders, drawing her lithe body close. “Ugh, would you quit it, Buck?” She joked, still smiling lightly despite him being all sweet on her

Bucky grinned and started to lead her over to the cotton candy machines. “No way, doll. You like it,” He teased.

“Do _not-_“ She countered, rolling her eyes when he only held her even tighter, closer.

She did and they both knew it and if while they were enjoying their spun sugar, walking around the expo and Stevie felt eyes on her…_well_, she simply chalked it up to all the people around them who must be looking at Bucky…she was just getting caught in the crossfire, so to speak.

.

Later that night while Stevie curled up, half draped over Bucky’s naked chest while naked herself, her mind drifted back to the strange meeting she’d had at the Stark Expo. Dr. Erskine…she’d never heard of him before, surprising when you really thought about it. Stevie thought she knew all the doctors in the city. She rolled her eyes at the thought and shifted, propping her chin up on Bucky’s left pec, feeling the steady rise and fall of his warm chest beneath her.

They’d left the expo not long after they’d finished their spun sugar and headed back to the apartment. Bucky had started getting rather handsy and well, being in public wasn’t such a great idea if he was going to continue to try and cop a feel every two-minutes. Stevie kept putting up a token protest, but really, it wasn’t all that much of one. They’d stumbled back into her apartment and soon they’d fallen into bed together once again.

The way he took her apart was mind-numbingly beautiful and she knew she’d never forget it so long as she breathed. She swallowed hard, looking up into his peaceful face, lax with sleep and soft, so soft. She swallowed hard and reached up to caress his cheek, her thumb brushing lightly over his lips, feeling their pillowy softness beneath the pad of her thumb. Bucky’s breath continued to come even and deep and Stevie envied him for it.

Her long lashes fluttered as she turned her head, pressing her ear to his chest, both hearing and feeling the steady beat of his heart. Her next breath in was shaky as she pressed a kiss to his warm skin, eyes shutting tightly as she tried to just hold on to this for a while longer. But it was late and soon the sun would start to rise and Bucky would get up, dress in his army blues and just…_leave._ Her face contorted at the thought and she found herself wrapping her arms tightly about his middle, holding on as tight as she dared.

Her breathing was hitching uncomfortably and soon she let the tears come when she’d felt Bucky’s strong arms carefully slip around her, his concerned yet raspy voice in her ear, the brush of his plush lips against her temple, her damp cheeks, her bitten lips. He whispered soft assurances against her lips, against her skin, against her mess of curls. She couldn’t hear everything he said, but she caught the most important of it all and she whispered back with her own choked voice. She didn’t remember falling asleep, but she knew she must have, because the next time she woke, she was alone in her apartment, the morning sun barely filtering in through the window of her bedroom and no trace of Bucky to be found.

But that wasn’t entirely true, Stevie just refused to acknowledge it right that moment. Because Bucky was in everything and it wasn’t even his home. A sci-fi book on the coffee table, an old pair of suspenders on the coatrack, an old hat hung there too. There was an empty mug in the sink, a newspaper folded the wrong way on the kitchen table, all the signs of him having been there, an integral part of her every day life. Stevie closed her eyes against all of this and turned back to her dresser where she’d been putting together a small suitcase of her things.

She hadn’t planned on telling Bucky about her meeting with the Doctor, she knew what he’d say. It would be the same thing he’d said to her when she’d raged against him a few days prior about wanting to be at the front. _You’re safer here, Stevie. Please don’t go do anything stupid, you hear?_

She swallowed hard and whispered, “How can I when you’re taking all the stupid with you?”

The same reply she’d spoken then. She closed her eyes and breathed in deep through her nose. She picked up her old sketchbook from her dresser and flipped through it, unable to stop herself from looking at all of the pictures of Bucky therein. Not just Bucky, though. There were pictures she’d drawn of her mother too of course and Bucky’s family. Lots of cityscapes and even a couple of the rides at Coney Island.

She very carefully tore three of her favourite drawings from the sketchbook, folding them before she opened her present from Bucky and carefully tucked the few pages inside. She slipped her new sketchbook back into its leather envelope along with her tin of charcoals and tentatively tucked it on the inside of her coat pocket. She’d packed up a couple of little things from her mother’s belongings too and closed her suitcase before dragging it from the bed.

She looked up into the mirror above her dresser and made sure her hair was all tucked away before fixing her hat atop her head. She gave one last cursory glance around her tiny apartment, everything put away in its place, a note left on the kitchen table for her landlord. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath…and then left her apartment for the last time.


	6. Chapter 6

“What do you plan to do? Walk to Austria?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

“You heard the Colonel, your friend is most likely dead.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Even so, he’s devising a strategy. If he detects-”

“By the time he’s done that, it could be too late! You told me you thought I was meant for more than this. Did you mean that?”

“Every word.”

“Then you gotta’ let me go.”

“I can do more than that.”

.

“It’s me. It’s Stevie.”

“Stevie?”

“Come on.”

“Stevie.”

“I thought you were dead.”

“I thought you were smaller.”

“Come on.”

“What happened to you?”

“I joined the Army.”

“Did it hurt?”

“A little.”

“Is it permanent?”

“So far.”

.

Bucky is staring. To be fair, so is literally every other set of eyes surrounding them. They’d escaped the Hydra base, but barely and with the rest of the captured and newly freed unit hiding back in the tree-line and no more enemies to speak of for the time being, they’re sort of free to do so?

Stevie is breathing deep but slow as she stands in front of one of the German Panzer tanks Dugan and Falsworth had recently vacated…a good thing that too, seeing as she’d just _flipped_ the goddamn thing on its head and taken out a few stragglers. She felt too hot in her own skin, sweat having dampened the back of her neck and hair now matted against it, still mostly hidden beneath her helmet, however. She turned then, away from the flaming wreckage of the base and caught sight of Bucky standing a few feet away looking uncertain and sickly, still deathly pale, eyes sunken, cheeks hollow, but he too was still just _staring_…at her. She swallowed past the lump that was trying to lodge itself in her throat and turned away from the wreckage to head towards the group gathered at the tree-line.

They needed to get out of here. It was going to be a long march back to camp and night had already fallen, thankfully not too long ago. They really needed to get a move on.

“Let’s get a move on fella’s!” She called and then started towards the back of the huddled group. “We’ve got a long march ahead, so grab what you can for supplies outta’ those trucks and let’s go! Keep an eye out!”

She didn’t look to see if Bucky was following her, she could feel his heavy gaze, his presence, not to mention hear his slightly unsteady footfalls and rapidly beating heart as he fell into step beside her. Not that she would tell him that right this second, however. She knew if she asked him if he was alright, she’d probably get a lie and Bucky…he didn’t lie to her, but somehow she knew he would. He hadn’t been alright since he got his orders and she wasn’t sure he’d ever be alright again. Best not to ask.

No one said a word against her orders, merely nodded and murmured their agreement, watching as she passed…only to quickly fall into step behind her soon after they’d fathered what supplies they could. She’d made a quick introduction back in those cells and _Christ,_ but what had she been _thinking?_

_ I’m…Captain America._ Really? She pushed it from her mind and started marching. She had a job to do.

The first wave of soldiers that had reached the tree-line had ransacked a few trucks, taking weapons, tents, food and any supplies they could find and she knew they should be able to make the walk back to camp in a little over a day’s time. They couldn’t chance taking any of the vehicles, but they did what they could with a couple of stretchers they’d found for the wounded. She’d make sure to make the rounds and see to them once they’d settled a safe distance away from the base.

Everyone was tired, hungry, some injured, but no one complained, not once about having to walk or the fact that she was apparently the only one who had come to their rescue. To be fair, she thought, they’d done a lot of the saving themselves. Quick thinking on their part too, she was a little more than impressed.

There was a lot of staring, however, and though Stevie had started to get used to it in the days prior to her taking that leap over enemy lines, this was different. It wasn’t the analytical way the scientists and doctors looked at her and it certainly wasn’t the hungry lustful stares she received while on tour with the USO girls, not even close. This was entirely different and she wasn’t sure she could maintain her calm the whole way back.

The way these men looked at her was with _Respect,_ capital _R_ and everything. Some even looked downright intimidated, though they clearly tried to hide it. What’s worse was that Bucky’s stare remained fixed solely on her. It was weighted and she knew he had a thousand and one questions for her but he remained blissfully silent beside her as they marched. She knew she’d pay for the silence later, surely. But right now it was keeping her from doing something stupid like blurting out, _I missed you so much, Buck. I’m so glad you’re okay, I’m so glad you’re alive._

She was pretty sure he could tell what she was thinking anyway. Every time they did manage to meet each others eyes for more than .02 seconds, the relief there was palpable. But neither wanted to look too closely at the other, at least, she didn’t want to, not with so many people around. But she continued to feel Bucky’s heavy gaze on her as she walked, quick sweeping glances, even some longer stares that felt as if they were burning through her poor excuse of a uniform. _Christ,_ but it wasn’t even a goddamn _proper_ uniform.

She huffed a little at the thought, glancing down at herself, at her ruined leather jacket, dirty with mud, blood and grime she really didn’t want to think about. Her red white and blue striped bodice, thankfully half hidden beneath it and more modest than the other USO girls. She’d ditched the skirt, because well, of fucking course she did. First chance she fucking got, thank you very much. The rest of her now, however, was no better off. Her commandeered trousers were worse for wear when she’d got them and, _well,_ at least her boots weren’t so bad off, just God awfully covered in…never mind, not important. She knew Bucky wasn’t exactly better off either. Casting a furtive glance to the man at her side, she took in his tattered green shirt, his threadbare trousers and his boots weren’t even done up properly, for _chrissakes. _She swallowed hard at the thought. She’d never not seen Bucky well put together and this was-this was a far cry from his usual perfectly immaculate self.

But she couldn’t think about that right now, couldn’t think about the bruises on his face, at his temple. Couldn’t think about the blood on his lip, the wounds she’d seen on his arms…injection sites-

She visibly shook her head and the movement caught the man in question’s attention. She did her best to ignore it and picked up the pace, hoping Bucky was still capable of meeting it. Thankfully, he was.

She called a halt a few hours in when she could hear the pained grunts and groans of the men around her reach a bit of a fevered pitch. They needed to rest, even if she didn’t. They were at least back in their territory now, no longer in the enemies. “Get the tents up, men. No fires, stay together, stay close and tend to one another. We’ve still got a ways to go, but we’ve got this. We pack up at dawn.”

No one argued and when she was approached by one of the men she’d first come across in those cells, she stilled, wondering if he would be the first to go against her orders. He’d jumped all over helping to get the men out of there earlier, but maybe now that he wasn’t exactly a captive, he had something to say about her leading them. She hadn’t exactly wanted to be giving orders in the first place, but it seemed as if everyone kept looking to her, so she thought she’d better step up. She was supposed to be a Captain, after all.

“Ma’am-“ He started, only to be cut off before he’d barely begun.

“_Captain_-“ Bucky corrected and Stevie looked to her friend, arching a delicate brow beneath her helmet before she turned back to the soldier in front of her.

“Captain,” The soldier corrected himself, saluting her. “We’re very grateful you came when you did, don’t know if we’d have lasted much longer in there,” He admitted.

Stevie swallowed hard, giving a sharp nod in reply. “This is Sergeant Timothy Dugan,” Bucky introduced and Stevie glanced to her friend as she nodded, turning her attention quickly back to the Sergeant.

“Pleasure to meet you, Sergeant. Stephanie Rogers, at your service,” She introduced, reaching out to shake his hand.

Dugan stared at her outstretched gloved hand, covered in dirt and blood and maybe bruised like the rest of them and Bucky watched as he seemed to fight with whether or not to shake it or kiss it, despite the grime. Bucky _really_ hoped he didn’t kiss it, lest he get a punch to the face. Something told him Dugan wasn’t quite that stupid and he was relieved when a moment later the Sergeant shook her hand firmly.

“_Captain_ Rogers,” Bucky muttered under his breath and they both glanced to him a little curiously.

“Buck-“ Stevie murmured, brows pinching up a little as their hands dropped.

“Don’t _Buck_ me, _Captain Rogers._ You have a title and _everyone_ better damn well use it,” Bucky muttered.

Her brow only raised a touch higher at that, pretty face marred with dirt and dust, caked blood high on her cheek not nearly as startling as it would be on her usually pale skin, thanks to the grime. “That how you talk to all of your superiors, Sergeant?” She asked, voice gentle, near teasing.

Bucky merely looked away in response as a few other members of their unit sidled up before them to join Dugan, who quickly realized they had a bit of an audience. “I’d like to introduce our squad, Captain Rogers. This is James Montgomery Falsworth, Gabe Jones, Jim Morita and Jaques Dernier,” The Sergeant introduced, gesturing to the men that had gathered around them.

“Honour to meet the members of the 107th,” She admitted, saluting them as they in turn saluted her.

“We owe you a great thanks,” Gabe agreed, Falsworth and the others nodding as well.

“Just doing my job, fella’s,” She admitted, nodding to them sharply.

A few of them glanced to where Bucky was standing and Gabe cleared his throat a bit. “Good to see you, Barnes.”

Bucky swallowed thickly, nodding as his gaze swept over each of his men in turn. “Good to see you all too.”

Dugan picked up the conversation again, giving her information on the regiment and an inventory of the supplies they’d managed to procure. Soon enough they were walking towards where supplies were being divvied up and the injured were being tended to. She kept casting quiet glances over her shoulder to where Bucky had wandered to the edge of their little band and Dugan did not fail to notice.

“The men have already started to set up the tents and get the food to the injured and worse off, the rest will fall in line soon enough,” He explained.

“Good, and what about watch? Have you any volunteers yet? I can offer my services-”

“Several, we’ve got it covered for the night, Captain. There’s no need for you to take watch,” Dugan explained.

Stevie swallowed hard and nodded. “Fair enough, you let me know if that changes. I don’t know how much sleeping I’ll be doing,” She admitted.

Dugan huffed and nodded, glancing back towards where the tents were being staked out. “I’ll see about getting your quarters set up-“

“That’s really not neces-“

“It is, _Captain,_” Dugan stressed, his hand raising as if to touch her shoulder.

He stilled before the contact and quickly lowered his hand. Stevie watched him, swallowing thickly as she nodded. “Alright,” She agreed quietly. “Alright.”

He nodded at her and turned, disappearing into the group and Stevie was left standing there for a moment, looking around at the men as they surreptitiously tried not to look at her. She nodded to those who seemed brave enough to do so, offering them reassuring smiles and calm words as she made her way back to where she’d last seen Bucky.

She inhaled shakily when she came back to find Bucky sitting at the edge of the camp on a fallen tree, dissembling his rifle with practiced movements. She couldn’t repress the little shiver she got while she watched him stripping it down.

“Hey,” She breathed, striding towards him, ignoring the watchful eyes of some of the men in her peripherals.

Bucky’s gaze remained on his task and Stevie inhaled slowly. Either Bucky was pissed or he was _really_ pissed if he was ignoring her right now. “Can we go for a walk?”

Bucky finished dissembling his rifle and shot her a pointed glance. Stevie nodded dumbly. “When you’re done then,” She conceded, moving to sit down on the fallen tree beside him to better survey the group.

Bucky didn’t say anything to that, merely started to reassemble his rifle in the near silence of the camp. It didn’t take long, but Stevie kept her hands folded in front of her while her gaze slipped over the crowd of men as they settled in for the night.

She was startled a few moments later when Bucky suddenly stood up, slinging his rifle over his shoulder and started to stalk off into the darkness. “_Buck-_“ She breathed, getting to her feet and following after him.

Bucky didn’t say anything and simply kept walking, head ducked down as he stalked through the trees. Stevie huffed, but kept up and as soon as she felt they were far enough away for fear of being heard or seen in the darkness, she reached out for Bucky’s arm, gloved fingers curling gently around him.

Bucky jerked, spinning around to face her. “I _told you_, don’t do anything stupid until I get back,” He hissed.

Stevie frowned, her hand dropping from his arm, momentarily distracted by his anger instead of the thinness of his muscle beneath his shirt. Frustration and surprise rose up inside her. “And I _told you_, how can I? When you’re takin’ all the stupid with you.”

Bucky scoffed, throwing his body back a step only to take another halting step towards her again, his clearly agitated movements only made Stevie even more concerned for him. “Bucky, I couldn’t just-“

“I _know, Stevie_-“ He nearly shouted and then seemed to remember himself, looking around them in the darkness. “_Goddamnit! _I _know,_” He stressed, quieter but no less serious.

Stevie pushed out a rough breath and took a tentative step towards her friend. He looked as if he were about to spook. “I’m better, now, Buck. Look, no more asthma, no pain…no more heart problems. I’m healthy as a horse,” She explained, eyes wide and near pleading.

Bucky shook his head, staring into her bright blue eyes and there was something about that, about being in the near blackness of their surroundings, dark like this and somehow he could _see_ her, like _really _see her. He tried not to think about it and instead focused on the fact that he didn’t have to look _down _on her for once and wasn’t that a rather startling difference?

“I can’t even _get_ sick anymore, Buck,” She admitted, a sort of wry smile on her face, ducking her head a bit to catch his gaze as it flickered away.

He wanted to look at her, he truly did. He wanted to look at her for hours, but not here, not here at the edge of enemy territory in the middle of a goddamn _war. _But it was all just…it was just so… “This is so crazy, Stevie. You have to understand that. You-you’re so _different _now.”

Stevie’s lips quirked, a wry sort of thing as she shook her head and pulled off her helmet to hold it in her hands. Her hair was still a right disaster, golden strands having come loose from her braid, face a mess of soot and dirt and blood mixed in with all that grime. She huffed, blowing a few of the fallen strands from her face.

“It is crazy,” She agreed quietly, trying to meet his gaze. “But I’m still _me,_ Bucky,” She whispered, taking a step back to lean against a big red wood.

Bucky stood there, hands falling limply to his sides as he watched her cradle her helmet in her hands, seeing her pretty face near illuminated by the moonlight coming in through the canopy of leaves above them and then Bucky _guffawed_ because- “That’s not even a real helmet, Stevie!”

She huffed, glancing down at the helmet in her hands, bringing it up to inspect it half-heartedly. “I needed _something_,” She sighed, a wry twist to her lips.

_Christ_, she really hadn’t changed nearly as much as he first thought. “What if you got hurt?” Bucky blurted, now utterly beside himself with worry. “What the hell were you _thinking?_”

She laughed a little at that. “I was thinking, I need to get to Bucky and um…he’ll kill me if I don’t come at least somewhat prepared,” She muttered, and it was supposed to be under her breath, too soft to hear, at least she hoped.

“What?” Bucky muttered, tone flat and somehow serious all at once.

Stevie blew out a slow breath. “I heal better now, apparently,” She offered instead and then sighed, shaking her head a bit. “It’s complicated, um…there was this scientist and you know Mr. Stark? Howard Stark?”

Bucky’s _still _staring at her incredulously. “Right, so…Mr. Stark and Dr.-Dr. Erskine…he created a serum and with a machine Stark built, _well_…they got me,” She explained, gesturing to herself and biting her lower lip gently, her gaze slipped away for a beat. “Now I don’t um, I can’t get sick and if I get hurt…well there were a few tests and I heal, _very_ quickly and like, good as new basically, no matter what happens to me.”

Bucky swallowed thickly at the word _tests_. “Okay,” He said simply and Stevie knew he shouldn’t be accepting this so well, but after being in that lab, seeing the things they’d just seen…she was pretty sure this wasn’t all that big a deal in comparison.

Not if it meant she was healthy and whole. “Okay,” He said again, a bit more steady.

Stevie swallowed hard and nodded slowly, her gaze sweeping over his frame from head to foot. _God,_ but he looked so different now and she knew he was probably thinking the same thing. His body was different, his face…his eyes. He’d lost all that baby softness in his cheeks. His jaw line had been sharpening before he’d gone to war, but now it was striking. Seeing him looking so thin, physically and mentally hurting from his time at war, his time in _captivity_. She didn’t want to think about what she’d seen there, how she’d found him, the way his eyes had looked, so dull and flat. Saying-saying his-

“I’m…I’m so glad you’re okay, Buck,” She whispered, voice breathy and filled with worry, yet so damn relieved nevertheless.

Bucky’s shoulders dropped slightly and he nodded tiredly. “Wouldn’t be if you didn’t come for me.”

Stevie dropped her helmet to the forest floor, taking those two steps towards him. He nearly startled when she cupped the sides of his face and pressed her forehead against his. “I’ll _always_ come for you, Bucky. _Always,_” She whispered, clasping the back of his neck, grounding them both in the present.

Bucky nodded as much as her grip allowed of him and breathed out roughly through his nose, hands clenching into fists at his sides. “I’m-I’m glad you’re safe, Stevie…I’m glad you’re not sick no more,” He whispered, hands still clenched, near afraid to touch her or so it seemed.

Stevie inhaled shakily as she met his gaze and was momentarily struck dumb by the colour she saw there. The _colour._ She wasn’t colourblind anymore and she, she’d been so distracted with everything she hadn’t truly _looked._ Hadn’t _seen. _His eyes were the deepest darkest pools of grey-blue and she knew, just _knew_ she’d never forget that colour. She’d see it in her dreams, certainly. _God_, but he was beautiful. She stroked her thumbs lightly over his dirtied cheeks as she pressed in closer, feeling the warmth of him barely hiding beneath his clothes and wanted to wrap him up in her arms and keep him safe. Like all the times he’d done so for her.

“I missed you so much, Buck,” She whispered, lips so close to his, their noses practically brushing.

Bucky raised his hands to her hips then, unable to help himself any longer and he shuddered a little when his hands curled over her, feeling the heat beneath his palms, the _solidness_ of her new body hidden beneath the clothes she wore. Her waist was still little, impossibly so when taking in the rest of her, but she was no less beautiful with her new curves.

She made a soft noise in the back of her throat at his touch, her nose bumping his gently. “I m-missed you too, Stevie. You got no idea, no idea,” He breathed and both were unable to resist one another.

She whimpered as their lips met. All the time apart, the terrifying realization that he could have died, she could have lost him forever was just too much to think about. Her hands slipped from his cheeks to grip at his chest and Bucky hissed against her lips as she clutched at him.

“Sorry-_sorry-_“ She gasped, breaking their kiss and taking a step back.

He wasn’t wearing a coat or anything, only a tattered shirt and she hadn’t realized her own strength when she’d grabbed him. Her nails had unintentionally dug in, despite her gloves. “It’s okay, Stevie, _shit_, it’s okay,” He consoled, stepping back into her space, but she was flushed and worried and she pressed a hand gently against the middle of his chest to keep him a safe distance away from her.

“It’s not, Buck. I’m r-really strong now, I could hurt you if I’m not careful,” She frowned, letting him pull her in closer but keeping her hands to herself.

“You won’t hurt me, Stevie. You didn’t, not really,” He consoled. “Just surprised me is all.”

But she shook her head, pulling back a little and casting a furtive glance over her shoulder back towards camp. “We should get back, i-it’s not safe to be too far from them.”

Bucky nodded, his hands still settled low on her hips, _Christ_, but she _had _hips. He licked his lips when she turned back to face him and was pleased when her bright blue gaze even in the darkness tracked the movement of his tongue. His heart physically _ached_ with how much he wanted to hold her, tell her he loved her and somehow get them both the hell out of there and to safety. “Yeah, don’t want them talking an’ all,” Is what came out of his mouth instead.

Stevie blinked and then shook her head, determination settling across her brow. “They can talk all they want, Buck. I don’t much care,” She whispered, one of her hands coming up to brush through his hair lightly, dislodging who knows how many days of dust and dirt from his dark locks.

Bucky huffed, turning his head a bit and letting her hand slip from his hair. “Well, _I _care.”

Stevie blinked, expression falling as she watched him take a step back from her. “O-of course,” She whispered, looking away.

Bucky glanced back towards her, wondering at her sudden shift in tone. She didn’t sound very pleased and he wasn’t entirely sure why. She bent to pick up her helmet, absently brushing off some of the dirt. She wasn’t meeting his eyes anymore and he ducked his head in an attempt to get a read on her.

“Did I say somethin’ wrong?” He queried, biting his lower lip nervously.

She shrugged, glancing back towards where the men were still gathered. “No.”

Bucky’s face scrunched up in disbelief. “You’re a terrible liar, Rogers.”

She scowled at him. “I get it, okay? You don’t want to be caught necking with me in front of your unit, it’s fine-“

Bucky’s eyes practically bulged from their sockets and she _missed_ it. “Pardon?”

She rolled her eyes, huffing as she fixed her helmet back on her head and turned to look at him again. “You don’t want the guys seeing you with me, I get it, Barnes.”

“You apparently _don’t_ get it,” Bucky muttered, practically stomping his way over to her.

Her brows rose in surprise as he crowded into her space, pressing her back against a tree. She blushed lightly when he pulled her helmet off and gripped her hip with his free hand. “They gotta’ _respect_ you, Stevie. I don’t want anyone to think you’re mixed up with me, pal. Not-not when you’re-not, not when you look-“

Stevie shook her head slowly, realization dawning. “Hang on a minute there, pal. I don’t think you’re getting it right.”

Bucky frowned. “What?”

“Bucky…I would happily walk back over there and _announce_ that I am off limits to any and every man there because I belong to _you,_” She breathed, gripping the back of his neck, drawing him in real close before gentling her touch.

Bucky breathed out shakily. “You don’t gotta’ do that, Stevie. They need’ta respect you, you don’t-”

Stevie hummed softly under her breath, interrupting him. “They do, can see it in their eyes, on their faces. I’m a woman and I know they probably don’t much like it, but they saw what I can do, what this body can do and maybe I should march back there and tell ‘em all I’m yours. Maybe then it’d get through that thick skull a’ yours.”

Bucky huffed in amusement, letting her draw him in closer. “I belong to you too, Stevie. You know that, don’t ya’?”

She nodded, a little stiltedly and Bucky huffed, kissing her hard, pressing his whole body up against hers. She gasped at the feeling of him pressing against her so fully and she was unable to stop from moaning as he nipped at her bottom lip, tongue swiping against the seam of her lips teasingly.

“God, _Bucky I-_“

“Hush, pretty-“

She _moaned_ and Bucky grunted a little at the sudden press of her hips against him. “Bucky, please, we can’t. Not here,” She whispered, gently grasping Bucky’s shoulders and pushing him carefully back a half-step.

Bucky nodded, feeling rather dazed. “Y-yeah, you’re right, Stevie, _sorry_,” He apologized, handing her helmet back.

She swallowed hard, shaking her head as she accepted it. “S’okay, Buck. C’mon, we should get back um…get you something to eat. You should rest while you can, we’ve got a long way to go in the morning.”

Bucky nodded, letting his gaze sweep over her frame as she pulled her helmet back on and motioned him ahead of her. He didn’t question the fact that it was her following him back to camp for a change, wasn’t sure he was strong enough right then. Because now it was her turn to watch out for him and he-he wasn’t ready to think about that yet. About all the ways their friendship, their _relationship-_if that’s what they were doing-might change now that she was-now that she was-

_Well,_ there were a lot of things she was now, he supposed. He wondered if she knew.

.

When the two strode back into camp, the hushed murmurs of moments ago had dissipated and Stevie tried not to snort in amusement. She’d heard perfectly well some of the closer conversations. There was nothing derogatory, however, not like she and perhaps Bucky too, had expected. Not that she thought Bucky could hear it, not nearly like her, surely. But, it didn’t matter, she merely nodded to some of the men as she passed them by, Bucky’s presence ahead of her veering off to where the rations were being handed out to get something for himself.

Stevie took the moment to walk to where the wounded were being tended to and she crouched down to speak quiet words of comfort to a few of them as she said she would. She wanted to make sure they were alright and offer anything she could to help. She’d learned enough from her mother to be able to tend to most wounds and with her tendency to get into more fights than she knew what was good for her, she’d done her fair share of bandaging up herself when it called for it. They denied her help, however, but not unkindly. They’d been tended to by a few of the men and she was grateful at least to have some trained medics in the bunch.

“Get some rest,” She murmured, not exactly an order, but they took it to heart and she watched them nod and attempt to get comfortable where they were or be helped into some of the tents that had been set up.

She strode towards where Bucky was standing with Dugan and Falsworth and caught wind of their conversation before she’d even gotten close. “We set a tent up for you and the Captain, Sarge,” Falsworth explained, gesturing over Bucky’s shoulder to one of the lone tents they’d passed by on their way back through camp.

Stevie did her best not to look, but she knew what they were showing him. “Oh, uh, thanks. But she’s not-I mean, we’re not-“

Dugan huffed and rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what you’re playin’ at, Barnes. But all those stories of a spitfire blonde back home sort of speak for themselves. So do us a favour and don’t lie to us, yeah?”

Bucky huffed, looking embarrassed and caught out. He scrubbed a dirty hand over his face and nodded. “Right, yeah-“ He cleared his throat. “Sorry.”

Dugan shrugged and then straightened when he saw Stevie approaching quietly. “Captain,” He greeted and she smiled a little wryly.

“Sergeant, everything looks good, everyone appears to be settled and attempting to rest. I suggest you both do the same, Bu-_Barnes,_” She corrected, cheeks flushing even beneath the dirt. “Get some rest, yeah?”

Bucky nodding in her direction and gestured back towards the tent he’d been shown. “That’s where I’ll be, Cap.”

Stevie nodded sharply and watched as Bucky nodded at his friends and headed for the tent while Stevie merely smiled and offered to take next watch for something to do. They didn’t bother to fight her on it, not exactly, but they suggested she’d be fine to settle near the far side of the camp, only about fifteen feet from where Bucky would be hopefully sleeping in his tent. She ignored their knowing stares as she nodded and turned away to take up her watch.

She knew it was unnecessary, what with the other men keeping watch, but she wanted to do her part, besides, she really wouldn’t be doing much sleeping, not tonight.

.

A little over two hours into her watch, she’d crept back towards the edge of the camp, another solider having come to relieve her. She’d thanked them quietly and tried to turn them away, but they’d insisted and she didn’t fight him on it. She went back to the tent Bucky should be sleeping in and stilled a few feet away. His breathing was not what a sleeping man’s breathing should be, nor was the sound of his franticly beating heart. She stilled in the darkness and listened.

Bucky was attempting to slow his breathing but didn’t seem to be having any luck in that regard and his heart sounded like it was about to beat out of his chest. Stevie frowned and made her footsteps echo a little more than they typically would as she approached the tent and as she thought it might, Bucky held his breath. She frowned and stepped towards the entrance to the tent, but didn’t go inside. Instead, she sat down in the dirt outside, making sure her boots scuffed in the dirt as she made a bit more noise for his benefit. He kept trying to quiet his breathing after that and it wasn’t until Stevie let out a soft yet discernible sigh that Bucky’s heart seemed to calm, just a little.

She closed her eyes, wrapping her arms around her knees as she listened in the darkness. When she started humming softly beneath her breath a few minutes later, Bucky’s heart finally settled into a normal rhythm, his breathing too. She kept humming long after she was sure he’d finally managed to slip into a doze, maybe not a deep sleep, but some form of rest was better than none.


	7. Chapter 7

“I’d like to surrender myself for disciplinary action.”

“That won’t be necessary.”

“Yes, Sir.”

.

“You’re late.”

“Couldn’t call my ride.”

“Hey! Let’s hear it for Captain America!”

.

“See? I told you. They’re all idiots.”

“How about you? You ready to follow Captain America into the jaws of death?”

“Hell, no. That little firecracker from Brooklyn who was too dumb not to run away from a fight. I’m following her. But you’re keeping the outfit, right?”

“You know what? It’s kind of growing on me.”

.

They’re back in enemy territory, again. Shouldn’t be such a surprise, really.

Stevie’s been on watch for the last hour and it’ll be Gabe’s turn soon and then Dugan’s. Bucky had gone first, despite Stevie wanting to argue. She’d known he wasn’t sleeping much, had even walked in on occasion when he was in the throes of a nightmare. But they didn’t talk about it, at least, Bucky didn’t, despite how many times Stevie tried to get him to open up. He just couldn’t, couldn’t tell her what he dreamt about over and over and over again. Because that would make it real.

He inhaled shakily from his bed roll staring up into the near blackness of the tent overhead. Thinking, thinking about what had happened to him on that table, when they’d dragged him kicking and screaming from his men and knocked him out. They’d injected him with only God knows what and in the few days after their escape he’d been haunted by the phantom burning of whatever they’d put in his veins, the pin pricks and bruising in his arms. They’d disappeared now, much, much faster than they perhaps should have. He didn’t want to think about why that was.

There was this constant itch hiding beneath his skin and sometimes, sometimes he could see and hear things that…it wasn’t as if they weren’t _there_, they were, just…he didn’t think he was _supposed_ to hear or see things quite like this. His body had recovered from his time in captivity too, still lean and not exactly healthy looking, but the bruising had disappeared. On top of that, he was always so goddamn _hungry_. Wasn’t sure he’d ever been hungry quite like this before either and sleep? Sleep wasn’t something that came easy any more but he didn’t feel like he needed nearly as much as once upon a time. How that was possible, he didn’t quite know. He frowned slightly at the thought, still gazing up into the darkness of the tent. Shouldn’t have been able to see much of anything, but…

A couple minutes later he could hear Stevie’s footfalls crunching lightly in the dirt and he knew it was for his benefit that she made any sort of sound at all. He’d seen her be quiet, near silent when she wanted to as they stalked through the halls of base after base, this was to make him feel better…maybe it worked, a little.

The tent flap was pulled back and she slipped inside not a moment later, making sure the flap was secured once more. It was damn cold out there, the snow thick and air thin and Bucky shuddered as a burst of cold washed over him from outside.

“Sorry,” She apologized, making sure the flap was as tight as it could be before she turned to fumble in the dark to get comfortable in her own bed roll…only to find that Bucky had hers pulled over top of himself too.

She huffed softly in reluctant amusement. “Cold, Buck?”

“Fuckin’ freezin’, Stevie,” He admitted, teeth very near chattering.

She hummed, nodding as she shifted to sit down less than a foot away from her friend. It was cold, _fuckin’ freezin’_ wasn’t all that far off the mark to be honest. “You want to cuddle? Maybe I can warm you up a bit?” She offered, glancing into the dark and watching his huddled shape beneath the fabric shift a bit.

And wasn’t that a change, she thought idly, warming him up instead of the other way around for once. She felt his palm land blindly on her thigh a second later and she picked it up in hers. She shifted to get rid of her gloves, wanting to feel his skin beneath her hands. “Hang on then,” She muttered, stripping her gloves from her fingers and setting them next to her pack.

Bucky hummed and scooted deeper beneath his bed roll, listening as she shrugged out of her jacket and utility belt to get more comfortable. She sighed and gave a light tug at the sleeping bags, pulling hers away from him and unzipping the side a ways. “Undo your bag, Buck. We can scooch in close and share body heat, I’ve got an extra blanket we can throw over us too,” She explained, reaching up to her pack and tugging out the ratty little blanket she’d grabbed as an afterthought from their last raid.

Bucky grumbled about it but seemed to manage to unzip his sleeping roll a ways, his shivering only growing that much more pronounced as cold air slipped in. Stevie was mostly quiet as she scooted over closer and reached for him. Bucky startled when he felt her hand press lightly against his chest, over his jacket-because he was just that cold, he’d had to wear it to bed-and shuddered hard at the warmth of her when he wrapped one of his hands around her wrist, thumb slipping under her sleeve to reach bare skin.

“Jesus, Buck. You are freezin’,” She agreed, shimmying in closer.

Bucky snorted and in a flash he had both hands pressed against her chest, over her shirt. “And you’re like a fuckin’ furnace, Stevie. What the hell?”

Stevie shivered as his cold hands shifted down to fumble at the hem of her shirt, tugging it free of her trousers. She squirmed a little as he unintentionally tickled her stomach before she felt his shockingly cold fingers skate up along her abs. She cursed under her breath and Bucky huffed an apology, scooting in as close as he could get, his breath puffing lightly against her throat as he buried in close.

“Guess I do run a bit hot now,” She agreed softly, voice a touch hoarse.

It didn’t take long for Bucky to melt into her warmth, breathing out shakily between them. She slipped her arms around his middle and tugged him closer, her hands splaying wide over his lower back as he nuzzled into her throat, breathing warm, her skin damp with his breath. His nose kept bumping the sensitive skin below her ear and it was at about the fourth time it’d happened that she shuddered, nearly dislodging him and Bucky made a curious sound at her.

“S-sorry,” She whispered, voice loud in the relative quiet of their tent. “Just a little sensitive,” She murmured, pressing a kiss to his temple.

“Oh,” He whispered, not really sure what to say to that.

They didn’t talk about the…_change_ she’d gone through. Not really. Sort of how they didn’t talk about what she’d seen in that lab when she’d found Bucky strapped to that-

They didn’t talk about it.

But Bucky wondered about it. Wondered how it had changed her body. Not that he couldn’t _see_ how it had done so, he just…they were in the middle of a war, so it wasn’t as if he got to see her naked or anything. The most they did was share a couple of kisses in the darkness of their tent late at night when they shared their blankets, sometimes, but only when it was safe to do so. Tonight they were as safe as they’d probably be for a while and the closeness was a rare treat.

He wondered at her strength, too…among other things. He’d seen her fight, seen her throw that stupid shield around like it was nothing. _Hell,_ he’d seen her decapitate more than one man with the damn thing. He clenched his eyes shut at the thought and let out a shuddering breath as one of her hands slipped up his back, over his jacket to caress the back of his neck, grounding him in the here and now.

He knew she was strong, just _how_ strong still rather eluded him. _Christ,_ he remembered her flipping that tank like it was _nothing. _Hottest fucking thing he thought he’d ever seen before, not that he’d be willing to admit that right now. He licked his lips at the thought and in doing so, his now wet lips brushed against her throat. She whimpered and they both froze at the sound, surprised.

“S-sorry-“ She gasped, tugging her head back from him and Bucky glanced up at her in the darkness.

“Nothin’ to be sorry for, s’ my fault,” He murmured quietly. “Thinking about you, is all.”

Stevie stilled and Bucky could practically _feel_ her heart beat pick up beneath his hands which had been pressed tightly between them up under her shirt but over her breasts. He hadn’t even realized just _where_ they’d ended up either, too busy trying to get warm. Wasn’t very gentlemanly like, come to think of it.

“What about me?” She asked, voice soft, curious.

Bucky hummed, dithering. “_Honest?_ I was thinkin’ about you flipping that tank.”

“Flippin’ the…” She trailed off and Bucky swore he could _feel_ the sudden blush that raced along her neck and over her chest.

Bucky made an intensely curious sound at the rush of warmth and pressed in closer, his hips pressing against hers and wow, alright then. Apparently he was hard. Must be the warmth.

“It-well, it was in my way and I needed to uh, get rid of those grunts so…are you copping a feel right now, Barnes?”

Bucky stilled and took stock…hands squished up between his chest and her breasts, thumbs sweeping gently along the crease of her cleavage. So, uh, yeah, apparently he was. “Just tryin’ ta’ keep warm,” He fibbed.

Stevie huffed and Bucky tried very hard not to grin as he tucked himself up against her neck again…and then pressed her chest more fully against him. He shivered and relaxed as she blew out a slow breath, ruffling his hair lightly. “Feel’s nice,” She whispered.

Bucky was a bit surprised she hadn’t told him to quit it or better yet, smacked him upside the head. He huffed a soft laugh at the thought and Stevie held her breath a moment before whispering, “What’s so funny?”

“Nothin’,” He chuckled. “Just uh…remembered when you-“ He cleared his throat a bit. “Smacked me for uh, you know.”

Stevie snorted in amusement, flushing even darker with embarrassment. “Yeah, um, sorry about that,” She whispered, nuzzling into his temple and pressing a kiss to his skin.

“Don’t be, was my fault. I just…this is nice, is all,” He sighed, sweeping his thumbs over what curve of her breasts he could reach.

She nodded, closing her eyes and shifting into the warmth of him. He’d stopped shivering at least, his breath coming in warm pants against her throat that made goosebumps break out across her skin. She was so sensitive now, even fabric had driven her crazy for nearly a week after the serum. She was so sensitive to touch and unfortunately hadn’t really realized just how much until Bucky had come back to her. Every brush of his hand against her arm or a kiss to her cheek, a hand to her lower back…made goosebumps spark near instantly across her skin and Bucky had no idea.

It’d gotten easier to control, but sometimes if she was caught off guard, it still managed to make her shiver. “It is nice,” She barely dared to whisper, eyes drifting shut as she let herself enjoy the press of his body against hers.

Any possible closeness they had now was so important. She wanted any and all of it she could possibly get and she was sure Bucky felt the same. They hadn’t been able to take care of one another like they wanted to, not with the Commandos so close and especially not with them being in the field at _war_.

It wasn’t as if the Commandos didn’t know they were together, it was just…there really wasn’t much in terms of privacy amongst them and Stevie wanted privacy, so did Bucky, truly. But this wasn’t that and every hitched breath and stifled moan was sure to be brought up in the light of day with teasing smiles and flirtatious quips. It was sort of comical, really. The first couple of nights had been somewhat stilted in conversation, the men unsure as to how to treat her or be themselves while she was present. It wasn’t until she sat down one night with them that she finally decided to end it.

“Did Bucky ever tell you about the time he broke my nose?”

They’d stared at first her and then Bucky, all with matching pointed looks aimed right at him. “To be fair…it wasn’t entirely my fault,” He tried to defend, sniffing lightly.

Stevie snorted inelegantly. “No, of course not. You just had to go and pull those guys offa’ me when I had it _handled, _Barnes, I told you. But you had ta’ be the hero and didn’t say nothin’-didn’t know it was him, yeah?-and then when you grabbed me and tried to pull me outta’ there, I swung at you-“

“And I socked you in the damn nose on reflex,” Bucky sighed deeply, still apparently rather guilt-ridden over the incident.

“Yep, you did,” She agreed cheerfully, swiping her thumb over the slight crook in her nose. “See? Crooked as anything.”

“It healed well enough after I broke it,” He muttered petulantly, looking down at his hands, folded lightly in his lap. “It was the other two times it got broke-not by _me-_that it got worse.”

Stevie huffed, rolling her eyes. “That’s true, but you did break me first.”

Bucky’s gaze snapped towards her at the phrasing and even in the darkness of the fire they’d been sitting around, burnt down to the coals to avoid detection, Bucky could see her devious smirk, her features barely illuminated by the low flickering flames hiding in the embers. Bucky found himself returning the smirk as well and then they were interrupted by Dugan’s, “Did she just make a dirty joke?”

They’d burst out laughing after that and Stevie had gone on to tell them to stop pussyfooting around her and treat her no differently than any of the other men. It worked, though sometimes they second guessed something they’d said or done in her presence and she’d have to roll her eyes and snap out a good natured insult or sassed them for their troubles. If anyone did so much as to curb their swearing, she’d cuss up a storm about something and they’d all go back to being potty mouths when called for.

Stevie hummed, drawing Bucky back to the present and the warm press of her solid body beneath his. She was by no means _tiny _or _delicate_ anymore, but there was a definitive _grace_ about her. She may not be the frail young woman he’d once held, but she was still just as beautiful now as she was then, just…_different._ Bucky loved her this way and that way and he was sure he’d love her no matter the shape or size she took.

He hummed, nuzzling his nose against her throat before pressing a damp open-mouthed kiss to the fleshy spot just below her ear. She moaned before she could think about cutting herself off and Bucky smiled against her skin. “Feel good, sweetheart?”

Stevie shuddered, her own hands slipping from Bucky’s back to grasp his hip lightly with one hand and the other splaying wide over his abdomen. “Y-yeah, but-“

“No _but’s_, Stevie. We’ve got a little time to ourselves, can’t we just enjoy this?” He coerced, nuzzling at her throat again before pressing more of those hot, searing kisses there, tongue slipping out to tease wetly at her skin.

She whimpered softly, her hips pressing forward against his and he groaned quietly at the friction on his cock, still trapped beneath the layers of his clothes. “I-I want to, Bucky, I _do,_” She stressed and he felt both of her hands pressing lightly on his chest now, making him roll onto his back.

He was surprised when she followed him over, propping herself up half over him, one of her hands slipping down over his stomach, toying with the edge of his jacket and shirt as she pushed the layers of fabric up higher. Bucky was panting before he’d even realized it, feeling her palm slip beneath his jacket and shirts finally to hit warm skin, her calloused hands catching slightly against the fine hair on his belly. Her palm felt scalding in comparison to the rest of him and he moaned unabashedly at the feel of it on his skin.

“Hush, Buck. You want the guys to get an earful?” She teased, a soft chuckle escaping her.

Bucky huffed, biting his lower lip as he tried to stifle the pleased sounds he wanted to make. He’d missed this, missed being touched by her, being able to touch _her._ Even now it wasn’t exactly proper, couldn’t risk getting undressed entirely, leaving themselves vulnerable in a war zone would have been stupidity on their part.

“Sorry, can’t help it, not when you’re so hot, _Christ_, your hand is practically _burning_ against me,” He huffed, squirming as her fingers teased circles around his belly-button.

She smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to his mouth and Bucky sunk into it, lips parting as her tongue swept out to tease lightly at the seam of his lips. She let out a helplessly soft sound and Bucky’s hands came up to cup the back of her neck, getting a handful of her messy braid in the process. They lost themselves for a while in the kiss, the warmth of one another as Stevie’s warm hand kept drawing teasing circles along his belly and then started slipping lower, teasing the sensitive skin of his abdomen and a little lower, fingers curling into the waistband of his trousers cinched closed by his belt.

“_Stevie_,” He breathed, their kiss breaking for a moment as she pulled back with a question in her bright eyes.

“I want to try something,” She told him, biting her bottom lip in one of her nervous tells, brows pinching up too.

“What…?” He asked dazedly and then he felt her nimble fingers start tugging lightly at his belt.

It didn’t take much for her to unbuckle it and Bucky blinked dazedly until he felt her palm press firmly against the hot line of his cock over his trousers, stroking him over the fabric. He grunted in shocked pleasure and she smiled, still a little nervous, a bit tentative but he could see the pleased expression she wore just begging to deepen.

“I want to try something,” She repeated quietly and Bucky was nodding before he’d given his body permission to do so.

“A-anything you want,” He agreed, licking his chapped lips and shifting his hips restlessly as she unbuttoned his trousers and unzipped his fly.

She had shifted back to his side a bit once she’d managed to tug open his trousers enough to expose his underwear. He hissed softly as cool air rushed in as she reached between the folds of his underwear to pull out his cock, already hard and dripping pre-come. She shivered at the feel of him in her hand, solid and hot, twitching and throbbing in her careful grasp.

“Keep your shoulders covered, Buck,” She whispered. “I don’t want you to get cold.”

Bucky nodded absently, attempting to pull the bed roll over him without dislodging her. His hips kicked up just a little as she stroked him lightly, more a tease of sensation than anything else. He barely managed to stifle his surprised groan as she shifted her grip a bit and grasped him more firmly, her long thin fingers wrapping comfortably around his length, the warmth in them making his whole body suddenly feel overheated.

“Stevie,” He breathed, licking his lips again, hips still shifting restlessly beneath her.

She hummed, shifting onto her side more fully as she shimmied down by his hip. It wasn’t until he felt the damp warmth of her breath ghosting along his partially uncovered hips that he realized what she was about to do.

“Oh Christ, _Stevie,_ you don’t gotta’-“

Stevie chuckled lowly, the sound alone sparking something dark in him. He’d never-_no one’s _ever-

“I want to, Buck. I-I’ve thought about it so many times,” She confessed, cheeks heating despite Bucky not being able to see her fully though she was sure he knew anyway.

Bucky grunted, jaw clenching as he attempted to stifle the sound. She’d _thought_ about it? He tipped his head back into his makeshift pillow and squeezed his eyes shut, as if that would somehow ease the hot stab of want those words evoked in him. He didn’t know what to say to that, could only try and keep his head on straight when she breathed a little roughly through her nose as her lips pressed against his hip, dangerously close to where he wanted them.

“Thought about what it would feel like to wrap my lips around you, feel you on my tongue,” She went on, voice low and now Bucky couldn’t stay quiet.

He whimpered and immediately draped his arm over his face, pressing his mouth into the crook of his elbow to stifle any more potentially incriminating sounds. She huffed a little at the response as she shifted, getting more comfortable before she pressed her left hand against his hip to keep him still as she leaned in closer to his cock, warm breath fanning lightly over his flushed skin.

He jolted at the first brush of her lips against his sensitive flesh and did his best to stifle his groan as her lips parted, tongue slipping out to lick at the underside of his cock head. He stifled his grunt of surprise and when his hips thrust up in a helpless bid for more of _something_, Stevie’s hand pressed a little more firmly at his hip, forcing him to lie still. And wasn’t _that _exhilarating? The fact that she _could_ hold him down. He hissed through clenched teeth and tried to keep his squirming to a minimum…and then her lips were pressing to the slit of his cock in a featherlight kiss.

Her warm breath ghosted over him and he shuddered, forcibly looking beneath his arm to look at her. He knew he shouldn’t be able to see her in the darkness, not this well, but he did; not everything, but far better than he was supposed to. Without thinking too much about _why_ that was, instead he let himself see her mouth poised above his cock, lips parted, tongue peeking out, eyelids heavy and breath coming in hot puffs over his already overheated flesh. He just knew her cheeks were flushed with arousal too.

“Oh, Buck,” She murmured, caught up in it all, her lips brushing the wet head of his cock and coming away tacky with his pre-come.

Bucky whimpered again, unable to help himself and in the next second she was opening her mouth and taking him into her wet heat. Buck breathed out sharply, hips twisting in a futile attempt to get more, more-

Bucky grunted as pleasure rushed through him as she took more of him into her hot mouth, the slick sound of her tongue swiping firmly along the underside of his member making him flush with aroused embarrassment, cock twitching heavily between her lips. “_Ohhh-_“ He moaned and then Stevie _hummed_, the sound reverberating through his entire being as she moved to take more of him into her mouth.

Bucky was awash in his pleasure and Stevie revelled in it. She pulled back up so that only the tip of him was in her mouth. He was not at all prepared for her to suddenly open her lips wider to take nearly half of him into her mouth and once her lips were wrapped snugly around him, did she hollow her cheeks and _suck._

Bucky barely managed to suppress his _howl_, face suddenly smushed against his bicep in an attempt to keep quiet. Stevie moaned in turn, enjoying the way his body responded to her, tensing beneath her hands, cock twitching between her spit slick lips. She moaned around him as she kept sucking, taking more of him into her warmth and stopping short of him hitting the back of her throat. Her gag reflex tickled only a little, if it could even be called a reflex any more. She didn’t exactly feel the need to test it right that second, however.

She bobbed her head a couple of times, sliding her lips up and down his length as she hummed softly around him. She let her tongue press firmly against the underside of his cock, revelling in the sounds he made, the aborted twitch of his hips time after time and then she had her tongue swiping wetly over the head of his cock as she pulled off to take a few quick breaths.

Bucky swore softly, one of his hands snapping down to cup the back of her head and just _hold_ her. She let him, panting hotly against his hip before she pressed kiss after kiss against the length of his cock. “Oh, Stevie,” He whispered, carding his fingers through her hair, tugging strands of her golden hair free from her braid.

“Buck,” She whispered right back and then she was descending on him once again, hollowing out her cheeks as she took him even deeper, the head of his cock bumping the back of her throat.

He choked out a muffled curse, feeling her wet heat constrict around him as his cock slipped in a little further, the tightness of her throat nearly maddening in its intensity. “Oh God, _Stevie_. I’m gonna’ come, you’re goin’ ta’ make me-“

She _whined_ around him and he grunted when he felt both of her hands pin his hips as she forced her mouth harder onto him, choking slightly when his cock slipped just that much further into her throat. _Christ_, but she _wanted_ him to come in her mouth. He moaned, long and low, near _pained_ with the thought.

He was unravelling for her so beautifully and she stroked one of her hands up his stomach beneath his shirt as she tried to swallow around him again. She heard him spit out a curse and she trembled a little, right pleased with herself as her other hand came up between his legs to caress lightly at his balls. He jerked his hips against her with a muffled whimper and she struggled to keep her place. She managed and then forced herself to swallow around him again. He curled up over her in shocked pleasure, both of his hands flying out and fisting in her hair as he started to come down her throat.

She whimpered in surprise when she first felt him twitching heavily between her lips and then the taste hit her, musky and bitter but somehow distinctly _Bucky_. She moaned around him, drawing her lips back up his length to better taste him on her tongue, one of her hands coming to grasp the base of his cock as he continued to spurt wetly into her mouth. She _mewled_ around him, sucking him a little softer now as she swiped her tongue over the head of his cock, teasing in to his slit and tasting his release, marvelling at it. She swallowed around him again, swallowing his come and he groaned as she did so, his large hands still clutching at her hair weakly as his cock throbbed on her tongue.

She eased off slowly as his hands began tugging lightly at her hair in an attempt to get her to stop. It was too much, too much stimulation after he’d just come so hard he swore he saw _stars._ She huffed lightly as she pulled off him with a wet pop, his softening cock dropping to his hip as she breathed in deeply, pressing a wet kiss to his groin, just above his cock. His cock twitched weakly as he watched her lick her lips as she lay her head against his trembling thigh.

“_Stevie-_“ He breathed, licking his dry cracked lips. “God, that was-that was so-“

Stevie huffed a soft laugh as she licked her lips again, still marvelling at the taste of him on her tongue. She glanced up through her lashes to him in the darkness and even there she could see his wide-eyed stare. She couldn’t help but preen under the attention, her cheeks flooding with warmth and affection as he stroked his hands over her hair with less than stellar coordination.

“Liked that, did ya’?” She teased and Bucky _groaned._

Her voice was rough and gravelly and _Christ_, she sounded positively _ruined _and without thinking, he reached for her, grabbing her arms roughly and dragging her up the length of his body to kiss her smartly on the mouth. She made a soft noise of surprise but she let him pull her in and they both fell into the kiss. Despite Bucky’s first rough press, the kiss was sweet but heated and Stevie relaxed into it easily.

“Liked it? _Liked it?_” He asked incredulously, nipping lightly at her bottom lip before he was twisting and pushing her back over to her bed roll, pinning her beneath his weight.

Stevie chuckled softly, voice still incredibly rough as she let him push her over, but they were soon tangled in their bed rolls respectively and Bucky was sighing in frustration when he could get at her the way he truly wanted.

“It’s okay, Buck,” She murmured, caressing his cheeks soothingly as she pressed soft kisses to his lips, his chin, up along his jaw. “I’m okay.”

“It’s not, pretty, I wanna’ take care a’ you,” He bemoaned and Stevie smiled as she tucked her face into the crook of his neck.

“I know, Buck, I do,” She consoled, nuzzling gently at him. “But it’s late and we need to get some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow, can’t fail our mission.”

Bucky groaned in frustration and Stevie petted his hair, along his neck and down his back. “I’m gonna’ treat you so good, Stevie. Next time we have a bit of time to ourselves, I’m gonna lay you out in a real nice bed and treat you real special, pretty, I swear it.”

Stevie hummed, nodding as she pressed a kiss to his throat. “I know you will, Buck. I do, I remember how you took care of me, won’t ever forget it,” She admitted, nuzzling his throat and breathing in shakily. “You’re so good to me.”

Bucky breathed out just as shakily himself as he pulled his face back to look at her in the darkness. “My pretty girl,” He whispered and Stevie huffed, turning her head away from him, a blush staining her cheeks. “Only deserves the best.”

Stevie rolled her eyes and nudged him lightly. “Quit your sweet-talking, Barnes. Get back under your covers,” She coaxed, listening as Bucky grumbled and shifted back over to his bed, tucking himself back inside his trousers.

It didn’t take long before they were both settled back under their covers, the darkness heavy around them, the air thick with Bucky’s arousal and the heat they’d built up between them. At least the tent wasn’t cold any more.

“Yeah, yeah,” He muttered, dragging his bed covers over to her as close as possible, his hands shifting between them to caress her stomach lightly.

He relaxed when he felt her own sweep up over his, gently grasping his wrists and keeping his hands where they were. “I love you, Bucky,” She whispered, pressing a kiss to first his cheek and then his lips.

He nodded lightly and returned her sweet kisses with a few of his own. “I love you too, Stevie. More than you know,” He breathed, tipping his forehead against hers and just breathing her in.

Stevie fell asleep not long after and for once, Bucky didn’t struggle to find peace in the darkness either. He found it in the steady beating of her heart, the slow even breaths she kept taking and the soft rise and fall of her chest beneath his hands. No nightmares plagued him when he too found sleep a little while later and for that he was grateful. They had a mission tomorrow, to infiltrate a train and apprehend Dr. Zola. It had to go well, because Bucky had questions and he needed answers.


	8. Chapter 8

It’s a strange place that space between sleeping and waking. It’s dark and confusing, stifling at times because you can’t make out what’s happening around you clearly. Though sometimes, you don’t even know or remember where you are, where you _should_ be_._ Sometimes, you forget yourself in that space, forget what you’ve been up until that moment you finally draw in a deep breath, open your eyes and blink the sleep from your lashes. That moment, that strange place between sleeping and waking, sometimes…sometimes Stevie wished she could stay there a while longer. Because there? There she didn’t have to be anyone or anything. She could just…_be._

Foolish to think she could remain in that space for more than a moment or two, of course. Didn’t exactly stop her from trying though.

But, she could hear the others talking softly nearby, the soft clink of a mug against a counter and the shift of a stool against the hardwood, the low voices on the television off to her right. She inhaled slowly through her nose and now she could smell the coffee, the remnants of the pizza they’d had for lunch…after they’d come back from an early morning call to assemble. They’d showered, dressed and eaten until they’d more or less passed out on whatever available surface there was to be had.

She swallowed thickly and blinked her blue eyes open, taking in the white vaulted ceiling above her, the pot lights and off to the left a little, the skylight that was filtering in blue skies and fluffy clouds as they rolled overhead. They’d been out on an extended mission for three days prior, had barely managed to get some sleep when they’d returned before they had been woken in the early hours by the call and had been forced to head out to take care of a precarious hostage situation.

It _had_ been taken care of, no casualties. But they were so damn _tired._

Stevie shifted, taking stock of her body, the minor aches and pains scattered throughout. Couple of bruises and scratches littering her frame, nothing she wouldn’t be able to walk off in a day or so. Small miracles and all that. She pulled herself up into a sitting position, swinging her long legs over the side of the couch to plant her bare feet squarely on the floor. She flexed her toes against the wooden floor, rolled her shoulders and cracked her neck as she stretched her long arms over her head to work out any remaining kinks.

With a heavy sigh, she cast her gaze around the living room and found Clint draped over the back of the grey love seat in track pants and an oversized hoodie, drooling into the leather as he slept. Her lips quirked and she glanced over to the armchair nearby to find Thor nibbling on a piece of pizza, one of the dozen or so pizza boxes settled in his lap as he watched the television. On said television there appeared to be a show about the SPCA…rescuing puppies, so many puppies. She looked away when Thor made a soft noise and met her gaze.

He was looking at her kindly, smiling around his bite of pizza as he nodded his head and gestured to the box in his lap. She smiled in understanding but shook her head, murmuring a thanks, but no thanks. He shrugged and went back to his pizza and puppy rescue show, leaving her to her own devices.

She stood, noting the slight twinge in her hip before she stretched again and headed towards the kitchen. Natasha was chatting quietly with Bruce, both in fresh soft clothes and looking sleepy but at least still cognizant enough to carry on a conversation as they sipped at their coffees. They smiled at her tiredly as she passed, heading towards the near empty coffee maker. She’d barely managed to procure a mug from the cupboard before she heard Tony come into the kitchen with heavy steps, grumbling a tired hello to Nat and Bruce before she _bumped_ purposely into Stevie’s back.

She huffed an amused chuckle, not budging as Tony pressed his forehead in between her shoulder blades and grunted a hello as he breathed in the smell of her hair. She rolled her eyes fondly as she sidestepped him and he was forced to stand up straighter and when she turned to say hello herself, she found him looking down at her mug of coffee longingly. She hung her head in defeat when he looked up through his lashes at her with the biggest puppy dog eyes, looking all hopeful and soft in his black t-shirt and low slung blue jeans…barefoot too.

His hair was a wild mess of unruly dark curls interspersed with wisps of grey hiding therein. The crinkles around his eyes were so endearing…she handed over her mug of coffee without another thought and ignored the soft pleased sound the genius made as he curled his hands around it protectively and inhaled the scent of the good stuff.

She turned back to the now empty coffee maker and started to busy herself with putting on another pot. She really would like a cup and she was sure once Clint awoke, he’d be in search of one too. While she busied herself with that, Tony plopped himself down next to Bruce at the island and rested his elbows heavily on the countertop, sighing into his mug adoringly before taking a healthy sip.

Stevie waited patiently by the coffee maker, back to it as she surveyed her little group of friends and they were friends, family even nowadays. She wasn’t quite sure how that happened exactly, but here they were, living together, first in Stark Tower, thereafter coined Avengers Tower…and now, now they were at the new Avengers Compound in upstate New York. A beautiful place, actually. Set back away from the city a bit, making them feel more secluded and safe from all those prying eyes.

The Tower had been…well, not _nice_ exactly. Stevie had thought it rather ugly at first sight, but it had grown on her after a while. Once it started to become a home, that is. But now the Compound was her home and wasn’t that a trip? She inhaled slowly and closed her eyes, letting herself slip into that quiet space with only sounds and the warmth of her arms as she draped them around her middle.

They’d moved to the Compound nearing on six months ago now. Prior to the move, they’d lived in the Tower for nearly two years. Stevie had been in the future-the _future-_for a little over that, but not much. Everything had happened so quickly. One day she’d been sleeping…she refused to call it anything else. She had merely been sleeping, that’s all and then the next, she was awake, confused, terrified and devastated in equal measure. She’d met Fury and that had been that.

They’d formed the Team as a necessity, thanks to Thor’s brother and it was in thanks, truly. Maybe not right away, but in time. Loki wasn’t so bad, once you got to know him…and forget about the atrocities he’d committed. Wasn’t entirely his fault. In the grand scheme of things, he was merely a pawn in a much larger game, a victim. Even if he had been willing in the beginning, he wasn’t when he saw the devastation he’d caused. He’d since reformed and well, that had been that.

So, they’d formed the Team, the Avengers and had been in each others pockets ever since. It was most certainly not all sunshine and rainbows, that was for sure. But, it worked. _They_ worked. They fought together, trained together, ate together, slept-er-well, not _together _exactly-but under the same roof and more importantly, they _trusted_ one another. It had not been an easy feat, accomplishing all of this and it had taken a considerable amount of time and patience, _but_, it had been accomplished. Stevie-_Captain America-_led the Avengers with everything she had and then some. They worked alongside SHIELD under Fury’s watchful eye…the eye of the world as well and it worked. _They_ worked.

Stevie was brought back to the present when the coffee maker dinged and she turned to busy herself with getting a mug down and pouring herself a cup. No sooner had she filled the mug did Clint appear at her elbow making a _grabby-hands _gesture for her mug. Her shoulders slumped and she handed over her freshly filled mug without much complaint, Clint’s soft hum of approval making her roll her eyes in fond exasperation.

A moment later, _finally_ a mug of steaming coffee cradled in her hands with a dollop of maple syrup mixed in raised to her lips, she took a sip. The warmth of the liquid against her tongue had her shoulders relaxing, features softening, forehead wrinkle evening out and the tenseness she’d felt permeating her body just…_slipped away._

She must have a made a soft sound, probably a little bit sleepy and happy-_content-_because Tony was looking over his shoulder at her as she approached the island to take a seat opposite him with a curiously fond smile tugging at the edge of his mouth as he watched her over the rim of his mug. She shrugged a bit as she took her seat and smiled faintly as she glanced over at Natasha as she cut up an apple and offered her a piece.

She took it, murmuring a soft thanks, watching as Natasha started handing over bits of the cut up apple to Bruce and Tony too. Clint had gone back to sit with Thor in the living room, apparently very invested in seeing how the show concluded, both men leaning forward in their seats as they gave the television seriously concerned looks. Stevie’s heart swelled a little, knowing that once the show was over, Clint and Thor would come tell them all about what the SPCA had done for those puppies and how they should make it a point to visit some shelters soon for a bit of PR.

It really was never about the PR, Stevie knew. They loved animals, all of them did, even Tony who insisted he hated dogs and cats and everything in between. He’d much prefer his robots, thank you very much. It was a front, because no sooner did the pair come over to chat about it did Stevie know that Tony would be conspiring with Jarvis to donate once again to the SPCA and work out something for all of them to participate that would probably end up with Clint adopting a dog-_again-_and then they’d have to find yet another farm where the pup would be happy to live out its days. Despite what Clint and the others wanted, the Compound and their lifestyle simply was not meant for a puppy to live amongst.

Sure enough, ten-minutes later Stevie was being regaled with the heroics of the SPCA courtesy of Thor and when they’d discussed a potential visit, Tony said he’d have it handled. If Stevie happened to see Tony tapping away at his phone screen and murmuring something to Jarvis along the lines of, _anonymous, yeah J._ Well, Stevie just kept her soft smile hidden in her coffee mug.

Once they’d all managed to perk themselves up with a bit more coffee and discussions of what they should make for dinner and do thereafter, they didn’t feel so tired anymore. Stevie had promised to make dinner and Bruce offered to help later on, so there was that at least. Stevie disliked always ordering in, not that she didn’t enjoy it occasionally, but she did prefer to cook her own food when possible. Sometimes, like right after a mission, however, take away was clearly the logical choice and she never fought it. Sometimes you really just had to pick your battles, she thought with a wry smile.

The rest of the afternoon passed uneventfully, the group simply relaxing and chatting, watching television and later they played a couple of video games. Stevie eventually left the sketch she’d been working on to start making dinner, Bruce joining her within a few minutes of starting in on the vegetables. They’d planned to make a vegetable medley over rice with salmon and sole, aiming for a healthy meal in lieu of their rather unhealthy lunch.

While they busied themselves with dinner preparations, Bruce working on baking the fish, Stevie working on sautéing the vegetables and getting the rice ready, Thor, Natasha, Clint and Tony came to gather in the kitchen. They’d pulled out a few beers, some wine and a scotch for Tony while they idly chatted about everything and nothing. Tomorrow they would have to debrief with Fury, but they’d been given the night off…pending no emergencies and promised to arrive for debrief first thing in the morning about both their away mission and the hostage call. Tonight, tonight they would relax, eat, head to bed early and try and get some proper sleep and Stevie was all for it. They’d worked themselves too hard lately. Not that that was a real change of pace for them.

Stevie was startled out of her musings when a bit of green pepper slopped out of the pan and hit her sweat-pant clad thigh, dirtying the grey fabric. She grimaced and bent to pick up the green pepper, tossing it into the compost under the sink before grabbing a cloth to wipe up the mess on her pants and the floor. There was a soft snicker beside her and she glanced over to find Tony looking down at the wet spot she’d left on her pants.

“What?” She asked, brow furrowing as Tony then stepped into her space and plucked at the baggy fabric at her hip; it really was quite big on her, the drawstring done up as tight as possible around her small waist.

“You still haven’t figured out how to dress yourself, I see,” He teased and Stevie rolled her eyes, swatting his hand away from her hip gently and going back to the task at hand; stirring the mix of vegetables with a wooden spoon.

“Not this again,” She muttered, rolling her eyes. “You going to give me hell for my lack of bra again, too?”

Tony smirked, popping his hip against the counter beside her. “Nah, I’m over it. Whatever you wear, you’ll still be distracting, so what’s no bra among friends?”

Stevie huffed, her cheeks flushing a bit as she refused to look at him, focused intently on her cooking. This was by far not the first time her…wardrobe choices had been brought up and certainly not only Tony had done so. Natasha _begged_ her at one point to go shopping with her, but Stevie had refused, saying she could simply order clothes online whenever she needed something. Tony nixed that idea pretty well right off the bat, however, when she clearly didn’t know what sizes were right for her and made sure Jarvis had her measurements before ordering her a slew of jeans, dress pants, leggings, shorts, skirts, dresses, t-shirts, long-sleeves shirts, blouses, sweaters, both fancy and not fancy. Shoes too and jackets and _panties_ and _bras_ and _Christ_, Stevie’d nearly had a heart attack at the delivery.

She’d marched up to the man the morning they’d arrived at breakfast and she’d gone on a tangent about being fully capable of purchasing clothing for herself and when she’d snapped at Tony for sticking his nose in other people’s business, giving him hell for buying her _underthings, _Tony had calmly told her that it had _become_ his business when she’d started showing up to not only breakfast, lunch and dinner…but _debriefs_ with t-shirts that were much too tight-and that was _okay-_he’d insisted, but the fact that she never seemed to wear a _bra_ was decidedly _not okay_. Because it was _distracting!_

Stevie had been so floored. She hadn’t _thought_ anything of it! She just, she disliked most bras, had always disliked them, actually. She only wore one when she was in her uniform and that was a specialized bodice built into the suit, not an _actual_ bra. She’d not said much to that, jaw having snapped shut and cheeks flushing in embarrassment because she was in the _kitchen_ with Tony and the _entire Team_, all having witnessed her outburst…and now they were openly staring at her chest. Because yes, okay, she maybe wore her shirts a size too tight, but they were comfortable, _god damn it_. She knew if she got a little chilly, you could see the hard peaks of her nipples, but she ran hot, she was almost always warm and they only poked through the fabric a _teensy-tiny bit,_ so she’d thought it wasn’t a big deal. She’d been rather wrong, apparently.

She’d gathered herself up and managed to say something to the effect of, _well, maybe if you could drag your head out of the gutter, my breasts wouldn’t be so distracting for you, Mr. Stark._ Tony had spluttered, gesticulated wildly at her as she crossed her arms in front of her chest only _worsening_ the problem, or so Tony’d said. The others had kindly averted their gaze and announced that she was an adult and could wear whatever the hell she wanted and Tony had better just suck it up. Natasha had grinned when Tony had cornered her thereafter and proclaimed, _you said you’d back me up! That the no bra thing was just as distracting to you as it was to the rest of us!_

_Oh, did I?_ She’d feigned and Tony was just _done._

But, he did continue to tease her about it…after a safe amount of time had passed. He’d had the clothes returned, though remained unaware that some of the garments had stayed in Stevie’s possession. It wasn’t as if he actually _saw_ what Jarvis had ordered for her, so he never realized she’d actually worn some of the pieces she’d deigned worthy. She took the teasing in stride. Stevie was a little shit at heart and had sass that rivalled even Tony Stark. Tony secretly loved that about her and if she secretly loved that he could keep up with _her,_ well…that was neither here nor there. So, while they teased each other, there was never any malice behind the jabs. All of them teased one another, it was just what they did. They were family, sometimes it was just too easy to poke fun.

“Well, I’m glad you’re being so noble about the fact that I hate bras,” She sighed then, drawing Tony’s gaze back to her…thankfully, not to her breasts.

Stevie had to commend him, he had gotten better about letting his gaze stray to her chest. So did the others, but well, she’d tried to let it stop bothering her. They weren’t _ogling_ her, per-say. They just swept their gazes over her once in a while and she knew she probably did the same, it wasn’t _lustily_ or _hungrily_ looking at her, so it appeased her at least somewhat.

“You…_hate_ them?” Tony asked, a bit of curiosity in his voice.

“Uh, yes?” Stevie said, as if he were a bit dense, still pushing around the vegetables in the pan.

“Oh, well…_why_ exactly, do you hate them?”

“I-“ She started, shaking her head as she turned to look at him and subsequently the rest of the group gathered in the kitchen, watching her curiously.

She swallowed. “They’re…they don’t fit right and the fabric can be too scratchy or sharp, the straps dig in and the-they’re just uncomfortable, alright? I can deal with wearing one in my suit, I like that one because it’s tight, yes, but it also…compacts them, I guess? Like, _supports_ them.”

No one was speaking for a second and she huffed, brandishing her spoon a bit and Tony jolted into speech. “What do you wear when you work out, run, even?”

Stevie blinked. “I wrap them.”

“What?” Natasha blurted.

Stevie blinked, her cheeks heating in embarrassment, swallowing hard as she was suddenly hit with a memory. She shivered a little and Tony blinked at her uncertainly. “I just, wrap them. Like, with a bandage.”

Natasha blew out a breath and shook her head. “Stevie-“ She started but the blonde merely cleared her throat, turning back to her task, shutting off the burner and moving to put the veggies into a dish to bring to the table.

“It works, what’s the big deal?” She tried to brush them off, busying herself with dinner, Bruce coming over to help her take the fish from the oven a second later.

“There are sports bras,” Tony found himself saying. “Just like what is in your suit, thought maybe not quite that good, but that’s not the point-“

“What _is_ the point then?” She suddenly snapped, rounding on him, hands now shoving the casserole dish at Tony and practically _daring_ him to take it.

Tony swallowed thickly and visibly steeled himself, _tentatively_ taking the dish from her outstretched hands. Okay, so, she hadn’t exactly expected he’d take it. Her shoulders slumped as he carefully took it from her outstretched hands and then turned to put it on the counter. They all watched as he visibly shuddered and then wiped his hands compulsively on his t-shirt.

“Tony,” Stevie tried. “I’m sor-“

“The _point _is-“ Tony spoke over her, coming back to stand in front of her. “That it probably hurts you, wrapping yourself like that. You need proper support. I wish you’d said something, I could have-“

Stevie outright _laughed_ at that. “Could have what, Tony? Gone _bra shopping_ again for me?”

Tony’s shoulders slumped. “No, I could have _made_ something for you. I know you’re not exactly…standard size…”

Stevie’s cheeks positively _bloomed._ “All I’m saying is, you’re probably hurting when you run and workout and stuff and I could help.”

Stevie huffed, turning away and assisting Bruce with the rice and fish, the scientist already having moved the fish into a dish and offering it to her. She dropped both off at the island, noting that Clint and Thor had set the table at least. She wiped her hands impatiently on her thighs and turned back to Tony. “It’s not that bad,” She tried to defer, shaking her head, but she was no longer meeting his or anyone else’s eyes.

“_Bullshit_,” Natasha breathed, catching Stevie off guard, looking to her friend with a frown. “_I_ don’t have much in the way of breasts and it is _excruciating_ when I so much as take the stairs too fast without a bra on.”

Stevie frowned, shrugging a little. “It’s not that-“ Natasha made a frustrated sound and Stevie grimaced. “Can we not do this right now?”

“Stevie, this is clearly an issue for you, I don’t get why you haven’t said anything before,” Natasha sighed, shaking her head. “If you’re having issues with support, we can figure something out, surely and if the fabrics you’ve tried before are too _scratchy_, then you clearly aren’t trying on anything that’s worth your money.”

Stevie frowned, taking a seat at the island and waiting for everyone else to do the same. They did and when she pointedly started serving herself a plate, the others followed suit, not wanting to upset her further. This was clearly a sensitive subject, actually, come to think of it, any time any of them mentioned her clothing or shoe choice, _hell _any time they had a PR event or gala to go to they were careful not to bring it up. She never took compliments well, not when they were in relation to her looks and they weren’t stupid enough to think she had some kind of body issue.

“We’re going to talk about this later,” Natasha announced, drawing Stevie’s attention and she just knew she wasn’t going to be getting out of that conversation, no matter how hard she tried.

She didn’t nod, didn’t acknowledge her friend either and simply turned her attention to her food. Natasha sighed and then after a beat, steered the conversation elsewhere. Tony was unusually quiet for most of the meal, as was Stevie, but no one said anything about it. After dinner, Stevie dawdled with the tidy up and eventually Natasha had to take her by the elbow and bring her along. They ended up in Natasha’s bedroom, where the red-head sat her down on the edge of her bed and then moved to her chest of drawers.

She didn’t open any of them and merely turned to lean back against the cabinet to survey her friend. “So,” Natasha sighed. “Let’s talk for a bit.”

Stevie grimaced, looking down at her hands folded in her lap. “I don’t really know what to say.”

Natasha smiled kindly and nodded. “Fair enough, but that’s not going to work well right now, so let me start us off somewhere. When was the first time you started wrapping your chest?”

Stevie startled, badly. “What?” She said, gaze snapping up to her friend.

“When was the first time you started wrapping your chest?” Natasha asked again, voice softer now.

Stevie’s gaze dropped to the floor between them. “When I was fifteen,” She confessed.

Natasha hummed softly. “And why did you choose to do that?”

Stevie shrugged a bit, shoulders slumping. “They kept getting in the way, started showing through my shirts and m-my suspenders were rubbing against-“ She made a vague gesture of her chest and Natasha nodded.

“Your nipples,” She helpfully filled in and Stevie rolled her eyes, but nodded. “So, suspenders…that mean you were wearing pants? No dresses or skirts?”

Stevie shook her head and Natasha hummed. “You don’t typically wear dresses or skirts now either. Same reason as then?”

Stevie shrugged and then nodded. “Guess so, yeah.”

“Why’s that?” Natasha queried, watching as Stevie sighed and sat back a bit, gaze flickering up to meet hers.

“It’s complicated…I just…at the time, I wanted to…fit in with-with-“ She faltered then and Natasha watched as she inhaled shakily before pushing out a breath. “Bucky, I wanted to fit in with Bucky.”

“Okay,” Natasha said gently. “And you felt that dressing more masculine accomplished this?”

Stevie nodded and then grimaced a little. “It did and it didn’t,” She explained. “Bucky always treated me the same, even before I started dressing more masculine. He knew I was a girl, obviously, never really treated me all that different because of it but I guess I was afraid he would if-if-“

Natasha sighed softly. “If you started growing up and _looking_ like a girl-a _woman-_“ She offered.

Stevie nodded, looking back down at her hands. “I started wrapping up my chest with bandages to keep them pressed down, less noticeable.”

“And now, why do you do it?”

Stevie shrugged. “It’s not for the same reason, to fit in, I mean. I’m genuinely uncomfortable when I work out, you’re right, it does hurt.”

Natasha made a soft noise of agreement and Stevie plowed on. “But I was fitted before, tried all kinds of bras when I first…woke up and I hated them all, _really_ hated them,” She explained. “They were too tight, too scratchy, the fabric stifling against my skin. I’m sensitive, right? So sometimes it’s just too much.”

Natasha nodded, brows drawn together in thought as she listened to her friend. “Okay, so you haven’t found the right fit or the right fabric yet, that’s totally fixable.”

“Really?” Stevie asked, surprise colouring her tone

“Of course, let me guess, SHIELD sent you to _Victoria's Secret _and you probably had a pushy saleswoman trying to help you.”

Stevie grimaced but nodded and Natasha rolled her eyes. “Right, so I have a solution and you’re probably going to hate it but I can guarantee that we’ll find the right fit for you, I just need to make a call.”

Stevie pinched the bridge of her nose, shutting her eyes as she tried to reign herself in. “Okay, fair enough. Make your call while I work myself up to die of embarrassment.”

Natasha laughed, pulling her phone from her pocket and calling whomever she needed to. Which is how she found Tony in her apartment twenty-minutes later with a tablet, a contact name and an appointment scheduled for tomorrow at 3pm with said contact. On top of that, she also had an unusual request from Tony whom had told her to expect a small delivery tomorrow evening and a promise not to donate whatever it was. She’d blushed through her stuttered agreement and that had been that.

The tablet though, that had thrown her for a loop. She was meant to look through hundreds of photos and highlight the things she thought she might like, ignoring everything she knew about fabrics and the way it might feel while doing so. She merely needed to select fit and rough design patters for the various garments…a lot of which were not entirely exclusive to bras. She at least had returned to her rooms alone and was able to peruse the different items, some lingerie, some practical. Things like robes and slippers, even comfortable and fancy pyjamas too.

So, she selected everything that appealed to her and then sent off a message to the contact to let them know she’d finished her selections. She’d received a curt _thank you_ in reply and that had been that. Oh, and there had been one other promise she’d had to keep…one she wasn’t entirely thrilled about. On Sunday, Tony was taking her shopping…somewhere different and _ugh_, that could only mean a special tailor or dress shop or _something_ equally as fancy. She’d grimaced, but promised, so long as she got to pay for some things. Tony had waved her off but she wouldn’t be swayed. He’d reluctantly agreed.

So, now that her first task was done, she could breathe a little easier, even if she was worrying over just what in the hell she’d be faced with tomorrow after the debrief. Oh well, that was tomorrow Stevie’s problem. Right now, she was going to sleep, thank you very much.

.

Debrief the next morning went well and they said their piece while Fury did his best to hear them all out. It was a love hate relationship for most of them with regards to Fury so there really was nothing to it. Soon enough they were all back at the Compound getting lunch ready, but Stevie didn’t stick around long after she’d eaten, heading up to her apartment where she was told her appointment was to take place.

The appointment was…well, it was something. Let’s put it that way. She wasn’t sure what she expected, but surely this hadn’t been it. Pepper had shown up alongside a much older woman whom she had been introduced to as Abigail, a seamstress that specialized in lingerie and everyday wear of the undergarment variety. After seeing Pepper, she’d managed to relax some. Pepper was good people and had always been kind and caring and although she’d only just met Abigail, the older woman was sweet and sharp as a tack. She’d taken one look at Stevie and gone off on a tangent, most of which was in Italian, so there was that.

She’d spent the late afternoon being fitted, trying on numerous things from panties to bras to pyjamas to specialty bodices, camisoles, robes and garter belts and even pantyhose! She was absolutely flabbergasted with all of the potential items and _nothing_ felt scratchy or itchy at all. These were all very fine fabrics and there was no way you’d find anything like this in a mall, especially not a _Victoria’s Secret._

When she mentioned looking into potential sports bras, Pepper had smiled kindly at her and stated, _we have someone else working on that for you, Stephanie, don’t you worry _and she’d simply nodded, rather dumbfounded about that. Abigail had insisted that she had everything she needed when she left around 7 o-clock that night with Pepper and Stevie had been a little surprised by that, because well, she hadn’t left anything with her. Either way, Pepper assured her she would receive a delivery by end of day tomorrow and that was that.

Stevie had been exhausted afterwards and had decided to stay in and make something small for just herself for dinner. She settled on pasta and while she was busying herself in the kitchen, there was a knock at her door. She startled a little, wondering why Jarvis hadn’t told her someone was coming and hastily wiped her hands on a tea-towel before heading for the door. She did not expect to see Tony standing there looking a little flustered but smiling in a pair of ratty black jeans and a band t-shirt she didn’t recognize. She smiled at him, gesturing him inside and it was only then that she noticed the bag he was carrying.

It was a reusable bag, looked like something from that _Sage _shop Natasha liked so much, actually. “Hey,” She greeted. “I was just making some pasta, would you like some?”

Tony cleared his throat, glancing around the empty space before casting a furtive glance towards the kitchen. “Uh, that’s nice, but uh no, I’m good. Already ate, actually. I just wanted to drop this off, so, here,” He thrust the bag into her hands and she looked down at it curiously as she took hold of it.

There was a bunch of fabric inside, dark by the looks of it, blacks and blues but she was sure she could see some paler colours towards the bottom. “What is-“ She started to ask and then pulled one of the garments from the bag…a sports bra…er, something like one.

“They’re sports bras,” Tony blurted. “I made them, similar fabric to what’s inside your suit but a bit different, not so much uh, _protection_, thinner obviously. But they’ll be able to support you even when you’re running flat out.”

“You _made them_?” She blurted, cheeks heating while still holding the bra out between them; she shoved it back in the bag hastily.

“Uh, yes?” He offered. “I made the one in your suit and you need high grade fabric to keep you from bounc-“

“_Tony-_“ She nearly whined, face flushing.

Tony’s jaw snapped shut and he gave her a wry sort of smile. “They’ll keep the girls down, no more wrapping, it’s not good for you. But uh, I’d like to know how they fit, _later_, just, let me know what you think, if there’s anything you don’t like or if there’s something wrong or, you know, whatever-“

Stevie was still blushing but she nodded, biting her lower lip gently. “T-thanks.”

“No problem,” He waved her off, glancing back to the door. “I uh, hope your appointment went well?”

“Yeah, it uh, Pepper and Abigail were really helpful,” She agreed.

Tony hummed, nodding, clearly pleased. “Yeah, Pep likes her, she’s uh, designed a lot of…things,” He added awkwardly.

Stevie let out an embarrassed laugh and Tony’s smile eased. “Great, uh…you sure you don’t want to stay for dinner?”

“No, no,” Tony chuckled, running a nervous hadn’t through his hair. “I’ve got to get back to the workshop. But uh, I’ll see you later, alright?”

“Sure, Tony,” She agreed, watching as he slipped back out the door, waving to her in his rush to get away.

She huffed, watching him go, feeling rather pleased that she wasn’t the only one embarrassed by the whole situation.

Later that night after dinner was finished and the dishes washed up, she disappeared to her bedroom to try on the sports bras Tony had…_Christ, _**_made._** They fit perfectly and yeah they were snug, but the fabric was comfortable and didn’t fold or pinch in any spots. She jumped up and down a few times and grinned. Barely any movement whatsoever, just like her suit.

“Huh,” She smiled, glancing down at her body clad in those too-big grey sweatpants and the navy blue sports bra covering her chest, locking her breasts in place. “I don’t think I want to know how he got my measurements quite so perfect.”

.

Tony takes her shopping…and it’s…well, it’s something. She’s a tad relieved it wasn’t _just_ the two of them, however. Stevie really had no fashion sense and Tony may have known what’s what, but he didn’t feel comfortable with the idea of pushing certain styles on her. That wasn’t the goal of this outing. Tony wanted her to find her _own_ style and he figured Natasha and Pepper would be excellent helpers and they were.

Tony had made an appointment at one of their favourite seamstress’. They specialized in women’s clothes but the woman’s husband was quite the tailor as well and that’s how Tony had come to know the young couple. Sybil and Carmen Mayberry owned a quaint shop and used only the finest fabrics money could buy. They designed all kinds of clothing and when Tony had told them that their client would be Miss Captain America, _well,_ let’s just say they’d been ecstatic at the chance to dress their national hero.

Tony had hung back on one of the dressing room sofas with his phone and some champagne while Pepper and Natasha worked with Stevie and the owners to find her perfect clothing style. She tried on dresses, long flowy things, tight short ones, sharp pencil skirts or loose near hoop style numbers. But she wasn’t really a fan. She wore her dress blues to most galas and aside from trying them on, Tony had honestly never seen her in a dress. It was a bit of a shame, really, but, it just wasn’t something she cared to wear.

After the dresses and skirts were nixed, they’d asked her about pants and what she liked in terms of fabric and fit. She’d only ever worn sweatpants and khakis and Tony had a hate-hate relationship with the damned things, so he kept his mouth shut. When they asked her about jeans, she’d sort of winced and said she actually disliked the coarser fabric and the fact that they tended to _pinch_ whenever she wore them. Sybil had been understanding, saying that fitted jeans might pinch a little when sitting and the like and Stevie had nodded along and explained that she didn’t feel like she had a great range of motion when wearing them and you never really knew when you needed to well, _move._

Natasha and Pepper had to agree with her there. Natasha said she usually just sucked it up, but any chance she could get to put on leggings or her uniform was a blessing. She said she’d worn leggings and liked them, the softness was always nice and never bothered her despite their snug fit, but she felt nearly naked in them most of the time so she typically wore her khakis or sweatpants around the Compound. Sybil had looked at her husband and smirked, tapping the tip of her nose as if in thought.

“I have the perfect idea for you, Miss. Rogers,” She announced. “How would you feel about high waisted dress trousers? The fabric is much looser through the legs, but the waist is cinched and typically around or just above the belly-button.”

Stevie blinked, smiling a little shyly. “Um, that sounds nice?”

“Perfect!” Both Sybil and Carmen announced and then they were a flurry of movement as they set off in various directions to gather whatever it was they needed.

Pepper and Natasha had joined him on the sofa to sip at the champagne a couple of minutes later when the couple returned and shoved Stevie behind a dressing screen to start trying various items on. It didn’t take long before they’d realized they’d found Stevie’s unique style…and what a style it was. Tony tried to pretend to be busy on his phone, but he really had become rather distracted when she’d started trying on some beautiful dress shirts, some with flowy sleeves, others just simple button-ups with a multitude of different coloured dress pants.

Most were pleated like you might find in women’s suit trousers and in a way, that’s what she was trying on, but most were a little wider in the leg and the waistline was even cinched in some cases. Some required thin belts, some were big fabric bows, just for show really, but they looked pretty all the same. One pair that was navy blue had even a row of brass buttons for the zipper and Stevie had laughed when she realized they were fake, just for show, but she fell in love with them all the same.

And then came the shirts. She’d tried on blouses and button-ups, all different colours and she’d loved those too, but then they pulled out some interesting long-sleeved crop-tops, cashmere sweaters, a few blazers and soft t-shirts and long-sleeved shirts and-Tony was going to die if he had to watch this-_suspenders._

They’d watched as she was presented with them, simple dark brown with brass clasps and she’d suddenly grown quiet. Tony wondered what she was thinking as she ran her hands along them, the soft leather backing before she’d turned to ask Carmen for help with putting them on. She was currently wearing a pair of beige high waisted trousers, wider through the knee to the floor with a half-button up cream shirt, the topmost button left undone and showcasing her collarbones where a few of her curls lay.

Carmen helped her slip her arms through the suspenders, slipping them over her shoulders and she settled into them as if they were a second skin. Tony tried not to stare, but he was rather helpless when it came to her most days, so really, today wasn’t going to be any different. He watched as her shoulders relaxed and she glanced up into the mirrors lining the wall in front of her. He watched then as she shifted, her gaze drifting along her frame, taking it all in. Her fingertips ghosted along one of the suspenders as she met her bright blue gaze in the mirror and Tony swore her eyes were shining with sudden tears.

He went to say something, but then she was turning and smiling kindly at both Sybil and Carmen, Natasha and Pepper too when they’d come up to her to compliment her outfit, her choices and if while they were busy getting things ordered and squared away for a future delivery and Tony happened to inquire about an assortment of suspenders to be included in said delivery, along with a couple of sets of fancy cufflinks, _well,_ Stevie was none the wiser right then, now was she?

After they’d left the boutique, the Mayberry’s insisting everything should arrive in only two days time, the pair having gone ahead and promised to make certain alterations to the clothing she’d tried on so that they were all a perfect fit for her. Stevie had been thrilled, thanking them profusely for their time and efforts. Tony had taken care of the bill, Stevie more than a little flustered by the ordeal when she’d attempted to take care of it herself. Pepper had simply lain a hand against the blonde’s shoulder and whispered, _just let Tony do this for you, he only wants to see you happy._

Tony hadn’t witnessed the conversation, too busy making arrangements to where they should send the delivery and insisting he’d have to schedule an appointment with them soon about getting fitted for a new suit or five. Stevie had merely nodded, smiling kindly at Pepper and glancing to Natasha when the red-head smiled at her sweetly…and a little too knowingly.

Stevie was happy, at least, she thought she was. She loved her friends, her new family and life…even if this life wasn’t what she’d once pictured for herself. She wasn’t sure exactly what she’d pictured for herself, but, she supposed it didn’t really matter all that much anymore. She _was_ happy, as happy as she thought she could be and it really had nothing to do with Tony spending ridiculous amounts of money on her.

Her gaze slipped to where Tony was putting on his sunglasses as they strolled out to where Happy had brought the car around. They’d made plans to go for lunch and soon while everyone settled themselves at the table, Stevie had disappeared to the _washroom _to speak to the manager about taking care of the bill, insisting that Mr. Stark not pay for it this time.

They’d enjoyed lunch together thereafter and when the bill didn’t come, Tony’s narrowed eyes were already settled on Stevie. “You think you’re so sneaky, Cap,” Tony said teasingly, smirking as they piled out of the restaurant an hour or so later.

Stevie had shrugged lightly, smiling and murmuring, _I don’t know what you’re talking about, Tony._ She really should have seen it coming when Happy dropped them off not at the Compound, but at a very prestigious shoe store and when Tony took care of that bill too, Stevie was about ready to fight him for it.

As it was, they all made their way back to the Compound, laden with bags of shoes and a few of the items from the boutique that were ready now. Pepper told them that she’d be leaving tomorrow morning for a conference in Malibu for S.I. but she insisted she was alright to stay for dinner and then some before her flight. They spent the rest of the night with the Team and it was a pleasant sort of normalcy that had Stevie more relaxed than she’d felt in a very long time.

She thought it might have had something to do with the fact that not only did she feel happy, she got to see her friends happy too. Even Tony, who was typically rather reserved with his emotions, even among his friends. He was engaging more with them, smiling and chatting animatedly, granted, he was usually quite talkative, just now, he was smiling and sharing soft looks with Stevie whenever the two happened to catch the others gaze. The big difference was that he was _actually _smiling, his eyes practically sparkling with it as he recounted one thing or another with Thor while the others laughed and joked around with each other.

Stevie looked down at her hands as she cradled her glass of red wine, watching the play of the liquid against the edge of the glass, displaying the wines legs. She smiled if for no other reason than to smile. She simply just felt like it.

.

Two-weeks soon passed by after the whole _I hate bras_ incident that found Stevie a touch out of her comfort zone as she explored shopping with Natasha and Pepper, Tony too and she was finally settling in to her new wardrobe, which wasn’t really all that new if you really thought about it. Just…_different_. She’d always worn trousers growing up, suspenders, button-ups too. These were definitely not like those, but in a way they sort of were? Newer styles, maybe. Nicer quality, obviously. But the casual blouses and high-waisted trousers were comfortable in a way she’d never really given much thought to before. She wore her fair share of t-shirts still, even with the new trousers she’d bought and she felt like this was more her than anything else she’d ever worn.

She also wore her regular comfy clothes like sweatpants and her leggings when she did yoga or worked out, still not all that comfortable in shorts unless she was sparring. The suspenders were a more regular occurrence than she thought they would be when she’d received the delivery. She didn’t _always_ wear them, but sometimes when she was wearing one of her softer crop-tops and less dressy trousers, she pulled them on too and when she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror…she always paused and let herself slip into a sort of wistful state. She knew it probably wasn’t all that healthy, but she liked the nostalgia it brought with it…even if it was a bit painful to settle in to.

She was making a future for herself here, had been for a while. She did things in her spare time for one, like, read a book, sketch, catch up on different movies[usually with the Team]. She also swam at the pool, alone usually, but sometimes someone would join her. The point was, she was _doing things._ Maybe they were boring things[according to Natasha and Tony], but she was still attempting to keep busy. She’d made a friend in Sam one morning while running through the city and he’d introduced her to _Starbucks._ They’d hit it off easily after that, Stevie joining him at various meetings at the VA where he worked and that was all well in the past now, Sam now a member of the Team and better known as the Falcon.

He still worked mostly at the VA, but he had a room at the Compound for when he visited and the like. When they first became friends, Natasha and the others had been convinced they were dating or at least interested in one another like that and when Thor had made a congratulatory comment, the pair had stared at one another and then promptly burst out laughing while proceeding to tell them that they were just friends and Sam was _more like an annoying older brother than anything _and that had been that.

So, to sum up, she was doing things, even if those things tended to be lonesome things or Team bonding things and no amount of Natasha meddling or Bruce mentioning the sweet young man in the lobby _Starbucks_ would get her to reconsider her stance on _dating_. Because really, that’s what it had come down to. She loved her friends but she was growing rather tired of having to fight them on why she wasn’t interested in dating…at least…until they’d realized _why_ all on their own.

Because that _why_ became rather apparent the day they’d nearly lost Tony to a freak lab accident that involved a…_small_ explosion and the Arc Reactor embedded in Tony’s chest and thus, the Team had stopped pestering her because she’d maybe had a bit of a meltdown while Tony was in recovery for nearly two weeks and yeah, so okay, they maybe figured her out pretty quickly during the whole debacle that she was madly in love with Tony. Stevie was sort of surprised _Tony_ hadn’t figured it out by then, actually.

So, they’d stopped pestering her about dating, but that only meant that now they had a new thing to pester her about. Read: _Tony. _They were nice about it of course, just gentle nudges, subtle hints that maybe made her blush and stammer about the whole thing, but she kindly told them to get their noses out of her business and they’d eventually resorted to disappointed sighs and head-shaking…which may have been worse.

She maybe sort of liked Tony, okay? Wasn’t a _crime_ or anything, she could like who she liked. She just…knew she could never act on said feelings because Tony was, _well, _Tony. Way out of her league, a Team member and yeah, those were important reasons. So, she’d left it at that, not willing to risk their friendship for a chance at…whatever it was that she knew she couldn’t have anyway. There was really no reason to think about it. At _all_.

And, even when she did in the safety of her own mind in the middle of the night, _alone_ in her rooms and surrounded by things that reminded her of him…the immense guilt of what she’d lost, _who_ she’d lost made her hate herself all the more for ever even thinking of pursuing Tony. It was _wrong_ to want someone else, it made her feel guilty and awful and everything in between. She’d loved Bucky, _still_ loved him…even after he’d passed, left her alone in a too big world, in a life she wasn’t meant to have.

It was her fault. She’d been the one to fail him in the end. Of course she didn’t deserve to have a relationship now. So, there really was no point in even entertaining such a thing. She was eternally grateful for his friendship, for the Team’s friendship, but the idea of ever having anything _more _with literally _anyone_ was absolutely out of the question. No matter what Natasha said to her, nor Bruce or Thor or Sam or _Christ, _even _Peter_. Kid was sweet and probably a bit too naive but she couldn’t fault him for it. He was young, after all, but not stupid.

They’d all known what Bucky was to her once upon a time, mostly. The history books weren’t far off the mark, not that she’d ever confirmed or denied it out loud to anyone save for maybe Natasha and Sam. It wasn’t anyone’s business but her own and what she chose to share with her friends had to be good enough for them and it was. They never pushed, never pressured, just offered a kind ear and shoulder to lean on if she ever needed it and that was everything to her. They eventually stopped pushing and for that she was at least grateful. She spent a lot of her time as previously mentioned, on her own enjoying more lonesome activities when she wasn’t with the Team.

Everyone needed their own me-time. Which brings us to Stevie’s latest lonesome activity. To be fair, it had always sort of been a thing. Quiet nights in with a glass of wine, maybe a couple of candles lit…some soft music filling the space while she lazed on the sofa in her apartment or on the fancy chaise lounge by the windows[blacked out, courtesy of Jarvis]drawing or reading a book from one of the many bookshelves that lined the walls in her suite…maybe just allowing her mind free reign.

It had only just recently changed into something a bit…well, _more._

It uh, started with the lingerie, really. After she’d met with Abigail and Pepper she’d been so busy with shopping in the following days and when she’d gotten back to her apartment to find nearly a _dozen_ or so pristine black boxes sitting on her kitchen table, she’d calmly carted them into her bedroom, shoved them into her walk in closet and pretended that they didn’t exist…until her curiosity got the better of her, of course. Not even four days later, naturally.

By then she’d received the delivery from the Mayberry’s and she’d just finished trying everything on to ensure that everything fit. She needn’t have worried, everything was specially tailored for her and the fabrics were perfect and soft and wonderful. The shoes Tony had bought for her were all lined up in the closet now with her new clothes too and she admired the varying heel heights. She had mostly purchased dressy and comfortable flats, but she also purchased a few pairs with a kitten-heel, as Pepper had called it…and three others that were definitely higher than she thought she’d be comfortable wearing for extended periods of time. But Pepper had _insisted _and that had been that.

So, the lingerie. She’d finally brought out the boxes and gone through them, laying out most of the items on her bed to simply admire them. And she did, admire them. The items were all made out of the softest fabrics, the finest of silk and lace too. The items that were clearly for every day wear looked soft and perfect, while the clearly more…risqué items were made of lace and satin and in some cases with a bit of sparkle…she really hoped those weren’t actual crystals or worse…_diamonds_.

She’d tried on almost all of the bras, absolutely beside herself at how well they held her up, how they didn’t pinch or tug at her sensitive skin either. She admired the few robes she’d been given as well, all made of the softest satin, beautiful colours too. Everything was in beautiful colours, actually. Pinks, beiges, blacks, reds, blues, so many different shades of blues. And then she’d eyed the comfy pyjamas, pants, tank-tops, t-shirts and shorts made out of satin and soft cotton in all sorts of colours as well.

The rest of the _eh-hem_ **_items_** had been a little on the risqué side, but surprisingly, she’d found herself more drawn to those than anything else. She couldn’t explain it exactly. They were beautiful, not overly ostentatious or anything, but the lace detailing and patterns, the see-through mesh in some cases-all of which made her blush, mind-were gorgeously and tastefully made. They were meant to enhance the figure, not take away from it and she knew they were all especially made for her.

So, she’d not let herself think too much more on it before she’d undressed and donned one of the more lacy numbers, slipped one of the robes over her shoulders and then made her way to the kitchen to pour herself some wine, grab her book from the coffee table where she’d left it and stretch herself out along her chaise to spend the rest of the evening.

It was one of the most sensual things she thought she’d ever experienced and she was _alone._ Needless to say, it sort of became a thing thereafter and of course when her friends started to notice that she was actually wearing proper _bras_ beneath all her fancy new clothes, well, it was only a matter of time before _someone_ noticed she had a tendency to wear…fancy lingerie too.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, sorry in advance. I hope it at least furthers the plot. xP The next one will be longer, I promise. I just felt bad for not posting anything in a little while. <3

“Stevie? You got a minute?” Tony called, rubbing the back of his arm over his sweaty brow once he’d scooted out from beneath his latest project; working on his newly acquired 1965 Shelby Cobra.

Why he needed to work on it was beyond Stevie. The car looked mint but of course Tony had to tinker, so she didn’t bother to question him. She’d been curled up on the couch in the workshop sketching Dum-E for a change of scenery while Tony busied himself beneath the fancy car and so when he called for her, she set her sketchbook and pencil down before heading towards the genius.

“Mhmm, what can I do for you, Tony?” She asked, stepping up beside him as he sat up.

He was covered in engine grease, lord knows he smelled of oil and the like nearly twenty-four-seven and Stevie tried not to laugh as he wiped his cheek and only made the mess there worse. “Could you just lift this damn thing for a minute? I can’t focus on what I’m doing and it’s killing me being under her and feeling all claustrophobic.”

“Why don’t you just use a jack?” Stevie sighed, brows pinched in slight worry.

Tony rarely admitted to feeling claustrophobic but she knew he dealt with it about as well as she did. Which was to say, not well. “I could, but then I’d have to go looking for it and you’re already here, so…”

Stevie huffed, rolling her eyes but conceding the rather frail point, she folded. “Alright, I’ll be your jack,” She teased, shifting to take up his spot as he scrambled a bit to accommodate her.

“Ooh, does that make me Rose or Sally?” He sassed back, watching as she grasped the front bumper of the car and then just…_lifted._

_Wow,_ he really would never get tired of that. He let his gaze rake over her taut biceps, barely concealed beneath her fitted blouse and lower to her forearms, the muscles there on full display as she’d rolled up her sleeves.

“Eh, I liked Sally better,” She admitted and when Tony merely hummed-_distracted-_and slipped back under the car to do whatever it was he needed to do, she added, “Guess that makes you Rose.”

Tony guffawed, grunting softly as he got to work, leaving Stevie to stand there with the car raised to a little over waist height, careful not to let the back end tip too far, all the while with a fond smile on her face. She let her eyes drift around the workshop, Dum-E and U keeping to themselves for once to let Tony work. Stevie’s gaze ultimately fell to the Iron Man suits that lined the far wall of the open space as they were wont to do.

Beautiful in their bright red and gold alloys. They weren’t all still active suits, though Tony insisted on keeping them for nostalgic purposes. Stevie never really questioned him in the first place about them but Tony had shared the information with a bit of a defensive edge one afternoon when she’d visited him in the shop and she’d not forgotten the way he had looked right then. As if he were waiting on being judged for his actions. Stevie wasn’t about to do any such thing and merely smiled and started asking him about each one.

Stevie lost time then, just admiring the suits and most certainly not for the first time. She loved drawing them, every sleek curve drawing her in like a moth to a flame. It was most certainly not just the suits that drew here down her though. Her gaze flickered to the curvy car in her grasp, her ears picking up the sound of Tony still humming under his breath, despite the music pumping out of the sound system someplace. She could hear the steady beating of his heart if she closed her eyes and concentrated a little more too.

She was drawn out of her quiet contemplation a while later when Tony grunted and then pulled himself out from beneath the car, brushing himself off and tossing the few tools he’d had on him onto a nearby work bench. She kept a hold of the car, waiting for him to tell her to put it down, but his order never came. She glanced over her shoulder a minute later when no such order was forthcoming and found the man smirking at her, gaze flickering from her arms, the way the muscles there remained flexed beneath her creamy skin, to her back where she was sure her blouse probably looked rather snug. She raised a brow at him in question. “Are you done?” She asked, tone flat.

Tony hummed, gaze gliding up her arms and further up along her frame, the way her shirt stretched taut there and the long curls of her golden hair settling where they may. She was wearing a pair of those loose fitting trousers, black this time with an oversized bow on her left hip that served no purpose other than to enhance the sheer absurdity that was her impossibly teensy-tiny waist. She’d apparently also left her flats by the sofa and was currently barefoot which shouldn’t be so adorable, but it really sort of was.

“Oh yeah, sure am,” He agreed easily, voice as cheerful as ever once he let his gaze slip up to her pretty face, framed by those big bouncy curls as she looked over her shoulder at him.

Stevie huffed, clearly unamused as she carefully bent to let the car rest back on the floor. She turned around to find Tony wiping his hands on a rag, gaze no longer trained on her and she sighed softly, heading over to him. “You wanna’ come up for coffee? We can grab lunch too, I’m starving.”

Tony nodded, he was rather hungry. What would he ever do without her? Glancing up from his hand-wiping a second later, he had to do a double take and boy was he glad she’d let her gaze wander over to the workshop doors because his eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets. Now that she’d turned around to properly face him, he realized two things. One, her white blouse was undone, just one extra button…but wow, one extra button undone on any of her shirts was three or four too many. She was practically bursting out of her shirt without that helpful little button and what a sight. He nearly choked on his spit when he noted the Second thing…her bra. Like, a _fancy _bra…hiding beneath that unsuspecting white blouse.

Tony was having a heart attack. There was no other reason for the way his heart had seemed to suddenly skip a beat and then start _pounding_ as if it were trying to make a break for it. He must have made a noise because Stevie’s gaze snapped back to him worriedly and when she caught his gaze unmistakably pinned to her chest, she flushed hot at what she realized must have happened. She glanced down as her fingers came up to fix the popped button, glad to have at least not broken the damn thing when she’d put a little strength into lifting the car.

“Wow, uh, _sorry-_“ Tony started to apologize for staring so rudely at her and Stevie made a sort of non-committal sound as she turned away slightly to smooth out her shirt, making sure she wasn’t flashing him any more; _how embarrassing. _“I’m being rude, didn’t mean to stare.”

Stevie shrugged a little, turning back to face him with a blush staining her fair cheeks. “Not a big deal, um, so yes, lunch and coffee?” She suggested, starting off towards the workshop entrance and subsequently, the stairs.

“Yep, sure, sounds great,” He readily agreed, shaking himself free of the slew of incredulous thoughts as he followed her to the stairs to head up for lunch.

Stevie forced herself no to glance back at him and only barely succeeded. They made it to the kitchen without incident and if Tony kept shooting her furtive glances, well, she pretended not to notice. Tony wasn’t so foolish as to think she didn’t notice his staring, not if the ever present blush gracing her cheeks was anything to go by.

Tony was a little beside himself so he hoped he’d be forgiven…at some point, but like…Stevie was wearing _lingerie!_ Which was, you know, sort of a big deal? At least to Tony, because lovely perfect Captain America would _surely _never wear such a _lacy _number…_however_…this _was_ Stephanie Rogers right this moment, distinctly _not _Captain America…sort of.

Tony mentally shook himself while trying not to overtly stare at the woman in question as she busied herself at the counter with making sandwiches, Clint sidling up beside her seemingly out of nowhere and swiping a piece of turkey breast. Stevie rolled her eyes and went back to making the sandwiches and Tony knew she’d offer him one soon enough and the others too as they would no doubt start to arrive.

Unfortunately, the mental shaking didn’t do a whole lot to clear his head, thoughts dragging back to the fact that he’d caught Stevie wearing what appeared to be the softest pastel pink lacy _bra_ he was sure to ever had existed. The lace scalloping he’d glimpsed covering the swell of her breasts, the peak at her glorious cleavage had his throat closing up and mouth filling with saliva so fast he’d felt dizzy with it.

He inwardly groaned, closing his eyes as he pulled his mug of coffee to his lips in an attempt to distract himself. He really should not be thinking about this now that he was surrounded by his friends, whom of course had arrived before Stevie had finished making her first sandwich…which Clint then stole.


	10. Chapter 10

Tony should have let it go. He should have just…_somehow, _stopped thinking about it. _It_ being Stevie wearing lingerie, of course. He really should have known that was an impossible task from the start, but well, hindsight is a wonderful thing. So, now he obsesses over it and it has become an obsession, truly. Usually he can at least tone down his staring, keep it to more like zoning out when he’s a bit sleepy or distracted-by something other than what she might be wearing under her shirt-but not any more. Mind, he still _does_ zone out and get distracted and ends up just staring at her until she moves out of his line of sight or waves a hand in front of his face, not scolding him exactly but clearly exasperated all the same with his staring even if half the time she knows he doesn’t realize he’s doing it.

He tends to wonder about what she might have on beneath those t-shirts, those blouses and crop-tops quite regularly. Obsession, remember? It’s become sort of a game to him, guessing at the colour, whether it’s lacy or not and if she-_le gasp-_might be wearing matching panties. Now that he’s paying closer attention, he finds himself catching glimpses of her underthings when her blouse shifts just right. Sometimes, like when she wears her ridiculously tight t-shirts, he can see the colour of whatever bra she’s wearing and they’re most certainly not all lace, but if she’d decided to wear a lace bra on the days she also wore a simple t-shirt or tank or even some of her plainer crop-tops, he’s treated with the sight of more detail peeking through the fabric.

So, it’s become a sort of guessing game for him. He never really knows if he’s right or wrong, not entirely, but, he does still enjoy playing. He only feels a little guilty and a lot creepy for keeping the game entirely one-sided, but there’s really nothing for it. He’s obsessed, remember? And it’s truly not all about the bras, either. He’s been wondering a little more at what kinds of things she likes to wear under her bottoms too…he’s pretty sure she tends to wear thongs because like…there are _no lines_ on _anything_ she wears, it’s sort of impossible, he figures, but she wouldn’t go around wearing nothing…would she?

He really doesn’t want to think about that.

Except he sort of does.

Regardless of his fixation with it all, he does admit that this is truly none of his business. She can wear whatever she likes and it is clearly just for her and Tony knows he needs to stop being such a creep, but he’s really struggling because now it’s not even about the lingerie, never really was in the first place. It’s about his overall inability to stop thinking about _her_, just…_her._

He’s well aware that their friendship wasn’t always as easy as it is now. At the beginning, they could barely stand to look at each other, let alone be in the same room together. It had taken time, patience, actual _verbal_ apologies and you know, more near world-ending disasters, but look! They finally made it. They’re great friends, they get along well with one another, they seek each other out for help or simply company. They’re _close_ and that’s more important to Tony than anything. He values their friendship and he knows she does as well. He sees it in the way she smiles at him, confides in him, spends time with him.

He’s grateful for what they have now, not just between them either, but with the rest of the Team, their friends. They’re more family than Tony’s ever known a family could _be._ He loves them all and yeah okay, maybe he’s started to admit to himself that it’s not just a crush or hero-worship when it comes down to Stevie. She’s more Stephanie Rogers these days than Captain America and he’s happy about that, because he _likes_ Stevie and sometimes he really does love-hate Captain America when they’re butting heads in the field, but those instances are so few and far between nowadays, so he’s not really worried about it. They all have nearly an alternate persona when they’re fighting together and they still mesh wonderfully.

Everyone has their strengths and they use them, with Cap’s leadership helping them make the most of a bad battle situation. It works and though the hero-worship thing has long since morphed into more of a _person_-worship, it’s no less worship on Tony’s part, just _different._ So, he’s come to terms with the not entirely a crush thing a while back, like…nearly two years ago, _alright? _He gets defensive when people point it out too, namely Clint and Natasha, but sometimes Bruce’s knowingly exasperated face will set him off too. Sam is just as bad, though he spends more time with Stevie and not him so he’s treated to his frustrated eye-rolling on a far less regular basis. He’s just glad Thor either continues to remain oblivious and generally unknowing or he simply keeps his mouth shut on the subject.

Loki, however, is another story entirely and Tony is grateful he and his brother spend much of their time out and about or back on Asgard so that the trickster can’t meddle nearly as much as he so clearly wants to. Parker on the other hand? Never seems to be able to _stop_ himself from attempting to meddle, even when he’s away at school and keeps his visits down to once a week or sometimes once every two. He’s currently away on a school trip, thank Thor and Tony is at least a little relieved about that. He’s due back in a couple of weeks though for finals and then he’ll be finished school for the summer. Which means he’ll be coming to stay at the Compound for most of the summer for his _internship_, which is really just an excuse on paper so that he can come play in Tony’s shiny workshops and also means he’ll be back to his meddling.

Tony knows the kid means well but _Christ_, he can be a real pain in the ass, always telling Tony to get his shit together and ask her out already. Tony wishes it were that easy and in theory, it _should be_. But it’s honestly anything but. Maybe one day, but today and not the day after and you know, the day after that probably not either.

Either way, Tony knows it’s not a crush he’s afflicted with, it’s the full-blown _L_ word and everything that goes along with it. Mainly, _feelings._ Which, let’s face it, he’s never been good at. But, he’s dealing with them, er, or _not_ dealing with them, depending on how you look at it. He’s…_managing_ them, let’s call it that. He’s managing his feelings for her and that has to be enough right now because he’s not sure he could take a rejection from her, not when he values what they have together now. She’s probably his best friend, aside from Rhodey, Happy and you know, Pep, but like…he doesn’t spend nearly as much time with them as he does with Stevie, so there’s that.

They’re friends, is the thing and he desperately does not want to risk losing that friendship because he caught _feelings_ or whatever, so he’s ugh, _managing_ them to the best of his ability. And it’s _fine, _really. He’s doing alright, even if he is plagued by thoughts of Stevie and the _what if’_s and such nearly 24/7. Which brings him to Saturday night and it’s shortly after 7:30 and the place is quiet, what with Nat and Clint running a mission for Fury, Bruce away for the weekend because he’d been at a lecture series that Tony wasn’t really inclined to listen to and Thor and Loki…somewhere that wasn’t here.

Stevie had been down in the workshop this morning sketching after her workout and after they’d had lunch together, Stevie had gone one way and Tony another. Tony had opted to skip dinner, just nibbling on whatever granola bars he’d had lying around while he’d pushed through the project he’d been so close to finishing and after that, he’d gone up to his room to shower, change and eat something a little more substantial. Which again, brings him to a little after 7:30 and he’s on his way to Stevie’s suite.

Jarvis had said she was in her apartment when Tony had asked and without a second thought he started off to her. He’d figured they could maybe watch a movie, share a couple of drinks or something and just relax. They did it all the time, usually with the others, but it wasn’t a big deal. They got on just fine by themselves too and if Stevie had plans or something, he’s sure Jarvis would have told him.

As it was, Tony was wholly unprepared for what happened next so hopefully he can be forgiven for his immediate reaction when he knocked on Stevie’s door.

There was a moment of quiet, Tony having just knocked, the sound loud in the empty hallway and he rolled back onto his heels and glanced down the hallway, hands now shoved casually into his jean pockets as he waited for her to answer. It was just on long enough that he found himself curiously squinting at the closed door. He was about to knock again, wondering if she was in the bathroom or something and hadn’t heard his knock, but then the thick door was opening and Tony was left standing there in flustered confusion.

Steve was smiling at him, but it looked a little strained, her bright blue eyes a little pinched at the corners and she was pretty well hiding behind most of the door. Tony was at a loss and he let his gaze sweep over what he could see of her, granted, it wasn’t much. Just her shoulder and face…the shoulder that was covered in a mauve coloured material…_wait…_Tony’s brain screeched to a halt. _Is that satin?_

He blinked, lips parting as if to speak, to say hello, _something. _But then Stevie shifted and his gaze snapped down to where her hip popped out behind the door and he could see that she was wearing a robe, the tie tied in a hasty bow, lopsided and uneven and his gaze trailed a little lower, finding her feet bare, her toes looking so innocent while the hem of her robe rest just above them, the back trailing against the cream coloured carpet.

“Tony, um, what brings you by?” She asked gently, voice curious if not a little flustered and she did look flustered, her cheeks pink and lips wet, eyes a little wide yet pinched and her hair…was perfect, really…she was perfect.

Tony blinked and watched as she tucked an errant curl behind her rounded ear and Tony’s cheeks heated so fast when the movement had her robe shifting-_opening_-baring her throat and further down, exposing a rather gorgeous cream coloured lace trim of maybe a bra, regardless, it looked a little too fancy for his company.

_Company._

Tony’s eyes widened in dawning horror and realization. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize you had company. My apologies, I’ll just-“ He jerked his thumb in the direction from which he’d come and quickly averted his gaze, not wanting to meet her bright blue eyes and risk her seeing the panic, the heartbreak, the sudden stinging rush of what might soon turn from heat to tears behind his eyes.

But Stevie seemed to realize what he must think and hastily rushed to explain, her eyes widening as she opened the door up more fully to him. “No company, Tony. It’s-it’s uh…just me.”

Tony blinked, gaze snapping back to her in question, brows furrowing in confusion as he seemed to flounder the response she was clearly waiting for. All he could do, however, was stare at her some more. Because now that she’d opened the door fully, he could see all of her. She had adjusted her robe again, closed more tightly now so that he couldn’t see whatever she had on beneath it, but his imagination had already started to run away from him anyway, so it wasn’t like it mattered.

His gaze slipped from the rather embarrassed expression she now wore to the rest of the apartment. From the door, he could see into the living area, the couple of sofas and that fancy wingback she’d asked him about ordering some months ago. The coffee table though…there was a bottle of red wine open there and a half-full glass of the stuff beside it along with a small vial of something sitting innocuously beside it. There was also a closed book on the coffee table and her open sketchbook there too, no pencil in sight. Over one of the sofas there was a grey throw. A gift from Tony, actually, just casually draped over the back and he could see one of the decorative(read: _useless_) pillows lying on the floor at the end of that same sofa. There also appeared to be soft jazz playing.

She’d clearly been sitting there, maybe drawing or reading, drinking wine and listening to music and had hastily gotten up by the looks of it…to answer the door for him and true to her word…she did appear to be alone in there. _Huh, _he thought. _Okay, so she was what…just sitting there by herself, drinking wine, maybe drawing and wearing…_his gaze swept back to her, finding her with her eyes downcast, cheeks pink and bottom lip drawn between her teeth as she let him look around to see that she was alone for himself. Tony raised a brow at her.

“Well-“ He cleared his throat gently when his voice came out a little hoarse. “Even if you don’t have company, I’m still clearly interrupting something, so I’ll just-“

He started to turn away from her, ready to wave off whatever she said next but then she huffed and shrugged her shoulder, her robe slipping and exposing the unblemished skin there, the strap of whatever she had on underneath now plainly visible. He swallowed hard, unable to look away.

“I was just…” She grimaced as she trailed off, clearly unsure of how to phrase whatever it was that she _had_ been doing. “Taking some me time?” She told him, nose scrunching up adorably as the words escaped her.

Tony barked out a surprised laugh, startling not only her but himself too. He quickly stopped himself, covering his mouth a little as he shook his head, murmuring apologies. “_Sorry,_ I wasn’t laughing at that or you or-“ He shook his head, trying to gather his thoughts. “That’s totally allowed, we could all use some of that. I’ll let you get back to it then, Stevie.”

Stevie’s gentle hand on his elbow had Tony stilling in his steps and he glanced up into her face as she met his gaze. “You could stay, Tony. I-it’s not a big deal, you’re not really interrupting much…why did you come by, anyway?”

Tony blew out a slow breath, thinking all of that over and attempting to think about how best to respond. Easy things first, he decided. “No one’s home…thought you might like to watch a movie or something with me,” He said honestly, choosing not to address anything else for the time being, like you know, the fact that she wanted him to stay while she was uh…wearing _that._

Stevie bit her bottom lip again and Tony tried valiantly not to watch her do it or at least, not let her see that he’d seen her do it. “Oh, well…we could watch a movie, if you wanted,” She offered, glancing up through her lashes at him.

Tony swallowed hard, thinking about the no doubt peaceful evening she’d had planned…maybe and he could kick himself for having interrupted it. “No, that’s uh-“ He cleared his throat lightly. “You had a quiet night planned, you don’t need to watch a movie with me.”

“But I’d like to,” She insisted. “If that’s what you’d like to do.”

It was so easy, the way she offered her company to him and Tony paused, looking and thinking in equal measure, his gaze slipping past her as she took a step back into her apartment, an obvious invitation if he ever saw one. Tony was torn, he wanted to spend time with her, but he also didn’t want to interrupt whatever she had been doing…he was also like 100% curious as to _what_ exactly that had been. He decided to be a little daring for a moment.

“How about…” He murmured, stepping into the apartment, hearing the door shut behind him as he headed for the wingback, eyeing the bottle of wine on the table. “We sit and enjoy some wine instead? We can chat or I could always work on my phone and you could…go back to doing whatever it was you were doing before I so _rudely_ interrupted,” He suggested, turning back to look at her as he stepped into the living room.

Stevie had come to stand behind the sofa and was currently eyeing him curiously, if not still a touch embarrassed if the light flush on her cheeks was to be believed. She watched him in silence for a moment, clearly thinking it over, gaze flickering back to the coffee table where her wine glass sat, it’s pair up in a cupboard with a few other treats she’d tucked away for special occasions.

She’d been quiet, however, for perhaps a moment or three too long and when she met Tony’s dark eyes, he was starting to look a little unsure and she really didn’t want him to leave because she’d been too nervous to accept his offer. “There’s another glass above the fridge…there’s also some scotch there too, if you’d prefer,” She accepted his offer, a soft smile playing upon her lips.

Tony’s shoulders dropped, only a hairs breadth, but Stevie tried not to smile outright at his obviously pleased nod and soft noise as he turned on his heel and headed for the aforementioned cupboard. Stevie watched him go for a moment and then turned her attention back to the living room, trying to gauge whether she had left anything incriminating out in the open or not. Relieved when she found nothing save for a pencil she’d dropped in her haste, she came around the edge of the sofa and bent to pick it up.

Unbeknownst to her, Tony had turned around just in time to see her bend to pick it up and was treated to the satin fabric of her robe stretching tight over her backside. He nearly groaned at the sight and forced himself to look away as he came back into the living room, glass safely in hand and scotch and other goodies he’d eyed left right where he’d found them.

When she stood back up, setting her recovered pencil back on the coffee table beside her sketchbook, her gaze slipped to Tony as he came to stand on the other side of the table. “Help yourself,” She told him, gesturing lightly to the bottle of wine, still mostly full, minus the glass she’d already poured for herself.

Tony poured himself a glass as well as Stevie turned suddenly and when she thought Tony wasn’t looking, she nudged the pair of cream high-heels she’d left in front of the coffee table, just that much further _under_ it to hopefully hide it from his sight. He’d noticed them before upon walking into the living room of course and when he finally took a seat in the wingback, he hadn’t failed to notice what she’d tried to do. When she turned from him then and started to leave, he made a curious sound, swirling the wine in his glass gently.

“Where are you going?”

Stevie stilled, one hand against the back of the sofa. “I was just going to go and change.”

When she turned her gaze back to Tony, she found him watching her with a raised brow and was wholly unprepared for the way he swept his gaze down and back up her frame before meeting her eyes once again. Her cheeks flushed when he next replied. “Why? I think you look perfectly lovely as you are.”

It was the boldness of his words that had her flushing more than anything, but she refused to let him ruffle her any further and arched a delicate brow at him in challenge. “Sure I’m not going to be too distracting for you?” She queried, turning back to him and gesturing to herself.

His lips quirked at the obvious tease and though it wasn’t quite a smirk, she could tell he wanted to grin at her. “You’re always a distraction,” He admitted simply, setting himself deeper into the chair, glass of wine raised to his lips and then _winked._

Stevie couldn’t help herself, she rolled her eyes in amused exasperation and took up her seat back on the sofa, casually noting how Tony spread his legs a bit when he sat down and her brain tried to scream at her, _he’s man-spreading in my favourite chair_ _while you’re sitting here in your negligee _and mentally tried not to freak the fuck out.

She made herself comfortable, laying back against one of the decorative pillows propped against the armrest before she leant forward to pick up her wine, cradling it carefully between her delicate fingers. When she met Tony’s eyes once more, she couldn’t help shifting to adjust her robe, making sure it hadn’t accidentally opened in any crucial places; it hadn’t.

Tony was a tad disappointed at that.

His gaze remained fixed on her and she tried not to blush or shift uncomfortably beneath his attentive stare. For all that it made her uncomfortable, she couldn’t help but revel beneath it, to know that she had his full attention right then. It was always a thrill to her when that happened. She enjoyed it perhaps a little too much, but she’d never tell him.

“Would you like me to change the music?” She tried to distract, taking a sip of her wine.

Tony hummed, having just sipped at his. He shook his head lightly. “No, I don’t mind it. This is your space, I’m just here for the company,” He admitted, smiling a little softer at her, his gaze softening in turn.

Stevie relaxed a little more at that. This was just Tony, even if there was no _just_ about him. He was her friend and they hung out in each other’s space all the time. This was fine. It would be fine._ Totally_. Famous last words.

Stevie hummed softly under her breath. “Alright then, what did you get up to this afternoon?”

Tony visibly relaxed and she felt herself relaxing more in turn. It was easy to get swept up in conversation together after that. Tony talked about his afternoon, telling her about the project he’d just finished and sent off to Pep to take a look at before it would reach R&D and Stevie took interest, listening and asking questions when she wasn’t sure about something. She always liked to listen to Tony talk about his work related projects and well, Avengers related projects too. Tony was interesting and that included his creations.

They fell into an easy rhythm, sharing their day with one another, even if they’d spent the morning together. They talked about their friends, namely Peter coming to stay with them soon. She always got on well with the kid, they were a pair together, despite the age difference. They hung out all the time when he visited and yeah, okay. Maybe Peter had a crush on her, but really, who’d didn’t? It wasn’t as if she led him on or anything either, they were just close and Stevie tended to bond easily with just about anyone so it hadn’t surprised Tony one bit when they’d first met and hit it off so well.

The conversation eventually petered out and a comfortable quiet had settled over them. Tony’s gaze slipped back to Stevie’s now empty wine glass sitting atop the coffee table and he watched as she seemed to contemplate pouring another…and then his gaze caught on the small vial beside the bottle. He raised a brow at it.

“Mind if I ask what’s in the vial?”

Stevie glanced up at him, gaze having shifted to the wine bottle as she thought about whether or not she’d like a bit more. “Oh, it was a gift from Thor,” She explained. “It’s Asgardian liqueur, you just add a drop to your drink and well, it’s a bit stronger than what we have here,” She admitted, chuckling softly.

Tony raised a brow. “It works, on you I mean?”

She nodded, smiling a bit as she shrugged her shoulder. “I think so? I mean, tonight was actually the first time I tried it and I didn’t want to go overboard, so I just tried one drop.”

She scrunched up her nose as if in thought a second later though. “Loki suggested three drops per drink.”

Tony made the same face. “Yeah, don’t do that.”

They shared a laugh at that and Stevie nodded, smiling softly to herself as she shrugged again. “I feel a little tipsy I guess? Just…more calm, _relaxed_,” She clarified.

Tony hummed thoughtfully, gaze sweeping over her frame as she conservatively sprawled across the sofa. He didn’t say anything to that, but he did get up from his seat to pour her another glass without prompting. Stevie watched as his fingers undid the small stopper on the vial deftly afterwards and then proceeded to place a single drop of the amber liquid into the freshly poured wine before offering her the glass.

She swallowed hard, looking up from the sofa at him and after only a moment of hesitation, did she reach out to accept it, their fingers brushing just the barest amount and making her shiver lightly. “You do look relaxed,” He agreed quietly, topping up his own glass, absconding wisely from the Asgardian liqueur. “But I think you could be even more relaxed.”

Stevie swallowed hard, gaze tracking his movements as he returned to the wingback, taking up his own lazy sprawl once again. _God_, but did he look good in that chair. She bit her lower lip as if in thought as he took a sip of his wine, his darkened gaze finding hers once more as he lowered the glass, holding it by the bowl almost carelessly as he let it hang down over the side of the armrest.

It was such a casual position but it spoke of a confidence Stevie was not entirely sure she could possibly possess, not right now at least. Not when faced with this incredible man seated before her. She pushed out a shaky breath and without breaking eye contact, took a long sip of her wine, enjoying the cool splash of liquid tasting of raspberries, blackcurrants, a hint of vanilla and leather. It was a good vintage and it should be, considering Tony only stocked the cupboards with the very best.

The silence continued between them but it wasn’t exactly uncomfortable. The music continued to play in the background, soft and sweet, having changed over from the jazz soundtrack she’d set up into something more classical. Her gaze slipped from where she’d been eyeing her swirling wine to settle back on where one of her shoes had shifted beneath the edge of the coffee table, one of their impossibly high heels poking out. She swallowed hard when she realized she’d been staring at it and although she’d held out hope that Tony hadn’t noticed where she’d been looking, she knew he probably saw it too.

Sure enough, when she looked up, she found his gaze already settled on the edge of the shoe. She stilled, glass half raised to her lips to take another sip, a light flush having started to spread down her throat and along her chest. She supposed the liqueur was doing its job with the way she was currently feeling…though, that could just be the headiness of Tony’s attention.

Tony hummed, drawing her gaze once more and she watched in nervous anticipation as reached forward and lifted one of her cream coloured heels out from beneath the table. When he arched a curious brow at her, she flushed a little darker.

“You always wear heels like this around the apartment?” He asked, genuine curiosity colouring his tone and though she knew he wanted to tease or well, he _should_ be teasing her, he wasn’t.

Stevie’s gaze flickered away from him for a moment, nervously swirling her wine again. She shrugged and Tony huffed lightly under his breath, so soft she barely heard it as he set the shoe down on the coffee table. She looked back to him nervously, only to find him watching her curiously, _earnestly._ She reconsidered her non-answer.

“Sometimes.”

“_Sometimes_, she says,” He chuckled lightly and it eased some of the gathering tension.

Stevie smiled a little, rolling her eyes. “Yes, _sometimes,_” She agreed. “When I’m having some me time.”

Tonys gaze met hers then and she found herself unable to look away. “And is this what you do during your _me time?_” He asked, genuinely curious again. “Lie here and read or draw, drinking wine, listening to music while looking regal and sexy in equal measure in your lingerie and the highest heels you own?”

Stevie swallowed hard. So apparently, they were doing this. _Talking_ about it. She somehow thought the subject wouldn’t be broached. She should have known better. Stupidly, oh so stupidly, she mumbled, “They’re not my highest heels.”

Tony blinked, momentarily baffled but it wasn’t until his eyebrows raised even higher that she realized what she’d said and then they both laughed. It took them a moment to settle but the slight tension remained. Tony _had_ called her sexy, after all. Though Stevie sort of enjoyed the way he’d said the word lingerie a little too much. The way it _rolled_ off his tongue had her wanting-

Yep, so not going there.

“That so?” He murmured and _damn it_, he sounded _interested._

This was bad, so, _so bad._

“Yes,” She said slowly. “Not that it’s any of your business.”

Tony hummed, nodding. “It isn’t, you’re right. I just find it interesting that you chose that part of what I said to focus on, instead of the fact that I find you _sexy,_” He explained and his voice was confident, nearing cocky territory, but Stevie knew better.

His bravado was merely for show and she knew that whatever this was between them was potentially relationship changing, _defining,_ even. She visibly shifted, the soft swish of her satin robe against her skin was maddeningly teasing and Tony found his gaze drawn to the way the flush along her cheeks and over the bridge of her nose seemed to intensify.

Stevie really didn’t know what to say to his comment and luckily, she didn’t exactly have to when he hummed, apparently having come to some kind of conclusion without her help.

“You know, I can see it, the appeal, I mean,” He conceded and Stevie blinked, not understanding.

When he failed to elaborate, “The appeal?”.

Tony’s gaze flickered up to meet hers, his deep brown eyes having wandered back down her frame, that thin satin robe barely feeling like a barrier at all beneath his heated gaze. “Taking time for yourself, relaxing in your…” He trailed off, smile tugging into a tentative smirk as he gestured to where she sat. “_Lingerie_.”

Stevie inhaled slowly through her nose. “How do you know I’m wearing lingerie?” She challenged, but her voice was weak, near faint.

Tony hummed thoughtfully, pausing for a moment. “I guess I don’t _know_, not for sure. But…let’s just say I have an inkling.”

Stevie glanced away at his knowing smile, raising her glass of wine to her lips to take a small sip. The wine really was getting to her and when she next lowered it, she set the near empty glass back on the coffee table beside her.

“So, you can see the appeal?” She tried to bring the conversation back on track, hoping to get away from the mention of her _lingerie_.

Tony shifted in his seat and Stevie tried very, _very _hard not to let her gaze track the movement of his legs. “I can,” He agreed. “It’s a private experience, probably feels rather sensual too, I would imagine. Getting all dressed up with no where to go, no one to please but yourself. _This_,” He gestured towards her prone frame once again. “Is just for you.”

Now it was Stevie’s turn to shift in her spot, her robe suddenly feeling too stifling beneath the heat of his gaze and her intense blush that just kept deepening. She glanced back towards him, meeting his gaze as she reached up to tug lightly at the edge of her robe in an attempt to cool her blush and unintentionally exposing her collarbone a little more. His eyes immediately dropped to the movement and subsequently, her bared skin.

“It is just for me,” She agreed quietly, watching him watch her with a nervous sort of anticipation.

She really hoped he didn’t notice her hands shaking.

Tony swallowed thickly and glanced up at her heatedly. “I’m sensing there’s a _but_ there.”

She bit her lower lip lightly and Tony’s breath turned a little harsher when she murmured, “But…it’s something else entirely when someones watching.”

Tony exhaled shakily, this timid thing growing too fast between them for either of them to even think about slowing down now. “I bet it is,” Tony muttered and then cleared his throat slightly.

His tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip and he was pleased when her gaze flickered the barest amount to the movement. “I’m rather enjoying watching,” He confessed, the first hint of vulnerability colouring his tone.

Stevie pushed out a slow breath, surprised and thrilled in equal measure by his confession. “You are?” She whispered, vulnerable in an entirely different way as she let the hand she’d used to tug open the collar of her robe trail down to loosen the lopsided bow that held it closed.

Tony’s gaze snapped back up to her eyes that were now dark with lust, holding her gaze with such heated intensity. “Yes.”

Stevie exhaled shakily as she tugged on the already loose bow, one side of her robe falling open to expose her right breast encased in the softest ivory lace. She shifted then, while both of her knees had been bent before, feet planted on the cushions, now she left only the leg closest to the back of the couch bent and stretched out her right.

And apparently it wasn’t just a bra she was wearing. It was an ivory teddy, very much see-through in places and Tony’s breath was _whooshing_ from his lungs instantly, entirely too loud in the relative quiet of the room. He was groaning before he could stop himself and Stevie’s entire being practically _lit up_ at the noise,the obvious _want _there. She only just managed to stifle her whimper at the hunger she could see on his face, his eyes darkening and practically _raking_ over her frame.

She broke his gaze only a second later when he shifted where he sat and she watched in startled arousal as Tony’s left hand came up to tug uncomfortably at his pant leg in an attempt to give his crotch some much needed room. She did whimper when she caught sight of the rather prominent bulge she could see stretching the unforgiving fabric of his jeans.

“Gorgeous,” Tony breathed. “Absolutely gorgeous,” He whispered, gaze now intently focused on her face and Stevie shied away at the praise, flushing deeply as she turned her head away to look at the dark television screen against the wall.

“Don’t shy away, pretty,” He murmured, voice soft and sweet and Stevie nearly choked on her next breath when he’d called her pretty.

She shivered at his soft chiding, turning back to look at him, though her gaze remained lowered, however, but Tony wasn’t going to stand for that. “Stevie?” He coaxed, tone soft and it reminded her too closely of Bucky right then.

The way he called her name, called her _pretty_ when they’d finally fallen into bed together and it was too much- “Can you look at me?” She heard Tony saying, interrupting her thoughts.

The warmth in his voice had her reluctantly raising her bright blue eyes to focus on his and she hoped he couldn’t see the tears that were building, the heat behind her eyes making her breathe shakily. But Tony’s gaze was reassuring and soft and she found her shoulders dropping a little, her next breath coming a little easier. This was Tony. _Tony._ “Is this too much?” He asked, voice still soft and sweet and concerned now too.

Stevie blinked, lips parting and she wanted to blurt out _no_ automatically, but she knew she should actually think about it for more than a split second to better determine her feelings right then. Tony deserved that and she did too, so she considered what he was asking her. _Was _it all too much? _Were_ the similarities between Tony and Bucky too much for her to let herself relax? That part perhaps was, but this was _Tony_, discernibly _not _Bucky. Tony wasn’t replacing Bucky, no one could replace him and Tony wasn’t like Bucky, not really. Sure, they shared similarities in that they were snarky, feisty brunet’s but they were two very different people. She would never confuse one for the other. Tony was Tony and Bucky was Bucky. That’s all there was to it.

She knew she maybe had a type, so it wasn’t exactly all that surprising that she’d fallen for the genius quite some time ago. Her gaze flickered over Tony’s frame, the comfortable, confident sprawl he was in and she found she really wanted to see where this would go, where it might take them. She shook her head slowly in answer to his question. “It’s not too much, Tony. I’m okay,” She assured, voice soft and maybe not as confident as she was hoping to come across, but it seemed to settle him regardless.

He smiled at her and it was the same sweet smile Tony always gave her, soft, kind, patient with an understanding there she never really understood herself. It helped though, the warmth in his eyes, the little crinkle she found there too. _God_, but she could just sit there forever and stare at him and somehow, _somehow_ she was quite sure Tony felt he could do the same with her.

“Thank you for telling me, Stevie,” He murmured, voice silky sweet and it made her heart ache, to know that he was pleased with her response, maybe just with _her._

Her cheeks were already quite flushed but Tony was certain they only darkened at his words. “You are beautiful, Stevie,” He went on after a moment. “You look so comfortable there, I can see the liqueur’s working on you. You’re much more relaxed, your skin’s all flushed too, even your arms,” He told her and when Stevie glanced down at herself, she could see that her skin was indeed flushed where her forearms peeked out from beneath the ridden up sleeves of the robe she still wore. “Do you feel relaxed, comfortable?”

She nodded and when he raised a brow at her she shuddered a little. He wanted her to use her _words_. “Yes,” She said, much too quickly and far too breathily.

“That’s good,” He agreed, expression smoothing out and lips curling into a smile with a devious edge.

She swallowed thickly at the absent way his hand twitched against his thigh and she thought he wanted to reach out and touch her then. Despite the distance between them. She wondered how long that distance would remain. Unsure herself whether she wanted the distance to remain or disappear entirely.

“Tell me how it feels,” He prompted quietly and when she merely blinked at him, lips parting as if she was about to question _how what feels?_ He explained. “The lace, tell me how it feels against your skin, your robe...the warmth of the liqueur m-...maybe the way I’m looking at you too.”

He seemed to hesitate over the last request but _oh_, she _wanted _to tell him those things, especially that. Now, if only she could bring herself to speak and not stumble over her words like she was sure to do. She swallowed hard and made a soft noise as she shifted, lashes fluttering to kiss the tops of her cheeks as she let herself sink back into the cushions and just _feel_, and just as he asked, she told him.

“Shivery,” She whispered, voice soft and quiet, but clearly loud enough for him to hear her properly. “The lace is delicate, it...it’s soft too and it almost tickles when I move,” She admitted.

“But it’s not quite a tickle, is it?”

“No,” She agreed, biting her lower lip for a moment before releasing it, knowing it was probably spit slick now and glistening when Tony’s eyes dropped to them.

She wondered if they were red with the amount of biting she kept putting them through. “My skin’s sensitive and the lace...the lace feels nice, _shivery,_” She sighed shakily then. “The satin is more ticklish, a little heavier than the lace and...and I’m so _warm_,” She confessed and Tony could see that, could see the way her skin was flushed and maybe a little shiny in places.

It wasn’t overly hot in the room, so he knew it was the alcohol and maybe a touch of arousal too. He hummed in acknowledgement, resisting the urge to tell her to take off her robe for him. When and _if_ she was ready, that would be her call, not his.

“You look warm,” Is what he said instead and then wondered if even that was too much of a push when she stifled whatever noise was trying to escape and turned her head away from him.

She toyed with the edge of her robe, lifting it slightly as if she were going to maybe fan herself with the fabric, instead, she shrugged her shoulder and the robe fell away even more, baring her bicep as it pooled at the crease of her elbow. She didn’t turn her gaze back to him when she next spoke, instead, she closed her eyes and breathed through her nose a tad roughly.

“When you look at me, it-it’s like I can feel the heat of your eyes dragging along my body,” She failed to suppress the embarrassed whimper her words prompted and Tony groaned softly under his breath, shifting in his seat.

“T-that’s good, sweetheart. You’re so good for telling me, Stevie,” He rushed to praise, listening to her bitten off little whimpers.

She finally opened her eyes a moment later, however, and Tony was met with her striking gaze, the darkness of her normally vibrant blue eyes not hampered by it in the least. The darkness he saw only made him wish he were that much closer, so he could see the flecks of gold and amber he knew to be hiding therein. He breathed out sharply through his nose as Stevie held his heated gaze with one of her own.

_God_, but she was beautiful like this. He’d never seen someone so beautiful before and it wasn’t just about the beauty of her body, oh no. She was intelligent, sweet and kind, _gentle_ in ways that still baffled him with all that strength he knew lay just beneath the surface. She was so caring and patient with the others, even with him and it never ceased to amaze him.

She was striking in every way you could possibly imagine. He loved her quick wit, her snarky attitude and though he’d called her out on it numerous times, her reckless bravery which he mentally called stupidity. Maybe sometimes he said it out loud too, but you know, only when he’d done something just as stupid and reckless and she was busting his balls about it.

But that was the thing. He _loved_ her. Every _goddamn _thing about her, even the little things that annoyed him to no end, he _still_ loved her for them.

“_Tony-_“ She whispered and Tony could see the way she visibly trembled beneath his heated gaze.

“I’m here,” He rushed to assure her, licking his lips as he attempted to form a coherent thought. “Just in my own head,” He admitted.

Her gaze softened a little in understanding and she let her hand come up to brush her knuckles against her collarbone, goosebumps spreading across her skin at the gentle touch. Tony’s gaze was still intense, watchful, but he tried to dial back on the lust, not wanting to overwhelm her anymore than she already was. _Christ,_ even he was feeling overwhelmed by it all. To have her here like this, to be _allowed_ _to watch_ her be so vulnerable and sweet and shy and utterly _perfect._

“Never seen someone so gorgeous,” He breathed, voice soft and full of something Stevie couldn’t put her finger on.

His words, however, didn’t have quite the desired effect. “It’s the serum,” She whispered, shrugging it off suddenly and Tony blinked in stunned realization.

“Is that what you think?” He blurted, unable to stop himself. “That the serum made you beautiful?”

Stevie shrugged again, glancing from him to where she’d folded her hands in her lap. “It’s true, though.”

Tony shook his head slowly. “I call bullshit.”

Stevie huffed, muttering _language_ under her breath, but Tony ignored her. “The serum didn’t make you beautiful, Stevie. I’ve seen pictures of you before it and you were already gorgeous, just packaged smaller.”

She chuckled a little at that, growing quiet when she let herself think back to that awful first meeting with Tony. The words, _everything special about you came out of a bottle _ringing loud in her ears but she’d never use that against him, not now, not after everything they’d built up between them.

“Maybe, never really drew much attention to myself so it’s not like I had men stumbling over themselves to compliment me. No, that came _after_ the serum,” She sighed.

Tony blinked. “What a cryin’ shame,” He murmured. “You were gorgeous then, I’m sure of it…they probably were just far too intimidated by your attitude.”

That got a laugh out of her, a genuine one and she smiled at him a touch ruefully. “That…_maybe_ had something to do with it,” She reluctantly agreed but Tony could see she was proud of herself.

“I’m serious though, Stevie. You are beautiful and I can say with certainty that it’s all you, not the serum,” He reassured.

Stevie looked away again and he watched with rapt attention as she breathed out slowly, that light flush returning with a rather abrupt vengeance to spread over her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. He hummed softly under his breath as she reached for her glass of wine to take a sip. When she lowered the glass a moment later, lips hovering at the edge of it, she murmured, “Thank you for saying so.”

Tony only smiled at her and winked and then when he thought harder about it, added, “So polite.”

She huffed, clearly amused and only barely resisted rolling her eyes as she set down her glass again, reclining back against the sofa. They were quiet for a few moments, just looking at each other, neither feeling the need to break the quiet as they let themselves look.

Tony could swear he felt the heat of her gaze as it swept along his frame and he wondered if she liked what she saw. He knew he wasn’t exactly a spring chicken anymore, but surely he didn’t look too terrible. Women still threw themselves at him from time to time, still flirted with him endlessly, despite having made it public knowledge that his days of being a playboy were far behind him.

People didn’t really seem to care, proclaiming the old _people don’t really change _schtick. It annoyed him to no end and sure okay, he maybe flirted back on occasion, but usually just to be polite. He never let it go further than that, however, always went home alone, never took their numbers, usually forgot their names before they’d even finished speaking. That sort of thing.

He didn’t exactly have a partner waiting at home for him or anything…except he kind of sort of did? Even if it wasn’t really like that. He had a family waiting for him at home, granted, sometimes they were out at those stupid events with him, but they’d always all go home together and that was something at least. The aforementioned _partner_ was wishful thinking on his part. Though sometimes when he’d return from a gala or charity gig he’d seek out Stevie instead of going to the workshop to sit with his bots or work on a project.

She’d always smile and offer to put on a movie with him or make him food when he’d complain endlessly about how terrible the little_ hors d’oeuvres_ had been and would give anything for some _real food, god damn it_. She’d laugh and they’d either order cheeseburgers or she’d make something. So, maybe not a partner to come home to, but someone special most definitely.

Which brings him back to the present, _does_ she like what she sees? He wants to ask her, but can’t bring himself to do so. Instead, he shifts in his seat, spreading his legs a little under the guise of getting more comfortable. It has the desired effect, the warmth of her gaze intensifying as her eyes dropped to the motion, exactly as he’d hoped. He watched with rapt attention as she drew her bottom lip between her teeth and began to tremble.

He decided to push his luck, letting his gaze wander over her gorgeous body, admiring the way her chest rose and fell beneath that ivory teddy, so delicate and sensual against her soft skin. The neckline wasn’t by any means plunging, but nor was it modest. It was built in a _v_ shape with thicker pieces of fabric that thinned out up over her shoulders. Pretty little thing, all delicate lace scalloping in a floral like pattern, see through mesh, also in ivory exposing her lightly flushed skin beneath it.

With the way she was sitting, he could clearly see part of her hip and _there_ was a much sharper _v_ that the bodysuit like lingerie came up over her hip, exposing the supple curve there, the slimness of her waist. He wanted to groan at the sight when she shifted and he could clearly see the way her abs tensed and flexed beneath her lingerie. He wanted to cry but for how pretty she was. He wished he could touch her, kiss her, _hold_ her if for nothing other than to feel the warmth of her body against his. It had been too long since he’d held another person that way and he missed it dearly.

She shifted, slowly at first and Tony didn’t realize it, but she’d been watching his face, watching him take her all in. He only realized it when she made a curious sound and sat up a little straighter, hands going to the half-on robe. She shifted it from her other shoulder and then paused.

Tony’s gaze snapped up to hers.

There was a questioning look in her eyes and he swallowed thickly and nodded. He expected her to perhaps slip her arms out of it, what he did not expect, was for her to slowly get up from her seat on the sofa. She stood only a few of feet away from him at the edge of the sofa and carefully slipped out of her robe, letting it fall to her wrists. She caught it and draped it over the coffee, but Tony didn’t notice. Too preoccupied with the rest of her now bared to him.

And he was free to look, he knew that. She _wanted_ him to look and really, he couldn’t bring himself to stop. She was quiet and still now, standing before him in nothing but that ivory teddy and he swallowed past the sudden lump that had lodged itself in his throat. He forced himself to drag his gaze from her body to settle on her face, noting the shyness in her eyes, the flush in her cheeks, the way her loose blonde curls hung about her, a few having shifted to drape over her breasts.

_God_, he wanted to groan at the sight of her. She had…_ample_ breasts, let’s put it that way. Curves that looked so soft and inviting. That little waist of hers was tempting all on its own and he did groan when she shifted, turning to show him her side a little. He tried to bite off his groan and didn’t entirely succeed as her gaze snapped up to his face, turning heated and so, _so _hungry. He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from talking. Because he would talk, there was no doubt about that.

He didn’t want to be crude, but _oh_, she had a lovely ass. He’d always thought so and though he tried not to stare too openly, it was known to happen from time to time. He could see the way her cheeks curved and _shit, _they were barely contained within that teddy, in fact, he was sure more of her cheeks were exposed than hidden at this point. He exhaled in a shuddery rush and Stevie’s lips quirked before she moved and move she did.

Gone was the shyness of before, that timid woman she’d been only a short while ago not exactly gone, _gone_, just…in hiding. She came around the opposite edge of the coffee table towards him and he looked up at her in awe as she approached. She stopped, only a foot or so away from him and he felt suddenly helplessly lost…and that was _before_ she sunk to her knees on the rug in front of him.

He exhaled roughly, knees shifting apart almost reflexively as she settled back onto her heels, looking anywhere but at him for the moment. He watched in shocked arousal as she placed her hands lightly on her thighs and ducked her head slightly. She wasn’t between his legs, but rather beside him, his hand twitching yet again against his left thigh as he fought with his desire to reach out and touch her.

She still wasn’t looking at him though and she kept licking her lips as if she were attempting to work up the nerve to speak. He knew that he needed to say something, tell her she was being _so good, so perfect, so beautiful on your knees for me,_ but he couldn’t bring himself to say anything at all.

“Tony,” She whispered and it was a whisper, barely a breath of a word and Tony couldn’t help himself.

He reached out to her with a hand he refused to admit was shaking and carefully ran his fingers back through her curls. Her head tipped instinctively to the side to follow the touch and then she _shuddered_ when his nails lightly scratched at her scalp. Her head tipped forward as if she were trying to hide from him and he swept his hand from her hair to lightly lift her chin up so that she could look at him. Her eyes remained downcast, however, and he gently touched her cheek with his thumb.

“Look at me, Stevie,” He murmured, gently tracing the line of her jaw.

He could feel her swallow before she slowly dragged her gaze up from the floor and he was met with her guarded, yet shy pretty blue eyes. “You have beautiful eyes,” He confessed, not wanting to startle her with anything above a whisper.

She didn’t look away from him and instead merely blinked as she looked up at him through her impossibly long lashes. “T-thank you, Tony,” She finally managed to whisper.

He hummed softly under his breath and with great reluctance, he let his hand drop back to his thigh. She seemed to sway forward a little as his fingers left her skin and he swallowed thickly in an attempt to steel himself and keep from reaching back out to her, despite very much wanting to.

“So polite,” He mumbled absently and was rewarded with her cheeks flushing a darker shade of pink.

“Can I-“ She cut herself off, seemingly losing her nerve to continue.

Tony raised a brow at her curiously. “Can you what?” At this point, he’d let her do just about anything she damn well pleased.

She huffed a little, gaze straying to where his hand rest against his thigh. “I just…wanted to know…” She started, clearly stalling before she took a deeper breath and met his gaze. “If I could rest my head on your thigh…I just…want to be close.”

Tony blinked, caught off guard. It was such a simple request and he carefully raised his hand from his thigh. “Of course you can,” He agreed easily and before he’d even finished giving her his permission, she was shifting closer on her knees.

She glanced up at him nervously before she seemed to say _to hell with it_ and carefully laid her cheek down against the top of his thigh, exhaling shakily as she made herself more comfortable. By making herself more comfortable, she ended up curling a hand over his thigh while he attempted to relax beneath the gentle weight of her head on him.

Her blonde hair fell in loose curls over his lap as she kept her head turned away from him and he couldn’t resist it any longer. He gently swept calloused fingers over her long locks, cupping the back of her head with his warm palm and he felt the tension slowly start to drain from her body. It was beautiful, watching her shoulders drop, not even realizing until then that she’d been rather tense. But it wasn’t until his hand found the back of her neck and he gave her a gentle squeeze did he watch the rest of her tension positively melt away from her frame, leaving her loose and relaxed and so, _so _pliant.

He inwardly groaned at the sight, how submissive she was being for him and he was not one who usually found himself drawn to the more dominant and submissive side of things, but this was beautiful. He exhaled shakily when he felt her soft exhales through his jeans and it didn’t take long for him to settle into the careful stroking of her hair, the sound of her soft, steady breaths.

“I’m having a really hard time not talking about this,” He finally admitted, a heavy breath escaping him.

Stevie huffed softly and although he couldn’t see her face, he knew she looked amused. “I don’t doubt it,” She agreed. “But…”

Now it was Tony’s turn to be amused. “But…I don’t want to ruin this…whatever this is…so…”

He paused and Stevie’s cheek shifted against his thigh and he knew she was smiling. “You’re not going to talk about.”

“No,” He conceded. “I’m not.”

They fell into an easy quiet after that and Tony could not only hear, but feel Stevie’s pleased hum against his thigh. Tony continued to pet her hair, gently running his fingers through her golden strands as he reached with his free hand to pick up his discarded glass of wine, still mostly full thanks to having been distracted by the blonde sitting at his feet.

_Christ,_ but she was sitting at his _feet!_ He’d never in a thousand years thought that he could have something like this and yet, _here he was._ He sipped at his wine and let his gaze wander over her frame. From here he could see the length of her back, the slight curl she was in, the way her bare feet were nestled, overlapping behind her bottom. He inwardly groaned at the sight of the lace stretched taut there, her hips bare. He wondered if she was comfortable like that and glanced to the floor. He wishes they had put a pillow down for her to kneel on instead of just the rug.

He’d be sure to remember for next time.

He paused his petting at the thought, but when Stevie made a questioning noise deep in her throat, he carded his fingers carefully through her long locks once again. “Sorry,” He apologized, trying to relax back into the wingback. “Was just thinking.”

She hummed softly against and he felt her squeeze his knee a little in comfort but didn’t ask what he might be thinking about. He let it go for a moment and blew out a slow breath as his hand trailed back along her neck, pushing her hair over her shoulder to expose her neck and upper back. She shivered and he thought she might be cold, but that flush was still rather present, so he didn’t ask. When she shifted after a moment or two, he caressed her shoulder comfortingly.

“Make yourself more comfortable if you need to,” He murmured, hand still lightly carding through her longer locks, fingertips skating along the back of her neck and shoulders on occasion.

She hummed softly and Tony breathed easier when in the next moment she shifted to sit closer to the chair, her bum now planted on the rug and her legs pressed together curled up beside her. She stayed with her cheek resting against his thigh, one of her warm hands still settled on his knee, her other he could feel the warmth of it settled against his ankle.

They stayed like that for quite some time and eventually Tony realized that Stevie had fallen asleep. He’d started to doze himself with the warm solid weight of her body so close, the sound of her steady breaths in his ear. Tony didn’t know what tonight had been about exactly, but it was beautiful all the same. If this is all he would ever have of her, he’d be grateful for it. He knew he was in love with her, but he wasn’t stupid. Men like him never got women like her. It just wasn’t in the cards for him.

Eventually he coaxed her awake and told her to head to bed. She didn’t protest, but she did linger at the edge of he living room as if she were going to say something. When she didn’t, Tony merely smiled at her from his spot by the door. “Have a good night, Stevie. I enjoyed spending time with you tonight,” He told her, voice soft and quiet and he watched, feeling pleased when her cheeks flushed a little darker and she smiled back.

“I enjoyed spending time with you as well, Tony,” And that had been that.

Tony had gone to bed, though not to sleep and although he thought things might be a little awkward or strange between them thereafter, there was nothing awkward or strange about it. They still hung out together, they still teased each other, they still annoyed each other and things were fine. They were easy and great and even though Tony wanted to press, wanted to ask her _what the hell are we doing here, Stevie? I’m so gone on you and I’d give anything just to sit with you and look at you and tell you how beautiful you are and-_

He didn’t press and no one commented on how they seemed to stand that much closer when they were in the same room or how Stevie laughed just a little lighter when he was around or how Tony smiled wider and seemed more happy than ever and for that they were both perhaps a little too grateful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are we enjoying this so far? ^_~
> 
> [ko-fiandfanfiction](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/ko-fiandfanfiction)


	11. Chapter 11

One afternoon a couple of weeks after that unexpected evening, Tony was coming up from the workshop, chattering with an overexcited Peter, when they bumped into the rest of the Team in the kitchen making lunch together. “So it’s really okay for me to have MJ and Ned come over tonight, that’s okay?” Peter was asking and Tony was only half paying attention to the kid because he could see Stevie leaning over the edge of the counter talking with Sam and smiling so beautifully and _Christ_, he really was gone on this woman.

Her whole face positively lit up when she was excited or happy about something and Sam was clearly enamoured by her passion for whatever they were currently talking about and he really needed to actually pay attention to what Peter was asking him because if he didn’t everyone was going to see his love-sick puppy dog eyes.

“Of course you can have them over, kid,” He agreed, chuckling softly and drawing a few of the others attention.

They murmured their hellos and Peter _whooped_ lightly and then flung his arms around the genius and Tony huffed a laugh and patted the kid on the back. When he’d finally been released, he was faced with the others smiling, but he was far more interested in the sweet adoring look Stevie was giving him before she’d thought to hide it. Tony just shrugged lightly and smiled bashfully as he headed for the coffee maker to put on a pot.

“You’re having your friends over tonight, Pete?” Stevie asked, the young genius having come over to her after hugging Tony to drape his arm around her shoulders and scooch in close.

Tony marvelled at the pair. They were always so close, not just physically, but emotionally too. They got along so well and Tony thought it was sweet, how Stevie would sling her arm around Peter’s shoulders and hug him close while they walked or chatted or how Peter would go out of his way to hip-check her and throw his own arm around her shoulders whenever the opportunity presented itself. Like now, seeing as she wasn’t a head taller than him what with her leaning over the kitchen island and all.

“Yeah, think we’re going to build this lego model Ned’s been on about for a month. MJ is less than thrilled about helping, but we’re going to watch a movie and eat junk and you know, _relax_ now that classes are done,” Peter explained, smiling happily as he took up a seat beside her.

“That’s great, I’m sure you guys will have a good time. I think I’m just going to have a quiet night in,” She went on and Tony’s brain did a sort of skipping record thing.

A quiet night in…? He cut his gaze to where Stevie was now back to chatting with Sam, Peter listening along intently as they talked about Sam leaving…Sam…leaving. Tony blinked. That’s right. He was only stopping in for the day and then he was headed out to visit his mum and if his memory served him right…he glanced over to where Clint and Natasha were eating their lunch, dressed in their gear…those two were going to be heading out shortly as well.

Thor was…not there and Bruce was visiting Doctor Cho for a conference they were apparently meeting up for…and that meant…Tony’s eyes cut to where Stevie was looking at him with a timid smile on her pretty face, still listening to Thor while Peter joined in on the conversation, her input not needed at just that moment.

Tony swallowed thickly as Stevie held his gaze for another moment. “Maybe you’d like to watch a movie with me, Tony?” She suddenly asked. “Only if you’re not busy, of course.”

Tony blinked. “Sure, I’d love to. I’m never too busy to spend time with you, Stevie.”

Stevie smiled at him and when she turned her attention back to Peter who had started to go on about this Lego Millennium Falcon they were going to be building and interjected, “You mean the ship from _Star Trek_?” Tony about passed out from the restraint it took not to burst out laughing at the very much pained expression Peter suddenly wore.

“Uh, well…_actually-_“ Peter started to correct, but was quickly interrupted by Sam with his exasperated snort.

“She’s fucking with you, man,” Sam told him and Peter’s brows furrowed adorably as he looked up at Stevie curiously.

Stevie continued to look wholly innocent, but Tony knew better and clearly so did Sam. Peter’s nose scrunched up as he cocked his head, looking at her incredulously. “_Are_ you just fucking with me?” He blurted.

Stevie blinked innocently and then gave the kid one of her patented Cap’s disappointed in your shit looks. “Watch your language, son.”

Just about everyone in the goddamn kitchen _groaned_ in unison, Peter’s cheeks flushing absolutely crimson. _That’s _when she cracked, a wide grin gracing her lips as she reached out to card her fingers through Peter’s dark curls, making him huff petulantly and attempt to get away from her ruffling fingers. “You’re so easy, Petey-pie. Couldn’t help myself.”

Peter rolled his eyes but he was smiling, so Tony figured they were good, especially when Peter hip-checked her and she drew him into her side once more, smiling and laughing together as they got back to chatting with Sam before he needed to head out.

Tony was already distracted from the conversation, Stevie’s _invitation_ weighing heavily on his mind. He swallowed thickly at the idea of showing up to her apartment only to find her dressed similarly to the last time he’d been there. He was so distracted with thoughts of Stevie in her negligee that he accidentally spilt hot coffee on his hand while he attempted to pour himself a refill.

“Motherfu-“ He inhaled sharply at the sting and before he quite realized what was happening, Stevie had his hand cradled carefully in her grasp as she tugged him towards the sink and then blissfully cool water was sluicing over the back of his hand and wrist.

“_Tony-_“ Stevie breathed, voice laced with worry and he glanced up into her gorgeously concerned face.

She was looking down at his hand with furrowed brows and pursed lips as she tilted it gently this way and that to get the water exactly where she wanted it and he found himself blinking at her in befuddlement. How had she gotten to him so quickly? She’d been well across the kitchen and Christ, but he hadn’t even heard her _move_.

He glanced down to where her careful fingers were grasping her wrist and watched as her other hand came up to curl two of her fingers beneath his fingertips to raise them up a bit to better wet them beneath the stream of water. She was being so gentle with him and for a moment he just stopped and stared. It wasn’t until he glanced back up into her face that he realized she’d probably been trying to get his attention for more than a hot minute. He blushed, catching sight of her exasperatingly fond smile she shot him, the brightness in her eyes and the crinkling at their edges.

_Damn it_, that look was too sweet. He cleared his throat. “Sorry, what?”

Stevie’s eyes only crinkled more at his apparent blunder. “I _said,_ you should be more careful, Tony. What’s got you so distracted that you would waste your precious coffee?”

Tony downright pouted at this, he really hadn’t meant to spill it and he glanced back to the coffee machine where yep, there was quite a spill on the floor and counter top. His pout turned fierce. Stevie chuckled, soft and fond and Tony glanced back up into her pretty face.

“I didn’t mean to,” He insisted, tone petulant and Stevie’s smile softened further.’

“Of course not,” She agreed, shutting off the water and picking up a fresh tea-towel from the drawer.

Tony watched as she patted his hand dry careful, turning it this way and that and Tony’s gaze strayed to the red blotches that mottled his skin. It wasn’t a terrible burn by any means, but it did sting and his skin wasn’t quite what it used to be. He grimaced a little at the dry pat of the towel over his too-sensitive skin and Stevie murmured a soft apology, pulling the cloth away.

“I have some ointment for burns in my apartment, if you need it,” She offered, slowly letting go of Tony’s hand.

He instantly felt bereft of her warmth and he exhaled shakily while he tried to reorient himself, pulling his hand back to himself to examine it a little closer. He huffed, shrugging a little. “It’s not that bad, no need to baby me,” He scoffed, turning away from her slightly to go back to the coffee pot.

He missed Stevie’s eye-roll and the rest of the groups-who had actually all gotten rather quiet during the whole incident-Tony cast a surreptitious glance around to them when he didn’t hear a word out of anyone, only to find their gazes averted elsewhere. He narrowed his eyes speculatively and made the mistake of glancing back to Stevie...who was giving him the biggest puppy-dog eyes known to man.

Tony’s heart melted and though he didn’t realize it, he’d started smiling...that entirely too-dopey and smitten kind of smile that was just as lethal to Stevie as her puppy-dog eyes were to him. “Okay fine, go get your ointment, you giant golden retriever puppy,” He muttered, shaking his head...but...he was still smiling and only smiled brighter when Stevie’s eyes practically lit up and she nodded, already half-way out the kitchen to get the ointment.

Tony rolled his eyes and when he was certain she’d gone, he turned to face the others, wagging a sore finger at them in annoyance. “_That_, was uncalled for. You know that look is absolutely too much for anyone to withstand.”

Peter snickered softly into his hand and the others really were no better, laughing lightly as they started getting up to head off to do whatever it was they had planned for the day ahead of them. Once they’d all cleared out, Sam waiting by the stairs to catch Stevie before he left, Tony was left to wait for her to come back into the kitchen. He relaxed at the kitchen island, sipping his new mug of coffee timidly, carefully keeping his burned hand and wrist out of the line of fire should there be another unfortunate accident, when he could hear Stevie saying good bye to Sam in the other room.

He straightened in his seat a little and then she was wonderfully in his sights once more. She approached him and took a seat beside him, already unscrewing the jar of ointment and setting to work with it. “I washed my hands after I grabbed the ointment, is it okay if I apply it for you?”

Tony blinked, outstretching his hand to her tentatively. “Sure, why not.”

She smiled, pleased as she settled in a bit more, dabbing the tip of her ring finger into the jar to scoop out some ointment. He watched as she took up her task, carefully spreading and dabbing at the reddened skin with the ointment and it was like a balm, soothing his skin almost instantly. He visibly relaxed in her light hold, letting out a soft sigh.

“Better?” She asked, a slight quirk to her lips, gaze intently focused on her task.

“Much,” He agreed, huffing as he suddenly shook his head.

“What?” She queried, curious about his reaction.

“You asked me what had me so distracted,” He sighed, smiling a little to himself as he watched her.

She hummed, gaze still focused on her task. “I...was thinking about you,” He confessed, tone soft, voice quiet.

Stevie’s moments stilled, but only for a moment and Tony tried to keep his pleased smile at bay at her reaction as she went back to coating his skin. “Is that so,” She murmured.

Tony hummed. “It is...I was so distracted-“ He glanced around the kitchen briefly to make sure that they really were alone before whispering, “Thinking about the last time we had _a quiet night _in that I burned myself thinking of you in your negligee.”

“_Tony!_” She suddenly spluttered, her pretty pale cheeks flushing intensely with her sudden blush, faltering in her task of applying the ointment for a moment.

She was smiling at him in embarrassment and Tony smirked before winking at her. She flushed impossibly darker at this and Tony’s gaze softened. “You asked me what had me so distracted,” He admitted, shrugging lightly and glancing away.

Stevie huffed, gaze dropping to where she was still cradling his hand carefully in hers. She smiled, though obviously still embarrassed as she resumed her task, dry fingertips caressing lightly over the unblemished skin of the back of the brunet’s hand. Tony shivered at the unexpected touch and he glanced back to her, her gaze trained on his hand.

“I did ask,” She conceded, voice soft and quiet and when she looked up at him suddenly through her lashes, head ducked shyly with that sweetly shy smile playing on her lips, Tony’s heart felt like it stuttered in his chest at her next words. “I also asked you to come up and watch a movie with me later.”

Tony swallowed thickly. “You did,” He agreed, gaze unwavering.

“And you said yes,” She reminded him.

“I did,” He agreed, voice impossibly steady.

“Do you mind if we actually _don’t_ watch a movie?”

“Do I still get to come up to see you?”

“Of course.”

Tony licked his lips and it was immensely gratifying when her gaze dropped to the movement before snapping back up to his. “Then I don’t mind at all.”

She flashed him one of her sweetly pleased smiled and then carefully settled his hand back down on his thigh, now carefully covered in ointment. “Great, I’ll see you later then, Tony. I’ll tell Jarvis when I’m free.”

“Okay,” Tony choked, voice suddenly hoarse as she started off towards the stairs.

She smiled at him over her shoulder and as soon as she was out of sight, he sank back onto his stool, exhaling roughly. “I’m screwed, J, aren’t I?”

Jarvis’ silence merely made Tony shake his head. “Thanks, buddy.”

“You’re very welcome, Sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone had a great holiday. <3 Happy New Years! I'll be attempting to update more often, I swear. Life just has a funny habit of getting in the way. ^_~


	12. Chapter 12

That night had been rather wonderful, Tony thought, looking back on it nearly three months later. He’d shown up to her apartment with a bottle of wine, comfortably loose fitting black sleep pants and matching button-up shirt, sleeves pushed up to his elbows, his moccasins and a smirk that was only half teasing. He’d been petrified, wondering where that night might take them, but excited for it nonetheless. It hadn’t exactly escalated much from the first time, however, not that Tony was in any sort of hurry to change anything. He was plenty happy as is.

He’d arrived and found her in the kitchen pulling down wine glasses for them. She’d been dressed in an ivory robe and he revelled in the fact that he’d soon be treated to what was _under_ said robe. She’d smiled at him coyly and gestured with the glasses and it’d been so damn easy after that. They’d settled down after, Stevie on the sofa and Tony in his chair.

_His_, chair. Because it was undoubtedly his now. He’d watched her that evening as she’d shed the robe, leaving herself in a pale blue teddy made up of lace and silk and it was most certainly soft if the way she’d kept running her fingertips along the spot on her left hip as she sipped idly from her glass was anything to go by. They’d chatted off and on, Tony slipping into silence more than a few times as he let himself get lost in just looking at her gorgeous self. That second night soon turned into a third and then a fourth and over the next few month things began to change for them.

She hadn’t gone down on her knees-he blew out a rough breath at the thought, for him since that first night until the fifth time after they started…whatever the hell this was. She’d shed her robe, a forest green one this time and instead of taking up her spot on her sofa, she’d walked straight to him, her eyes flickering down to the floor and Tony had reached instinctively for the pillow on the floor beside him…and then placed it at his feet.

She’d virtually melted as she sank to her knees so fluidly and it was a wonder Tony didn’t come right then, his cock twitching heavily in his pants at the sight. It was a struggle most evenings spent with her, not to palm himself while he looked his fill, not to try and take the edge off while she sighed and _breathed, _smiled and looked up through her lashes at him. It was a testament to his self control that he never touched himself explicitly until he was safely back inside his own apartment, leaning heavily against the front door, hand hastily shoved down the front of his pants, fingers wrapped tightly around his cock as he stroked himself off, that he even managed to wait _that long _was a sure feat.

He wondered each and every time if she’d pleasured herself the second he’d left her apartment. _God,_ but he hoped she did. He knew she wasn’t exactly unaffected by their little meetings, she had a tell and it always made him heat up, made him crazy with want whenever she gave herself away. Knowing that she was aroused and because of _him_, it really did a number on him, just saying.

Her hands would flex, thighs tensing and Tony’s eyes would snap down to the muscles there, taut with tension and then she’d let out this soft little noise, like a sweet kitten mewling for its mother. He would find himself having to resist the urge to thrust up into nothing, just wanting that bit of friction on his oversensitive cock, hard and usually leaking in his sleep pants, no doubt dirtying them even further by then. Not that he wouldn’t outright ruin them by the time he had his own hand shoved down the front of them.

Thinking about how sweet she’d get never failed to rile him up, didn’t matter where he was or what he was doing. All he had to do was think of the picture she made settled down on that cushion on her knees for him, skin flushed, lips parted and spit-slick from her licking or biting them, her eyes wide, _round_ and so damn blue, drawing him in like a moth to a flame.

But _oh,_ she shone brighter than any flame he’d ever met.

But despite the meetings, despite her more comfortable demeanour around him both between them and when they were around their friends, their teammates, it never progressed any further. He’d only touch her head, caress her hair or shoulders…her arms and ankles on occasion. But they’d never kissed, never touched with _intent_ before. Tony didn’t deny that he wanted to and he was quite sure she did too, but this was just so damn easy, _comfortable._ And sex complicated things…didn’t it?

He swallowed thickly at the thought. Sex with Stevie…he’d be a lying liar if he said he’d never thought about it. _Anyone_ would be a lying liar if they said they’d never thought about it. This was Stephanie Rogers, _Captain America._ Of fucking _course_ you’ve goddamn thought about it. At least once.

He huffed a little, wondering just why it was that neither of them had attempted to go further. Lord knows their friends had since caught on to their new camaraderie, the side-long glances, the sweet knowing smiles they shared were anything but covert. They weren’t _spies_ and both entirely failed keeping their dopy smiles in check no matter how hard they tried. Part of the reason they were both last resort for any kind of undercover work. They really were rather terrible at it.

So yes, sex complicated things…er, but…maybe it didn’t have to? Natasha had said as much. So did Clint. Though, to be fair, Tony’s not sure how much he trusts Clint’s point of view on most things…Natasha though? Yeah…he’s sort of more inclined to believe her.

He sighed, glancing down at the specialty chocolates he’d brought along with him. He hadn’t made plans with Stevie to meet tonight, most of the Team around someplace, but Tony wanted to see her and he thought, _well,_ he thought it couldn’t hurt to stop by and see if she wanted to share a treat with him, maybe watch a movie, _without_ her dressed in lingerie. He didn’t want to pressure her, but he wanted to show her that they could still be in each others space without that simmering arousal and alcohol clouding their senses. Even if she rarely used the liqueur anymore and he rarely finished an entire glass.

He exhaled shakily and came to a stop in front of her door, the hallway quiet around him. “She still in her apartment, J?”

There was a pause before, “She is…but I might advise against visiting at this time, Sir.”

Tony blinked, caught off guard. Because that was strange thing that, Jarvis sounded _worried._ “What?”

“Miss Rogers is…”

When Jarvis didn’t continue he spluttered, eyes widening in concern. “Is she okay? Is she-“

“She is…_physically_ well.”

Tony shook his head, incredulous and downright concerned now. “Let me in,” He demanded, reaching for the data reader to override the lock he was sure to find there.

“I would still-“

“_Jarvis-_“ He whispered, voice nothing but a hissed warning.

The sound of the lock disengaging was startlingly loud in the quiet hallway, Tony holding his breath as he braced himself and then pushed open the door. He hastily shut it behind him, Jarvis locking it once more and Tony looked around nervously.

The living room was rather dark, at least, darker than he usually saw it. There was a table lamp on near his chair, but the rest of the lights in the apartment, including the kitchen, were out. He blinked, eyes attempting to adjust and then his gaze caught on movement by the floor to ceiling windows across the room. The chaise lounge she usually kept in her studio was brought out to rest in front of the windows and was otherwise occupied.

He blinked, eyes still adjusting and caught sight of movement once again. The windows weren’t blacked out, they were letting in the light from outside, the light of the moon and one of the lamps just out of sight giving off a faint glow and illuminating the space.

Tony’s gaze dropped to the figure draped across the lounge and he could finally make out the graceful slope of her back, the stretch of her arm as she placed a glass of what he would venture a guess to be wine…next to an empty bottle on the floor. He kept his spot at the door, not wanting to intrude if she was truly okay, but Jarvis had made it sound like-

He stilled upon hearing a soft whimper, choked off and abrupt and there was a clink and Tony realized she’d knocked over the half-empty glass onto the rug, the bottle of wine too, hence the clink. Her whimper came again and Tony found himself taking a step towards her.

He must have made some kind of noise because in an instant sharp blue eyes were turned on him as she looked over her shoulder at him. They were striking, even in the darkness and he inhaled sharply as his steps faltered at the sight of her. She was looking at him with the most devastatingly heartbroken look he thought he’d ever seen on her pretty face and he’d absolutely _murder_ whoever made her-

“_Tony-_“ She gasped and her voice was wet, choked, her next whimper barely stifled.

Tony’s brows furrowed, worry and concern and fear overtaking him. He was beside her in an instant, before he’d even registered the will to move, even. She turned onto her side facing him as heapproached, her hands reaching for him and Tony dropped down to his knees before her, her hands grasping weakly at his t-shirt. He let her, whispering soothing nonsense as he caressed her hair, drawing her in close.

“_Hey,_ it’s alright, Stevie. It’s alright, I’m here, what’s wrong? W-what do you need? Tell me what you need,” He attempted to console, but Stevie either didn’t hear him or simply couldn’t respond.

Her hands remained wound tightly in the fabric of his shirt as terrible sobs began to escape her, choked whimpers and her harsh breath so loud in the otherwise quiet apartment. Tony didn’t know what to do, what was wrong or what had upset her, so he simply held on, winding his arms around her middle and drawing her in close to him, cradling her head against his pec as he cooed soothing nonsense to her, hoping to get her to settle enough to tell him what was wrong.

He let himself look around as he held her, noting the empty bottle of wine, the glass that had been half empty now tipped over, its contents staining the carpet…the nearly empty vial of liquor from Thor, it’s stopper lying empty on its side on the carpet too. His brow furrowed deeper and deeper the longer he let himself look, his gaze sweeping over her feet, legs bare up to the middle of her thigh where the hem of her night shirt had ridden up.

Her night shirt. It wasn’t anything like he’d seen her wear before. It was white, buttons all the way from hem to her collarbone, only the left side of which remained exposed with a couple of buttons left undone at the top. It looked soft and it was, he realized, caressing down the length of her back soothingly. It reminded him of an older men’s dress shirt, especially with the way she had the long sleeves cuffed and rolled up to her elbows. In fact, he glanced down between them and saw the pocket over her left breast, it _was_ a men’s dress shirt, oversized, especially on her, but then again…that might be the point.

He held her tighter against him, nose nuzzling her temple as her warm breath came in soft pants against his chest. She was no longer outright sobbing, despite her tears having soaked through his t-shirt, but for that he was grateful at least. “Stevie?” He murmured, voice quiet. “What’s got you so upset, huh?”

Stevie tensed in his arms and Tony immediately regretted saying anything at all as she started to try and pull away from him. “Hey, come on now. It’s just me,” He murmured soothingly, coaxing her back to where she’d been settled against him.

She seemed to fight with herself for a moment, deciding whether she wanted to fight him on it and pull away or stay safe and secure there. When she slumped against him a moment later as if all the fight simply drained out of her, Tony breathed out slowly in relief.

“I'm sorry-“ She choked, voice rough and hoarse, making him wonder just how long she’d been crying before he’d found her.

“Nothing to be sorry for,” He consoled, hand sweeping down her back and back up to card careful fingers through her golden hair. “You’ve just got me worried is all.”

Stevie made a soft noise against his chest and Tony frowned, carefully drawing back in an attempt to look at her properly. He managed, but she kept her face downcast and even with her puffy cheeks, the terrible tear tracks and the angry red blotches from where she’d been rubbing her face, she still looked so goddamn beautiful.

“I’m sorry,” She mumbled and Tony shook his head, that’s not what he had wanted to hear from her at all.

“Don’t be sorry, sweetheart,” He murmured and grimaced slightly, he hadn’t meant to call her sweetheart.

She choked on a soft sob and Tony’s ams wound around her a little tighter. “But I _am_,” She stressed, pushing back a little from him, apparently determined to set him straight.

Tony let her and met her gaze, unsteady though it was. “You f-found me like this and I-I’m-“ She grimaced and Tony noticed that she was slurring her words a bit. “I’m so-“ She choked, shaking her head. “I’m _drunk_ and _crying_, I’m s-so _pathetic-_“ She practically spat.

Tony bristled. “_Hey, _that is not-don’t call yourself that, you’re _not,_” He admonished, pushing her back a little, his hands moving to grasp her biceps firmly.

He resisted the urge to squeeze them and blew out a rough breath. “You’re having a bad night, that’s all. You’re allowed to get drunk, you’re allowed to cry, you’re allowed to do both at once, _Christ,_ lord knows I’ve had bad days like that too, Stevie.”

Stevie was frowning at him, still unsure, still very much drunk but at least she wasn’t crying her gorgeous heart out anymore. “I sh-shouldn’t be-“ She grimaced and then unlatched one of her hands from his shirt to gesture at herself. “Like this, I’m C-Captain America-“

Tony sputtered, indignant. “You’re also Stevie Rogers, honey. You’re allowed to have bad days.”

She frowned, sinking back a little, one of her hands still clutching weakly at his shirt while she dropped the other to the chaise. “It was a bad day,” She agreed, voice quiet as her gaze dropped to where she was grasping his shirt.

She gently released it and Tony tried to breathe normally as she smoothed her palm over the no doubt crinkled material in an attempt to right it. He caught her wrist in his hand, her gaze slowly dragging itself up to meet his. All she could see there was concern and adoration, _worry_ and it made her own heart ache in sympathy. She didn’t like having people worry over her.  
“I…lost Bucky 70 years ago today…I-“ She swallowed heavily, her breath a heavy exhale. “I let him fall, it-it’s my fault he-“ She shook her head, a fresh wave of tears escaping her, pretty face contorting as she tried to contain her sobs.

Tony’s brows were pinched as he watched her break down in front of him. He’d…in the years they’d known each other, he’d never seen her like this, never seen her so broken down before. He shook himself out of his stupor and quickly drew her against his chest, murmuring soft words of reassurance. He hoped his soothing caresses down her back helped at least somewhat. He trailed his palms over her shoulders for a while, up and down her spine, caressing through her hair. He’d do anything to make her stop crying, to not feel this kind of pain. He was sure he could never take it away entirely, however. He was all too familiar with the pain of loss, the pain of losing a loved one.

They stayed like that for quite some time, her quiet wracking sobs and his soft consolations the only sounds in the apartment for what felt like hours. Tony had shifted up onto the chaise after a while, his knees aching something fierce, his heart too if he were being completely honest.

He held her, rocking her gently in his arms as he thought about what this incredible woman had been through. She blamed herself for Bucky’s death and that, that was not okay. It had been Hydra who was responsible and no one else. They would never have been on that train if it hadn’t been for Schmidt and his goons. Tony shut his eyes as he held her, he couldn’t believe she was blaming herself for Bucky’s death, not after all of this time.

“It wasn’t your fault,” He whispered for the hundredth time, lips pressed to her sweaty temple as he held her, _cradled her_ to his chest, hoping that she not only heard his heartfelt words, but felt them somehow too.

Stevie made an absolutely _wounded_ noise against his chest when he said those words a little louder and Tony’s grip tightened around her. “I’m so sorry, Stevie. But you have to know it was not your fault. His death…that, that was on Hydra, not you, Stevie. Not you,” He said firmly.

She shook her head, clearly wanting to fight him on this but Tony gripped her arms firmly, forcing her to look up at him as he pulled back. “It was not your fault, do you hear me? Do you think he would blame you? Do you honestly think he would blame you for this?”

Stevie blinked, her usually bright blue eyes bloodshot and glazed from drink and tears. She didn’t answer him at first, merely stared at him as she took a moment to think about it. She knew that Bucky wouldn’t blame her for it. Deep down in her bones, in her heart, she knew he would never blame her for what happened that day. It didn’t stop her from blaming herself even now, however.

“He-“

“He wouldn’t,” Tony said firmly, with all the conviction he had. “He was your best friend, Stevie. There’s no-“

“We were lovers,” She blurted suddenly, voice nothing but a whisper and Tony stilled, unsure if he had heard her correctly…and somehow knowing that he had.

She’d never…she’d never given voice to what they had once been before. Tony had had his suspicions, had heard and read stories before, but…she’d never said anything to refute those claims, though to be fair, she’d also never acknowledged them before. Everyone had their suspicions, but to hear his own confirmed, it moved something within him. How was he ever to compa-

“_Tony-_“ She whispered suddenly, drawing his gaze.

He found her looking up at him with those usually bright blue eyes still swimming with tears. He didn’t know what his face was doing, but it couldn’t be anything good. She shook her head slightly, her hands coming up to cup his cheeks, thumb swiping lightly over his chin. “I loved him and I failed him,” She confessed, her lower lip trembling as she fought the urge to cry harder.

Tony shook his head gently. “It still wasn’t your fault,” He murmured, voice quiet, shaky.

Her lower lip wobbled dangerously. “I _failed _him, _me, _Tony. I can’t-I couldn’t-“ She shook her head, unblinking as she stared at him, attempting to steel herself for whatever she was going to say next.

Tony didn’t expect her next words to be what they were, however. “I can’t fail you too.”

Tony’s brows furrowed in confusion. “Why would you-“

She leant into his space suddenly and Tony was wholly unprepared for her lips to meet his in that moment.

Tony barely managed a breath as her lips met his. Her lips were trembling and he could taste the salt of her tears between them and he _hated it_.

He didn’t let himself think about it, carefully grasping her cheeks in his hands, hoping that the warmth of his palms reached her, if nothing else. He searched her face, finding her eyes closed and when her lashes finally fluttered, her startling blue eyes looked resigned, not hurt, not rejected, just…_resigned_. To what exactly, Tony wasn’t sure. He had a feeling he was going to find out, eventually.

“You can’t-you can’t fall in-“

Tony’s gaze turned sad then. “I’m afraid you don’t get to tell me what to do, Stevie. Not off the field,” He murmured, brushing some of her hair out of her face.

He watched as more tears escaped her, wetting her cheeks again and he swiped a thumb gently through them, wiping them away. “But I can’t-you can’t-“ She shook her head, dislodging his hands for a moment and he let them fall to the space between them.

“We can,” He murmured, so soft, so tentative, so unlike his usual self.

She faltered at that, gaze wide and he wished her eyes weren’t so imploring. He wasn’t sure he could ever deny her anything, if she so asked. But, she wasn’t asking.

“_I_ can’t,” She whispered, blonde brows pinched as she gazed up through bleary eyes at the man before her. “Don’t you see?” She whispered, one shaking hand coming up to cup his jaw, thumb smoothing over the soft hair of his goatee.

What Tony saw was a woman who had survived against all odds, who still rose and fell with the Sun and the Moon as sure as they rose and fell with each new day, each new night. What Tony saw was a woman who would deny herself the pleasure of living without being free to love, _allowing_ herself the freedom to love because she thought she maybe didn’t…_deserve _to? Because she felt she’d _failed_ Bucky?

Surely that wasn’t what she truly felt?

Tony’s gaze swept over her features, the sadness in her eyes, the longing and just…he couldn’t take it. He leant forward, her lashes fluttering, eyes closing at his close proximity. Tony pressed his lips to her furrowed brow, placing a gentle kiss there and murmured, “What I see, is a woman fighting with her heart, blaming herself for something she did not choose, something she could not have foreseen…something she had no control over.”

Stevie blinked, bright blue eyes opening as Tony pulled back, his breath hot against her cheek as he bent to press a kiss there. “You did what you had to do then and I only want you to do what you feel, what you want to do, now…”

Stevie blinked, her bright eyes practically glittering in the darkness. “But?”

Tony smiled, but it was somewhat sad as he brushed his knuckles against her reddened cheeks. “But not while you’re like this. Not when you’re hurting like this,” He murmured, voice quiet and sincere.

Stevie’s lashes fluttered briefly before she fixed those bright eyes on him again. She nodded and Tony relaxed as she dragged the tips of her fingers along his jaw, over his goatee, nails scratching lightly there.

“Okay,” She whispered, barely more than a breath of sound as she nodded again, more firmly. “Okay.”

Tony smiled gently at her and glanced towards the windows, the night sky lit up by the moon, the clouds hovering low around it. “It’s late, darling. I think you should get some sleep.”

Stevie didn’t protest when Tony helped her up, careful not to let her stumble in her slightly drunken stupor. She wasn’t bad off, but she most certainly was far from her usual self. She did try to wave him off at the entrance to her bedroom, but he wasn’t having it, ushering her inside and getting her into bed, obviously not quite the way he’d hoped for them one day, but beggars can’t be choosers and all that.

He wasn’t satisfied until she was curled up in bed on her side, blankets drawn up over her shoulders, lights down low, a glass of water on her nightstand and a granola bar there too. Her eyes were already heavy and he smiled down at her as he readjusted her blankets for the tenth time in as many minutes.

“Get some sleep…I’ll see you at breakfast. We can…talk about this when you’re feeling better…or not, if that’s what you want,” He offered, visibly forcing himself not to adjust her blankets yet again and instead take a step or two away from her.

She smiled at him, though there were still tears in her eyes, still a slight wobble to her lip. “We can talk about it, Tony. When I’m feeling better,” She agreed and Tony’s shoulders sagged with relief; he hoped she wouldn’t forget.

“Right, well. Let’s see how you feel about that in the morning,” He conceded and was relieved when she let out a soft chuckle at that.

“I’m sure it won’t be a pleasant morning,” She admitted and Tony smiled a little lopsidedly at her. “But I will want to talk to you…when I’m feeling more myself.”

Tony was obviously pleased by that.

What they’d unfortunately _both_ been wrong about was being able to talk about what had happened and it wouldn’t have been for lack of trying on either of their parts. In fact, that next morning, after Stevie had arrived late to breakfast with a bit of a ghostly pallor to her cheeks, Tony had smiled and plopped a cup of coffee down in front of her and she had smiled gratefully up at him, placed a hand gently over his and sighed out a, “_Thank you, Tony. I-I’d like it if we could meet maybe later today…after dinner maybe and…talk?_”

And even though she’d phrased it as a question, unsure and nervous, Tony had jumped at the chance to reassure her. “Of course we can, I never got to give you that chocolate I picked up for you. I’ll stop by around 7, how’s that?”

She’d agreed and well, they never did get to meet and share that chocolate. There had been an emergency that afternoon at SI and Tony had had to fly out to meet with Pepper in Malibu to take care of it and Stevie…well, things definitely didn’t turn out the way either of them had hoped for.

While Tony had been taken away on business, there was a disaster of a mess to clean up back home and though the Avengers insisted they could handle it-in the beginning-Tony really had wanted to be a part of it, even then, but respected their wishes. If they had it handled, then they had it handled. But when he received a late night phone call half-way through the week from Stevie sounding so far removed from her usual self, distant in a way he’d certainly never heard her sound before, he was flying home without bothering to wait for a jet within minutes; completely ignoring Pepper’s pleas for him to stay.

“_Tony, i-if you’re still awake, I just wanted-if you get this-just…could you…never mind-_“ Tony had never suited up so fast in his life.

The way she’d sounded was unlike anything he’d expected of her and he was wholly unprepared for the reasoning behind it upon arriving home later that night. Nor was he prepared for the sight that greeted him upon walking into the communal kitchen.

Natasha was standing in the kitchen clad in sleep pants and an oversized SI sweater, back pressed up against the fridge door, gaze trained on the floor at apparently nothing in particular with Clint perched up on the countertop beside the stove in a pair of track pants and a ratty tank top, head in his hands as he stared down at his knees. Bruce was seated at the island counter with a blanket draped around his shoulders staring into a mug of what was probably tea, only the lack of steam made him wonder if he wasn’t wrong about that. They all looked positively _exhausted._

Thor was no where to be seen for the time being, probably still off world and there was…Sam…sitting on the floor in sweatpants and a white t-shirt, back to the cupboards with…_Stevie _sitting across from him.

Tony’s whole world narrowed down to focus on nothing but the blonde. She was hunched over herself, arms wrapped securely around her knees as she practically white-knuckled her bare shins. She was in nothing but a grey t-shirt and black athletic shorts and it was…March.

That’s when he noticed the bruises. His gaze snapped back to the others, noting the bandage on Natasha’s bicep, the cut above Clint’s eye, the bruise on Sam’s cheek…and the horrible bruising along Stevie’s thigh…her forearms purpled and mottled terribly. Her face remained buried in her arms, her curtain of golden hair shielding her from his prying gaze.

He was going to say something, break the unnatural quiet of the usually loud space, but he found he couldn’t, not when Stevie’s head lifted slowly, her gaze settling on him. She looked weary, strained, exhausted. But there was a desperate edge there, a helplessness that he was not prepared for in the slightest. Her sudden inhale made him go unnaturally still and then her lips were parting, brows drawing together as she held his gaze and said his name.

He knew the others had heard her call his name, but he didn’t register their movements, their soft greetings. Eyes and ears only for Stevie. He wanted to hear her, he did, but he did not expect what she said next to suddenly change everything between them.

“He’s alive, _Tony…_Bucky is _alive_.”

Those six words. Tony hadn’t been expected that, but he, he had to help in any way he possibly could. Whatever that meant. When he dropped down in a crouch before her, he reached out to grasp her hands as she reached for him at the same time. He cradled them to his chest and held her gaze firmly.

“Okay, okay,” He whispered, attempting to soothe her, watching as she seemed to visibly struggle with what to say next, tell him what she needed to tell him next.

He couldn’t even begin to understand what this all meant, let alone what she might be thinking, how she might be handling this. How did one handle this sort of thing exactly anyway? There couldn’t be a protocol for this kind of thing. _Hell_, he wasn’t even sure what exactly _this kind of thing_ was just yet.

“Okay,” He said again, tone firm as he turned to look at Sam who had moved to crouch beside him, hand gently clasping over Tony’s shoulder. “Somebody better tell me what’s going on and preferably from the beginning.”

Sam blew out a slow breath, turning his worried gaze on Stevie for a moment. When Tony did the same, Stevie nodded gently in Sam’s direction and Tony shifted, sitting down on the floor with them. Might as well be comfortable…er, somewhat comfortable for whatever he was about to hear. He gave Stevie’s hand a reassuring squeeze when she shifted a bit closer and Sam made himself more comfortable at her side.

Tony didn’t know what he expected to hear, but this sure as hell wasn’t it. They didn’t have a lot of intel currently, but none of it was good, that was for sure. SHIELD was corrupt, they knew that much. Hydra had somehow infiltrated it and had been running amuck for Christ knows how long and they needed to put a stop to this yesterday.

Natasha filled in a few blanks while Clint helped. Bruce was pretty quiet during the whole conversation, but he was a calming presence and right now, that’s exactly what they needed. Actually, Tony had never been so pleased to have Sam-of all the most annoying people-there to help keep Stevie calm and she was calm, eerily so. It was strange, the way she kept staring at Tony or nothing in particular, like she wasn’t really there, wasn’t really hearing anything. A detached sort of presence that made Tony’s skin prickle uncomfortably.

Tony wasn’t sure how he would have managed this himself, hearing this, finding out that your long lost-

He pushed out a rough breath, hands flexing as he felt Stevie shift beneath his palms. “So he’s been held…captive and brainwashed for the past seven-_seventy years-_“ He breathed, gaze flickering towards Stevie’s face, but she wasn’t looking at him, instead staring at where his hands rested over hers.

“By _Hydra,_” He said slowly, having to pause to collect himself. “And he’s what, been sent on Stevie here as some kind of sick fucking jo-“

“_Tony-_“ Natasha said, a plaintive note in her voice and he snapped his jaw shut with an audible click.

“We’ve got a bigger problem than his current target being Captain America,” Sam sighed, drawing Tony’s incredulous gaze once again.

“_Project Insight_,” Sam said simply and in the span of a breath, Stevie was no longer the quiet woman torn apart by her grief, the realization that the love of her life was still fucking _alive_ even after all this time.

“We have to stop it from happening,” Stevie muttered, voice hard, firm. “We can’t let it happen.”

Tony’s gaze stayed fixed on her, the conviction, the adamancy of her tone. She was staring right at him, tone serious, face cold. There was that detachment there that he really didn’t like. As if she were compartmentalizing herself, becoming Captain America and hiding away Stephanie Rogers. He understood it, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.

“Whatever it is, we’ll stop it…and, we’re going to track down, Bucky.”

Tony knew that was something he couldn’t promise, so he didn’t promise it, not exactly. But he was going to do anything and everything in his power to make it so, no matter the cost. So, he sent the others to get some sleep, to which they all gave him the _as if_ face and then they moved down to the workshop to better plot out their plan of attack.

Of which included the not so highly recommended nor entirely thought out plan of sending Stevie in to SHIELD headquarters with the sole intention of _getting information and being as covert as possible while doing so, _ie. going undercover but like, _not._

It went as well as to be expected, of course.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a bit of a non consent warning here guys. Sorry. No actual rape happens, but there is the threat and some unwelcome touching. I promise it gets better. I love my happy endings.

It’s not going well. They’d all hoped it would have gone better than this, but currently, they’re all trying not to snap at one another over the comms as Tony works his hardest on devising a plan to break into SHIELD without Stevie’s big beautiful brain to assist him. Nat’s under cover too at the moment so she’s out and Bruce is…he’s busy. So, it’s currently Tony, Clint, Sam and[they’d had to call in the kid]Peter doing their level best to keep level-headed as they broke into SHIELD headquarters with the least possible damage and casualties, to you know, fucking _rescue _Captain America. _Fuck,_ where the hell was Thor and Loki when you needed them?

Needless to say, things were not going well.

…

It was dark, Stevie was coherent enough to know that much. She felt sluggish, dopey, worse than when she got drunk the week before. She grimaced at the thought of the headache the morning after she’d endured and tried to blink a few times to see if the room she was in would come in to focus any better. It didn’t. Wherever they had her, it was a dark fucking room.

She shifted, at least, she _tried_ to shift her weight from one side to the other in an attempt to gauge her body’s responsiveness. When she failed to do more than shuffle, she heard the slight clink of metal and she was sure she could feel the heavy weight of cuffs at her wrists, ankles too.

_Great, just fucking great_, she thought, blowing out a slow breath as she attempted to collect herself. She listened for any sounds around her but came up short. No voices, no vibrations, barely even the rustle of air as it passed through a vent off to her left. She closed her eyes, her lids already heavy to begin with. She knew she must have been drugged, but there wasn’t much she could do about it at the moment.

She forced her body to try and move again and only succeeded in tensing her leg muscles, but man did they ache something fierce. Whatever they’d used on her was not your typical knock-out juice. She tried to take a deeper breath and suddenly ended up choking, coughing and spluttering when her chest lit up with pure fire. But _goddamn_ did that hurt.

Her breath seized in her lungs as she struggled through the pain, trying to parse together _why_ they hurt so badly in the first place. It didn’t take long before she recalled.

The elevator.

_Right_, the whole fucking thing that had led her to being here in the goddamn first place. She’d had a meeting with Director Pierce and it…it hadn’t gone too well. She didn’t like anything he’d had to say, but she’d nodded along, smiled and murmured her _yes, sir’s_ and been on her way. Which is how she ended up in the elevator with the entire fucking _Strike Team_ practically breathing down her neck.

They had absolutely no intention of letting her leave the building and she had put up one hell of a fight. Right until fucking _Rumlow_ had managed to get that goddamn syringe lunged into her neck. But not before she’d broken his nose.

She smirked at the thought and was startled when the lights suddenly came to life nearly blinding her in their brightness. She squeezed her eyes shut with an uncomfortable grimace and tried to get her bearings, feeling as if she were about to fall over with the sudden disorientation the light had brought her. Probably concussed then.

She heard the sounds of locks disengaging and then the clang of heavy metal and the screech of door hinges and just as she was blinking open her eyes, adjusting to the harsh light of…the containment cell they had her locked away in, Rumlow and a few recognized members of the Strike Team waltzed in.

.

Tony was absofuckinglutely _livid_ at this point. Not only had they not heard from Stevie when she’d been scheduled to make her check in, but her fucking suit tracker had stopped pinging under Jarvis’ watchful eye somewhere in the interim. So again, Tony was fucking _livid._

SHIELD was on lockdown and Tony was all over that shit. Peter was in the vents within a matter of minutes while he attempted to keep the Team on the down low as they worked to figure out what the fuck happened exactly. Nat was still busy and not due to check in for another forty-five minutes so it was just the four of them with Bruce on standby if absolutely necessary. Tony really hoped he wouldn’t be necessary, but they wouldn’t know for a little bit yet.

He grimaced at the thought and muttered into his comms for a sitrep, to which the others responded…and then Tony heard it, the chatter over another channel he’d managed to hack into.

“_Got her in containment, can you believe it? Took all of two dozen men, but we did it._”

“_Course we fuckin’ did it. But did you see those guys? Christ, Bill’s never going to walk again, neither is Mitchel._”

There was laughter on the line and then, “_No shit, seriously? Oh well, suppose they took one for the Team, I’m headin’ in to see what’s what, you meetin’ us or watchin’ from the hub?_”

Tony bristled. Watching _what?_ He did not want to find out. “Kid, please tell me you’re making progress.”

“_Yeah-_“ Came Peter’s breathless reply. “Got a lock on Cap’s suit, the tracker’s live, just can’t be seen outside because of some kind of block. I’m assuming it’s the damn concrete-“

“Has to be more than just concrete,” Tony muttered absently, Peter humming his agreement.

“Probably, yeah. Regardless, the tracker is in the basement-“

Tony rolled his eyes. “Course it is, let me know if you run into any trouble. Remember, just watch, get me a location and I’ll get her and you, outta’ there.”

“_Copy_,” Peter whispered.

.

“Glad to see you’re finally awake. Thought we may have dosed you with a little too much tranq.”

Stevie inhaled slowly as she blinked the men into focus, her eyes settling on Rumlow and his smug grin as he stepped up in front of her. He was all confident swagger and it was disgusting the amount of smug satisfaction that was dripping off the man. She felt a curl of satisfaction at seeing the blood stains beneath his nose herself, however, and the half-assed tape job he’d done to himself.

She’d known him for the last three years, worked with him, gone on missions with him, even most of the men here in this room, come to think of it. They’d gotten on well enough, though sometimes she really did wish they could keep their eyes to themselves. They’d never done anything untoward to her and the few times she’d overheard them talking about her hadn’t been…_that_ bad and she’d taken petty revenge on the few who had something to say about her by casually mentioning something they were doing rather poorly. She’d revelled in the slight payback, even if it was petty. She inwardly grimaced. She’d never expected them to be Hydra though, not even an inkling. She hated herself for it. How had she not _known?_

She breathed in deeply and with her next exhalation, released the tension building in her shoulders. She needed to focus and think through this carefully and logically. Don’t let emotions get involved and all that.

“You really must like the sound of your own voice, Rumlow,” She sighed and only barely resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the man.

Rumlow chuckled, apparently not taking the bait as he shook his head, crouching down in front of her. “Still hanging on to that high and mighty shit, I take it? Well, we’ll change that soon enough.”

She watched him coldly, head feeling heavy on her neck as the aches and pains really started to filter in. They must have really done a number on her after she’d gone down because she was pretty sure she didn’t have quite so many broken ribs and you know, _bones_, before she’d been tranqued.

“Nothing to say, Cap?” He prompted.

Stevie didn’t bother deigning him with an answer, letting her eyes go heavy lidded as she watched him, mentally cataloguing her body’s response to her flexing her extremities, measuring her pain, cataloguing all of her injuries and how the serum appeared to be working against the tranquilizer running through her veins. She hummed softly, gaze sweeping over him and then the others as she lowered her head a bit, but even that took effort. She counted the number of weapons she could see on their persons and was already attempting to formulate some kind of a plan that didn’t involve waiting for backup. Not that she didn’t think they were coming or anything, but yeah. She still needed a plan.

Rumlow huffed and suddenly shoved her right shoulder hard, slamming her back against the metal chair she’d been chained to. She breathed sharply through her nose, attempting to ignore the flare of excruciating pain and merely met his challenging stare. He clicked his tongue at her and punched her hard in the ribs.

The breath was instantly stolen from of her and she grunted with the sudden white-hot pain that spread through her already broken ribs and she really hoped they didn’t puncture a lung. Spots were dancing before her eyes as she attempted to blink and breathe through the pain, only barely managing to keep from gasping out. She was panting by the time she managed to get her bearings and Rumlow was now standing over her with a dirty grin plastered across his face.

“How’s that feel, Cap? Like each breath is a fight? Like breathing with razorblades in your lungs, I’d bet.”

Stevie huffed, still panting but she’d managed to get a handle on her breathing enough. This was bad, sure, but she remembered what it was like not to be able to breathe at all during an asthma attack in the middle of the night and she revelled in the ability to breathe _at all_ at the moment.

“I-I could do this all day,” She breathed, her words coming in soft pants but audible to Rumlow and the rest of the men.

Rumlow made a face, scowling at her viciously and Stevie smiled, lopsided and probably bloody of course but she smiled anyway. She’d been ready for the punch when it came, but it didn’t stop the sting, the spreading ache in her jaw where she would definitely have a nasty bruise bloom. She knew she had at least one black eye with the sting she felt there and the no doubt enormous amount of swelling nearly obscuring her vision on the left side was more than enough confirmation.

“You’re a real piece of work, aint’cha, Rogers,” Rumlow sneered and Stevie laughed, choked and hoarse as she forced herself to summon the strength to turn her head to focus better on him.

“And you’re one ugly son of a bitch, Rumlow,” She drawled back and was rewarded for her troubles with a sudden hand in her hair.

He tugged her head back roughly, his blunt nails scratching at her scalp and leaving stinging trails of fire behind as he gripped her even harder and _yanked._ This time she did gasp and it hurt so goddamn much as she was forced back, her neck straining at the awkward angle as he shoved his face in close to hers.

The pained grimace she wore only shifted into disgust when she got a whiff of his nasty breath, her nose screwing up in distaste as he breathed into her face. “You think you’re so goddam better than there rest of us, Cap,” He hissed, shaking her roughly by her hair and making her choke slightly on her next breath.

“M’ better n’ _you_,” She managed to mutter and Rumlow spat at her before dropping her head and taking an angry couple of paces away from her, practically growling in his frustration.

Stevie attempted to right her breathing with the slight reprieve, ignoring the wetness against her cheek as she focused her breathing, pushed her pain down and ignored the way her vision was swimming more than just a bit.

“You really do think that, don’t you?” Rumlow asked, though he clearly wasn’t expecting a response as he barrelled on. “Well, there’s another thing me and the boys will set straight then, won’t we?” He asked, turning to throw a leer at the others.

When the six other men in the room started laughing and muttering their agreement, Stevie let her gaze track over their frames a little more carefully. She swallowed hard when she caught sight of one of the men palming his front deliberately, while two others adjusted themselves in their uniforms.

Her gaze dragged back to Rumlow where he was watching her with that insanely smug look on his face and _Christ_, but she hated that look. What’s worse, she was pretty sure he’d seen her looking at the other men and noticed their current state of what she hated to admit was arousal.

But surely they wouldn’t resort to that? She swallowed hard and held Rumlow’s gaze, her expression turning stony as she clenched her jaw from the number of nasty things she wanted to say to him. Getting emotional right now was not something she could afford to do.

Whatever they planned to dish out, she could take it, she could fight it, she knew she could. She had slowly been flexing her toes, attempting to curl them in her boots and they were responding, slowly but surely and it was only a matter of time before the serum would do its thing and she’d be back to normal. She just had to hide how her body was recovering and hope they didn’t pick up on anything unusual and dose her again.

“Yeah, figured out where this was going did you?” Rumlow teased, striding back towards her.

She didn’t reply and merely let her still bleary gaze focus on him as he stepped in front of her. She barely avoided a flinch when he took hold of her jaw, digging his fingers in to her flesh roughly as he gave her a shake. She grimaced a bit at the sudden wave of vertigo she experienced and blinked a few times in hopes of making the room stop spinning.

When it finally did, Rumlow was _tsking_ at her and shaking his head. He shoved her back against the metal chair and she dropped her head a bit to breathe sharply through her noise and will the overpowering nausea down. She looked down the length of herself, her head heavy on her shoulders and noted that she was still clad in her stealth suit, her boots and where the metal mag cuffs had her secured to the chair…that was definitely bolted into the ground somehow.

Her wrists were pinned down by her sides, the mag cuffs there secured by a ring below the chair she couldn’t see, but any time she moved even the barest amount, she heard it clink and shift against the concrete floor. She lifted her eyes once more and the starkness of the blue there had Rumlow inhaling slowly as he looked her up and down with interest.

“You know, you’ve never had an issue with talking before, Cap. I’m really starting to take offence here,” Rumlow sighed, all faux disappointment colouring his tone.

Stevie only just barely avoided the urge to scoff, instead clenching her jaw even tighter as she tracked his movements around the room sluggishly. It was taking all of her effort to even do that much. Her body really wasn’t responding the way she needed it to right now. She hadn’t really paid much attention to anything else in the room, save for the men and it wasn’t until two of the others shifted, that she realized they’d been blocking a small black box of some kind.

“Well, I suppose I’m going to have to make you talk then, can’t very well drone on and on without us getting anywhere, now can we?” He sighed, walking towards the box and popping it open.

She wasn’t sure what she expected, honestly, probably some torture equipment, maybe. She’d been dead wrong about that, well, sort of. It _was_ torture material, but not the kind she’d originally expected.

“Do you know what this is?” Rumlow asked, lifting up a manilla folder and waiving it at her.

She didn’t bother to reply and Rumlow sighed deeply, all put upon as he came back towards her and stepped into her space. “No?” He queried, raising an unruly eyebrow at her.

Stevie breathed out slowly through her nose and continued to meet his gaze steadily. When Rumlow sighed again she was treated to the smell of his rancid breath. It wasn’t the smell of him that suddenly made her blood run cold or the colour drain entirely from her face, however, oh no. It was his next words.

“It’s about your pal, Cap. Your dear old Bucky.”

Stevie’s entire demeanour changed and drastically so and Rumlow seized the moment of weakness and crowed with absolute delight.

“_Ohhh!_ I’ve struck a nerve there have I? Touched on a sensitive spot?” He feigned ignorance, grinning wickedly as he flipped open the folder and read, “_James Buchanan Barnes-_“

“Don’t you _dare_ speak his name,” She whispered harshly and just like that, all the air vanished out of the room.

Stevie’s tone was dripping with malice, as barely controlled rage rose up within her, so much so that her entire body seemed to _shake_ with her words. Rumlow blinked, momentarily caught off guard himself by the tone and the change in her demeanour. He wasn’t sure he’d ever seen her get so intensely angry at anyone or anything before, come to think of it.

He recovered quickly despite that, however. “Oh, I don’t think you’re in any position to be giving the orders here, Cap. In fact, how about I show you where I stand on the giving orders spectrum of things, hmm?”

He closed to folder and set it back inside the box and Stevie’s gaze lingered on it as Rumlow went to the door. She distantly heard the door opening but it wasn’t until Rumlow huffed, “_Soldier,_ get in here,” That she snapped her gaze back to the doorway.

Rumlow stepped aside, holding the door open and then he was there, inside the room and…Stevie couldn’t breathe.

Bucky was there. It-it had to be Bucky-but, she tried to shake her head weakly and barely succeeded in moving, tears springing to her eyes as she took in the sight of her best friend, her lover, her _Bucky._

“_Bucky,_” She breathed, voice broken and hoarse, unrecognizable even to her own ears.

But there was _zero_ recognition in the Soldier’s gaze and Rumlow’s laughter was cold and slithering. A shudder wracked through her at the sound and she watched in horror as Bucky’s gaze flickered towards Rumlow and then took a step towards him.

“_Oh_, he’s not your Bucky anymore, Cap. No, not a trace of the man he used to be. Not really a man at all, if you catch my drift,” Rumlow said cryptically, giving the Solider a once-over that was anything but kind.

Stevie had no _idea_ what he meant by that because it was too terrible to think the worst with a comment like that.

“_Soldier_-“ Came Rumlow’s harsh bark and her gaze snapped back to where Bucky-_no,_ he wasn’t Bucky right then-the Soldier had straightened, appearing to wait for orders, orders Rumlow was all too happy to give. “How about you make our guest here more comfortable, hmm?”

Stevie’s gaze snapped back up to Bu-the Soldier and she knew she looked devastated, unable to hide it but there was nothing she could do to stop it. She barely registered the fact that he’d even _moved_ until a moment later when the Soldier’s metal hand wrapped tightly around her throat. She wheezed in a breath, startled and panicked. He’d gabbed her like that on the bridge and it had scared the ever loving _shit_ out of her. Now was much the same reaction, despite the fact that she knew who he was.

“Bucky, _please,_” She whimpered, the words barely registering as words at all as he tugged her forward and then there were hands at her ankles, at her wrists but she was too distracted by the fact that the soldier was _there_ just staring at her, waiting.

He didn’t register anything about her, not his name, not the sight of her, not even touching her had brought him back. She whimpered, pathetic, she knew and she distantly heard Rumlow and the others laughing around her.

“Oh, keep saying _please_, sweetheart. Sounds so pretty coming from your mouth,” Rumlow purred and it made her stomach churn, though, that could have been the sudden vertigo as the Soldier tugged her down and she fought weakly against the hands that pulled at her limbs as she was pulled free of the chair.

But the drug was still in her system and she panted, blinding pain clouding her senses as one of the men at her ankle pushed her forcefully down-down to the concrete floor. Her throat was released and she gasped in painful breath after painful breath, wheezing with the effort just to _breathe._

Her gaze fell to where one of the men were tugging her ankles into place and securing them with the mag cuffs to the floor and she grunted in pain when in the next moment, she felt her arms being drawn back harshly behind her and _Christ_ but that hurt. They pinned her arms roughly behind her back, securing them back in their cuffs and looping the metal chain back through the o-ring in the floor.

She was left kneeling on the cold concrete floor, legs spread, ankles pinned and spine arched uncomfortably as she was bent back by the chain securing her wrists and that was _before _a hand caught in her long hair and gave a harsh tug, bringing her chin up and back so that she was forced to stare straight into the unwavering gaze of the Soldier.

She shuddered under that cold stare, the same grey-blue eyes she still dreamt about, still longed to open her eyes to. Tears sprang unwittingly to her eyes then and she fought them down as best she could.

Rumlow chuckled darkly and stepped in between the two. “Now, don’t you look more comfortable, sweetheart.”

Stevie glared at him but felt it lacked her usual ferocity. “M’not your sweetheart,” She muttered, voice strained but firm.

Rumlow and the other men laughed at that, stepping in closer to sneer down at her. “No, you’re right. You’re not our sweetheart, but you’re gonna’ be.”

And it was a threat she felt all too keenly with the way she was positioned, the way she could feel the men’s eyes on her, practically _raking_ over her frame. She forced her chin a little higher and promised herself she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry, seeing her break down. She was going to fight them tooth and nail or so help her-

“_Soldier,_ finish making our guest more comfortable,” Rumlow ordered and Stevie barely had a moment to try and brace herself before the Soldier-discernibly _not _Bucky-stepped in close, startling her.

She barely moved but she did flinch and immediately scolded herself for showing weakness. She could do this. She _could._ And then she felt the Soldier’s cool metal fingers dipping beneath the collar of the stealth suit on the left side where the hidden zipper was. She barely had a moment to wonder how the _hell_ he knew it was there, before he simply tugged and she was unprepared for the way the fabric just _gave_ beneath his harsh pull.

It ripped apart like butter in his grasp and she panted as adrenaline raced through her system and made her dizzy with it. The drug was still inhibiting her, pulling her down and making her brain fuzzy with it and she blinked past the sudden rush of tears building behind her eyes. She could do this, she _had_ to do this.

She grimaced when the Soldier produced a knife and sliced through the material that really shouldn’t be so easy to cut through. Problem was, it wasn’t easy to do so on the outside, but from the inside? Well, it gave far too easy and soon she was left in the tattered remains of her newest stealth suit. For a moment she had the wild thought that Tony would be pissed that it had been ruined so easily.

She almost laughed at the thought, but then she felt the cold metal of the Soldier’s palm settling against the base of her throat and for a hysterical moment, she thought he was going to shove his fist through her chest and pull out her heart like she’d seen in that godawful movie Tony and Peter made her watch with the good looking adventurer.

She needn’t have worried about that, however, oh no, she should have been more worried about the fact that Rumlow had stepped up behind her and had replaced the other man’s hand in her hair with his own, tugging her head back so that she was forced to look up at him. It hurt, the way it stretched her neck and she felt eyes on her throat, the no doubt vulnerable line it made and she shuddered beneath the slow pressure of the Soldier’s hand as it slid up the length of her bared throat just a little more.

“You think she’s pretty, Soldier?” Rumlow hummed, voice thoughtful and Stevie tried to flicker her eyes to where she could just barely glimpse the Soldier in front of her.

Stevie felt the slight pressure of the metal hand as it curled around her throat and she let out an involuntary choking sound when his thumb swept over her racing pulse fluttering beneath the taut skin of her throat. The soldier made a curious sound in the back of his throat and Rumlow barked a laugh, tightening his grip on her hair, the pain racing along her scalp as he gave her a slight shake.

“_Yeah_, bet you think she is. Don’t really blame you, prettiest piece of ass I’m going to lay into, that’s for sure,” Rumlow breathed, voice laced with arousal and _promise_ and Stevie barely managed to stop the bile from rising in her throat. “Bet you want to shove your cock in that throat, don’t you, Soldier? Too bad you can’t get it up without some serious dosing of _Viagra_, ‘cause I’d sure as _shit_ like to see you fuck her face.”

Stevie could feel tears gathering at the corners of her eyes and it didn’t take long for one to escape. She flinched when she felt a hand grasp her shoulder, giving it a bruising squeeze and she realized she probably had a fractured collarbone and then the hand was travelling down over her front and she tensed as that same hand groped her breast over the material of her sports bra. She grimaced and tried to struggle, lean away _anything_ to get away from the awful feeling of the man at her back _touching her _but to no avail.

Rumlow laughed, voice ripe with arousal and she shuddered at the thought of this going any farther, it was already too much. She’d been wrong, she couldn’t do this. Tony would be so ashamed of her. She shut her eyes at the thought. She really couldn’t do this with the Soldier’s eyes on her, boring into hers, that metal hand wrapped around her throat in such a possessive display and then she jerked-weakly, but she did move a bit-when she felt his flesh and blood hand come up to swipe a warm thumb over the apple of her cheek, wiping at her tears.

An involuntary whimper escaped her and Rumlow’s cackle was so disgustingly close it made her want to curl up and hide from the awful sound. She opened her eyes again, her gaze flickered up to the Soldier’s face, hoping beyond hope that there was something there, some flicker of recognition, _something, _**_anything at all_**. All she saw was a slight furrow between his eyes…that hadn’t been there before.

She was shaking, she realized belatedly and she wasn’t entirely sure when she’d started. She blinked past the tears gathering at the edges of her vision and knew that a few more had managed to escape. Her jaw ached with how hard she was clenching it shut and she found herself choking down a sob when the Soldier’s thumb swept down to touch the edge of her mouth and Rumlow’s voice grumbled behind her.

“Yeah, shove a couple’a fingers in there for me, make her choke on ‘em.”

Rumlow had barely uttered the words before Stevie felt the metal hand against her throat go unnaturally still against her tender flesh and then there was a shaky breath from behind the soldier’s mask. She forced her eyes up to look at the man who was not her Bucky any longer and-she blinked, shedding more tears because-there was something there, some flicker, _movement_ in those bleak eyes. There was clarity there.

She blinked, lips parting and she prayed to a God she no longer believed in that Bucky was _somewhere in there._ She did the only thing she could, she called his name.

“_Bucky…_”

She shook with the force of the word as it clawed its way out of her throat, raw with emotion and thankfully nothing else.

There was a moment of complete and utter stillness in the soldier and then there was a sharp intake of breath and she _swore_ she heard her name whispered behind the heavy mask, barely a sound at all, but-

Chaos erupted around her, there was shouting and screaming and the hand in her hair was gone, letting her sag forward in her restraints. The echoes of gunshots, harsh in her ears along with the steady thumping of fists against flesh, metal sinking through, hitting bone and she felt her vision swim as the serum tried to fight the drug still in her system. She could barely tip her head to the side to see what was happening but the room was a flurry of movement, but somehow she was the least of the Strike Team’s worries.

The Soldier was the real threat here.

The sound of the fight around her had dimmed considerably and she tried to get her eyes to focus long enough on the scene before her and immediately regretted it. There was far too much blood and-

She heaved, her stomach roiling from the smell of torn flesh, that awful metallic tang she could _taste_ in the air around her. There was a sound beside her and she willed herself to look, using all of her energy to tip her head in the direction of the noise.

She found the Soldier standing to her left, unmoving but watchful. His mask had been removed, hair a wild mess of dark waves, stringy and matted with blood and sweat against his temple, his cheeks.

“Bucky,” She murmured, voice barely above a whisper and the Soldier shook his head, brow pinching.

“They will come for you, take you to safety,” He whispered, voice hoarse from disuse and Stevie whimpered in relief.

“Bucky, _please_,” She whimpered, a sob trying to claw its way up her throat.

He frowned at her, brows knitting in concern and Stevie felt tears slipping down her cheeks, making the cuts there sting terribly. “They will get you to safety,” He said simply and then her entire vision was filled with him as he pressed in close and ripped the restraints from her.

She sobbed in relief as the unyielding pressure of the mag cuffs gave way beneath his metal fingers and then she was falling. He caught her easily and carefully lowered her to the ground, propping her up as best he could against the chair she’d been previously sitting on.

“Bucky-_Bucky_-“ She choked, attempting to reach for him and failing miserably. “Don’t leave-_please don’t leave_,” She begged and the Soldier shook his head slowly.

“I’m not your Bucky,” He murmured and she only cried harder at that as he started to pull away and she was unable to do anything but call out for him as she _willed _her body to just fucking _move._

“You are!” She shouted, voice failing her, cracking with the force of her sobs and the Soldier shook his head, already moving to the door.

“Don’t come after me, Captain,” He whispered and slipped out the door, shutting it firmly behind him.

Stevie sobbed, shaking her head weakly as he disappeared from sight and she let herself fall apart, unable to do anything else. She slumped to the floor, knowing she was lying in pools of lord only knows what but she didn’t care, couldn’t care about anything other than the fact that Bucky had _left her._

She faded in and out of consciousness for what felt like hours but in reality it was barely fifteen minutes before Tony and Peter found her. SHIELD had fallen, Natasha made sure of that. The helicarriers were destroyed and not by the Avengers, _oh no_. That had been the work of the Winter Soldier, though Stevie hadn’t been told about that just yet.

The scene in which Tony and Peter had come across when they’d finally got a lock on her location was…well, it wasn’t pretty and neither had been the least bit prepared for what they’d found.

They got her out of there, regardless, the Team finally fully assembled and battered, but breathing and right now, that was enough, it had to be. Tony had reached out to Bruce back at the compound and had Jarvis explain Cap’s situation. Jarvis had been able to pinpoint what they’d used to incapacitate her and Bruce was already working on something to help flush it from her system. It would work its way out in time if they left it alone, but Tony couldn’t bear to have to let her wait it out. Not in the condition they’d found her in.

She needed medical attention and Tony was on complete auto-pilot as he talked to Jarvis, Bruce and the rest of the Team to get everything set up. There was medical staff on standby back at the compound and once they were back, he wasted no time rushing Stevie to medical. She was immediately taken into their OR and he and the rest of the Team was left waiting.

They were all battered and bruised, exhausted and hungry but no one felt much like moving as they waited hour after hour to hear back from the doctors. It wasn’t until several hours had passed that the doctors finally returned to explain her situation.

She was going to be fine. She was already recovering and Tony found himself sagging in relief at their prognosis. Four broken ribs, a fractured collarbone, a dislocated wrist, a black eye, bruises and cuts just about on every goddamn _inch_ of her body but she was okay, she was going to be okay.

Tony exhaled shakily at the news and collapsed back into the waiting room chair. Peter reached over to him and squeezed his forearm and Tony nodded, accepting the gesture for the comfort it was. He patted the kids hand and breathed out roughly. Things were going to be alright. They had to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the odd ending to this chapter. I promise to continue when I have the drive to tackle the next part of this story. <3


	14. Chapter 14

Tony was awake, had been awake for going on 26 hours now, which-_not so bad-_but that wasn’t what was really important at the moment, no. _Stevie_ was awake, moving about her apartment according to Jarvis and Tony figured he could give her some much needed space and _that_ was what was important. For the moment.

Stevie was recovering, nearly entirely back to normal now, her injuries were virtually non-existent. Her _physical_ injuries anyway. She’d barely spent three hours in medical before she’d woken and insisted she be moved to her apartment. Despite her broken bones that were very much still broken, Tony insisted as well. Whatever made her comfortable at the end of the day, _that_ was Tony’s priority.

That had been two days ago and Tony hadn’t been to see her since he walked her up to her apartment and made sure she was settled. Sam had offered to check in on her and he had, _again, _according to Jarvis. Peter and even Natasha and Clint had popped in to see her. Bruce even brought her some new teas and Thor had dropped off a new vial of Asgardian liqueur for her, along with wishes to _get well_, as it were. Everyone was properly concerned, but Tony…

He couldn’t bring himself to visit her. He’d made sure she was taken care of, looked after, had positively everything she could possibly want or need, but he couldn’t physically _be there_ with her because it-it was just too much.

He’d seen what she had looked like coming out of that cell. He’d seen the marks on her, the way the tattered remains of her suit lay around her hips, barely covering her even then. He’d seen thedried tear tracks on her cheeks, the dried blood at the corner of her mouth and when she’d opened her eyes when Tony’s worried hands had petted nervously over her arms and neck, checking for injuries, she’d whimpered and said his name and he’d been absolutely _devastated_ at seeing her look so broken down.

And that had been _before_ she’d confessed to seeing Bucky there, before she’d told him and the others that he had broken free and-well, Tony had seen the room. He’d known Stevie hadn’t been the one to do…er, _that._ There was no way she had. There was barely any blood on her and what he did see on her, was more blood spatter than anything else, like she’d just been a bystander and after Tony had managed to procure the video surveillance on the room, they’d _all_ seen what happened.

That being, the Winter Soldier had absolutely _decimated_ the Strike Team in a matter of moments and then just…_left_. The Team-minus Stevie-had watched the video from the beginning, when she’d woken, unbeknownst to her of course. After watching the video, they’d all been a bit shaken over what they’d seen. Bucky had singlehandedly brought out a side of her the others had not been prepared to see.

Tony had an inkling, had had it for a while now. Since that night he’d stumbled across her after a few too many drinks, he’d known just who Bucky was to her. After the video, he was sure just about _everyone_ got that same impression.

When the helicarriers went down with little to no work on their part, they knew they had Barnes to thank. Natasha had leaked SHIELD files in hopes of setting things to rights and it had worked, in a way. Fury was doing what needed to be done and they were doing whatever they could to help. Mainly, Stark Industries were now employing and acting as a base for SHIELD, even if it had somewhat fallen. They’d come back and the Avengers hoped they would be stronger for it.

But as for Barnes, he was in the wind. There had been no trace of his whereabouts, despite Tony having sent Jarvis on his trail almost immediately. He wasn’t all that surprised, but he still had Jarvis looking into it, Natasha as well.

He hadn’t spoken much to Stevie at all since she returned to her apartment, but that was mostly his fault. Read: _all of his fault_. He just…Natasha had given him a file…and it hadn’t been a particularly pleasant one.

She’d warned him that it was going to be a _difficult read_ and she’d also warned him that he wasn’t going to like what he read. She waited with him while he read over the documents, _all_ of them and there had been numerous. Tony figured out pretty quickly why that was.

It…it hadn’t been at all what he’d been expecting. It’d been so, _so much worse. _He didn’t cry. He read and re-read the same paragraphs over and over again until his vision was bleary and Natasha calmly took the file from him when he’d started to shake so badly the papers had started rustling. She’d walked him up to his room and helped him get settled. He’d been on complete auto-pilot while she looked after him and it wasn’t until they were seated across from one another on the sofas in his living room that he finally spoke.

He’d asked her if Stevie knew and Natasha had told him that Sam was currently sitting down with her with a copy of the documents she’d just shown him. Tony wasn’t sure what he wanted to do right then, but it wasn’t anything good. He went to pour himself a drink and after doing so, merely stood at the bar staring down at his glass of scotch as if it held all the answers to the universe.

Natasha had watched him in silence before Jarvis interrupted and said that Captain Rogers was asking about his whereabouts. It wasn’t a _can I come by, is he free_ sort of ask, either. She merely wished to know if he was okay and with someone. Tony had set up little alerts with Jarvis. He would be alerted any time Stevie asked about him. She didn’t know that, of course. Apparently neither did Natasha and Tony watched as the red-head raised a brow at him in question as he told his A.I. to tell her the truth.

There was a lengthy pause and then, _Captain Rogers has asked that if you need anything or if you would like company or to simply yell and scream at her, she would be available._ Tony had laughed and it had been watery and strained but he’d shaken his head and replied, _tell her I just need some time and that she stole my line._

And then he’d poured his scotch down the drain, lamenting over the wasted alcohol only a smidge and walked back over to Natasha who was watching him quietly. “I think it’d be best if you left for a while. I think I need to be alone with my thoughts.”

She’d left without so much as a protest, merely clasped her delicate hand around his shoulder and then slipped out of the room to leave him to his thoughts. He couldn’t help but note that she’d also left the file on Barnes on the coffee table. He didn’t think twice about putting on a pot of coffee and then dragging the file to the kitchen where he sat to pour over it from start to finish… again and again.

_That_ had been 18 hours ago and he’d fallen asleep at some point. At least proud of himself for moving back to the sofa in the living room at some point. He’d barely managed a proper meal, not really feeling like he’d had much of an appetite while reading over the file, but once he’d finally given that up and instead started working on other pressing matters, he’d been able to stomach a couple of pieces of fruit and some water. More coffee too, _duh_.

Stevie had asked after him nearly two-dozen times in as many hours and Jarvis quietly alerted him each time, Tony giving him the same response of, _I’m alive. If at any point she asks to see me or comes up, please just tell her I’m not ready yet._ Jarvis hadn’t pushed and neither did Stevie. Tony was grateful. He _was_ busy, after all.

Which brings him to now, nearly 30 hours after finding out the horrible truth of his parents deaths. It…perhaps hadn’t sunk in quite the way it needed to. But there would be time for that, later. When he wasn’t busy, for example.

He’d been on the phone for nearly forty-minutes before there was a quiet knock at the door. He glanced towards the nearest camera and Jarvis blinked green at him before flashing red three times. He nodded and carried on his conversation with Pepper and a moment later when Natasha sprawled herself out across the love seat, he spared her a nod.

“Listen Pep, I’m gonna’ have to call you back. Do me a favour and email me the details, alright?”

He hummed and murmured his goodbyes before hanging up and turned his attention back to Natasha as he sat back a little more on the couch. The couch with which he felt as if he were becoming one. He really should shower.

“I should shower,” He admitted, grimacing slightly.

Natasha raised a brow at him. “If you think you should, then yeah, probably.”

He hummed softly and rubbed tiredly at his eyes before grabbing and downing what was left of his now cold coffee. “What brings you by?”

Natasha sighed softly and let her gaze flicker over his frame, taking in his slouched shoulders, the bags under his eyes and no doubt the outfit he hadn’t shed in the last couple of days. “Checking up on you is all.”

Tony nodded, blowing out a breath, sure he knew what she must see. “Fair enough,” He agreed, running a hand through his hair and grimacing at how oily it felt.

They were quiet for a moment or three and then Natasha shifted, drawing his attention. “It’s okay if you’re not okay, Tony.”

“Real therapist you are. Did Sam teach you that one?” He huffed.

Natasha shrugged a bit, folding her arms across her chest as she regarded him. “Maybe, but I’m being serious.”

“I know you are,” He admitted, voice soft as he looked down at the stack of papers on his coffee table, some stained with coffee mug rings and the odd crumb or piece of fruit just…sitting there. “Ugh, I’m disgusting. I really should clean up.”

“You’re looking better than I thought to expect.”

Tony glanced up at her briefly and nodded once, ignoring the fact that there was an unopened bottle of whisky planted in the middle of the coffee table. It was just there…in case. In case of _what_ exactly, he wasn’t entirely sure.

“Yeah well, I’ve been busy.”

“I can see that. Want to tell me what your plan is?” Because of course he had a plan.

He shrugged lightly and motioned to the disaster that was his coffee table. “First and foremost?”

She nodded and he exhaled roughly before picking up a StarkPad and offering it to her. She took it and instantly her brows furrowed as she glanced at the screen. She shot him a sharp look and he held her gaze. After a moment, her eyes returned to the screen as she continued to read.

They sat in relative silence for a few minutes and then Natasha calmly set the StarkPad on the table between them. “You need to go and see Stevie.”

Tony scrubbed a hand over his face, unimpressed with the scruff that was taking over and nodded. “I know.”

“Then why haven’t you? If you-if you’re working on…_this,_ why haven’t you told her?”

Tony sighed deeply and stood. “I just needed more time. It’s a lot of work, you know-“

“Bringing someone back from the dead?” Natasha finished drily.

Tony rolled his eyes. “As a matter of fact, yes.”

Natasha huffed softly and shook her head. “Why are you avoiding her, Tony?”

“I’m not avoiding her,” He defended, looking rather disgruntled.

Natasha raised a delicate brow at him and he frowned and grumbled, “Okay, maybe I am. So what?”

“So what?” Natasha frowned. “So she’s pulling her hair out wondering if you’re going to go running after Barnes to kill him. _Tony_, she’s absolutely _terrified_ you’re going to hurt yourself or Barnes. You haven’t seen her since she’s been back in her apartment. She’s still hurting, still…just-“ She shook her head. “Coming to terms with it all.”

Tony’s shoulders sagged. “I know, I do,” He admitted, voice having gone soft. “I’m just-“ He shook his head. “Scared, I guess.”

Natasha blew out a slow breath. “It’s okay to be scared, Tony.”

“_It’s not-_“ He snapped, his chest practically aching with the confession. “I can’t afford to be scared right now, _alright? _She needs everyone to be strong because I’ve-I’ve never seen her like this, have you?”

Natasha blinked and then didn’t say anything and Tony nodded as if to say _yeah, I’m right, aren’t I?_ “She needs our help, our support. We have to get Barnes back here. I’m doing everything I can to help track him down, bring him back to life, as it were and-“

“And you need to _tell her_ that, _show_ her that, Tony. Whatever was going on between you two-“

“_Don’t_-“ Tony interrupted harshly and Natasha stilled, meeting his gaze.

“Don’t what?” She argued, voice steady.

Tony swallowed thickly and shook his head and tried to ignore the awful shaking he could feel starting in his hands. “There’s nothing…_going on_ between her and I. We’re friends, Teammates. She’s-she’s my best friend, Nat and I want to see her happy. Hence getting Barnes back.”

Natasha’s gaze flickered over his face as she apparently mulled that over and Tony knew she wanted to protest, say something against what he’d just said, but she blessedly didn’t, understanding that Tony apparently reallydidn’t want to discuss this right now. Didn’t mean she wasn’t going to bring it up again eventually though, Tony knew.

“Clint would be all over you for using _hence_ in a sentence,” She told him instead and Tony huffed out a strangled laugh, running a still shaking hand through his dishevelled hair and this time made a face at the grossness there.

“I’m sure he would be,” He agreed, letting out a long sigh, hand dropping back to his side.

They were quiet for a beat and then Natasha offered, “She’s in her apartment alone right now. She kicked Sam out about an hour ago.”

Tony blew out a slow breath, gaze flickering over his friend’s features. “Surprised he’s not up here giving me the talk.”

Natasha rolled her eyes. “Oh, not for lack of trying but…”

“But you win. Always and forever,” Tony stated as if by rote and watched as Natasha gave him an all too knowing smile.

Tony scrunched his nose up. “I’ll go and see her,” He agreed. “I just need to shower and change and uh…tidy up a bit.”

“Save the tidying up for later, you and I both know you work better in mess. Go shower and change though and maybe eat something that isn’t coffee first, please, Tony?”

Tony blinked slowly. Natasha _never_ said please. “Okay, I will. I promise,” He agreed and found that it wasn’t even a hardship to say so.

She nodded, apparently pleased and unfolded herself from her spot on his sofa, already heading for the door. “Good boy,” She called over her shoulder. “I hope to see you both at dinner tonight. We’re keeping our scheduled Team movie night.”

“_But-_“

She shot him a _look_ over her shoulder and Tony let out a heavy breath. “Yeah, okay. I’ll be there.”

“Good boy,” She said again and Tony tried not to prickle at how uncomfortable that praise made him feel.

He cleared his throat a little and nodded before quickly turning his gaze away. It wasn’t until the sound of the door shutting reached his ears that he let his posture relax and then shook himself out of the mood he’d been in. He took one last look at the mess of paperwork and open StarkPads on his table and asked Jarvis to save his work and keep him updated before heading for the bathroom.

First things first, he needed a shower and a clean pair of clothes, then he could maybe try and eat something and then…then he would go and see Stevie.

.

“Don’t tell her I’m coming,” Tony mumbled, knowing that Jarvis would hear him.

There was no response from his A.I. but Tony didn’t really need one. He quickly made his way to Stevie’s suite and then just…_stopped_ outside her door. He stared blankly at the door to her suite and took a deep breath, running a nervous hand through his still damp curls. “Come on, Stark,” He muttered, shaking himself from his stupor and ignoring the nervous fluttering in his belly.

He adjusted his grip on the tablet in his other hand and knocked on the door. There was a beat of silence and then the door was being thrown open and Stevie’s bone-weary sigh was enough to make Tony blink in surprise. She didn’t raise her gaze, merely sighed deeply and, “_Sam_, I told you I don’t need a babysit-“

Her words stalled in her throat and she blinked, her gaze having caught on Tony’s chest…where a _Nirvana_ t-shirt was clearly visible. They both stilled, frozen and Tony blew out a slow breath. “Uh, hi…_not_ Sam.”

Stevie’s cheeks flushed and she really looked mortified as she let herself glance over the man in front of her nervously. “I’m so sorry, Tony,” She spluttered, stepping back and opening the door more fully. “Please, come in.”

Tony hesitated and regretted it instantly when she seemed to wither beneath his gaze, her bright blue eyes dimming and lowering to a spot on the hardwood. Tony cleared his throat and breezed past her, making his way to the kitchen area before turning back around to face her.

Stevie had closed the door, but she hadn’t turned back to face him yet, hand still clasped around the doorknob and right then she looked a hell of a lot smaller. She took a moment, which Tony gave her and then she was turning and heading back towards him, gaze still lowered and now she was nervously fiddling with her hands in front of her. Tony would have thought the gesture endearing if it weren’t for the nervous _terror_ written across her pretty face.

She blew out a slow breath as she stopped a little over four feet away from him and Tony’s heart clenched. “_Listen-_“ He breathed, hoping to dispel any worries she had, but he was unprepared for the weight of her gaze to suddenly pin him in place as she finally looked him properly in the eyes.

“_I’m so _**_sorry_**_, Tony_,” She whispered and Tony found himself blinking in surprise when he caught sight of her lower lip wobbling, the glossiness of her eyes.

Tony shook his head slowly. “What on _Earth_ do you have to be sorry for?”

Stevie shook her head, drawing her arms around her middle and Tony noted the way she swept her fingers over the bruises that she no doubt still wore beneath her t-shirt. “I didn’t-I-“ She shook her head, lower lip trembling now. “I didn’t know he-“

“_Hey-_“ Tony cut in, not sharply, but it was a near thing. “You had absolutely no idea about the crimes he committed and-_Christ, Stevie_-it wasn’t even really _him,_ you know?”

Stevie blinked, exhaling shakily as she processed that. Tony sighed softly, taking a step closer to her, hating the space between them. “I don’t blame him for my parents deaths,” Tony admitted, voice quiet but sure and Stevie’s whole frame seemed to start to _shake_ at the words.

Tony couldn’t help himself, he set the StarkPad he’d brought aside on the kitchen table and strode towards her, sweeping her into his arms. He barely resisted the urge not to envelop her in a crushing hug, knowing that she was probably still tender and bruised. She stiffened in his embrace for a half second before she was quickly _sagging_ against him, her entire frame trembling as her arms slipped around his waist to clutch at his back in a fierce hug.

Tony let himself hug her just a smidge tighter at that.

“_Tony-_“ She whispered, voice broken and hoarse as she buried her face in the crook of his neck.

Tony sighed, running a gentle hand over the back of her head, caressing over her curls. “It’s going to be okay, Stevie. We’re going to get through this and I-I know this isn’t going to be easy. I can’t just-“ He shook his head, breathing into her hair and ruffling the strands. “I can’t just _forget_ that he hurt my parents, but-I do know it _wasn’t him_. This was all on Hydra, it’s always fuckin’ Hydra.”

Stevie sniffled against him and Tony drew back, creating a little space between them so that he could look at her properly. “I know who he was to you, Stevie. All the stories I’ve heard of him- _Barnes_, those don’t line up with this…t_hing_ they’ve made him become.”

“It isn’t him,” She told him. “He’s not-it’s not _him_, Tony,” She stressed and Tony nodded, brows pinching as he tried to soothe her, pushing her curls back over her shoulder.

“I know, Stevie. I do,” He consoled, shaking his head a little. “I can’t even fathom how you’re taking all this. Nat said you’d read the files and-“ He sighed. “So did I, obviously and I don’t-I don’t know how else to explain this to you, so…” He let go of her and went to retrieve the tablet he’d brought along with him.

Stevie watched him, curious and sad and all kinds of other emotions and he frowned, unlocking the screen and pulling up a few documents to show her. When he stepped back into her bubble and handed over the StarkPad, she took it tentatively.

“Go ahead,” He prompted, when she didn’t look down at the screen at first.

Stevie breathed out slowly, gaze flickering over his face for a moment before she registered the tablet in her grasp, turning her attention towards it. Tony watched as her eyes flickered over the screen as she read and it barely took a moment before she was letting out a _wounded_ noise, brows pinching up and then she was stumbling backwards. Tony reached out in an attempt to catch her, afraid she was going to faint, but she just sank back against the back of the sofa and Tony breathed out roughly at the startle.

She was white knuckling the StarkPad and the back of the sofa as her eyes continued to scan over the documents on the screen and Tony frowned, watching her curiously and hoping she wasn’t about to crack the screen and hurt herself or something. “Those are all legal documents,” He told her gently. “Pep’s working on it, my lawyers too and they’ve all signed NDA’s and nothing is live yet, okay? He is a Prisoner of War, Stevie and he will be treated with all the dignity of such and now all we need to do is find him and bring him home.”

Stevie’s gaze slowly dragged away from the StarkPad and fixed on Tony with so much awe, so much wonder and gratefulness that Tony didn’t immediately react to her calling his name. It had been so soft, so full of emotion, _raw_ and Tony just blinked at her.

“_Tony-_“ She said again and Tony cleared his throat feeling rather uncomfortable all of a sudden.

“Before you go and get all sappy on me-“ Tony tried to defer and Stevie’s face brightened considerably, a timid smile breaking across her previously darkened features.

“Tony,” She interrupted again, softer with a hint of amusement in her tone as she straightened up and took a step towards him. “This is-“

“_Nothing_, it’s nothing,_ alright?_ You would have done the same if I had a lover from a previous life that had done some serious shit while not in their right mind.”

Stevie choked out a suspiciously watery laugh and Tony shifted uncomfortably as she got closer, setting down the StarkPad on the kitchen table behind him. “Tony…you are without a doubt, the kindest, most thoughtful, most generous-“

Tony made an uncomfortable non-committal noise in the back of his throat and took a step back and managed to bump into one of the chairs settled around the kitchen table. “_Stop it-_“ He warned, pointing a finger at her mock-threateningly and Stevie’s small smile only grew.

“I’m being very serious right now, Tony,” She explained, gently settling her hands atop Tony’s shoulders and squeezing them gently.

Tony cleared his throat and glanced away from her, unable to keep looking into her earnest gaze. “Yeah well, you know I don’t do serious all that well.”

Stevie huffed a soft laugh and let her hands gently trail down his arms, giving them a gentle squeeze. “Can you look at me for a second?”

Tony huffed, but didn’t bring his gaze up right away. It wasn’t until she gave him another gentle squeeze that Tony forced his eyes back to hers. She smiled at him kindly, tears on her cheeks and a wobble to her bottom lip that made him want to kiss it away.

“Thank you, Tony. I wanted to say thank you,” She breathed, blinking past the sudden rush of more tears as they threatened to escape, a few even succeeding.

Tony breathed out roughly and glanced away with a sharp nod. “Not a big deal.”

“It is,” She disagreed, tone firm.

Tony cleared his throat slightly and it was only when she dropped her hands from his arms and hugged her middle, her fingers still swiping over that same spot over her ribs, that Tony let himself look back to her. He glanced down to where she was caressing her side through her shirt and shifted uncomfortably.

“Uh, h-how are your-“ He gestured towards her, an aborted sort of gesture and her gaze softened.

“They’re healing,” She admitted. “My ankle is still a little weak, collarbone too. I guess I’m actually still quite tender and the bruising isn’t very pretty…”

“You’re very pretty,” He mumbled and blinked in surprise at his own idiocy.

Stevie’s cheeks pinked up adorably at that and Tony couldn’t suppress his own embarrassed smile as he caught sight of it. “I’m glad they’re healing,” He covered and she smiled a little bashfully as she nodded, glancing away. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there sooner.”

Stevie’s brows pinched as she glanced up at him through her lashes. “Wasn’t your fault, Tony. I should have seen it coming, should’ve known-“

“There is absolutely no way you could have known that they were Hydra, Stevie. You know that, we all do. They’ve been hiding within SHIELD for _years-Christ-_it took way too long for _any_ of us to realize it, but it wasn’t your fault. I’m more disappointed in Fury than anything, because apparently he’d had an _inkling_, as it were and never bothered to _tell us that._”

“_But-_“ Tony went on. “It’s over with, Fury and the Team will weed out everyone and thanks to that file leak, it’s going to be a fairly simple cleanup.”

Stevie nodded, biting her lower lip gently as she looked away. “I just wish they hadn’t gotten the drop on me. I should have been stronger, should’ve done more.”

“I saw the footage,” He blurted, wincing. “I uh…saw what happened in the elevator…and the containment room.”

Stevie blinked slowly back up at him and _crap_, apparently no one had said anything about that to her yet. “Y-you-“ She swallowed hard. “You saw the footage of…all that?”

Tony cleared his throat and forced himself to nod. “Yeah and…I know you figured it out pretty quickly in the elevator, but you literally had no where to go.”

“I could have broken the glass-“ She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I could have jumped out-“

“And broken every goddamn bone in your body?”

She scoffed, striding away from him and started to pace, apparently unhappy with Tony’s sharp tone. “I would have been no worse off and I-“

“Barnes wouldn’t have done what he did if you had,” Tony interrupted, softening his tone and Stevie stilled, her shoulders slumping.

“He saw me and he-he knew me. There was recognition there, maybe not a lot, but he-he _knew me_, Tony,” She admitted, voice soft and tearful, _hopeful_.

“I know, I saw it too.”

Stevie’s gaze drew back to him and she exhaled shakily, her lips parting as if to speak, to voice the thing that Tony knew was coming, but he had to beat her to it.

“You have to go after him.”

The words pained him, they truly did. But they were such a deep truth that Tony knew he needed to say them himself, because hearing them from her was going to be too difficult right now.

Stevie’s heart felt like it faltered in her chest and she found herself just staring at her friend, her best friend in this century and-

“I do,” She agreed, her heart _aching_ with the force of the words. “I owe it to him, Tony. I have to do this-I-“

“I _know_,” Tony consoled, voice soft but earnest as he stepped into her space and gripped her upper arms, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “You don’t owe anything to anyone, but _I know_, Stevie and I’m going to help you find him, help you bring him home.”

Stevie’s bright blue orbs glistened with fresh tears and Tony gave her a reassuring smile. “Just promise me you’ll come back, in one piece,” He added.

“I promise,” She swore and Tony nodded, pushing out a breath as he forced himself to let go of her.

He didn’t get far, however. As soon as his hands fell to his sides, Stevie was reaching out to cup his face and he startled, Tony pulling back-only a little. They both stilled at that and Tony blinked as she just _looked_ at him, her eyes searching and Tony thought she looked…well, _vulnerable._

He reached up and gently wrapped his calloused hands around her wrists, feeling the warmth of her skin as it soaked into his palms. He breathed in slowly and he knew, just _knew_ she wanted to kiss him and he-he couldn’t let her do that right now.

He shifted his grasp to gently remove her hands from his face and cupped hers instead, watching as her brows pinched up slightly and Tony made a split seconds decision. He pulled her to him-gently, _oh so gently-_and pressed a closed mouth kiss to the furrow between her brows.

Her lashes fluttered, eyes closing and he let himself close his own as well, just soaking in the heat of her body so close to his. “You haven’t been cleared yet,” He whispered, afraid to break the quiet as he pulled back gently, slowly withdrawing his hands from her face. “But I’ll make sure you’ve got a jet and uh, Sam…he won’t let you go alone and I-I can’t. I have to stay here and help with the cleanup.”

Stevie nodded, already blinking open her eyes to watch as Tony took a few steps away from her and nodded sagely, glancing to where she’d set the tablet down on the table. “Jarvis will track you. He’s already working on tracking Barnes. He’s not exactly having much luck, but it’s only a matter of time.”

Stevie nodded, almost numbly. “I’ll leave in the morning…I’ll…call Sam.”

“He hasn’t gone far, I’m sure.”

Stevie huffed softly and nodded, looking away for a moment as she tried to figure out what to say, though _how_ to say it was another thing entirely. “Do-“ She cleared her throat slightly, shaking her head at herself. “Is there anything I can-“ She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose and startled a little when she felt Tony’s warm hand curl lightly over her shoulder.

“Come down and have a bite to eat with me. We’ll sit with the Team, chat and then have dinner later. It’s movie night and Nat says we’re still doing it, so if I have to go, so do you.”

Stevie nodded, smiling faintly and glanced up into Tony’s face, noting the lines around his eyes, the way they crinkled just that bit more in tightness. She exhaled softly and nodded again. “Alright, fair enough.”

Tony huffed and nodded, letting his hand slip from her shoulder, the tips of his fingers grazing along her arm and making her shiver lightly at the touch. “Good talk,” Tony chuckled and Stevie huffed in amusement and went to the door, Tony following dutifully behind.

Things were going to be just fine. Maybe if Tony kept thinking it over and over again, they would be.


	15. Chapter 15

Three Months Later

.

“_Shit-_“ Tony swore, yanking his hand away from what he’d been tinkering with and stuck his now bleeding thumb in his mouth.

He grimaced a bit and pulled it out, looking at it quickly. It wasn’t that bad, thank goodness, so he spun around to grab his phone that was vibrating across the worktable. He didn’t bother looking at the screen and simply swiped to answer the call and stuck the phone to his ear, already turning his attention back to what he’d been working on as he tipped his head to his shoulder to steady the phone.

“_Go-_“ He sighed, brows furrowing as he attempted to bend the little piece of metal back to where it _should_ be.

There was a soft exhale over the line and Tony blinked, instantly sitting up straighter. “_Hi, Tony_,” Came the soft voice, bone-weary and yet somehow relieved.

“_Stevie,_” He said in surprise, hands stilling as he sat back on his stool.

“_Yeah…’s me_,” She murmured, voice still soft; _Christ_, but she sounded exhausted.

“Uh-“ He cleared his throat. “H-how uh, how’s the search going?”

Tony didn’t need to ask. Not really. Jarvis followed their progress and gave him updates every few hours, because Tony was just like that. He shifted on his stool as he let his gaze stray away from his task, focusing on the sound of her voice over the line instead.

“_Not…not great_,” She admitted, voice a little more than resigned at this point.

Tony nodded and realized she couldn’t see him. “Yeah, I uh…Jarvis, you know. But uh, you know if there’s anything you need-“

“_I’m coming home_,” Stevie interrupted and her voice was barely above a whisper and Tony blinked, words suddenly trapped in his throat.

There was a heavy pause and then Tony exhaled shakily. “Are you sure?”

Stevie sighed deeply. “_Yeah…all-all our leads have dried up. There’s nothing, absolutely nothing._”

Her voice shook and Tony frowned, shaking his head. “Stevie, don’t give up now-“

“_I’m not giving up,_” She said, tone just shy of fierce and Tony let out a breath. “_I just think I need to come home, regroup. Take some time or-I don’t know-something._”

Tony nodded a little and cleared his throat. “You know you’re always welcome here, Stevie. Come home, take some time. Everything’s blown over with SHIELD and m-maybe I can come with you next time.”

Stevie huffed softly. “_Pretty sure Sam’s sick of me at this point, not sure I want you to wind up in the same boat._”

Tony chuckled softly and couldn’t help the soft smile. There was a quiet pause on the line and Tony closed his eyes, just listening to the sound of her quiet breaths on the other end of the line.

“When will you be home?” He forced himself to ask and Stevie let out a heavy breath.

“_Eight hours, give or take. Christ, I don’t even know what time it is in New York-_“

“Uh-3:30…in the morning,” Tony filled in, once he’d squinted enough to be able to read the time on his phone.

Stevie laughed and it was a little wobbly. Tony didn’t want to think about why. “_Go to bed, Tony and I’ll be home by the time you wake up_.”

“Yeah, okay. That sounds good,” He agreed and Stevie huffed in amusement.

“_Night, Tony._”

“Night, Stevie.”

.

Stevie comes home and…_stays _home, for a while. She takes a bit of downtime to herself, Sam does too. Though, he does check in on her often. They all do. She’s down and it’s apparent to the rest of the Team and they do their best to keep her spirits up. She spends most of her free time pouring over maps, following leads, making phone calls and just…overall not taking great care of herself.

Don’t get them wrong, she showers, still works out, goes to the gym and even runs first thing in the morning like she always does. But now, now she spends nearly every other waking moment searching for Bucky from the comfort of her own home and Tony’s not stupid enough to think that that’s going to last very long.

She’s been home for three weeks now and the Team is half convinced that she’s going to run herself ragged with how little sleep she’s getting. Though, according to Sam, she hadn’t been doing all that much sleeping while they were out searching for Barnes either. Natasha tried to take her out shopping to cheer her up and the trip lasted all of an hour before Natasha had to treat it as a lost cause.

They came back to the compound and Stevie had gone right back to pouring over grainy surveillance footage. Natasha helped.

That had been a few days ago and now, well, Stevie wasn’t exactly pouring over files or following any leads, no, she was a little too busy for that at the moment. Because unnamed-villain-of-the-week had decided to make an appearance and _granted_, it’d been a while since they’d had a particular need to assemble quite like this, usually they’d be just quick away missions or recon and the like, but not today.

No, _today_ they were battling it out with a dude that was hell-bent on wreaking havoc on the poor citizens of New York-_again_-and the Avengers-minus, Bruce, Thor and Loki, however-were doing their level best to incapacitate the stupid little robots the weirdo had created. Tony had been interested for like, _maybe_ the first three and a half minutes of the fight before he’d declared the entire thing-

“_A waste of my fucking time_,” He muttered over the comms and not for the first time.

Stevie was so tired she didn’t even bother to admonish him for his language.

He rather wished that she would.

“Easy there, tin-can,” Clint chuckled and Tony rolled his eyes.

They’d located the dude responsible at the very least, but they were having a rather trying time getting to him, what with the hundreds of little robots gathered around him and Tony had _tried_ using an EMP. _Tried_ being the key word here.

Stevie was the closest to succeeding of course, but it’s not like that was much of a surprise, really. Peter and Nat were on the ground with her, though not _with her _with her, while Clint held his perch and Tony and Sam took to the skies. It was business as usual, to be honest. But today was far from usual, because today Stevie was _tired_ and she was pushing herself, they all knew it and yet it wasn’t seemingly going to be enough.

“_Cap-_“ Sam cut in. “You need a hand there or-“

“_I’ve got it_-“ She said tersely, tone snappish and Sam grimaced.

“That’s good and all-“ Tony sighed, voice strained as he shot through yet another handful of the fucking _robots_.

“_I’m fine-_“ She snapped and Tony huffed.

“You know, we’d be more inclined to believe you if you hadn’t used the _f _word,” Clint chuckled and Stevie rolled her eyes; they _all_ rolled their eyes.

“I’ve got it handled,” She insisted and the others didn’t exactly back off, but they tried to give her space; mentally, because Sam and even Tony were attempting to close in on her location.

_Hell,_ even Nat and Peter were trying to get closer to her.

Apparently, it just wasn’t a possibility right then.

Not before Stevie twisted to catch the shield as it sent yet another bot to the ground and bounced back to her, when it slipped right through her grasp. Her sound of dismay as it bypassed her entirely had just about all of them inhaling sharply as they truly focused their efforts in getting to her _right the fuck now_.

She barely avoided the bot that she had intended to aim for next and as she twisted to get out of its way, she was suddenly being bore down on by _two others_. She barely had time to react, a harsh curse escaping her as she managed to escape their blows by the skin of her teeth, one of the bots flailing arms catching her in her side and _damn it_. The Team was going to be giving her shit when they saw just how many cuts and bruises she’d managed to garner during the fight.

She’d just managed to right herself, shield safely back in her grasp as she turned to resume her attack on the bots when she found a bot in full tilt almost on top on her. Her breath hitched and she was prepared to react, _she was_ but she didn’t have to.

A bullet whizzed past her, dangerously close to her shoulder and lodged itself in the robot’s sternum, a dead-shot to the circuitry and the stupid thing’s weakness. A fact they’d quickly picked up on and had been taking advantage of to the best of their ability for the last twenty-minutes.

Stevie let out a relieved breath as she turned to thank Nat, most likely, but her Teammate was nowhere in sight, at least…no where _close_ enough for proper sight. She blinked, about to voice her confusion and thanks, when Clint made a startled noise over the comms.

“Uh, _Cap?_” Came Clint’s voice and the confusion lacing his tone had Stevie’s worry on the rise but before she had a chance to address him. “There’s a dude with a metal arm up here I think you might know something about…”

Stevie’s eyes widened in barely contained shock, heart stuttering behind her ribs as she inhaled sharply, unable to breathe, to think, to _hope._ She was running before she’d even made the conscious decision to _move_. There was a commotion over the comms, Tony barking orders, taking the lead, Sam letting her know that he was too far out to give her a lift and then she heard Peter’s breathless voice in her ear.

“_Incoming, Cap._”

Stevie’s voice had entirely failed her and she was nodding and looking around for Peter, sure he was nearby and doing his level best to dispatch the stupid robots-_speaking of which-_

Stevie jumped, twisted and flung the shield in the direction of two more of the remaining bots and distantly, she could hear more gunshots, the sound of the fight around her continuing on, despite her sudden need to _get to the fucking rooftop_.

Her shield easily dispatched of the two bots, slicing cleanly through their sternums and then the shield was back in her hands and she was flat out sprinting to where she could see Peter swinging towards her. She must have spoken to him, must have made a noise of agreement because he sure as _shit_ hadn’t seen her nod, but she didn’t dwell on it, instead looking for a way to get up to him.

It really didn’t take much. The kid was Spider Man after all. Stevie leapt onto the roof of an abandoned taxi and stopped, her entire body practically _vibrating_ with the need to _do something god damn it._

“Need a lift?” Came Peter’s reassuring voice, calm, albeit a little breathless.

“_Please-_“ She gasped, voice hoarse and _Christ_, she felt like she was choking on the damn word.

She didn’t have to wait long, even if it did feel like a bloody eternity as she stood atop the taxi. But then Peter was there and she prepared herself for the inevitable whiplash she was about to experience, as much as one was able, mind you.

Peter apologized softly in her ear once he’d grabbed her and she found her breath escaping her lungs in a _whoosh_ as he snatched her up from the roof of the car and immediately started slinging webs to get them to Hawkeye’s location.

She’d slipped the shield into its harness before he’d picked her up and now she focused her efforts on keeping her grip on Peter’s middle so that he could focus his efforts on getting them where they needed to go. Peter was _strong_ and wasn’t that the understatement of the century? He’d bested her in just about every sparring session they’d had. Well, _just about_. Peter was easy to tease and Cap wasn’t about using what she had to distract him.

It took them no time at all before Peter was giving her a warning as they made one last swing up towards the edge of the roof and Stevie wasn’t goddamn _listening_ and the second they appeared over the lip of the roof, Stevie was letting go and tucking in tight as she rolled and it wasn’t precise and practiced like her rolls usually were.

Oh no, she was far too keyed up for that.

She was usually impressively light on her feet, but right this moment? She was anything but.

She had little regard to her body as she landed hard on the rooftop and contrary to popular belief, super-hero landings were actually stupid and painful and _Christ_, had she really just _done that?_ Her body registered the shock of her knee hitting the rooftop and she knew there’d be a dent there, surely.

Her head whipped up and when she’d made the conscious decision to raise the shield above her, poised and ready to fight, she didn’t goddamn know.

But in that moment, _nothing fucking _**_mattered_**. Not Peter’s concerned admonishment when she’d let go, not Tony’s harsh curse as they finished dealing with the last few bots, not Clint’s _aw, Cap, your poor knees_, not Nat’s annoyed huff or Sam’s reprimand. None of it fucking _mattered._

Because there was _Bucky…_standing not ten feet from her, rifle in his grasp, the metal arm on full display, decked in combat gear and looking for all the world like a soldier heading into battle.

Or…the Winter Soldier gearing up for a fight.

Her breath rushed from her lungs in a painful _whoosh_ and she blinked past the sudden tears that sprang to her eyes at finally _seeing_ him so close and she could see _all _of him. From his messy dark hair that was currently being buffeted by the wind, his grey-blue eyes watching her with barely concealed nerves, the thinness of his lips, nearly pursed in an unpleasant line and that all too familiar furrow between his brows that _always_ made her want to press her lips to it to smooth it out.

He was unmoving, standing and just…_staring_ _at her _and to be fair. She wasn’t that much better off. Her breathing had returned and she was panting harshly, despite not having exactly expended that much energy in her hurried attempt to _get to him_ _at all costs_, but it didn’t _matter_ because he was _right there._

Her own brows had pinched in pain and disbelief and her heart positively _ached_ for him. She found herself slipping her shield onto her back, still feeling for all the world as if she were on autopilot, not fully conscious of her body’s movements or anything other than the man in front of her. She tried to find her voice as she stared at him with wide disbelieving eyes and blinked, her hand suddenly reaching up to grab the back of her cowl.

She removed it, her hair a right mess of dishevelled curls as she cast her cowl aside and she could feel the sweat beading at her temple, matting her hair to her head and she knew she must look a right mess, covered in sweat and dirt and grime and even machine oil thanks to those bloody robots. She didn’t think much of it, however, too busy letting her eyes rake over the man before her.

Bucky was_ here_, Bucky was whole and breathing and _safe._

He had lowered the rifle in his grasp, no longer effectively pointing it up at the sky, but down at the ground beside him. He looked tense, his body poised and perhaps ready to fight or flee, she wasn’t entirely sure. Regardless, he still looked so goddamn beautiful, handsome and deadly in equal measure and Stevie found her eyes welling up, tears threatening to escape as her lips parted and she wasn’t sure if she could make her throat work. Wasn’t sure if she could bring herself to speak, let alone cry or scream or-

“_Bucky-_“ Came her choked off whimper and she didn’t even recognize the sound of her own voice, hoarse and filled with longing and desperation and _Christ, _but Bucky was looking _right at her_, his own brows pinching even more so as he let his steely gaze roam over her features.

He cleared his throat slightly and nodded, movements jerky and stilted and Stevie was unaware of the _gutted_ sound she made a moment later when-“Yeah…’s me, pal.”

Stevie didn’t know what happened, but in the next moment she was doubling over, unable to keep herself upright and then Bucky was _there_, right there in front of her, hands outstretched and reaching for her in an attempt to steady her and Stevie…Stevie let herself fall_._


	16. Chapter 16

There had been chaos after that, sort of.

There had been more _questions_ than chaos, truth be told. Not that Stevie was all that particularly coherent for any of it. Unable to focus on more than _BuckyBuckyBucky_. But she _was_ dimly aware of him answering them, voice quiet, timid but serious, _earnest_ and Stevie’s heart was absolutely _breaking._

Because he said _he remembered._

What that meant in its entirety, Stevie had no idea yet but Bucky was still holding her, _cradling her, _seemingly unable to let go and Stevie felt much the same way. She didn’t want to think about what a picture she must make right then. Clad in her dirty sweat stained uniform, hair a wild mess, face covered in grime and sweat, blood and probably tears if she was being honest with herself. She looked the part of a right mess and coupled with the fact that she’d dropped to her goddamned _knees_ in front of Bucky and the rest of the Team, she was feeling all kinds of vulnerable and shaky.

It didn’t take long, however, before Tony was insisting they head back to the compound before any camera crews caught sight of them, explaining that SHIELD was incoming and Bucky was of course being told to tag along so that they could talk and get him settled in. And although Bucky wasn’t exactly reluctant to follow, he was obviously nervous. Skittish in a way that Stevie had never seen him. But this Bucky and _that_ Bucky were two different people…even if they were one and the same and Stevie wasn’t stupid enough to believe things were just going to go back to normal between them.

There was no normal in her life anymore.

Bucky had a go bag, Stevie belatedly realized as they traipsed up the ramp of the jet. A small backpack along with his rifle and Stevie wondered briefly if that was all he’d managed for himself in terms of worldly belongings since he’d ran. It made her heart ache to know that he’d been getting by on so little when she’d been living under Stark’s umbrella for so many years now.

She pushed the thought aside and did her best to pay attention to the conversation and now that Bucky had pulled himself from their close embrace and distanced himself by about a foot, she was able to pay _much_ closer attention to the conversation. She found herself trying to get closer, leaning in towards him every time he opened his mouth to speak and she knew she must look the part of a fool, especially when as they were taking up their seats on the jet, she hesitantly reached out to place a glove covered hand tentatively on flesh and blood his forearm.

He didn’t so much as flinch, but to be fair he did see it coming. Sharp eyes barely straying from her for more than a second at a time. He let her curl those strong fingers around his forearm and though her touch was light, he swore he could feel the warmth even through the layers of his clothing. Now if he could school his features and suppress the urge to shudder at her hand on him, that would be great.

He mentally shook himself as her grasp shifted and then pulled away entirely as she settled into her seat. The group was mostly quiet as they took their seats, the odd question directed at him had him answering as honestly as he dared while the others looked on and Stevie…she was watching him with such careful, _soulful_ eyes and Bucky was always helpless around her, even in this century it seemed.

“We’ll talk more once we get you settled in. There’s no rush to grill you right now…unless you’re having murdery thoughts…” And that hadn’t been Stevie’s voice like Bucky had expected.

Tony was standing in front of him, not Iron Man, the armour having slipped away and Bucky blinked, a little caught off guard by the man, let alone the words he’d just spoken. Stevie made a soft noise and Bucky’s gaze flickered towards her for a half-second before focusing back on Tony.

“None whatsoever,” Bucky assured him and most likely the others.

Tony gave him a curt nod and that was that and Bucky watched as the man whom he’d done _a lot _of research on simply clamped at hand on Stevie’s shoulder to give her a squeeze-the blonde leaning in ever so slightly at his touch-before making his way to the cockpit where Natasha and Clint were getting them airborne.

His own gaze flickered back to Stevie within seconds of him leaving and he found the blonde’s mesmerizing gaze pinned on him once more, not bothering to hide it either. Bucky found he couldn’t look away, despite feeling several other sets of eyes on him.

.

They make it back to the compound without incident, Tony assuring Stevie that Fury wasn’t going to get involved with Barnes until the man himself said so and Stevie…Tony was pretty certain she was about to burst into tears at the very _idea._ So, he’d made sure to tell her to get Bucky settled and they’d talk about it later.

Getting Bucky settled consisted of Stevie walking him around the common area in a daze, barely speaking, just…_waving_ _her hands _around the space as if to say, _here, you can use this _and Bucky would be entertained any other day, he was certain, but not today.

He felt off-kilter in a way he’d gotten used to as of late, but this _was_ a little different. Regardless, he let her show him around, both of them quiet and the rest of the Team just…watching from a safe distance. They were undoubtedly worried about him, uncertain if he was in the right mind, surely. He suspected they were also worried about Stevie’s safety with him, not that he thought she had anything to worry about. He came back because he thought he was ready. Because he thought he was no longer a danger. He wouldn’t have come back otherwise. Bucky didn’t blame them for their worry, couldn’t. But he did hope he would be a little better received…maybe in a year or two that would be the case.

He wasn’t about to hold his breath.

.

On Bucky’s tour of the compound, Stevie had informed him that he’d be staying in _her _apartment and that was…that was something at least. Bucky had questioned it openly of course, insisting that if the others weren’t comfortable with him there, which he knew they weren’t, not yet at least, he’d be willing to put himself in isolation so that they could keep an eye on him while they questioned him to their hearts content.

Stevie had shot down the suggestion as if it had personally offended her. Bucky wasn’t entirely sure that it hadn’t. Not wanting to offend her any further, he let her settle him into one of the spare rooms in her apartment…a spacious looking place with two bedrooms, three bathrooms, an office and an open-concept kitchen that bled into a rather large living room.

It all looked comfortable-_homey-_the couches and chairs draped with blankets and littered with soft looking pillows. The kitchen was warm and inviting, even with the stainless steel appliances. The place was lived in, certainly and Bucky felt for all the world as if he were an intruder in such a special place. Not that Stevie let him feel that way for long.

She’d told him to make himself at home as it were and though Bucky wasn’t really sure _how_ to go about that particular request just yet, still acclimating to the fact that he could actually you know…_do that_ now, he figured he’d figure it out eventually. Stevie did her best to help. Though Bucky was pretty sure she was by far not the only one involved in what was quickly becoming a rather intensive induction.

There had been…deliveries_._ _Plural._ Bucky had struggled to accept them all and…he still hadn’t exactly unboxed and unwrapped everything he’d been given just yet. There were just…a lot of bags and boxes with logos he didn’t recognize, some he did and…he just wasn’t ready to think about it yet. He was fine wearing the few sparse belongings he’d accrued over the last few months on the run. Not that he’d dream of telling Stevie that, of course.

After that first afternoon when she’d left him in the safety of his _own room_ in _her apartment,_ Bucky had taken a shower, changed into a simple pair of clothes he had, then he’d eaten a meal, a _proper_ meal. Stevie had insisted on making it herself and Bucky had…just blinked and eaten it and he was aware that he probably should have teased her about it. Asked her when she’d learned to cook without burning the house down like he was sure he used to do _once upon a time_ but he couldn’t exactly bring himself to do so.

The meal had been lovely, just simple pasta with chicken and an Alfredo sauce but…Steviehad made it _for him. _He tried to ignore the pang in his chest at the gesture.

There had been absolutely _zero _conversation while they’d eaten, both simply choosing to eat their food and stare at each other some more, both apparently even too mentally exhausted to try. It was awkward but honestly? Bucky wouldn’t have changed it. Because the fact that they were _there_…_together_…was sort of everything for him. Even he could recognize that with his less than reliable memory.

He’d gone to his room not long after their dinner together and said their good nights and while he hadn’t exactly slept much that first night, he _did_ feel more rested and at ease than he had in a very long time. Though when he’d emerged from his room early the next morning to find Stevie sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of what appeared to be cold coffee in front of her, he wondered if he shouldn’t have just slept on the couch in case Stevie wanted to come and just…stare at him.

He would be lying if he said he didn’t want to be just as reassured by her presence as she apparently was by his. He didn’t dwell on it, however, vowing to maybe fake falling asleep that night on the sofa so that he could ease both of their worries, even if it was just a little bit.

The rest of the next day…had gone better than Bucky had originally thought it would. He expected more yelling for one…he…actually hadn’t been yelled at by any one yet. Though Natasha _had_ glared at him something fierce for the first five-minutes of the…he wanted to call it an interrogation, but it was nothing of the sort he was used to. Anyway, she had glared at him until Stevie had rolled her eyes and gave the red-head this _look _and then she was rolling her eyes and speaking to him in Russian saying, _you shot me_ and Bucky had apologized instantly, to which she had scowled and forgiven him in the blink of an eye provided he didn’t do it again.

And that had been that.

Well, almost. They had asked him questions, they _all _had. It had mostly been business, _did you do this, did you do that_ and so forth. He’d also apologized to Sam for messing up his wings and Sam had accepted the apology easily. There were questions of why he’d brought down the helicarriers and why he’d left Stevie and not simply given himself up when he became more aware of himself. He answered as honestly as he possibly could, admitting his mistakes and not hiding from them either. It wasn’t going to work if he couldn’t be honest with them, even he knew that.

He’d gone on to explain that he just hadn’t been ready, that he still didn’t know who he was then and that he _just needed more time._ But after the fourth time he’d apologized, Stevie and shockingly, _Tony_ had apparently had enough.

It went a little something like this.

_“Listen-“ Tony interrupted, sitting up straighter in his chair._

_ They’d brought him to some sort of conference room and while Bucky ended up at the head of the table, he sure as hell didn’t feel exactly like he was the guest of honour with the seven superheroes…and one kid, staring him down expectantly. Well, Stevie wasn’t. She was just watching him with wide searching eyes the entire time. Not that Bucky entirely minded when all he wanted to do was look at her that way, forever and always._

_ Apparently he was still a sap. Good to know._

_ “We’ve all read your file, Barnes and we fully understand just what exactly you are capable of. We also fully understand that what you went through was certainly not by your choice. You were forced to commit those crimes, forced into captivity and made to do the things that you did or you would be tortured and brainwashed some more. You were not in your right mind and you were not yourself. We may not know who you are right this moment, you may not even know entirely but Cap here sure does and even if you aren’t the man you were once upon a time, you are still James Buchanan Barnes and Stevie isn’t about to drop that. So…here’s what’s going to happen-“_

_ Tony had then pushed over a stack of documents that had been sitting atop the conference room table…paper documents. “These are our files, all of our files…we have agreed to show you these because you did not agree to show us yours and we have all read your file, James Barnes-“_

_ “Bucky,” He’d interrupted, voice soft but sure. “Please…call me Bucky.”_

_ Tony hadn’t faltered and merely nodded and carried on, despite the tearful look Stevie had turned on him at that._

_ “So, you’re going to read our files and we’re all going to get on the same page. You are going to recover, here, with us, with Stevie. Anything you need, you’ll have. Anything you want, you’ll get. We ask nothing of you…except perhaps for you not to go all murdery on us, alright?”_

_ Bucky had nodded, stiltedly but he’d nodded nevertheless. “Alright,” He’d agreed, voice quiet and hoarse._

_ He’d do anything they asked if it meant staying near Stevie._

_ “Good,” Tony announced, sitting back further in his chair. “Now that that’s taken care of, I’d like you to take some time to acquaint yourself with our files, ask us questions when you’re ready, eat, sleep, shower, take care of yourself…here, under m-our roof. Bringing you back from the dead is going to happen, but only when you are ready. I have the papers already drawn up, there will be a press conference in your future but not until you are ready and until then, Bucky Barnes…you are to stay here and-“ He chuckled, rolling his eyes at himself. “Bond with the Team, because I do imagine Cap will ask you to join eventually, if she hasn’t already.”_

Bucky had been absolutely _floored_ by the reception, the _ease_ with which Tony _goddamn _**_Stark_** had just…pushed half of his worries aside as if they were _nothing_. Stevie had gone on quietly but no less adamantly afterwards about how Bucky was a Prisoner of War and they would do absolutely anything and everything to make sure he and everyone else knew that just the same. And she’d also been very clear about the fact that he wasn’t _trapped_ here, that he could go if that’s what he wanted but she hoped that he would stay and let them help him. He’d simply stated that _this is where I want to be._

If Stevie had to excuse herself for a moment after that, no one said anything about it.

It had been a very emotional morning for him and he assumed a few others. Not that he let them see that, of course. He knew it was only going to get worse when he asked the ceil-_Jarvis-_if he could have a word with Mr. Stark later that evening. He’d been directed to one of the suites on a higher level-after he’d checked in to make sure Stevie was busy and wouldn’t be asking after him for three-seconds-and was greeted by Stark himself in…his personal apartment apparently.

Bucky tried very hard not to feel like he was being tested here.

Tony had calmly asked him to take a seat on a sofa that looked like it cost more than the apartment building his family used to reside in. He’d taken a seat because Tony was sitting and feigning a casual air across the living room and well, he wasn’t about to go and make the man any more uncomfortable. He was here for a reason, after all.

Reason being…

_“Would you like a drink?”_

_ Bucky cleared his throat slightly, shifting in his spot on the fancy leather sofa. “No, no thank you.”_

_ Tony hummed softly, gaze calculating, unwavering._ _“Something in my file you found interesting?”_

_ Bucky cleared his throat slightly. “Uh, no. I haven’t read any of them yet. There’s-there’s something I wanted to say to you.”_

_ Tony shifted a little, a curious furrow between his brows beginning to form. Bucky’s fingers twitched against his thigh._

_ “If you’re going to apologize, let me stop you right there.”_

_ Bucky stilled, caught off balance._

_ “You were, weren’t you?” Tony mused and Bucky could do nothing but stare at the man. “Well, let me put you at ease, Soldier.”_

_ Bucky barely resisted the urge to flinch, but he was sure his gaze was what made Tony amend his word choice. “Barnes,” He offered, gently. “I do not want an apology from you. I don’t. I knew that we would eventually have this conversation. I’ve been preparing for it for months and yet-“ He shook his head. “No amount of preparation could have prepared me even remotely well enough to handle it.”_

_ He stood up at that and headed towards the kitchen and Bucky was left to watch in quiet as he produced a bottle of scotch and two tumblers. Bucky wanted to protest, truly he did. But he found he couldn’t quite manage to say so._

_ Tony came back only a few moments later with two glasses of the amber liquid. He offered one to Bucky and as if on autopilot, he accepted it. Tony nodded, apparently pleased and returned to his seat. He sipped at his scotch, dark eyes pinned on Bucky, just…looking at him._

_ “It wasn’t you,” Came Tony’s quiet voice, his gaze flickering over Bucky’s features as if he were searching for something. “Couldn’t have been,” He murmured. “Because there is nothing in your eyes, in your face…that speaks to the man who took my parents lives. All I see, is the man who broke from Hydra’s control, came back to himself at a crucial moment to-to” He took a deeper breath. “To stop what Rumlow and his goons had started and put an end to Project Insight. As far as I’m concerned, the man who took my parents lives is long dead so an apology would be wholly unnecessary at this point.”_

_ Tony nodded, as if to himself and lowered his eyes to the glass in his grasp. He took a long sip, relishing in the burn of the alcohol before he shook his head, gaze coming back up to linger on Bucky’s face. “But if it would make you feel better-“_

_ “I’m still sorry, Mr. Stark,” Bucky found himself breathing and he meant it, wholeheartedly so._

_ He shook his head, exhaling shakily as he looked down at the glass in his flesh hand and the amber liquid therein. “I know it means nothing, it can’t change what I did, what was done, what you lost. But I need to say it, want to say it,” He dragged his gaze up to look at the man before him once again. “And it’s not for my peace of mind, either. You deserve more than an apology, you deserve justice and-“_

_ “I will get my justice, Barnes, but it won’t be at your expense, I can assure you,” Tony murmured._

_ Bucky found himself unable to do anything more than nod at the man’s words. He wasn’t sure what he had expected of Tony, but everything he’d experienced so far wasn’t it._

_ Tony gave him a nod in response and then cleared his throat, inclining his head towards the man. “That’s good scotch, best not to waste it.”_

_ Bucky swallowed thickly and nodded, raising the glass to his lips. He took a sip and it was good scotch, truly. He swallowed the lot of it, enjoying the burn of the alcohol, even if it didn’t exactly affect him anymore, he could still enjoy the taste._

_ “Thank you,” Bucky found himself saying and somehow he was certain Tony understood that he wasn’t just thanking him for the drink._

_ “Don’t mention it,” He murmured, watching as Bucky stood and brought his glass to the kitchen, setting it on the counter._

_ He could feel Tony’s gaze on him as he headed for the door and once there, he turned and nodded at the man. “See you around.”_

_ Tony merely hummed as the man let himself out…and if Tony had a couple more drinks before he climbed into bed that night, that was between him and the half empty bottle on his kitchen counter. _

Meanwhile, earlier that day Bucky had spent it in Stevie’s apartment with the blonde attempting not to hover and failing miserably. Bucky tried not to be bothered by it and truthfully, he wasn’t exactly _bothered_, he was just…not entirely used to it, not anymore.

It didn’t help that just about every chance Stevie apparently got, she’d press a hand lightly to Bucky’s arm-the flesh one-or lightly let her fingers brush against _some_ part of him any time they came a little closer. It didn’t _bother _him, it just…sort of threw him a bit. But, he didn’t comment and neither did she and if the light touches made him feel like maybe she was checking to see that he was truly _real _and _here_…well, it reassured him all the same.

He tried to ignore the little-read: _big_-part of his brain that prompted him to wonder when the last time he’d ever been touched like that before, with kindness and intent and-

He swallowed thickly at the thought and forced his body to respond in the way it was _supposed to._ Even if his gut reaction was to flinch and pull away, he knew it would settle in time…maybe even become easier.

_Christ_, but he hoped so. He hated the very thought of flinching if she were to touch him unexpectedly. Unfortunately, he hadn’t really thought about it happening the other way around.

.

Three weeks soon passed by and though it was far from an easy few weeks, it sure as hell was a lot better than what Bucky had been originally anticipating.

He was living in the Avengers Compound for crying out loud. It was sure a step up from their little flat in Brooklyn back in the day, not to mention their lodgings during the War and…Hydra wasn’t exactly known for their hospitality. Bucky cringed at the thought. Being on the run hadn’t been all that better, either. Living in run down motels, abandoned buildings or cars, squatting in the bush even at times…it was _very_ different from how he was currently living. Read: _in the lap of luxury._

Bucky truly did try not to take advantage, only eating what he needed, not asking for more, not that he was ever left wanting for more. He tried to keep lights off if he wasn’t using them, keep the heat low, don’t run the appliances all that often unless absolutely necessary. Though he’d been assured by Jarvis numerous times that none of that was necessary and hadn’t that been interesting? Getting to know an A.I…he’d never thought he’d see the day.

He couldn’t help but notice that Stevie didn’t exactly try and conserve energy or seem to mind all the…extras. Bucky supposed it was because she’d had time to get used to it all, to get comfortable. But of course she’d eventually noticed his hesitancy and told him, _it get’s easier with time. I know it’s all a bit much, but Tony really does look after us and everything actually runs solely on Reactor tech so there’s no harmful effects on the environment._

It was a lot to accept, to just _go with it_, but he was learning. Adjusting. The new wardrobe had been harder to stomach, as was the tech Tony had casually dropped off for him. A touch screen tablet that worked with his hand, a laptop and even a cellphone. All of which he was assured were his to keep and to do whatever he wanted with them. He didn’t even let himself think that there might be trackers in the damn things, certain there was.

Somehow, he was sure that they wouldn’t be used against him so long as he kept his word not to…_go all murdery _on them.

After the gifts, Bucky had tried to make more conversation with the Team. It had…sort of gone well, though it was far from perfect. Clint was…all kinds of special but friendly enough and Bruce was…intimidating. He was very intelligent and that was putting it mildly. He was kind and quiet and overall a pleasant sort of person to be around, once you got past the thought that he could go all Hulk in a matter of seconds if brushed the wrong way.

Natasha was…she was alright. Bucky thought he could like her well enough, hoped that she at least didn’t want to kill him for shooting her and so far Bucky didn’t think she wanted to, not really, anyway. Now he just had to stay in her good books, seeing as she was definitely in Stevie’s. Thor was…a lot, reminded him of Clint’s overall _too-much-ness _but he was friendly and exuberant and his perpetual good mood was endearing, in a way.

Sam was…what Bucky wanted to call a _good-bro_ and where he’d learned that phrase, he didn’t know. But it felt like it truly did work for him. He was obviously close with Stevie, knew her, the _real_ her and Bucky could relate, just a little bit. He was kind to Bucky though he’d demonstrated that he was definitely willing to tease him if the moment called for it. It’d only been a few weeks since his arrival and yet Bucky was sure Sam would be one of those people who would easily fit into his life and then make him miserable with his bad jokes.

So, a pretty good friend then.

And Peter, the Spider kid. He’d been willing to tell Bucky about himself from the start, having given the okay for him to read his file and that was…apparently not to be taken lightly if the _talking to_ both Tony and Stevie had given him was any indication. They treasured that boy, it was clear and really, Bucky could see why.

The kid and he really wasn’t a kid anymore, Bucky saw that. He may be young_er_ but he was smart, strong, funny. The kid was kind, _sweet_ and overall just hilarious to be around. The way he constantly tried to chat up Bucky was becoming more and more endearing every time it happened and if Bucky caught sight of Stevie poorly suppressing a smile every time it happened, _well_ who was he hurting?

The only person Bucky truly hadn’t spent much time around had been Tony and he…Bucky really did want to get to know the man better, despite the unease with which he always found himself experiencing in the man’s presence. After that one on one hadn’t resulted in Tony outright murdering him, Bucky was feeling optimistic in the way of perhaps being able to do this Team thing after all.

The genius wasn’t around all the time, busy in his lab but when he joined them all for dinner or to watch movies or video games and the like, the ease with which he interacted with everyone was amusing to say the least.

Stark was _different_. He was blunt and crass and hilariously entertaining on his good days. He was also frustratingly annoying just about every day as well. The constant jokes, teasing and incessant banter between him and the rest of the group was more than simply entertaining…that is until it was turned on Bucky.

The first couple of times it happened, Bucky didn’t know what to make of it. But then Stevie had laughed, rolled her pretty sky blue eyes and nudged Tony with her hip as they’d puttered about the communal kitchen and then they’d moved on. Bucky hadn’t felt that Tony was trying to be mean towards him, was just kidding around and trying to get him to open up, no doubt. It hadn’t worked the first couple of times, Bucky too startled and off-kilter to really be able to take it for what it was; just friendly teasing.

But he was settling in now and the first time he cracked a half-smile in the genius’ direction, the man had laughed and was seemingly startled by his own reaction to Bucky’s tentative smile. It had been an odd interaction, especially when Tony had soon after fled the kitchen and Bucky had been so _sure_ his cheeks had been tinged with pink as he’d left.

Regardless, Bucky hadn’t been around the man all that much, definitely not alone again either. Not with the genius taking up space in his workshop most of the time, only surfacing for coffee or food when Stevie went and dragged him out and that was…well that was sure something, wasn’t it?

Bucky didn’t get the impression that Tony was avoiding him per-say, but he didn’t seem to really be trying to make an appearance all that often whenever it was just Bucky around. Not that he was on his own often, what with Stevie practically glued to his hip. He hoped he wasn’t reading too much into it but apparently he wasn’t all that good at hiding his concerns when Stevie called him out on it one afternoon.

“You know…you could ask Tony to take a look at your arm for you if it’s givin’ you so much trouble, Buck,” And it was Stevie, of _course_ it was Stevie.

Bucky was a little surprised by the subject, however, instead choosing to focus on the fact that Stevie had picked up on his arm bothering him in the first place. They’d been sitting around the apartment, Bucky with his tablet propped up in his lap while Stevie sketched in one of the no doubt _dozens_ of sketchbooks she’d accrued over the last few years and tried not to be too obvious about the fact that she was sketching _Bucky_. She was shit at it, even after all these years Bucky knew when she was drawin’ him, didn’t take a genius to figure that out.

“It’s alright, just sometimes I get a bit of a shock, s’all.”

Stevie looked at him _very _hard after that and that’s how he found himself dragged down to Tony’s workshop with very little ceremony. A _shock _was apparently a good enough reason to involve Tony Stark and Bucky wasn’t entirely sure if that was a good thing or not just yet.

Once he’d been sat down, Stevie hovering like a nervous mother of course, Tony had done his best to ease any worries Bucky might have had with a very calm and thorough explanation of everything he planned to do to even begin to _look_ at the arm in the first place. Then when he’d started and Bucky didn’t immediately go all murder-bot on him, Tony had been kind enough to explain each and every thing he planned to do thereafter.

It wasn’t until Bucky told him he didn’t need the technical details and that he could go right ahead with whatever he needed to do, that Tony sort of sat back on his little rolling chair and given him a very careful look…before turning his gaze on Stevie.

Stevie…who was wringing her hands nervously from less than a foot away, tensed up instantly and Bucky inwardly sighed as Tony cleared his throat and, “I think we’ll be fine here, Cap. Why don’t you head up and see about dinner plans and we’ll join you in a bit?”

Stevie blinked and once she’d managed to stop wringing her hands, she’d nodded, gazing back down at Bucky nervously. “I’ll be fine,” He found himself murmuring. “Stark’s got it under control.”

Stevie nodded, gently brushing the backs of her knuckles against his good shoulder before she pulled away without another word and headed for the doors. He was surprised when the moment they were alone, Tony cleared his throat and said, “Tony. Call me Tony.”

Bucky merely nodded, gaze flickering down to where Tony had gone back to work on his arm. Time passed by incredibly slowly after that, but Bucky didn’t entirely mind. He let his gaze wander around the workshop, never having been down here before and Tony didn’t exactly tell him not to look, so…

“You know, you could have come to me sooner about this,” Tony sighed and Bucky inwardly grimaced.

“Didn’t want to be a bother.”

Tony’s eyebrow rose but he was only a little bit teasing in what he said next. “You know, you’re sounding an awful lot like Stevie, Bucko.”

Bucky huffed softly but didn’t deny it. “And I’m serious when I say, you’re not a bother. You’ve been getting shocked by this thing for how long?”

Bucky outwardly grimaced at that. “Started about six months ago, comes and goes when it feels like it. Gives me a pretty good jolt now and again.”

“And you what? Just planned on ignoring it for another six months?” Tony chided and Bucky shrugged with his good shoulder.

“Maybe,” And he didn’t sound petulant; _he didn’t_.

Tony huffed, obviously amused and annoyed, even if he did try to hide it. Bucky found himself smiling a little and trying to hide it by turning his face into his good shoulder. Tony blessedly didn’t comment and soon the genius was chatting him up about why he was being shocked in the first place. You know, _on account of this is a piece of shit Hydra invention and I can make you a better one you know._

Bucky blinked, entirely caught off guard. “Pardon?”

“I can build you a new one, a better one. Not gonna’ lie, I’ve been toying with the blueprints I found of this thing in your file and I’ve already got some prototypes in development. I’d love to give you an upgrade if you’d be willing and you know, want that.”

Bucky must have gone unnaturally still, because in the next moment, Tony was sitting back a little and stilling his hands, deep brown eyes settling on his face and taking in the no doubt intensely uncomfortable expression Bucky knew he must be wearing.

“Or not,” Tony said breezily and Bucky blinked, breathing out roughly as the moment was lost.

“It-it’s not that I don’t-“ And _wow_, how was that his voice right now?

It was hoarse and choked and _shaky_ for crying out loud.

Tony blinked, lips parting as his brows furrowed, clearly taking in Bucky’s stupid face that was being stupid and not cooperating whatsoever. “It’s not that I don’t…want that,” He managed after a moment, carefully drawing out the words to give himself time to _think_.

“It’s just…”

Tony raised a brow expectantly and when Bucky’s gaze strayed back to the workshop for anything else to look at except Tony’s curiously pensive face, he found he really needed to nip this in the bud.

“It’s just that you think you don’t deserve it or maybe you think that I shouldn’t _waste my time_ on doing something nice for you-“

“You’ve already given me so much, Tony,” Came Bucky’s rushed confession. “I can never repay you for-“

“_Repay me?_” Came Tony’s incredulous _squawk_.

Bucky stalled, coming up short as his gaze snapped back to the man instantly.

“You don’t need to _repay me_,” Tony blurted. “I-_Christ-_“ Tony muttered, running a nervous hand through his already unruly locks and making an even bigger mess of himself; Bucky tried not to find it too endearing. “_Bucky_…” Tony said, clearly exasperated and Bucky felt completely off-kilter as the man before him seemed to try and _compose himself._

He drew in a deep breath and then sat up a little straighter, gaze fixing on Bucky with a firm determination. Bucky had the vague thought that he was spending far too much time with Stevie because he was pretty sure he’d seen that look _thousands_ of times on her pretty face.

“Bucky,” Tony started, slower and much calmer now; deliberately much calmer now. “You don’t ever, _ever_ have to repay me for anything. Do you understand? _Everything_ you have here is yours, anything you want _is yours_. I want this to be your home, so long as that’s what _you _want. But this is not going to work if you think that you _owe me anything_.”

Bucky wasn’t breathing. He’d heard this in a vague sort of way at their first meeting and Stevie had…she had stressed it to Bucky lots in an abstract sort of way. But Bucky still thought-

“But I thought-“

Tony let out a strangled burst of sound and shook his head. “Whatever it was you _thought_, I’m sure it’s wrong. So let me spell it out another way for you.”

Bucky blinked and watched as Tony took another deep, steadying breath. “Stevie loves you, she _has_ loved you for _so_ long and _so_ hard that just the very thought of it is enough to make my teeth _ache_ from the sweetness of that statement.”

Bucky’s heart instantly leapt up into his throat, but Tony was far from done.

“She is one of the most important people in my life and I wa-_need_ to see her happy because she deserves it and I know that nothing would make her happier than to see her _best friend_, the man with whom she has held a torch for, for all of these years, happy too.”

“Stevie is the heart of this team, Bucky and I-“ He shook his head and let out a deep sigh. “I want to see her happy, the whole Team does and you, _you_ make her happy, so,” He shrugged, the motion easy, comfortable. “I’ll do absolutely everything in my power to give you the life I think you both deserve. A life where you can be you without judgement, in a safe place with food and clothes, a roof over your head and anything else you could possibly want and if at some point your wants change-hers included-and you want to move out and into an apartment in Brooklyn or a cabin in the wilderness or a tropical island, you’ve got my support and my bank account to help you.”

“So,” Tony breathed, sighing with the apparent end of his speech coming to a close. “Do you understand a little better now? Am I making myself any clearer?”

Bucky’s lips parted…and then closed…and then parted again. That was sure a hell of a lot to digest. He let his gaze roam over the man’s face, noting the smudge of grease or something or other on the genius’ brow, the earnestness in his eyes, his slightly dry lips and immaculate facial hair. This was a man who never let the world see him as anything but put together, picture perfect. Yet here he was, bearing something to him that he probably had never had to say out loud before nor did he most likely ever have the intention of doing so and yet he’d just said all that to _Bucky,_ of all people, while sitting here in a ratty _Led Zeppelin_ t-shirt, ripped blue jeans and…fluffy green socks with cartoon Hulk’s face on them.

_Where are his shoes?_ Bucky thought absently.

He really didn’t know what to think about all that, however, let alone what to _say_ to all that either, except, “You’re in love with her.”

_Aand_ that was not what he had intended to say.


	17. Chapter 17

“I-_what?_” Tony blurted, face the perfect picture of shock.

Bucky blinked and then proceeded to talk and _Christ_, where had his sense of self preservation gone?

“You’re in love with her, you-_it’s okay_,” He quickly assured when Tony seemed to flounder, his face paling and contorting in near terror. “I mean I can’t exactly fault you for it, it’s Stevie after all.”

Tony shook his head, jaw dropped and face pale. “I don’t-“

He seemed to falter and Bucky took pity on him, shaking his head a little. “I get it, alright? She’s wonderful and sweet and maybe a bit snarky, okay _a lot_ snarky but it’s_ Stevie_ and-and I know what it’s like to be in love with her. I sort of recognized the signs, just wasn’t really sure it was true until now.”

Tony couldn’t-he really couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t find his breath, too in shock to do anything other than _flounder_ and _Christ_, but Barnes had him figured out. He wheezed and Bucky’s brows pinched, concerned.

“I won’t do anything,” Tony rushed out, finally having found his voice; even if it was hoarse and cracked and maybe a little bit terrified.

Bucky frowned, already shaking his head, lips parting as if to speak but Tony cut him off. “I _swear_ I won’t do anything. She doesn’t know, I never told her and-and I never will. She’s not-we’re not and-“

Bucky reached out then and calmly settled his flesh and blood hand on Tony’s shoulder. The genius flinched and Bucky grimaced a little, lightening his touch. “Calm down a second, would you? Take a couple of breaths. I’m not _mad_, Tony, honestly,” He tried to reassure.

Tony blinked, a cold sweat having broken out across his brow and the back of his neck. “But I-_you know_ that I’m-that-“

Bucky gave his shoulder a light squeeze and Tony exhaled roughly. “And I _told you_, it’s not a big deal.”

“But she’s _yours_,” Tony blurted and watched as Bucky raised a brow rather high at him, face the absolutely picture of incredulity.

“Pardon?”

Tony floundered, shaking his head. “She’s your girlfriend!”

Bucky sat back in his chair, hand slipping from Tony’s shoulder to settle against his own thigh. “Well…that’s news to me.”

Tony made a soft choking sound and Bucky crossed his arms in front of his chest, mindful of the open plates as he fixed Tony with a flat stare.

“What do you mean, _that’s news to you?_” He asked incredulously. “You two are the perfect couple, you’ve known each other since childhood, a romance of the ages! You went to _War_ together, she _rescued you_ and-and then _Chrsit_, but she _found you_ after all these years, you _came back for her._”

“I did,” Bucky replied calmly. “But where did you get this _romance of the ages_ and the…_couple_ thing from?”

Tony made yet another strangled sound and flung his hands up in the air between them. Bucky maybe flinched a little and Tony forced himself to reign in his movements. “She told me that she loved you…” Tony breathed and his voice was rough, filled with emotion and so much damn _longing_ that it pulled at Bucky’s already bruised and battered heart.

Tony seemed to lose all steam at that, slumping back on his rolling stool and covering his face with his dirtied hands. Bucky sighed softly and lowered his arms from their crossed position. “When did she tell you that, Tony?” Bucky pressed gently.

“Before we knew Hydra had infiltrated SHIELD,” He confessed, dropping his own hands from his face, gaze lowered to a spot on the floor.

“So before she knew that I was alive,” Bucky went on, Tony merely nodding in response. “Which means she was talking about me in the _past tense_.”

Tony’s gaze flickered back up and his dark eyes seemed to search Bucky’s face for a moment. “Yes, but-“

“But nothing,” Bucky sighed, glancing down at where he’d settled his arm back on the workbench for Tony to look at. “She may have loved the old Bucky once upon a time, but I’m not him anymore and…she’s not the same Stevie anymore, either.”

Bucky’s gaze was elsewhere while Tony apparently mulled that over, but when he didn’t resume what he’d been doing to Bucky’s arm, the brunet had no choice but to look back at him. Tony was shaking his head, dumbfounded, apparently.

“That’s bullshit, you know,” Tony muttered. “You’re both not the same people, I’m not stupid enough to think that you are, but I-“ He shook his head sadly. “You didn’t see her when she was at her lowest, you didn’t see her when she fought to get you back, even what just the _knowledge_ of the fact that you were _alive_ had done to her. You talk about _recognizing the signs_ but let me tell you something,” He exhaled shakily and met Bucky’s gaze head on. “Stevie loves you with absolutely everything that woman has to give and _then some_…and you may not be entirely yourself yet, but you’re still _you_ and she-she never stopped loving you. She won’t.”

“She fought for you, tooth and nail. She looked for you for months, barely slept, didn’t take care of herself, barely ate, according to Sam. She _needs you_, Bucky…about as much as you need her and don’t try to deny that. You wouldn’t have practically shown up at our doorstep if you didn’t need her just the same and I know you said you’d just needed time but that’s bullshit-at least-partially.”

He huffed softly, still shaking his head. “I think you were afraid to come back, afraid to let yourself be vulnerable with her because you knew you were weak when it came to her…just as she’s weak when it comes to you.”

Tony seemed to deflate entirely after that, slumping back farther on his stool as he pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling a headache coming on. “_Christ_, I must be an idiot to go calling the Winter Soldier _weak_,” He muttered under his breath.

Bucky was silent during Tony’s rant, only now he exhaled shakily, drawing Tony’s attention. “You’re not wrong, Tony,” Bucky said quietly, an unpleasant twist to his mouth. “Well, except the part where you called me the Winter Solider. I’m not him anymore.”

Tony let himself look at this man, _really_ look at him. Because he wanted to believe that, wanted to believe that this wasn’t the same man who had taken his parents lives and so many others and he did, he knew he truly believed that. Had since he’d come back and he’d _seen him_. But now, now it was a certainty.

He knew because there was no way in hell the Winter Soldier would be sitting here in front of him in a pair of ratty black jeans with holes in the knees or a well-worn red long sleeved shirt, sleeves shoved up to the elbows, the neck of which was loose and frayed, with a pair of old boots, miraculously clean despite their wear and tear. Not to mention the _kindness_ and uncertainty Tony could see in the man’s face, so far from the expressionless man he’d seen on that video screen in the basement of SHIELD headquarters before it all went to shit.

His lips were still slightly twisted, but his features were softer now, eyes so much kinder, even with the little crinkles at their corners. They weren’t blank or expressionless any longer, but rather those deep grey-blue orbs were filled with emotion and-but he even had a hint of stubble and his dark hair had been combed and tucked back behind his ears. A far cry from what Tony had once seen of the Soldier.

“You’re really not, are you,” Tony found himself murmuring, voice almost too low for Bucky to hear.

Bucky tilted his head thoughtfully as he looked at Tony, knowing it was rhetorical more than anything. He sighed softly and shook his head. “You going to stop my arm from shockin’ me anytime soon?” He asked, wiggling his metal fingers a bit for good measure.

Tony gave him a wry smile and rolled his eyes, but he was already reaching for his tools again and rolling his stool closer to the man, attention on the innards of the arm. “Yeah, yeah,” He muttered and Bucky found himself relaxing as the man’s lips quirked up in the beginnings of a smile as he got back to work.

They were quiet for a while, only the occasional hum or mutter from Tony as he worked. Bucky didn’t exactly get bored letting his eyes wander around the space but time and time again he found himself letting his gaze settle back on Tony in front of him. The man was the picture of concentration and Bucky simply let himself look.

He was nothing like what Bucky had originally expected, but that wasn’t news. After he’d been given the files on everyone, files he had no intention of ever reading…he had simply started paying more attention to the group, Tony included. The man was supposedly one of the most intelligent people on the planet and really, Bucky hadn’t exactly _seen_ what that all entailed yet, but…he knew the man was certainly no slacker.

Despite Tony being nothing like he’d originally expected, however, Bucky had found that he was rather pleasantly surprised by what he _had_ seen. Tony was _kind_ and that was probably the most important thing to him right now and…_well,_ he wasn’t exactly sore on the eyes, now was he?

“I’m still a little baffled,” Tony admitted, apropos of nothing after a while of companionable silence had passed.

“About what?” Bucky prompted, clearing his throat when it came out a little gruffer than he intended.

Tony’s gaze flickered briefly to his face, but then focused right back on what he’d been doing to the arm. “Well I guess I just thought with you two living together…”

Bucky blinked and then slowly shook his head. “Nothing’s happened between us since I’ve been back…it’s-“ He grimaced. “I want to say _complicated_ but I feel like even that’s a bit of an understatement.”

Tony huffed in amusement and muttered under his breath which only had Bucky rolling his eyes. “But it _is _complicated. I don’t think she nor I expect things to just…go back to normal.”

And Tony didn’t have to look to know that he’d made a face at the word _normal._“But it’s still…everything is still new for me and we’re just learning how to be around each other again and-“ He sighed softly, wistfully even. “Just because I maybe still love her and she maybe still loves me, it doesn’t mean that I can just…I don’t know, walk up to her and kiss her? I feel like if anything _is _going to happen, we gotta’ start from the beginning all over again and despite popular opinion, I’m not so charming anymore.”

Tony huffed a soft laugh and Bucky quirked a smile at the sound. “Popular opinion, huh?” He teased and Bucky’s smile went a little crooked.

“Well, according to some of the interviews of the-the Howlies, I sort of was,” He said, exhalation a tad shaky at the mention of his Team. “And Stevie never was one of the dame-_girls-_“ He corrected, shaking his head. “She was always just…well, _Stevie._”

Tony hummed softly and glanced up into Bucky’s face, expression thoughtful. “I mean, I think I get it? Sort of?” He offered and Bucky laughed lightly. “I mean, the whole _it’s just Stevie_ thing, even if there’s no _just Stevie_ anything. I get that.”

Bucky chuckled at that and Tony smiled wryly at him, sitting back and setting down the tools he’d been using. “So what you’re saying is…you’re not sure how to _woo _her,” Tony supplied and Bucky found himself shrugging with his good shoulder and looking away, an embarrassed flush staining his cheeks.

“I-“ He cleared his throat slightly and did a funny sort of eyebrow raise. “I guess so, yeah. Though I’m still not entirely convinced that she uh, _feels_ anything other than…” And Tony was giving him this sort of _unimpressed with your shit_ faces…and Bucky _swore_ he got it from Stevie.

He snorted slightly at the look and rolled his eyes. “You don’t think she loves you,” Tony said, tone obviously laced with incredulity.

Bucky shrugged, reaching up and rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. “I guess I’m just not sure?” He offered and Tony hummed, folding his arms casually in front of himself.

“You do realize,” Tony started slowly. “That she has literally done every possible thing in her power to get you back, don’t you? And not just once, either, might I remind you.”

Bucky inhaled deeply and let it out just as harshly. “I do know that, but that doesn’t mean-“

“_Bullshit_,” Tony called, _again._ “Do you even hear yourself?”

Bucky huffed, amused despite himself. “We’re friends, Tony. We were friends long before we ever fell into bed together.”

“I get that, I do, but you have to understand that she underwent some crazy government project to _join you_ in a War and then literally _defied orders_ to cross enemy lines to _save you_, only to then _lose you_ and crash that damned _plane_ and then when she _came back _and found out that you were _alive_, she defied her government _again_ to rescue_ you_, only to have you rescue _her_ and _then-_then she found you, _er, _you found her and lo’ and behold-“ He gestured widely to the space around them as if that encompassed enough.

Bucky blinked. “So…what you’re saying is…”

“It’s all been for you!” Tony practically shouted, a hysterical laugh bubbling up. “_It’s all for you, Damian, all for you!_”

Bucky’s brows furrowed. “I’m missing a reference, aren’t I?”

“Oh my God,” Tony breathed, just _beyond _done at this point.

He stood up, pushing his stool away from him roughly, but before he could get very far, cool metal fingers wrapped carefully around his wrist and Tony instantly stilled. “Tony,” Bucky said, tone gentle and understanding.

Tony turned his attention back to the man still seated and found himself searching the man’s face, the calmness there…and the little bit of amusement too. “I’m just pulling your leg, okay? I-I get what you’re trying to tell me and I guess I just-“ He sighed softly and shook his head. “You were right about the not deserving thing with the arm and…I guess I feel like I don’t deserve her now, either.”

“_Bucky_,” Tony breathed, but before he could say more, the brunet was gently raising his flesh hand in a gesture for quiet.

“I know it’s wrong, okay? I know that I deserve nice things, _some_ nice things,” He amended. “But it’s one thing to know and another thing entirely to _feel _like it.”

Tony sighed and flopped himself back down on his stool, gaze never straying from Bucky’s face as the man drew his metal hand back. “Okay,” He said simply and watched as Bucky blinked curiously at him.

“Okay?”

Tony nodded, humming softly under his breath. “Okay, if you know that you deserve nice things then it’s only a matter of time before you feel like you _actually_ deserve them.”

Bucky blinked…and then slowly nodded.

“And that includes being deserving of Stevie’s love,” Tony went on, turning his attention to a StarkPad lying on the workbench beside them.

Bucky huffed and found himself asking, “And what about what _you_ deserve, Tony?”

Tony shrugged, not looking up from what appeared to be specs for an upgraded arm for Bucky, already manipulating the blueprints with ease.

Bucky frowned, knowing he wasn’t going to get any further in their conversation today. He glanced down at his metal arm and swiped his flesh and blood hand over the panels that had been carefully put back into place.

“Thank you, Tony,” He found himself saying as he stood.

Tony did look up at him then and nodded, murmuring a soft, _no problem, anytime_ and Bucky gave him a sincere smile, eyes lingering on the tense lines of the man’s face, _seeing_ the strain there in every little line, every little grey hair that did its best to remain hidden in the older man’s dishevelled locks. His shoulders were hunched slightly and there was that crease between his brow that made Bucky’s own brow ache in sympathy.

Bucky shook his head and murmured a soft, _see you around_ before he headed up to meet Stevie for lunch. He found himself wondering at Stevie and if he were honest, Tony too.

Bucky wasn’t stupid, he knew Stevie looked at him the same as she always did from way back when. That guarded love, adoration and just general Stevie-_ness_ that showed just how much she adored him, only now there was a healthy amount of disbelief mixed in too. Probably due to the whole future and how Bucky somehow, against all odds, was here with her. Bucky got it, truly he did. Because it was the same way he looked at her then and now.

_But_…and that was a big but. He _also_ saw the way she looked at Tony when she thought no one was looking and on top of _that,_ he saw the way that _Tony_ looked at _her_ when he thought no one was looking.

Bucky shook his head in disbelief and plopped himself down on one of the kitchen stools while Stevie, Natasha, Clint and Peter busied themselves around the space making lunch and pouring drinks. Stevie’s soft, _I got it, Buck. Have a seat and I’ll make you a sandwich_ had Bucky smiling as he ducked his head and settled in at the island, Clint’s, _aw, why don’t you make me a sandwich, Nat?_ Prompted Nat to smack Clint’s arm, Peter to snicker under his breath and Stevie to roll her eyes…and a light blush to kiss her cheeks.

Whatever Stevie felt for Tony and vice versa, it was something that had been there before he’d come back to…he wanted to say _ruin it_, but he wasn’t quite sure that there had been anything _to _ruin. Still, he didn’t want to get between them like that now. Knowing the old Stevie, she probably hadn’t worked up the courage to make a proper move, but the _new _Stevie? Bucky wasn’t entirely sure and Tony…he was pretty sure Tony was in the same boat as Bucky in the whole ocean of _not deserving nice things_.

Bucky wasn’t really sure what he was going to do with all the information let alone what he planned on doing about the rising tension happening between Stevie and himself every time they were alone in the apartment together. It was a…good sort of tension, but Bucky knew it would only get worse…or better, depending on how you looked at it.

It was only going to end if one of them decided to man or in Stevie’s case _woman_-up and do something about it. Bucky thought he’d just end up kissing her out of the blue one afternoon and he pictured Stevie just sort of marching up to him with that determined look on her pretty face and-uh…maybe shoving him down to sit on the couch and then…oh…maybe straddling his hips and kissing him senseless. He really hadn’t given it much thought or anything. No way.

Bucky swallowed thickly as Stevie came over and placed a plate in front of him with _two_ sandwiches on it. He smiled and whispered a soft thanks and felt his smile grow when Stevie positively _beamed_ at him in response.

He should maybe get his mind out of the gutter and come up with an actual game plan, either to help himself or Tony…he hadn’t decided yet. Either way, he had to hope that he hadn’t lost _all_ of his charm. He had a feeling he was going to need it.

.

“Come on, Buck, we’re going to be late for dinner,” Stevie sighed, already at the door with a full bottle of soy sauce in hand.

“I’m comin’,” He called, closing his bedroom door behind him and smoothing a hand over his sweater, not that it needed it. “Sorry, I just wanted-“

“_Oh_,” Came Stevie’s soft exhalation.

Bucky looked up, already across the living room and heading towards her. He was met with her wide-eyed gaze, that same sky blue Bucky would always be happy to get lost in. “You okay?” He asked softly, noting the odd look she was sporting.

Stevie nodded and then nodded some more. “Y-yeah, I-I’m good. It’s uh…just you…you look so different,” She explained…or didn’t, depending on how you looked at it.

Bucky swallowed, suddenly even more self conscious about what he’d chosen to wear and wondered if it hadn’t been a good choice. He’d finally had the courage to unwrap some of the items he’d been given a few days after his arrival and he thought he’d try a few on for size. Of course, they’d all fit him rather well and with dinner plans with the Team tonight and then movies in the living room, he thought he’d dress up a little nicer than his usual worse for wear shirts and ratty jeans.

He’d put on a cream sweater that was incredibly soft to the touch and had a simple knit pattern that he thought made it look cozy and that was _before_ he’d even put it on. He was pleased to see that he’d been right in his assumption. He’d also opted for trying on a pair of dark wash blue bootcut jeans and he was far from comfortable when he’d first slipped them on, but…well, they were already growing on him.

“Yeah, I-well I thought-“ He cleared his throat slightly and struggled with what to say and was thankfully saved from having to say anything else.

“No, uh…it looks really good on you. I love the sweater, um…especially,” Stevie confessed and Bucky’s cheeks warmed at the compliment.

“Thank you,” He found himself saying, voice hoarse and more than a little rough.

He cleared his throat slightly and nodded towards the door. “Should we-“

“_Yeah,_” She breathed and Bucky watched as she turned and headed for the stairs, a pretty blush overtaking her features…and stretching to the back of her neck.

_Huh_…

.

It wasn’t long until dinner was underway and the chatter was good, becoming more familiar every day and more than that, it was becoming _normal,_ comfortable too. Bucky was a little on edge unfortunately and though he thought he was hiding it well, Stevie clearly knew him better and did her best to make him feel at ease throughout dinner, trusting that he would come to her if there was something wrong.

After they’d all finished tidying up the kitchen, the Team slowly filtered into the living room with bowls of chips and popcorn, pop and in Tony’s case, _coffee _and Bucky found himself hanging back a bit from the group.

He blew out a slow breath and reached into the back waistband of his pants, untucking the book he’d stashed there earlier. He’d been carrying it around for the last two days, but couldn’t seem to bring himself to reveal it until everyone was present. Everyone being, Stevie, Tony, Bruce, Thor, Peter, Natasha, Clint and even Sam. He watched as most of the group took up their usual seats but before Stevie could get settled on the love seat beside Peter, Bucky cleared his throat.

“Hey, Stevie?” He called softly, the name foreign and yet somehow so goddamn _right_ as it fell from his lips, that he felt his breath _whoosh_ slightly from his lungs.

Stevie stilled from where she’d been bending to pick up the blanket that had fallen to the floor when Peter had bounced onto the sofa in his excitement to claim the seat next to her. Bucky couldn’t see all of her face from here, merely her profile and he watched as her face seemed to pinch slightly before she turned towards him and straightened up.

With the force of that stare directed at him, Bucky found that the other sounds of the group settling in completely disappeared. “Yeah, Buck?” Stevie was whispering, her voice hoarse and choked and he could see that she was trying not to cry, the slight wobble of her lower lip despite her tentative smile gave her away; though the shimmer of her eyes sort of did that too.

“Th-there’s something I wanted to give you…” He let his gaze flicker towards the others, Tony included. “All of you.”

“Oh?” Stevie asked, brow furrowing curiously and Bucky nodded, clutching the little book in his hands and effectively hiding most of it from view.

He knew they had been briefed on the books existence, but no one knew what had become of it. They’d been under the impression it had burned up in SHIELD and Bucky hadn’t done anything to make them think otherwise. He actually maybe sort of left them to believe that it had been kept with Pierce and seeing as he was…

Yeah, so. They thought the book had been destroyed.

“Yes,” He found himself saying, voice steady and firm.

He walked closer to her then, gaze firmly fixed on her and he tried not to let himself crumble in the face of this woman. She watched him carefully as he approached and he could see the others shifting out of the corner of his eye and wondered what they might be thinking of him right then, of this.

Bucky found he couldn’t get the words out, even after practising it for the better part of a month. He exhaled shakily as he came to a stop no more than an arms length from her. He opened the book and held it out to her with his flesh and blood hand and hoped it wasn’t shaking too badly.

Stevie’s brows furrowed as she glanced down at it and then back up into Bucky’s face. She shook her head a little, not understanding, apparently not having realized what _book_ it was yet. Bucky gently pressed it to her chest, forcing her to take it when she didn’t immediately do so.

She closed her hands around it but her attention was solely focused on him. He nodded his head towards it and watched as she seemed to hesitate for a moment and then turned her attention to the book.

He took a step back from her as she looked at the faded page.

He watched as her brows furrowed and the dawning realization of what this was, what Bucky was giving her, moved across her features. He watched the understanding dawn on her, heard the _wounded_ sound she made in response, watched as she snapped the book closed and thrust it at him roughly, sure she would have rather thrown it at his head in that instant and only just managed to stop herself.

“_Bucky-_“ And her voice was _broken_, _devastated_ and Bucky mirrored her expression as he pressed the book firmly back into her now shaking hands; she didn’t take it.

“_Stevie_,” He said, again…and she broke a little more.

“Why are you giving me this?” She demanded, voice hoarse, choked and strangled as if Bucky had his hands wrapped around her throat.

Bucky shook his head, swallowing thickly as he watched her eyes well up with tears. “I trust you to do what is needed with that.”

Stevie’s brows pinched even further and he watched as she snatched the book back roughly and turned to the others. Her wild gaze found Tony’s and Bucky watched in stunned silence as she exhaled shakily and strode towards the genius.

“Burn it, Tony. _Burn it._” She wasn’t shouting, there was no need.

Not when her voice was wounded and scared and _imploring_. Tony tipped his head away from her and she caught the signal they’d used so many times in battle together. She threw the book into the air away from them and in the next instant, Tony’s hand was covered in a gauntlet and the sound of his repulsor firing was echoing in their ears.

The book was nothing more than ash on the hardwood.

Bucky found his shoulders sagging, his entire body nearly doubling over on himself with such an overwhelming sense of relief and in the next moment he felt Stevie’s arms sliding around him. He let himself be hugged and didn’t even flinch nor did he have to fight the urge to do so as she tugged him roughly against her in a crushing hug.

His eyes had closed at some point and he let himself be held and eventually realized that he was hugging her back just as tightly, arms, both metal and flesh alike wrapped tight around her middle and probably hurting her but when he tried to loosen his grip, she only held him tighter.

He held her back just as tight.

He didn’t know how long they stood there like that, only that after a while he felt a reassuring hand land on his good shoulder…and then one on his arm and then there was a smaller hand resting against his back and then another. He let himself be held and held her in turn as the others came to offer their own physical support, even if they couldn’t voice it. It was enough.

.

They did eventually put on a movie, even if it wasn’t for another half hour or so. Stevie had had to excuse herself after they’d all settled in to their respective seats. Bucky had been given Peter’s original seat and though he wanted to feel bad about it, having the warmth of Stevie’s thigh pressed against his own was enough to make him not really care all that much.

While Stevie had disappeared for a few minutes, Tony had sat himself down on the armrest of the love seat and fixed Bucky with a very careful look. “You finally called her Stevie to her face,” As if that explained her departure; it certainly had contributed to it.

Bucky exhaled shakily and nodded, looking up into the genius’ face. “Figured it was about time, yeah. You know…to let her know I’m in here.”

Tony smiled softly at that and reached out carefully to grasp Bucky’s good shoulder. He didn’t say anything to that, but Bucky didn’t really need him to.


	18. Chapter 18

“_Damn it-_“ Stevie cursed and Bucky raised a brow at the sudden outburst.

He’d been minding his own business, reading a book Stevie had brought home with her from one of her trips to the library and he was totally unprepared for this. To be fair, he didn’t exactly think it was something he had to worry about.

Stevie had accidentally sloshed water all over the front of her hoodie while doing the dishes and she was currently holding the hem of her sweatshirt away from her body to avoid the wet seeping through to her skin. She was pouting and Bucky did his best to hide his tentative smile behind his coffee mug as he turned his attention back to the book in his grasp.

In the next moment, however, Bucky found himself glancing up when he felt a presence beside him and…and was struck entirely speechless. Because Stevie had taken off her hoodie, a forest green number, one of her favourites if Bucky suspected, and was-she was wearing a-

“What are you wearing?”

Stevie turned to look at him on her way back to the sink and Bucky blinked. Oh_,_ _right_, that had been his voice, hadn’t it?

“What am I…?” Stevie started to ask, apparently at a loss as to what could have _possibly_ caused Bucky’s question.

Bucky found himself helplessly gesturing to her front and he tried not to let his face heat up in embarrassment when Peter who had been sitting, quietly pouring over some school work at the table with him, barely managed to suppress a snicker.

Stevie glanced down at herself and went to perhaps smooth a hand over her incredibly…_short _shirt, but stopped herself when she realized her hand was still damp with dish water. “A shirt and leggings?” She said, obviously confused, her brows drawn up in well, _utter_ confusion at this point.

Bucky let his gaze flick down her frame and yeah, okay, she was wearing a pair of leggings which had been quite usual for her. She liked wearing leggings in the mornings, on her runs and sometimes in the gym, depending on the workout. So those were normal enough, but the _shirt_ on the other hand, decidedly was not.

“Where’s the rest of your shirt?” He blurted.

Stevie’s eyebrows rose so high, Bucky thought they’d flown off her forehead. “The rest of my…_oh-_“ Stevie laughed, seeming to get it now.

She was shaking her head and smiling at Bucky in that adorably fond way of hers and Bucky tried not to squirm uncomfortably. “It’s a crop top,” She explained, gesturing to herself. “It’s supposed to be like this.”

She was still chuckling softly as she gestured to herself and Bucky let himself look at the long sleeves of the white top, the low scoop at the neck where her collarbones just peaked out from, bypassing the way it stretched across her chest-because _all_ of her shirts did that-and instead focused on the hem…of which was definitely shortened and stopped just at her navel and if she shifted…._ah_, there was her belly button.

“I know, I don’t really get it either,” She was saying and Bucky forced himself to pay attention, snapping his gaze back up to her face and inherently _not _thinking about the swathe of pale skin on display. “But it’s comfortable and I kind of like it, so,” She shrugged and Bucky’s gaze flickered back down to her abdomen, where despite the higher waist of her leggings, he could still make out the outline of her abdominals.

_Christ_, but she’d always had such a tiny waist.

“Right, _sorry,_” He found himself apologizing, gaze snapping down to the book still in his grasp.

“Nothing to be sorry about, Buck,” She laughed, already having turned back to finish washing the dishes. “I know fashion these days is definitely all kinds of different, but it’s not _all_ bad,” She explained.

Bucky merely hummed, picking up his coffee and taking a sip, hoping to keep himself occupied and you know, from saying anything else potentially damning. Though, if he were to quickly look over at Peter, he was sure the kid had caught on and would be giving him a shit eating grin as soon as he dared himself to look.

Too bad Bucky’s mouth hadn’t caught up with his brain just yet. “I know what you mean, though I do miss suspenders.”

Stevie outright laughed at that and Bucky found himself smiling fondly, pleased that he’d been able to garner such a reaction from her. “_Right?_” Stevie chuckled, shaking her head as she busied herself at the sink. “I actually have a few pairs of them and I typically wear them around if I have meetings or anything that requires me to look a little more put together…or sometimes when I’m feeling a little nostalgic.”

Bucky smiled at her, gaze soft and adoring. “I haven’t seen you wear them at all.”

Stevie shrugged a little, gaze focused on the plate in her hands. “Haven’t really had much time to dress up lately, been too busy, too um…focused I guess with other things.”

Bucky hummed softly, letting his gaze flicker across her back, noting the way the muscles in her lower back flexed and shifted as she moved and realized there was a warmth in his belly that seemed to only grow the longer he let himself look. He blinked, not entirely understanding and then-

_Arousal_. His mind finally supplied. _What you’re feeling is arousal, buddy and I know it’s been a while and yay for us! But you really should get a handle on that because you aren’t exactly in the kind of company where this is uh…going to be received well._ Bucky only just barely managed to hide a strangled sort of sound as his entire lower body seemed to tense at the knowledge that he was _being turned on by Stevie_.

“Well, that’s alright,” His brain finally managed to get back on board and he nearly sighed with relief. “But if you like to dress up, there’s nothing that should stop you from looking and feeling your best just around us, Stevie.”

Stevie stilled for a moment and then nodded, turning to cast a happy smile Bucky’s way over her shoulder. “You’re right, Buck. Guess I could stand a bit of TLC,” She chuckled and then went back to finish washing the dishes.

Bucky smiled a little confusedly into his mug and cast Peter a curious look, finally having managed to get a handle on himself. “_TLC?_” He asked the younger man quietly.

“Tender loving care,” Peter supplied, grinning like the complete dork he was.

Bucky huffed, amused and embarrassed and a slew of other things right then. But most of all, he felt _happy_ and he wouldn’t trade that for the world.

.

Things are…well, not _different_ exactly after that. But Bucky notices little things at first. Like when Stevie shows up late to breakfast one morning, having gone out early for a morning run and then gone right back to the apartment to change before coming down to join him and the rest of the Team. Only, she’s not in her usual post workout cool down attire, no leggings in sight.

Oh no, she was clad in a pair of dressy beige wide leg trousers with a high waist…and she was wearing a pair of suspenders over those perfect shoulders hidden beneath a simple black crop top. This one with short sleeves. Bucky was brought out of his staring when he was rudely bumped into…well, hip-checked more like, by…_Tony._

He practically swallowed his tongue when he realized he had been caught effectively staring open-mouthed at the love of his life waltzing into the kitchen and heading for the fridge to pour herself a glass of orange juice. But Tony was grinning at him and waggling his eyebrows suggestively, so Bucky rolled his eyes good naturedly and elbowed Tony lightly in the side for his troubles.

But Bucky also happened to notice the small strip of fabric barely visible against the creaminess of Stevie’s shoulder when the strap of her suspenders tugged her shirt aside a little. It was black too…but lacy. He barely resisted the urge to raise a brow at that. Stevie, wearing _lace?_

Bucky hadn’t been sure what to make of that. He’d known her a long time and _granted_, they were different people now, he still didn’t peg her for a girly girl, not that girly girls were a bad thing or anything. He just…hadn’t really thought that she would be interested in the whole…more feminine aspect of being a woman.

He knew that Stevie was _proud_ to be a woman of course, but she didn’t always go out of her way to flaunt her curves or femininity, either. He grew up with her always dressing different than the other girls. Never wanting to wear dresses or skirts or anything of the sort. Though, he was brought back to one particular conversation where she’d told him that one of the main reasons she insisted on dressing more tom-boyish as she got older was because she wanted to fit in with _Bucky_. Like one of the guys.

The only problem was, Bucky never looked at her as _just one of the guys_. Even when she could sass back with the rest of them and you know, bench press a tank if she was so inclined.

She was still beautiful in a way that Bucky hadn’t seen in a man before and it wasn’t like he hadn’t looked. He’d always been one to consider both sexes, not that he’d ever _told_ anyone that of course. But it just went without saying that he’d never quite met a man he wanted to call beautiful before. But Stevie? He wanted to tell her every morning, afternoon and evening for the rest of their lives…if he could only work up the courage to do so.

Though, if he had, she might not take too kindly to being called beautiful nowadays. But what did he know? It wasn’t like he hadn’t heard _others _tell Stevie she was beautiful. He’d heard Peter just the other morning as they’d walked into the gym together talking animatedly with Stevie as she wrapped her hands, readying herself for a sparring session with the not-kid.

Stevie had been in the midst of laughter, so glorious and carefree and Peter had smiled at her so sweetly and awestruck and told her, “_You know, you’re beautiful when you laugh. I m-mean, you’re always beautiful, but when you laugh? You’re practically the embodiment of sunshine._”

Stevie had kept laughing, obviously amused, maybe embarrassed too as she thanked Peter for his sweet words and Bucky tried not to smile too big himself when he caught sight of the riotous _blush_ Stevie was sporting and a distant memory told Bucky that that blush did indeed go _all _the way down.

So, back to the little things he’d begun to notice. The clothes, for one, were always tasteful, even if they were sometimes a little revealing. It was never an _indecent _amount, not that Bucky thought so anyway. And usually if she did manage to wear something too tight-which was usually _always-_it was that she was sort of oblivious to that fact and not generally something she was doing intentionally.

She never showed off a lot of cleavage, not that he necessarily thought that was distasteful…except that maybe he did, sometimes. He was conflicted on that front, if he was being honest with himself. It wasn’t like he wanted her to _flaunt_ herself…but he uh…maybe wouldn’t mind the occasional glimpse…just for himself, though.

He was only a man, _god damn it._

Things carried on after that easily enough. Bucky sometimes noticed things, sometimes he didn’t. He should have realized that it would come to a head eventually. He just hadn’t entirely thought to expect it right then.

It was late one night, he and Sam having been up playing video games with Clint in the archer’s apartment and he’d opted to give Stevie a quiet night in to herself and spend some time with the guys drinking beer and playing video games and generally eating _all_ of the pizza. He’d texted Stevie around nine-thirty to let her know he’d be getting in late and not to wait up and so when Bucky had slipped into their shared apartment a little after midnight to find it near completely dark, he didn’t bother turning on any more lights on the way to the kitchen.

He kept himself quiet as he went to the sink to pour himself a glass of water, only the light of the moon coming in from the floor to ceiling windows and a lamp left on in the living room lighting the large space, it’s dim light casting odd shadows across the hardwood.

He downed the first glass quickly, eyes crinkling in amusement as he noticed the empty bottle of wine and accompanying wine glass on the counter. He poured himself another glass of water, turning to lean back against the kitchen counter as he sipped at this one a little slower. He was startled not a moment later when he heard Stevie’s bedroom door open, thinking she’d already be asleep and then the woman herself was in his sights and she…she looked like an_ angel _and Bucky wouldn’t be ashamed to admit that in that moment, he thought maybe she was.

Because there was Stevie, beautiful and practically _glowing_ in the moonlight filtering in. She was chuckling softly under her breath and Bucky caught sight of earbuds in her ears and knew that she was probably listening to her latest audio book and hadn’t heard him come in. But that was inconsequential to the rest of the scene he was met with right then.

She was clad in a dark blue robe, the silk catching in the light and looking as if there was an almost silver sheen to the material. It hung open and loose on her frame and he watched in absolute stillness as she went into the living room and rounded the couch, still laughing at whatever she heard in the story.

He continued to watch as she bent and reached beneath the coffee table and Bucky let his eyes trail over the curve of her hip and up along her spine where her gorgeous forever bouncy curls hung over her shoulder as she bent to retrieve something beneath the table.

When she seemed to have found what she was looking for, she straightened back up with a small bottle of…something. He watched, distracted by the paleness of her perfectly milky skin as she bared her leg, propping her foot up on the edge of the coffee table.

He heard the pop of a cap and realized that she had a bottle of moisturizer in her hands and was in the process of coating her palms with the lotion. He found himself shivering as she bent over her leg, dropping the bottle onto the coffee table before she placed her hands over her shin and began to work the lotion into her flawless skin.

Bucky was struck dumb, speechless and he was goddamn _trembling_ as he watched her massage the lotion into her skin, bathed in that low light and the light of the moon. She had reapplied the lotion to her hands again at some point and Bucky watched in helpless fascination as she stood back up properly and shifted her robe open further and Bucky-he stopped breathing.

She was massaging the lotion into her upper thigh, but-but that’s not what Bucky’s sharp gaze was focused on right then. No, he was more focused on the patches of black lace he could see enveloping the supple curves of her body, half hidden by the robe she wore.

She turned more in the light and Bucky breathed out shakily as he watched her pick up the bottle from the table and put a little more between her palms. He was awestruck as he watched the folds of her robe give way to miles of her flawless skin encased in a black lace teddy, so sheer in spots that he could make out the peaks of her nipples, the indentation of her navel…the spot just above her mound.

He barely managed to stifle a groan at the sight of her as she rubbed the last of the lotion on her forearms, having tucked the bottle back under the coffee table into the basket of other assorted creams. And just like that, she’d turned and headed back towards her bedroom, completely oblivious to Bucky having been privy to such a private moment and Bucky was left floundering and helplessly turned on.

His thoughts swam and it was as if all at once he realized what he’d seen. Was there someone in the apartment with her? Is _that_ why she was dressed in lingerie? His vision blurred with the sudden realization, the _possibility_ that she’d been here all evening with someone while he-while he was-

“Jarvis?” Bucky asked, croaked, more like.

“Yes, Sergeant Barnes?”

“W-was uh, was Tony here tonight? Or uh…anyone else?” He asked nervously, barely recognizing the sound of his voice which was no more than a hoarse whisper at this point.

“No, Sir. The apartment has been empty save for Captain Rogers since your departure.”

Bucky let out a relieved breath and nodded. “O-of course, thank you,” He found himself breathing, already heading for the safety of his room, careful to keep his footsteps as silent as he could as he slipped into his bedroom and shut the door behind him.

He pressed himself back against the now closed and locked door and just _breathed_ for a moment or three. He also couldn’t help his gaze from travelling down to where he was tenting his jeans uncomfortably. He didn’t give himself much time to think before he was stripping his shirt off over his head, tossing it aside carelessly as his hands-shaky and fumbling-worked hastily at his jeans, unbuttoning and unzipping them as he stumbled towards his bed.

He let himself scramble onto the slightly rumpled duvet and made quick work of shoving his jeans down to mid thigh and then went to work on shoving his briefs down just far enough to get his cock out. _God_, he hadn’t been this hard in-

He barely spared it a glance before his metal hand was braced against the bedding while his flesh and blood hand wrapped tightly around his cock. He shuddered hard and bit back the noise that wanted to escape him at the feeling.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so torturously turned on, wondered if it had even been in this century or not. His cock felt hot and heavy in his hand, flushed red and near purple at the head and he shuddered as he stroked himself once before he found that he was going to need more than just his willpower to stifle the sounds he wanted to make. He grabbed at his pillow and dragged it closer to him, nearly falling on his face into the plush fabric as he stroked himself again.

He buried his face in the pillow, finally letting out a groan and hoping that Stevie couldn’t hear him across the hall as he started to stroke himself off. He kept his fist tight, hand working frantically to get himself off. He was leaking all over the place, making a right mess of his bedding and he _didn’t fucking care_.

He couldn’t get the image of Stevie dressed up in lingerie out of his head, seeing her look so vulnerably sweet, calm and smiling, _beautiful. _He’d seen her curves before but not quite like this. It’d been _so long_ since he’d really_ seen her_ in this body. _So long_ since he’d seen her so close and so perfect. He never forgot-well, maybe for a little while-what it was like to fall into bed with a smaller Stevie so long ago and then after-after the War had chewed him up and spit him out and Stevie had _saved him_…he’d seen her as she was now, but _different._

She was gorgeous and fiery then but there hadn’t been _time_, never enough time and with the threat of enemy discovery and death at any given moment, their moments together had been fleeting and desperate. There hadn’t been time to _look_, to _touch_ and _feel_ and just…_enjoy each other._ And now? Now they weren’t even together anymore and _Christ_, but she was as gorgeous and fiery as ever and he _wanted her._

He shuddered hard as his back bowed and he was right _there._ When the fuck had he gotten himself to the edge so quickly? He was near manic with the feeling as he stripped his cock with a desperate sort of urgency now. It took hardly any time at all before his thumb had passed over the head of his cock just right, nail digging in to the slit and making him hiss and then he was shuddering, _moaning_ into his pillow as his orgasm overtook him with a near startling force.

He knew he was making noise as he let himself fall apart in the safety of his own room, his own bed, but he was far past the point of caring if he was heard. Well, at least he had managed not to whisper Stevie’s name as he came so hard he was sure he would have seen stars, you know…if he didn’t currently have his face buried in his pillow.

He stroked himself slowly, movements slowing, lengthening as he rode out the last waves of his orgasm as his body shook, breaths harsh and stuttering as he finally managed to turn his face enough to breath in some fresh air. His chest was rising and falling rapidly as he took in deep lungfuls of air, struggling to get his frantically beating heart back under control where he was pressed into the mattress from belly to cheek.

His hand was coated in his release and he shuddered a little as he let go of his softening cock, forcing himself up higher onto his knees as he made himself sit upright a bit more. His breathing was shaky at best as he forced himself to move to his bedside table, head fuzzy and vision a little hazy as he plucked a couple of tissues up from his bedside table.

By the time he flopped back down on the bed, landing and bouncing lightly on his back, pants still shoved down around his thighs and cock just…hanging out there, he couldn’t believe what he’d done. Guilt slowly crawled its way up his spine and he gingerly tucked himself back into his briefs before kicking off his jeans the rest of the way.

He lay there for nearly an hour, heart having calmed considerably but his mind was a mess of emotions, chest tight with them too. He breathed out roughly, forcing himself to finish undressing before he slipped beneath the covers of his too big bed. He knew sleep wasn’t going to come easy to him, not with conflicting thoughts of Stevie swirling about his head.

He loved her, of course he did. He just…knew that maybe she didn’t love him the same way any more. She was clearly interested in Tony, maybe even loved him. He was actually pretty sure she loved him and he wanted Stevie to be happy. _More than anything_, did he want that. Would she be happier with Tony? _Yes_, he found his mind whispering and Bucky shivered.

Tony was a good man, deserved to be happy all the same and Bucky believed that. Wholeheartedly did he believe that…just as he believed he didn’t quite deserve to be happy in the way Tony had told him he should be. He maybe deserved _nice things_ from time to time, but _nice things_ didn’t stretch so far when the only _nice thing_ Bucky truly wanted was Stevie…or at the very least, Stevie’s happiness.

And besides, with no thanks to him he felt that she was well on her way to being happy. She smiled almost all the time nowadays. She laughed and teased the others, let herself be teased in turn. She had fun with the Team-her _friends_-whenever they got together to watch movies or play video games, even the occasional board game too. Bucky thought she was quite happy, even when she was just relaxing in the apartment or common areas, reading or sketching until her hearts content.

There hadn’t been much in the way of missions as of late, not since Bucky’s arrival a little over two months ago. She did have to go away for a few days now and then, but she had been able to stay in contact with Bucky back at the compound and Bucky hadn’t felt too left out. He did have the others to bum around with while she was gone, even if he wasn’t cleared to leave the compound just yet. Though, Bucky was discussing things with Tony and a few other important people about the _coming out_ process he would soon be undergoing and that would allow him a bit more freedom.

Not that he was in any hurry to get away or anything. He just thought it might be nice to go for a walk and visit the Library on his own or even a coffee shop when he felt so inclined.

Regardless, Bucky thought they were doing alright as is. Stevie was happy, he was quite happy too and he thought he knew what would make Stevie even happier. _Tony_. Surely he was the answer, now he just had to make sure Stevie saw that, Tony too.

Now if he could also stop thinking of Stevie in more than a friendly sense, things would get there a hell of a lot faster. Though, to be fair, seeing Stevie in lingerie was sort of playing dirty. Because really, who could resist a sight quite like that? Bucky was just a man, after all.

A man still hopelessly in love with his best friend.

Bucky sighed, twisting onto his side and frowning. “_Hopeless,_” He mumbled. “Absolutely hopeless, Barnes.”

.

“Hey, Stevie, pass me the coffee pot, would you?” Tony asked from his spot at the kitchen island.

There was a moment of silence and then…a couple more.

Tony blinked, shifting in his seat as he turned to look over his shoulder to where Stevie had been busy preparing sandwiches. “Stevie?” He asked again, noting that she hadn’t moved and was actually still standing at the counter, staring down at all the fixings she’d been putting together.

Tony frowned and glanced to where Bucky had just raised his gaze from the book in his grasp to look at Stevie. He was frowning a little when he caught sight of the woman. She was incredibly still, her breathing steady, even. They couldn’t see her face from here, but they could tell she was looking down at the meats and cheeses in front of her.

Bucky’s head tipped slightly to the side and he found himself calling out a little louder than Tony to her. “Stevie?”

Her blue eyes were instantly locked on his and Bucky barely had a moment to look into them before she was turning back to her task, that unnatural stillness from before long gone. “Yeah, Buck?”

Bucky glanced curiously to Tony and then back to Stevie. “Could you bring over that coffee, pot? Think Tony and Clint would like a refill,” He asked, chuckling softly.

Stevie hummed, murmuring an _alright_, _just a second_ and then she was finishing putting together a couple more sandwiches, popping them onto a larger plate and picking up the coffee pot as she made her way to the table. She gave Tony a soft smile as she placed the plate down onto the island between him, Bucky, Clint and Peter and then set the coffee pot down for him to take too.

“Thanks, uh…is everything alright?” Tony asked her, picking up the carafe and pouring first himself a cup and then refilling Clint’s mug.

“Hmm?” Stevie asked, already heading back to the counter to fix a few more sandwiches for her and Bucky.

“Well…I just tried to call you a couple of times but you uh…didn’t hear me?”

Stevie blinked, staring down at the pieces of bread she’d just lain out. “Oh, I’m sorry. Must have been distracted. Dd you just want the coffee?” She asked, looking over her shoulder and giving him a soft smile.

Tony found himself squinting a little. Something wasn’t quite right. “Uh yeah…I’m good with just the coffee,” He agreed, smiling softly back at her if only to get that awful pinched expression on her face to loosen.

What was wrong?

Stevie nodded, already turning back to her task and Tony shot Bucky a curious glance. But the man was already looking at him with a frown firmly in place. Tony shrugged and Bucky’s frown only deepened as he glanced back to where Stevie had finished plating up a few more sandwiches and was coming over to drop them off.

“Here you go, Buck,” She murmured, almost absently as she set the plate down in his reach and for a moment, Bucky just stared.

Stared because she didn’t quite look like herself today. There was a tightness around her eyes, a lack of light even therein. He wanted to ask her what was wrong, but with the others sitting at the table, he wasn’t sure it would be appreciated. She’d already said that she was probably distracted, she’d only get annoyed if they kept asking.

So, he kept quiet and merely thanked her as she turned back to the counter to clean up the extra fixings she’d left out. Tony, Clint and Peter were just short of inhaling the sandwiches she’d made for them and Bucky couldn’t help rolling his eyes when Tony seemed to shrug a little guiltily as he finished the last of the coffee.

“I can make another pot,” Tony told him.

“Yeah, sure,” Bucky mumbled, glancing back towards Stevie.

She was still busying herself and in the next moment, Tony was getting up and heading in her direction. She was standing beside the coffee maker after all and Bucky let his gaze flicker back towards Stevie…and noticed that she was once again still and the hand that she had resting on the counter top was…was shaking.

Bucky barely had a moment to digest that fact before Tony was there beside her and without much thought, he went to rest a careful hand on Stevie’s shoulder as he leaned past her to set the carafe back on the coffee maker.

The carafe never made it.

Stevie turned in the blink of an eye, Tony’s hand having barely made contact with her shoulder before she had him spun around and his arm twisted uncomfortably behind his back. His gasp of startled pain and surprise echoed around the kitchen and no one barely dared to breathe until, “_Stevie,_” Bucky whispered.

She was breathing shakily as she seemed to come back to herself all at once. She blinked hurriedly and instantly released Tony’s wrist, the genius wincing and letting himself slump against the kitchen counter for a brief moment before he was calmly turning around.

His face was the perfect mask of composed and concerned as he met Stevie’s gaze head on. She looked panicked and wild, _spooked_, Tony’s brain supplied.

“I’m so sorry, Tony,” She breathed, gaze flickering over him in concern. “I-I don’t know-“

“It’s alright,” Tony quickly insisted. “No big deal, I startled you. It’s my fault.”

“No it’s not!” She blurted, eyes wide and beyond panicked. “_Tony,_ I could have really hurt you.”

“I’m good,” Tony insisted again. “Honestly, you just caught me off guard. It-I’m fine, alright?”

Stevie shook her head, taking a quick step back from him. She didn’t expect to nearly bump into Peter, Peter who had gotten up from the table because he’d been worried about all the broken pieces of the carafe now littering the kitchen floor. Stevie was barefoot.

“_Careful,_” Peter warned and didn’t think twice about putting his hand on her bicep to steady her.

She flinched bodily away from him and Peter frowned, obviously concerned. “What-“

Stevie looked stricken by her reaction and she couldn’t help looking down at Peter’s outstretched hand. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean-“

“_Stevie_, calm down,” Bucky breathed, having risen from his seat to approach her.

She instantly deflated, shoulders dropping and a terribly _wounded_ look crossing her face. “I’m sorry,” She apologized again, glancing nervously to Tony and then back to Peter. “I just hadn’t…expected your touch.”

Bucky blinked, realization dawning on him then. She had _bags_ under her eyes for chrissakes. “Come here, Stevie,” Bucky found himself ordering.

He kept his voice steady but soft and watched as Stevie’s gaze snapped to him instantly. She didn’t move, however. Bucky huffed softly and raised a brow at her in question. “Why?” She whispered and Bucky was grateful that no one had the bright idea to say _because he said so_.

“Because…I can see those bags under your eyes that tell me you haven’t slept. So…you’re going to go sit on the couch in the living room, I’m going to bring you a few sandwiches to eat and you’re going to let me deal with that foot you’ve managed to get glass in and _then-_“ He continued, bowling over her as she started to try and disagree. “And _then_, I’m going to wrap you up in a blanket and make you watch _Dog Cops_ with me and the others until you take a nap.”

Stevie merely stood there looking dumbfounded…for all of three-seconds, before she sighed deeply and pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration. “Okay.”

Bucky huffed but nodded, glancing towards where Tony was giving him an impressed look and Peter was smiling a little nervously beside him. “Right then,” Bucky huffed. “Be careful with that foot and don’t step on any more glass. Pete, how about you help her to the living room and I’ll be right there with the-“

Clint, who had been suspiciously quiet, tossed him the first aid kit from on top of the fridge. “First aid kit,” Bucky finished.

“And sandwiches,” Tony mumbled, already picking up one of the plates.

“And sandwiches,” Bucky agreed with a heavy sigh, already following Stevie into the living room.

Peter was hovering near her in case she needed his assistance, but at no point did he reach out to touch her and for that, Stevie appeared grateful.

She sat down heavily on the sofa and Bucky knelt down near her knee. Peter shifted awkwardly beside him and Bucky cast him a grateful smile. “Why don’t you go check on Tony? Maybe throw a bag of peas on his shoulder for good measure,” He suggested, nodding his head towards Tony who was holding the plate of sandwiches and looking a little strained around the edges.

“Yeah, good idea,” Peter agreed, already heading in the genius’ direction.

Tony huffed, having heard and instead of putting up a fuss, he set the plate down on the sofa next to Stevie and then let Peter hustle him back into the kitchen.

By the time Bucky had turned his attention back to Stevie, she wasn’t looking at him anymore. Wasn’t looking at _any _of them anymore.

Bucky sighed and opened up the first aid kit, starting to pull out everything he’d need. Once he pulled on a pair of gloves and picked up the tweezers, however, he was forced to make a move. “You going to let me get the glass out?”

Stevie made a soft noncommittal noise and Bucky very nearly rolled his eyes. She did, however, lift her foot a bit and extended it to him, so he figured that was the best he’d get at this point. “Alright then, keep still. I’m going to touch you now,” He murmured, careful to telegraph his movements, even if he wasn’t exactly making eye contact with her just then.

She didn’t flinch from him as he closed his right hand around her ankle and raised her foot up higher into his line of sight. She let him move her foot as he saw fit, even leaning back farther against the sofa when he tipped her leg just a bit higher. She didn’t say anything, but Bucky could feel her eyes on him as he carefully got the tweezers in place over the single piece of glass embedded in her foot; grateful at least that it wasn’t too deep and there was only a little bit of blood.

“Gonna’ pull the glass out now,” He told her and then gently yet swiftly, plucked the glass from her skin.

She huffed softly as he pulled it free and he carefully set it aside on a paper towel on the coffee table before he started in on cleaning the wound. It was quiet while Bucky tended to her injury and Bucky didn’t want to disturb it, but he really did feel like it was important that he say _something_ about what had happened.

So…

“You been havin’ nightmares?”

Steve shifted a little on the sofa, but didn’t move her foot from his careful grasp. “It’s no big deal, Buck.”

Bucky hummed. “That’s not what I asked, Stevie,” Now having finished cleaning the shallow wound, he simply let it dry, very nearly watching as the cut practically started to close before his eyes.

Stevie sighed, picking up a sandwich from the plate beside her and Bucky let his gaze drift up to her, watching as she fiddled with the food but didn’t move to eat it. “Just the last couple’a nights,” She admitted, voice quiet, reluctant. “They’ll stop and I’ll get proper sleep soon enough. It’s nothing to worry over.”

Bucky hummed. “That may be true, but that’s not the first time you’ve flinched when someone touched you as of late,” He said gently.

“I-I know,” She agreed, exhaling shakily. “But I’m working on it-“

“I don’t need you to _work on it_, Stevie,” Bucky explained patiently. “I need you to _talk_ to us about it.”

Stevie frowned, looking down at the sandwich in her grasp. She wasn’t even hungry. “I don’t want to bother you with-“

“Don’t you dare,” Bucky warned and Stevie frowned meeting his gaze. “You’re having dreams about Rumlow…me…what happened in that basement-“

“It doesn’t matter,” She interrupted, tone a touch harsh and Bucky huffed in annoyance as she pulled her foot from his grasp and stood up, abandoning het sandwich on the plate and heading for the stairs.

“Of course it matters!” He called after her, ignoring the shifting Team members in the kitchen as their gazes followed Stevie’s path across the living room.

“It doesn’t!” She snapped back, turning on her heel to look at him. “I’ll get over it, you don’t need to baby me-“

Bucky almost, _almost_ grabbed her wrist but only just managed to stop himself. “I’m not babying you, Stevie. I’m _trying_ to make you understand that your feelings _do_ matter and that you being uncomfortable with people touching you is _okay_, especially given what he-what I-“

“_Don’t-_“ She breathed, stopping short of the edge of the kitchen. “Don’t-don’t talk to me like you think I’m _breakable_. I’m not _scared_ to be touched by you or my friends, I’m not. I know it wasn’t you in that room, Bucky-I just-I have it handled, alright? I’ve been handling it for months already. It just-I wasn’t-“ She shook her head, frowning as she caught sight of Tony, the man having rounded the kitchen island to try and get closer to her, Peter in tow.

“You weren’t quite focused enough to realize you were surrounded by your friends,” Bucky said, tone gentle. “I know you’re not breakable, Stevie, I do. _We_ do and I’m glad you’re not scared of us getting close,” He agreed. “But that doesn’t change the fact that Rumlow-that _I _touched you without your permission, without your _consent_ and that you’re struggling with it more than you let on. And I know you keep saying that you’re _handling it_, but there’s nothing to handle, Stevie. You’re allowed to feel the way that you do, but you don’t need to hide it or pretend that it’s not a big deal. Would you tell someone else who had been in your position that it wasn’t a big deal if they flinched because someone got too close?”

“_No_,” Stevie breathed, emphatically. “Of course not, but I-”

“But nothing,” Bucky said firmly. “You can talk to us about this, Stevie. We _want_ you to, because _none _of us _ever_ want you to feel like you can’t be comfortable in your own home.”

“I am comfortable,” She said, a touch petulantly, drawing her arms about her middle in an all too familiar protective gesture.

Bucky sighed, shaking his head. “You didn’t _look_ comfortable when you had Tony in a hold.”

Stevie made a desperately soft noise and looked to Tony in apology. “I am sorry, Tony.”

“I know, Stevie. But you really don’t need to be. I did touch you without your permission,” Tony tried to console.

Stevie shook her head firmly. “But you always touch me-_I mean-_“ Her eyes widened at what she’d said, cheeks colouring a little as Tony smiled cheekily at her. “You’re just very handsy-uh…in a friendly way,” She rushed to correct and blushed even harder.

Bucky snorted and Stevie’s gaze flickered back to him, annoyance flitting across her features for an instant; there and gone.

“I know, Stevie and I should watch myself more carefully,” Tony explained.

“Me too,” Peter admitted, just about ready to scuff his toe against the floor with how adorably sweet he was looking.

Stevie’s heart broke a little at the sight. “Neither of you have to be careful. I like the friendly touches we share, I do. I just…I was distracted, in my own head dealing with uncomfortable thoughts that I…that I should be dealing with and-“ She grimaced, looking to Bucky and sighing deeply. “_Talking_ to you guys about, apparently.”

Bucky hummed softly in agreement and Stevie frowned, crossing her arms in front of her chest as she let her gaze drop to the floor. “I…_was_ talking about it…for a while with-with Sam,” She admitted and Bucky raised a brow at that, obviously pleased that she was talking to _someone_ at least. “And I _was_ doing better with it all, honest. Just…sometimes, bad dreams get in the way of progress.”

She shrugged a bit and Bucky sighed, walking towards her and with his closer presence, she was forced to look up at him. When she did, Bucky smiled at her, not unkindly as he shook his head slowly. “I get it, Stevie. Truly I do. But you don’t need to keep it to yourself, alright? If you’re having an off day, say so and we’ll do our best not to step on your toes.”

She pushed out a rough breath and nodded and in the next moment she was stepping in closer to Bucky and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Bucky didn’t hesitate to draw her in closer, slipping his arms around her middle and pressing his cheek against hers.

“Okay,” She found herself agreeing, breathing out and ruffling his hair as she held onto him tighter than she thought she ought to; though, trying to get her to stop would be futile at this point.

Bucky hummed softly and rubbed his stubbled cheek against her, prompting her to squirm and laugh as it rubbed a little uncomfortably against her softer skin. Bucky laughed too as she drew away-a tad reluctantly-and he let her, watching as she reached up to rub a little at her slightly pink skin where he’d rubbed his light stubble against her. But she was laughing, so there was that.

“You’re such a jerk,” She muttered and Bucky’s grin was positively _blinding_ as she turned back to the others while casting him a sideways glance and trying to stifle her own dorky smile as well.

“Thanks guys, I’m sorry for disrupting lunch. You guys should finish up those sandwiches, I think I’m going to go draw or-“

“Oh no you don’t,” Bucky interrupted. “You’re going to come lay down and nap while we watch _Dog Cops_, I already told you.”

Stevie rolled her eyes, but she was still smiling so Bucky figured he’d won this round. “_Fine_, at least let me go to the bathroom first?” She teased and shoved lightly at his good shoulder, Bucky instinctively letting her push him back a bit.

Bucky merely hummed and waved her off, already heading back over to the sofas to gather up a couple of pillows and blankets. Stevie rolled her eyes as he went and glanced back to where Peter, Tony and Clint were smiling softly to themselves and watching the exchange.

She couldn’t help letting her gaze slip over Tony’s frame and noted that he was standing a little stiffly with a bag of peas wrapped haphazardly with a tea-towel pressed to his shoulder by an all too eager to help Peter. Her brows instantly creased in concern.

“I’m sorry, Tony, I really am,” She apologized.

“Don’t worry about it, really,” He consoled. “It doesn’t hurt all that much, just caught me off guard. I’ll be fine in a bit and besides,” He chuckled, smiling wryly at her. “At least you didn’t dislocate my shoulder _or _break my wrist.”

Stevie huffed, cheeks colouring wickedly as she nodded, hand reaching up to rub self-consciously at the back of her neck. “I suppose I’ll count that as a win then.”

Tony grinned at her. “That’s the spirit. Now hurry up and leave so you can come back and curl up on the couch with us.”

Stevie barked out a surprise laugh at that and nodded, already heading for the bathroom down the hall. “Alright, alright, be back in a few.”

Tony just hummed and clasped his hand over his shoulder to hold onto the makeshift icepack to take over for Peter.

While the three made their way into the living room to get settled, Bucky couldn’t help but ask. “Is there something I’m missing? I feel like there was a jab there about wrist breaking,” He admitted, raising a brow curiously at the genius.

Tony laughed and sat down on the sofa at one end, moving the plate of sandwiches to the table in front of him where Clint snatched up a couple for himself eagerly. “You’d be right,” He agreed, grinning stupidly to himself.

Bucky shook his head, looking over to where Clint was snickering under his breath and Peter was looking between the pair curiously. “Wasn’t there an incident early on? Like, when she first uh…woke up?” Peter asked.

Tony nodded. “Yeah, one of the very first charity galas she attended with the Team. A Congressman-“

“That’s right!” Peter crowed. “Didn’t he grab her?”

Tony hummed, nodding and Bucky’s eyes widened. “Grabbed her ass and let me tell you, I’ve _never_ seen Stevie go from perfectly put together to _I’m going to rip you limb from limb_ in a matter of _seconds_ like she did that day.”

Bucky barked out a surprised laugh and Tony grinned as he attempted to cover his laughter with a hand over his grinning mouth. “_Oh-_“ Bucky managed through his laughter. “I have.”

Peter was all ears, an eager smile on his face while Clint was smirking and Tony was watching him with an intensely curious expression on his face. “Oh?” Tony prompted and Bucky shook his head, still grinning.

He cleared his throat a bit. “That Congressman? _Definitely_ not the first higher up to try something sneaky like _copping a feel_,” He admitted. “Stevie usually put them in their place pretty quickly though. That is, beneath the sole of her boot.”

Now it was _Tony’s_ turn to bark out a surprised laugh. “Yeah well, she _did_ break this guys wrist in front of like…a good two-hundred people-“

“_And_, she pressed charges for sexual harassment and of course she won. Dude ain’t no Congressman anymore,” Clint offered, grinning like an idiot.

Bucky shook his head, grinning like a fool himself “No shit?” He asked rhetorically and Tony smirked at him.

“So let’s just say, I’ll count myself luck my shoulder only aches a little bit,” He conceded and Bucky smiled at him.

“What are you lot on about?” Came Stevie’s voice and they all turned to where the woman was standing with her arms folded in front of her chest with a pointedly raised eyebrow.

“Dirty men copping a feel,” Tony filled in for her and they all watched, absolutely _delighted_ when her cheeks positively _blossomed_ with a blush.

“_Oh,_ you mean that time you copped a feel?” Stevie asked, looking pointedly at Bucky with an only _half_ annoyed expression on her pretty face.

Bucky blinked, lips parting and then, “_No?_”

Stevie stilled, caught off guard and her cheeks only darkened in her embarrassment. “What-“ Clint started, while Peter blinked owlishly at her and Tony-

“You copped a feel? Wh-what did she do?” Tony asked, way too giddy and curious to even think of hiding his amusement.

Bucky huffed, rubbing the back of his suddenly burning neck with the metal hand in hopes of cooling it down a bit. He glanced up through his lashes at Stevie. Stevie, who was staring in open-mouthed shock and embarrassment at having revealed something she maybe wasn’t entirely comfortable discussing. Bucky figured he’d save her.

“Eh, I deserved it,” Bucky offered, shrugging and trying to suppress his own embarrassed smile. “She smacked me upside the head.”

“I didn’t mean to,” Came her soft-_petulant-_defence, meanwhile the other three had burst out laughing and barely managed to hear her.

“I know,” Bucky chuckled despite himself. “At least you weren’t super-powered yet.”

Stevie only somehow blushed _further_ at that…and then swatted him with a pillow before flopping down on the couch beside Tony, purposely leaving space between her and Bucky. “You all suck, just so you’re aware,” She stated.

Still petulant then.

Bucky grinned and took the pillow, tossing it to Tony who caught it and settled it onto his lap, Bucky winking at him when the genius looked at it curiously. Stevie was too busy huffing and knocking Clint off the back of the sofa to notice when Bucky mouthed, _you’ll need that shortly._ Tony figured he’d figure it out eventually.

Of course, eventually was less than twenty-minutes later with the sandwiches finished along with the hot chocolate Peter had insisted on making for everyone as they settled in to watch _Dog Cops_ and Stevie was already listing towards Tony, eyelids heavy and cuddled up under at least two blankets.

All Bucky had to do was offer to check on the surely already healed cut on her foot and then just…_not_ release her foot and somehow manage to get both of them tucked up in his lap where his flesh and blood hand idly rubbed them.

So it was only natural that she give in eventually when Tony offered her a spot to lay down with her head on the pillow in his lap. Tony now understood what the pillow was for at least. What he _didn’t_ understand, however, was _why_ Bucky was letting her curl up with _him_ in the first place…and not Bucky himself.

He found that he really couldn’t dwell on it for long, not when he had his careful fingers carding through the blonde’s curly locks, the softness of the spun-gold strands slipping like water through his fingertips.

He exhaled shakily at the feeling and let himself look down at the woman lying-_sleeping-_with her head against the pillow in his lap and couldn’t help smiling as he let himself look at her peaceful features, lax in sleep, her soft pink cheeks sleep warm when he let his thumb trail beneath the smudged line of her lashes where they kissed the tops of her cheeks.

She was beautiful, in every sense of the word.

He exhaled shakily and made himself stop caressing her, simply letting his hand rest carefullyagainst the top of her head, fingers buried in her hair. Something he’d done dozens of times, many of which were just like this. But that had been _before_ Bucky had come back.

He cast a careful look to the man at the opposite end of the couch and found him dozing, at least…it looked that way. He still had his hand resting lightly on the woman’s ankle beneath the blanket, but his head remained tipped back against the sofa and he was so still, his soft breaths coming even and steady, his lips slightly parted as he slept.

The fact that he’d been comfortable enough to sleep with the rest of them in the room was a small miracle and Tony found himself smiling as he forced himself to look away, happy that Bucky felt safe enough to do so. But Tony couldn’t help letting himself glance back over to the man once more and thought he saw a soft smile on Bucky’s sleep soft lips. Tony exhaled shakily and looked away, his cheeks heating at the thought of being caught staring.

Bucky was attractive, it wasn’t like Tony would get in trouble for just _looking_, right? He inwardly grimaced and let his gaze focus back on the television, even if he wasn’t exactly paying attention to what was on it.

And it wasn’t like Tony was _ashamed_ of finding Bucky attractive, not at all. Tony hid his suddenly wry smile, apparently realizing that he wasn’t done with this line of thought. He’d experimented in college of course and he knew he didn’t have a preference. He’d always enjoyed being with women and men just the same. He tended to feel like he was in a more dominant position with a woman and didn’t mind it one bit. Though, when he was with a man? He inwardly cleared his throat at the though and tried not to shift where he sat.

He maybe leant a little more towards the submissive side of things with a guy.

He tried desperately not to cast the man another glance, knowing it wouldn’t be a wise move on his part. But…he looked, okay? He looked and he found his gaze softening as he just _let_ himself look.

Yeah, _okay_, Bucky was handsome and kind, _sweet_ when he wanted to be, patient too and he definitely wouldn’t mind having a big guy like him bend him-

Oh _for crying out loud!_ He wrenched his gaze away and willed the sudden blush from his cheeks. Tony Stark did not blush, he tried very hard not to, at least. He inwardly grimaced and exhaled slowly. Only to have his mind diving for the gutter again when he let himself picture Bucky bending _Stevie_ over-

He couldn’t help the soft noise from escaping him at the thought, embarrassment and arousal warring within him. This was not the most appropriate time nor place to be having these sorts of thoughts. Not that Tony’s brain and dick quite got the memo.

He forced his body to relax further into the cushions and this time purposely focused his attentions on the show so that he didn’t have to think about-well, _that._

Little did he notice, Bucky had been quietly watching him out of the corner of his eye and if his nostrils flared just a little when Tony had made that tantalizing little sound, _well…_not like anyone else noticed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, it's going to really pick up from here on out, I promise. I'm sorry if you've felt like the last couple of chapters haven't been entirely entertaining. <3


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a snippet. <3 I promise I have more written.

“Hello?”

“_Hey, I have something for you and Bucky bear.”_

_ Ah_, Tony then. Stevie sighed, tucking the phone between her ear and shoulder as she busied herself with putting her second batch of cookies into the oven.

“Oh yeah? What did you buy us this time? More Cap stuff?” She teased and smirked when Tony spluttered over the line.

_“No, I didn’t buy you anything. Though if you want me-“_

“_No-_“ Stevie huffed and she could practically _hear_ Tony’s grin when he next spoke.

_“Fine then, spoil sport. Anyway, no I didn’t buy you anything. Pep found a trunk of yours in storage. It uh…Howard had it.”_

Stevie stilled, pausing as she removed her oven mitts. “What?”

_“He had a few of your things put away, aunt Peggy apparently helped him gather up some of your belongings. I recall him mentioning having it, but it was so long ago and I forgot about it entirely,_” Tony admitted and Stevie nodded slowly.

“So…there’s a trunk-“

_“Yeah, full of your stuff and a few other things I imagine. I know Howard talked about keeping some USO reels-“_

“Oh dear God,” Stevie breathed, brows pinching and face contorting in horror.

Tony barked out a laugh. _“I know, I can’t wait to watch them-_“

“No, no, that’s-_no,_” Stevie said seriously.

Tony snickered and Stevie rolled her eyes, _hard._ “So okay and you said you had something for Bucky?”

_“Yeah, there-well apparently SHIELD had a box in evidence that they’d secured when Pierce’s home was raided. There are some of Bucky’s belongings in there,_” Tony explained, voice a touch more subdued.

“Oh,” Stevie murmured, quiet and a tad unsure. “H-has anyone looked at what’s inside?”

Tony breathed out slowly over the line. _“Fury said he opened it. There’s nothing harmful, nothing…awful at least. It’s, he said it was a coat and…I think his tags, maybe.”_

Stevie’s breath _whooshed_ from her lungs before she thought to point the phone away from her mouth. “_That’s-_“

_“Yeah,” _Tony agreed quietly. _“But I thought you’d probably both like your stuff back, so I’m having it sent to the compound, should be there in an hour or so and I’ll be back before it gets to you.”_

Stevie nodded absently and then realized Tony wouldn’t be able to see her nodding. “Okay, Tony. I-_thank you_ for…for letting us know. I think Bucky would be, well he’d-“

_“I know, Stevie. It’ll be there in an hour and you guys can open up your stuff and reminisce with the rest of us. I’ve ordered dinner for the Team and we’ll be crashing your apartment around 5:30 because Jarvis says you made cookies.”_

Stevie spluttered a laugh, stepping back and looking over at the countertop with about a dozen cookies cooling. “Yeah, okay,” She agreed easily and there was a smile in Tony’s voice.

_“Great, then I’ll get Peter to dig out the projector so we can watch you in all your USO glory-“_

“_No, _Tony, _please,_” She pleaded, already shaking her head.

She found herself glancing to the door when Bucky stepped into the apartment, fresh back from a workout and she smiled at him in exasperation, gesturing to the phone and mouthing, _Tony._ The brunet grinned and then seemed to scent the air and was immediately making a beeline for the cooling cookies.

_“Don’t you ruin my fun, Stevie. I’m bringing you a present, the least you could do would be let me watch you parade around on stage with the chorus girls-“_

Stevie groaned and Bucky raised a brow curiously, stalled in his mission to investigate the cookies. Stevie just rolled her eyes and gave Bucky a flat look as if to say, _Tony’s driving me crazy, didn’t you know?_

Bucky did know. He smirked and Stevie couldn’t suppress a smile as she tried to get off the line with him. “We’ll see, Tony. I may not save you any cookies if you’re going to-“

_“Oh no you don’t, don’t you dare withhold them from me, Stevie-_“

She laughed and shook her head, crouching down in front of the oven door to take a peek at the cookies therein. “Uh huh, I’ll see you at 5:30, Tony.”

_“Don’t you be smart with me, Stevie…but I’ll see you at 5:30,” _He agreed and Stevie smirked, standing back up and saying her goodbye to the genius, before she swatted Bucky’s hand away from the cooling cookies with a glare as she hung up the phone.

“_Ow_,” Bucky feigned hurt and she rolled her eyes.

“They’re hot, give them a minute to cool why don’t you,” She warned and Bucky grinned and reached out with his metal hand this time.

Stevie gave him a _very _unimpressed look and Bucky snickered, grinning in victory as Stevie finally cracked a smile. Of course he was huffing and wincing when in the next moment he took a bite and burned his tongue and now Stevie was the one grinning that smug little smile.

Bucky rolled his eyes, setting the cookie down to cool a little more. “What was Tony on about?”

Stevie’s smile softened a little and she leaned back against the counter to look at her friend properly. “He found some of our belongings in storage…from before.”

“Oh,” Bucky said simply, blinking a little in confusion. “But I thought-“

“I know,” She agreed, shrugging a little. “Apparently Peggy and…and Howard had a trunk filled with my stuff. I’m not really sure what’s in it, neither is Tony. Well, except for film reels.”

“Film reels?” Bucky questioned, brows drawing together in confusion.

Stevie hummed, her cheeks heating a little. “From my days as a show monkey,” She explained and Bucky blinked stupidly for a moment before realization seemed to dawn on him.

“Oh _man,_ you as a _chorus girl?_” And damn it, he sounded way too excited.

Stevie rolled her eyes and nodded. “But it doesn’t matter, because we’re not watching them,” She told him sternly, turning to put on oven mitts to pull out the next batch of cookies.

Bucky was grinning behind her, watching as she pulled out another tray and busied herself with placing them onto the various cooling racks she’d set out. “Oh yeah we are,” He countered and she groaned.

“Don’t you start too,” She warned, but Bucky was grinning something awful and she really was helpless against this man.

“_Anyway,_” She tried to distract. “He also spoke to Fury and-and apparently Pierce-“

Bucky flinched at the name and Stevie’s gaze softened and she hesitantly took a step towards him. Bucky collected himself quickly, however, and was doing his best to feign nonchalance as Stevie went on.

“He had some things of yours at his home. They were put into evidence storage, but Tony managed to get a hold of them as well. They’re being delivered with the trunk in an hour or so,” She explained gently.

Bucky shrugged a little stiltedly and Stevie couldn’t help but notice how the metal arm whirred softly in the quiet. “Alright.”

Stevie frowned and stepped into the man’s space, Bucky’s gaze instantly settling on her. She gave him a tentative smile and ducked her head a bit to make sure she had his attention. “We’ll open them together, okay? The Team’s coming over for dinner, Tony ordered and we’re going to sit and eat and reminisce and-oh I don’t know-maybe-_maybe,_ like a big ass maybe, we can watch a reel or two-“

“Yes, please,” Bucky breathed and Stevie smiled reluctantly, already rolling her eyes.

“Uh huh, here, now help me with these. I have three more batches to put in if I’m going to feed everyone, Thor, Peter and Sam are coming too and-and I think I need to make more batter,” She admitted and Bucky gave her a lopsided smile before he picked up the bowl of cookie dough and as he went to start scooping out more of the dough to place on a cookie sheet, he leaned in and pressed a smacking kiss to her cheek, ignoring her disgusted squeak.

“You’re the best,” He agreed and Stevie wiped at her cheek in fond annoyance, a stupid dorky _smitten_ smile plastered on her pretty face.

“Damn right,” She muttered and Bucky grinned into the bowl of cookie dough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come chat with me on Discord! starbucksjunkie#9171
> 
> Don't have Discord? Come talk to me on Tumblr! [ko-fiandfanfiction](www.tumblr.com/blog/layora88)


	20. Chapter 20

Tony arrived forty-five minutes later…and so did the rest of the Team and it wasn’t long before Jarvis was informing them of the food’s arrival as well as the delivery he’d requested. Stevie and Bucky had been quietly pulling plates down and the like and couldn’t help but glance nervously at one another before going about their business.

Tony had quietly told Natasha, Clint and the others what was on its way and although curious, they were more concerned about what the contents of the boxes would prompt in an emotional sense with both Stevie and Bucky. Tony was too, hence ordering food and sending out a Team Alert, under the guise of watching Stevie’s USO reels, of course. Peter had dutifully hunted down the projector and was perhaps as eager as Tony and Bucky in seeing Stevie parading around on stage.

“Alright, come help me unpack the takeout,” Stevie called and the group huddled around the kitchen table where they’d laid everything out.

They busied themselves serving up their plates buffet-style and then headed to sit on the various available surfaces scattered about the living room. When Tony went to sit down in the wingback, his chair, he found himself hesitating. But when he went to turn to perhaps go sit elsewhere, Stevie was giving him a gentle smile and nodded her head back towards his chair.

Tony sat down in it.

There was no further discussion of the boxes, even if they sat not so inconspicuously next to the coffee table, the projector set up on it. Everyone busied themselves with idle chatter, talking about their day and enjoying the takeout. Tony had ordered Italian and everyone was more than happy to eat their weight in pasta, salad and far too much garlic bread.

After watching Bucky push his longer hair back behind his ears after the fourth time while he ate, Peter cleared his throat, drawing the man’s attention. “I noticed you uh, well your hair gets in the way a lot. Do you not like buns?”

Bucky blinked, confused for half a second because he was an ass man. But Peter had said something about his hair and-“Oh,” Bucky chuckled, shaking his head a bit. “Uh, it’s not that I don’t like them, I just…well I’ve never used an elastic on my hair before. Guess it is getting pretty long.”

Peter smiled eagerly at him. “I bet you’d suit a bun, though a ponytail might be a bit much.”

Bucky laughed softly, already shaking his head. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“Here,” Stevie interjected, extending her leg to push the basket on the bottom shelf of the coffee table towards him. “There should be a few hair ties in there.”

Bucky huffed, smiling despite himself and then Peter was pulling out the small basket and rifling through its contents. Bucky couldn’t help letting his eyes wander over the various items in the basket. It was filled with hand lotions, body lotions, foot creams, a hair brush and comb and sure enough, hair ties. And yet, all he could think about was the night she’d come in here and he’d-he’d spied on her. He inwardly grimaced.

“Ooh,” Natasha murmured, reaching for a bottle of hand lotion. “I love this company, didn’t know you used this kind of thing,” She admitted, casting Stevie a look as she poured some of the lotion on the back of her hand.

Stevie chuckled softly and shrugged. “I like to take care of myself, I guess. Even if the serum keeps my skin soft.”

Natasha merely hummed and put the bottle back into the basket while Peter busied himself finding the perfect black hair tie. It was thin and simple and not too big, seeing as he didn’t have a lot of hair. Not like Stevie, of course.

“Do you want me to help you?” Peter scrunched his face up as he said it, brandishing the hair tie at Bucky. “Though maybe I wouldn’t be the best choice.”

Bucky laughed and Peter grinned, gesturing to Stevie. “You want to help him?”

Stevie paused, having finished her pasta, she suddenly looked nervous without anything in her hands. Bucky was looking at her with a tentatively hopeful expression on his handsome face and Stevie instantly felt herself relax, giving him a smile.

“Of course, Buck, just a minute though,” She told him, getting up to put her plate away and wash her hands at the sink.

By the time she came back over, hands freshly washed, Bucky had set his own plate aside and was looking to her with a glint of eagerness in his eyes. Stevie tentatively took the hair tie Peter had given to Bucky from the man’s metal fingertips and blushed lightly at the contact.

“Just um, just look forwards for me. I won’t use a brush, it already looks pretty neat,” She told him, watching as Bucky turned his head forward and then she moved to stand behind the couch so that she could reach him properly.

She slipped the hair tie onto her wrist and then gently carded her fingers through his dark hair, smoothing the strands back carefully. Bucky exhaled in a small puff at the first touch and Stevie found her heart beating faster as she let herself comb mindful fingers through his hair.

It was just so soft and even from here above him she could smell the shampoo he used, something with a hint of sandalwood that made her knees a tad weak whenever she caught the scent. She exhaled slowly as she let some of the strands fall through her fingertips, gently gathering them back up again, fingernails gently scratching at the base of his neck.

She wholeheartedly tried to ignore the way he shivered lightly beneath her hand at that and immediately focused to put the hair tie in place, slipping the length of his hair swiftly through it and twisting it so that the short loose ends were left resting at the back of his neck.

“There,” She said, voice gentle as she pulled her hands back, having no real excuse to continue touching him any more.

Bucky was smiling warmly when he turned to look over his shoulder at her and Stevie’s heart felt as if it stuttered behind her ribs. “Thanks,” He murmured, eyes crinkled with the force of his smile and Stevie found herself nodding and shrugging lightly in response.

“No problem, Buck. It-it suits you,” She told him, trying and failing to stifle the blush she could feel coming on.

“Yeah?” Bucky asked and now there was a smirk tugging at the edges of his smart mouth. “How do I look?”

Stevie didn’t bother to resist the urge to roll her eyes and she shoved his good shoulder lightly. “You haven’t changed a bit,” She scoffed. “Always fishin’ for compliments,” She chastened and Bucky’s smirk turned into a full on grin as she swept back around the sofa and started gathering up all the empty plates, Sam and Peter rising to help her.

A few had watched and listened to their exchange and though some were attempting to stifle their amused smiles and knowing glances, most weren’t even trying to do so. Much too amused with the pair to bother.

“It does suit you,” Tony was saying quietly as he stood to pick up the box Fury had procured. “You look like a-what do the kids call it?” He directed at Peter.

Peter, who grinned like the adorable dork he was and his bright dark eyes rounded in adoration at Bucky. “A hipster?”

Tony grinned and nodding, he turned eagerly with his parcel in hand as he stepped up to Bucky on the sofa. “Got it in one.”

Bucky huffed, amused despite himself and let Tony put the box in his lap. “I don’t know what that means, but something tells me I should be offended.”

Tony barked out a surprised laugh and winked at the man. “Depends on who you ask,” He admitted, still smiling as he went back to the wingback to take up his seat once again.

Bucky chuckled softly, still shaking his head when the others returned to their seats and Tony motioned towards the big silver coloured trunk he’d pushed closer to Stevie’s seat beneath the television.

She glanced first to Tony and then to Bucky, only to find that Bucky was already looking at her and was smiling a touch nervously. “I do think you look swell,” She offered, cracking an even bigger smile when it got the desired reaction, the group laughing and Tony sputtering, grinning along with the rest of them.

Bucky huffed in amusement, ducking his head and then realized that the gesture didn’t have his hair falling about his face to hide his tentative smile. Huh, so a downside then. At least he wasn’t blushing.

“Guess we should uh...open these, see what all the fuss is about,” Bucky found himself saying, distracting, even if it wasn’t a great one.

Stevie hummed, shifting in her place on the sofa beneath the television as she eyed the silver coloured trunk in front of her. “Why don’t you go first, Buck?” She suggested, frowning at her own cowardice.

It wasn’t like there was anything that was going to jump out a bite her in there. She didn’t understand why she was so nervous about this whole thing.

That was a lie. She knew exactly why she was so nervous.

She was nervous, because she had no idea what could possibly be inside the box; other than the USO reels, of course. Were these things from her apartment? Were they things from her tent back at base? Were they things she’d had on her and left with the Howelies?

The questions terrified her. She knew she didn’t have much in the way of belongings back then, but what she did have was private and sacred and she frowned, mulling that over. She wasn’t sure she was going to find anything incriminating per-say, but she also wasn’t sure she wasn’t, well, not.

“S-“ Bucky stopped himself, his voice having grown hoarse, so he cleared his throat and tried again. “Sure, not like it’s going to be...” He thought the best thing to do in this scenario would be to rip it off like a bandaid.

Except, not ripping it and instead just opening up the box swiftly. The only problem? He’d not expected to find anything really earth shattering inside. Needless to say, he’d been wrong in that regard.

“Anything important,” He trailed off, voice barely even above a whisper as his gaze focused on the contents of the box.

The entire room had fallen silent, still as Bucky looked inside. It only took him a moment to somewhat collect himself and then he was reaching into said box and carefully pulling out the sealed clear bag, encasing his navy blue uniform jacket. He exhaled shakily and before he’d registered the will to do so, he had a knife in hand-that Tony faintly asked, where did that even come from?-and was cutting through the plastic barrier.

He pulled the jacket out of it and was left staring in shock at the garment. It was torn, slashes and tears throughout, loose threads and missing buttons. It also happened to be stained to hell and back, nearly black from only God knows what in more spots than he could count. Not to mention the sleeve of its left arm was completely gone, only split threads left in its wake.

He didn’t manage to entirely repress a shudder at the sight of the stains on the shoulder area and tramped down the sudden bile rising in his throat. He must have made some kind of noise or done something to warrant Stevie suddenly being by his side, however, now sitting on the sofa and a careful arm wrapped around both of his shoulders.

Bucky didn’t repress a shudder at the contact and instead leaned hard into her solidity. She squeezed him and gently placed one of her careful hands over his shaking flesh and blood. “It’s alright, Buck,” She murmured, her voice soft, consoling and sweet.

Bucky blinked and tried to ignore the wetness he could feel against his cheeks. “I’m alright,” He found himself insisting, despite the hoarseness of his voice and the turbulence in his heart.

Stevie didn’t say anything to that and simply held him, watching then as he pushed open the lapels of the jacket…and his dog tags emerged. Stevie’s breathing hitched at the sight of them, dirtied, the metal nearly black with age. But they were there. She watched as Bucky picked them up, the chain dangling as he rubbed his warm thumb against the cool metal, smearing the grime around and attempting to uncover the words, the numbers.

He was shaking as he did so and Stevie calmly moved her hand to fold over his, making him close his fingers around the metal tags, effectively stilling him. “We’ll clean them up later, Buck,” She murmured.

He nodded shakily and Stevie withdrew, though she didn’t stop holding him. It took him a minute to move on past the tags and then he found himself opening up the jacket further and Stevie watched in confusion as he seemed to search with careful fingers along the inseam of the jacket on the right side. She was baffled as Bucky apparently found what he’d been looking for and in the next moment, he had his knife back in hand and he was cutting open…a small hidden pocket sewn into the lining.

“What-“ She started to ask, but the words stalled in her chest as he pulled out a small piece of paper.

Bucky was shaking as he pulled it free and she thought he would unfold it at least, but in the next moment he was getting up hastily from his seat. Stevie’s arm fell from his shoulders and he looked to her apologetically as the box he’d had on his lap fell, the coat and plastic falling to the wayside. Stevie had caught it of course, was holding the jacket now in her own lap with careful fingers curled around the ancient fabric.

Bucky’s heart positively ached at the sight of her bright blue eyes wide and searching as she looked up at him worriedly from her spot on the sofa. “I just-I need a minute,” He explained and Stevie nodded.

“Of course, Bucky,” She murmured and Bucky exhaled roughly and in the next instant, was gone.

Stevie sunk back against the cushions and there was a collectively heavy exhale around her. “Well,” Tony sighed. “That went well.”

Stevie cast him a slightly withering look, but he could forgive her for it this time. Her gaze strayed towards the coat in her hands and she frowned, letting her gaze flicker over the ruined fabric. She couldn’t bear to look at it anymore and quietly slipped it back into the plastic, tucking it inside the box and closing the lid. It was hastily done and when Natasha calmly took the box from her and put it out of sight, Stevie finally let herself breathe a little deeper.

The smell of the thing finally disappearing from her nostrils.

.

Bucky had fled to his bedroom. He just needed a minute to himself, is all. He exhaled shakily as he sat down heavily on the edge of the bed and took another couple of shaky breaths in an attempt to ground himself. He couldn’t believe it. Couldn’t believe that after all these years, his tags had made it through. Though the piece of paper held carefully in his grasp was far more startling in his eyes.

He’d asked for a special pocket to be sewn into his coat when it was being made and it’d held up. Waterproof and air-tight and it’d worked like a charm. Hydra hadn’t found it, hadn’t destroyed it, hadn’t even touched it with their dirty hands. He was still shaking as he carefully unfolded the yellowed paper and couldn’t manage to stop himself as his gaze fell upon the paper and the portrait therein.

The portrait Stevie had drawn for him so long ago.

He looked at it now the same way he had then, feeling grateful and blessed and so much damn love in his heart that he could hardly breathe with it. Stevie looked so beautiful in the drawing, so sweet and kind and despite it being done in charcoal, he felt her eyes positively sparkled. He could see the love she had for him reflected in those eyes staring back at him and for a while, he wondered if she would ever look at him that way again. Like she could see straight into his heart, his soul.

That was a lie though, wasn’t it? Stevie always looked at him this way, the only difference now? Now, she hid a part of herself away from him, afraid he’d see it, most likely. But he knew it was there, could see it and feel it in every possible thing she did for him. She’d never stopped loving him, he was sure of it. But…

There was a big ‘but’ there now wasn’t there?

She loved Tony too. Maybe she only loved Bucky now as her best friend…but that didn’t quite feel right either. Tony had said…he’d said a lot of things. Bucky didn’t always believe everything he had to say, but he had believed him that day in the workshop. But Bucky also knew what he’d seen in the man’s eyes looking back at him and it reminded him a lot of the way Stevie’s eyes appeared in the portrait and just about every minute of every day when she had her attention focused on Bucky…on Tony.

He wasn’t stupid. He was pretty sure she loved them both and…Bucky didn’t know what to do with the idea in the least. Not yet, anyway.

He sighed deeply and laid the picture carefully on his bedside table. He rose from his seat and paused for a moment, gaze still caught on the portrait. “Hey, Jarvis?” He called softly.

“Yes, Sergeant Barnes?”

Bucky shifted where he stood, thumb gently brushing over the dirtied metal of his dog tags still cradled in his grasp. “Do you think-could I-“ He cleared his throat slightly. “I need a picture frame…about 5”4”.”

“Would you like me to order one for you, Sir?”

Bucky exhaled slowly and nodded. “Could you? Just something-a wood frame, nothing fancy.”

“Of course, Sir. It should arrive by tomorrow afternoon.”

“Thank you, Jarvis,” Bucky murmured and then made his way to the bathroom to clean up his tags.

.

When Bucky finally emerged from the safety of his bedroom, the living room wasn’t the quiet reserved space he’d left behind. The group was laughing and joking, smiling with one another…and it took Bucky a moment to realize that it was because they’d managed to get Stevie to give up her USO reels.

Bucky didn’t spare the screen a glance yet, however, his gaze flitting over Stevie where she was sitting there practically sulking as she looked towards the projection on the wall, an unpleasant twist to her lips.

Bucky also couldn’t help but notice that the trunk was open in front of her and she was sitting back on her heels beside the wingback where Tony sat, his dark eyes fixed on the projection. He couldn’t help the soft smile that stole across his face when she caught sight of him stepping back into the room, however, and if her eyes slipped down to where he was sure his tags were only just barely visible beneath his shirt before meeting his gaze once again, well, that was just between them.

“Come sit with me?” She asked and Bucky nodded, already heading over to take up a seat on the floor beside her.

If the contents of her box were anything even remotely close to his, he wanted to be there to support her if she needed it.

“I see they managed to get the reels going,” Bucky teased, glancing towards the wall beside them and found himself twisting a bit too eagerly when he did in fact get a proper look at Stevie on stage in all her USO glory.

“Yeah, well,” She huffed, glancing down at her hands resting atop her thighs.

Bucky hummed under his breath, sharp grey-blue eyes taking in everything he was seeing on film. Stevie in a goddamn skirt, he wasn’t sure he’d ever actually get to see her in the uniform some of the soldiers talked about. He’d never actually seen any of the shows the girls put on for the army, too busy fighting a war and getting captured.

“Wow,” He found himself breathing, watching as Stevie paraded out on stage with the rest of the girls and proceeded to punch Hitler in the face.

The others were howling with laughter at the scene and Bucky shook his head. “Not a word,” Stevie mock threatened and when Bucky turned to look at her, she was glaring at the others before turning her gaze on him. “They promised if I let them watch one reel, they wouldn’t say a word about it.”

Bucky grinned, glancing around curiously at the others and sure enough, they were all forcibly fighting with the urge to say something. Bucky’s gaze turned smug as he looked back to Stevie, who was now watching him with narrowed eyes. “Guess it’s a good thing I wasn’t here to promise anything of the sort,” He announced and was treated to Stevie’s very unimpressed groan and the rest of the group’s chorused yells of triumph.

Bucky smirked and turned to look back at the screen. “Jesus, Stevie…you got legs for days under that skirt.”

Stevie was attempting to smother her embarrassed smile behind her palms and Bucky nudged her lightly with his elbow. “I’m serious, Stevie and really, could they have made your skirt any shorter? You’re flashin’ every guy in the place!”

Stevie groaned, shoving at him in annoyance, but she was still smiling. “Shut up, you’re such a jerk.”

Bucky laughed, shaking his head as he glanced back at the film, his eyes narrowing suddenly. “Did-is your skirt actually shorter than the other girls’?” He asked in disbelief.

“By two inches,” She confirmed and the others practically crowed in delight.

“Why?” Bucky blurted, still grinning despite himself.

“They just…gave me one of the already made ones…and it-” She wrinkled her nose. “My hips-it…didn’t fit right.”

The others positively cackled and Stevie’s cheeks bloomed in such a riotous blush, Bucky wondered if she had any blood left in the rest of her. He was laughing when she smacked his chest him with the back of her hand and then she was picking up a pillow and smacking it against Tony’s shins when she caught sight of the man laughing just as hard.

They both let her and it sort of devolved from there. The group broke their promise less than two-minutes later and Stevie was only half mad at them, the rest of her was just fondly exasperated and definitely all kinds of embarrassed.

Eventually they quieted down as Stevie started sifting carefully through the trunk full of her things. She’d been surprised and touched to learn that Howard and Peggy had a hand in helping to preserve her belongings, but she really hadn’t known what to expect to find. So it was with an even greater shock when she moved a couple of sheafs of paper, fan letters or something that she’d make sure to look at later and caught sight of a very familiar leather envelope.

Her next breath in hitched and Bucky glanced to her curiously, having been distracted by Sam and Clint. It didn’t take more than a cursory glance at her for him to know there was something wrong but he didn’t get to voice his concern fast enough because Stevie was already tentatively removing the item she’d seen from the trunk.

Bucky’s eyes widened as he caught sight of it, a memory blooming behind his eyes and before he could stop it, an involuntary flush had worked its way across his cheeks. Stevie hadn’t noticed, however, and was bringing the leather envelope to her chest and breathing in deeply as she closed her eyes. Bucky couldn’t believe it and he was pretty sure Stevie couldn’t believe it either.

“What’s that?” Peter asked, voice soft, but clearly curious and loud enough for them to hear him.

The others had fallen relatively quiet, glancing over at Stevie with curiosity and worry reflected in their eyes. Bucky didn’t blame them, really.

He reached up with his flesh and blood hand and gently placed it on Stevie’s shoulder, feeling the warmth of her seeping through her t-shirt and melding with his own. She exhaled shakily, lashes fluttering open as her eyes fell to him. Bucky’s lips twitched in a half-smile when she leaned against him. He gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze and then drew his hand away. She didn’t move out of his space.

“It’s a sketchbook I gave to Stevie the night before I shipped out,” Bucky explained, words a little more than emotionally draining.

“Y-you remember, Buck?” She asked hopefully and when Bucky looked back to her bright eyes, now glassy with unshed tears, he found his heart clenching painfully in his chest.

“Yeah, Stevie, a’course I remember,” He murmured, reaching up and pushing some of her curls over her shoulder, gaze falling to the blonde mess of them; he just couldn’t bring himself to face that gaze again right then.

Not when he was pretty sure she wasn’t simply asking him if he remembered giving her the sketchbook.

Stevie exhaled shakily and brought the sketchbook down from where she’d been clutching it to her chest to now rest against her thighs.

“You going to show us what’s in it?” Sam prodded gently.

Stevie shook her head, a brittle smile on her face and flickered her gaze to Bucky before looking back to Sam. “I think I’d like to go through it on my own first.”

They didn’t fight her on it and a few more minutes passed them by in relative quiet. Stevie continued to go through her belongings quietly while the others started chatting and laughed lightly at the dancers in the projection, Stevie included. She didn’t even mind all that much, not if it had her friends laughing and smiling as they were.

While they were distracted with the reels, Stevie delved deeper into the trunk. She’d found a few things, mostly old sketchbooks, some letters from fans at the time too. She hadn’t found much from her apartment, or so she’d thought, until she happened across an eerily familiar parcel. It was wrapped with an old fabric, a piece of twine wound around it to keep it secure and Stevie hesitated from lifting it from the trunk.

It was amazing that everything had held their condition for so many years and she knew it had been in thanks to the trunk it’d all been stored in. It was air tight and kept in storage, safe and dry so it was with additional care on her part as she lifted the parcel from the trunk and set it down on her lap.

With shaky fingers she started to undo the twine, tied in a lopsided bow atop the unassuming fabric that kept its contents a secret. She could hear the others still talking, the sounds of clinking mugs as they made a bit of coffee and brought out desert. But the sounds were secondary to her right that moment as she carefully parted the fabric to reveal the contents within.

When pale blue fabric was revealed to her suddenly bright gaze, she gently pushed more of the cloth aside, her next breath hitching in her chest as she carefully buried her fingers in the blue fabric and lifted it free from its hiding place.

Bucky was calling her name, whispering words to her that she couldn’t hear, could’t focus on. She was shaking terribly as she lifted the fabric to her face and there was no hesitation in her movements as she brought it to her face and inhaled deeply, hoping that some scent-any scent-remained.

She buried her face in the folds of blue and she knew there were tears on her cheeks as she clutched the fabric tighter to her, her breathing shaky and deep, trying so hard to find that lingering scent, that smell. It was lost, however, gone with time, only the slight must of the fabric filling her nose again and again, despite how many breaths she took.

There was a warmth around her suddenly, calm words in her ear, warm breath on her cheek and she swayed into the contact as she let herself sink into the feel of the blue dress now pressed to her breast.

“Oh, Stevie,” Bucky whispered, voice kind and understanding and she let herself give in just that bit more, a sob hitching in her throat.

She felt careful arms moving her, shifting her and then she was curled up against a broad chest and being carried away from soft murmurs and gentle hands. She let herself be carried, knowing that she was safe, safe to cry, safe to let go, safe to grieve.

Bucky had seen her face when she’d pulled the pale blue dress from its wrapping and he knew, just knew that she was going to break down. He couldn’t stop it, couldn’t do anything to prevent the hurt, the heartache she was experiencing. Tony had seen it too, even if he didn’t know, didn’t understand entirely.

He’d gotten to his knees beside Stevie, a careful hand finding its way to her shoulder while Bucky’s had gone to her back. They’d tried to talk to her, draw her back, but she was already lost in her own mind, her own grief. The others were being quiet, but Bucky knew they wanted to help in any way that they could.

Sam suggested taking her to her room to calm down and Bucky had nodded, giving Tony a sympathetic smile as he shifted and went to lift the blonde into his arms. Tony merely gave him a strained smile and squeezed Bucky’s arm while his other hand caressed Stevie’s hair as she curled against Bucky’s chest.

When Bucky got her to her bedroom, he gently set her down on the bed and tried to coerce her to relinquish her death-grip on the fabric, knowing she would be upset with herself if she actually ruined it.

She let him, her quiet hitching breaths still very much present as she let herself be laid down atop the covers. Bucky didn’t take the dress away from her, merely gentled her hold and helped her lay it out on the bed beside her as she shifted onto her side.

“There you go, Stevie,” He murmured softly, gently carding his fingers through her long locks, smoothing the strands away from her face. “Take a deep breath for me, doll. You can let it out, get it all out, baby.”

He knew he shouldn’t be calling her by those sweet names, but he honestly couldn’t stop himself. She looked so worn down, broken open and he didn’t want her to feel alone in this, in her grief. He caressed her cheek gently with his flesh and blood knuckles and laid down carefully behind her on the bed, tucking himself up against her to try and calm her down.

He wasn’t sure she could hear him, let alone if she knew he was even there. But any reassurance, any comfort he could possibly bring her, he’d give it all to her and then some. He held her, metal arm draped over her waist, gently trailing skin-warmed fingertips along her bared forearm, along her bicep, up to brush her cheek.

She wept, near silent tears, soft hitching breaths breaking through the quiet and Bucky tried to soothe her with soft words and a warm embrace, gentle touches and even gentler kisses that were pressed into her hair, her shoulder.

There had been a shadow at the door not long ago, Bucky had heard them approach but couldn’t look over his shoulder at the person. He’d not been able to shut the door when he’d gotten inside, but it didn’t worry him too much. He trusted their friends and seeing as it was Tony at the door, Bucky trusted him too.

Tony had stood in the doorway for a short while and Bucky called out softly to him. “She’ll be alright.”

Tony hadn’t said anything, but the soft sound of his footfalls as he came closer was enough for Bucky to glance up. The brunet was standing there with a contemplative look on his face, his eyes settled firmly on Bucky and Bucky nearly jumped when he felt Tony’s hand curl tentatively over his metal shoulder, his thumb digging in a little firmer against the nape of his neck.

Bucky swallowed thickly and held Tony’s gaze for a long moment, but didn’t say anything more. Tony’s gaze flickered towards Stevie still curled up in his arms with her mother’s dress pressed to her chest and draped over her knee, the rest laid out over the covers. Bucky let him look and when Tony’s gaze settled back on Bucky, he wasn’t sure what to make of the expression on the man’s face.

He didn’t get to ask, however, because barely a moment later, Tony was leaving, asking Jarvis to dim the lights as he closed the door behind him with a quiet snick.

Bucky’s neck tingled with the lingering warmth of Tony’s thumb as it had swept back and forth against his skin. He shivered, goose bumps prickling his skin as he held Stevie a little tighter, her soft breaths finally evening out as she slipped into sleep.

.

Bucky slipped out of bed after a while later, leaving Stevie asleep beneath her blanket, dress still held against her chest. The sounds of the group had filtered out sometime ago and Bucky knew that Tony had urged everyone to tidy up and leave, having heard the group’s soft murmurs and clinking of glasses and plates thereafter.

Bucky felt it was safe to leave Stevie’s side for a moment and disappeared out into the kitchen to get a glass of water. Sure enough, the Team had left and everything had been tidied up. He could see the trunk, now closed and set behind the couch, the box he’d been given no where in sight. He breathed out a soft sigh of relief and noted that they’d left the projector on the coffee table with a couple of reels in their metal cases lying nearby.

He smiled faintly and went into the kitchen. He took his time pouring a couple glasses of water for himself, drinking one after another before he poured another glass for Stevie, intending to bring it to her room and set it on her nightstand. It wasn’t very late, just on 9:30pm but he wouldn’t be surprised if Stevie slept right through until morning. She’d cried herself to sleep and the very thought of it had Bucky’s heart clenching as he made his way back to her bedroom.

He didn’t count on her being awake, however.

He’d let himself in and stilled, because Stevie wasn’t in her bed any more.

“Hey,” She called softly, voice roughened as she slipped her arms through her champagne satin robe.

Bucky floundered for a moment, exhaling shakily at the sight of Stevie in a pink nightie, her robe slowly slipping over her shoulders. She pulled her robe closed in the next moment, hiding the soft pink of her neglige and he swallowed thickly, gaze snapping up to her face. “H-hey,” He greeted, realizing he was still just standing there, he quickly went to her bedside table to set the glass of water down for her. “I didn’t mean to interr-“

“I woke up when you left,” She interrupted him and Bucky exhaled shakily, nodding and wholeheartedly trying not to notice the soft blush working its way over the tops of her cheeks. “Thank you for staying with me.”

Bucky’s gaze flickered back to her face as she took a few steps towards him then. “It wasn’t any trouble,” He murmured, having finished setting the glass down. “Just wanted you to be comfortable. I know you probably weren’t expecting to find what you did.”

Stevie swallowed hard and nodded, casting her gaze over to the reading chair by the window where she’d lain her mother’s dress over the back of it. Bucky’s gaze followed and his heart clenched when she let out a shaky breath.

“Yeah, hadn’t expected that,” She agreed quietly and Bucky turned his attention back to her, only to find her still looking at the pale blue dress.

“I didn’t know you kept it,” He admitted quietly, afraid to voice his thoughts.

Stevie hummed softly, still unable to draw her gaze away. “Couldn’t bring myself to part with it. Was the only thing I kept of hers.”

Bucky exhaled roughly and nodded, turning his head away from her for a moment. He remembered Sarah, even if those memories seemed so far away now. He couldn’t remember what her smile or laughter well, the memories too faded with time, but the feelings he’d had in the woman’s presence were still as fresh as ever.

“You look so much like her, Stevie,” Bucky found himself whispering, knowing it was somehow true.

Stevie turned to look at him and she swallowed hard. “S-sometimes I think I see it, the resemblance, I mean. But it was so long ago, maybe I’ve truly forgotten,” She shook her head sadly. “Right after the whole-“ She gestured to her body. “Every time I looked in a mirror I thought my ma was staring back at me. I remember feeling like that was true.”

She exhaled shakily. “Think I’ve changed a bit though,” She admitted, walking towards where she’d left the door to her closet open.

Bucky could see a mirror hanging on the back of the door as she pushed it open further, stepping in front of it. He watched as she shifted, eyes firmly fixed on her reflection as she pulled a few of her curls from where they’d been caught beneath her robe and let out a shaky breath.

“I don’t see my ma in me so much anymore,” She sighed. “I’ve seen things she couldn’t ever begin to dream of and I think it shows.”

She reached up to trail a finger lightly down the length of her nose, over the little spot that never quite healed right. She smiled tiredly and let her gaze flicker up to her hair. “I’m glad my hair still looks like hers.”

“You still have her eyes, Stevie. I know you struggled with colours back then, but I can promise you, you still have her eyes,” Bucky told her gently.

He knew it to be true. He remembered Sarah’s kindness, her love for her daughter, her love for Bucky and his family. She was a wonderful woman, someone who helped people heal and feel like themselves again. Stevie was just like her.

Stevie inhaled shakily and when she turned to look at him, there were tears brimming in those beautiful blue depths. “I do?”

Bucky smiled, so earnest and pure and Stevie’s eyes welled even more. “Yeah, Stevie, you do.”

Stevie wiped ineffectually at the tears that fell to her cheeks and Bucky took a step towards her. “C’mere, Stevie,” He murmured, opening his arms to his friend.

She didn’t hesitate to step into the comfort of his embrace and Bucky breathed out slowly as she wrapped her arms around his middle, her hands grasping lightly at his back. He let her tuck her face against his neck and shoulder, grateful she’d turned to his right to do so. Her shoulders shook slightly as she breathed out shakily, more tears surely escaping.

But she’d done her crying, she just needed to breathe for a moment, collect herself maybe. Bucky let her and after only a couple of minutes she was relaxing her grip on him while he continued to rub soothing circles against her back while his flesh and blood hand gently caressed her hair.

“Don’t say you’re sorry,” He murmured when he felt her inhaling a little deeper preparing herself to speak.

She huffed softly and he didn’t bother to hide his smile as she pulled back, their arms falling from one another to rest at their sides. “Fine, I’ll say thank you then.”

Bucky chuckled softly and reached up to push some of her curls back over her shoulder, Stevie’s lashes fluttering as she turned her gaze up slightly to him. “You should get some sleep,” He breathed. “Think the Team’s coming by for breakfast to cheer us both up.”

Stevie huffed softly and nodded, casting her gaze off to the side and of course landing on her mother’s dress. She exhaled shakily. “Think I might stay up and draw for a while. D-do you want to sit and read with me for a little? Don’t think I can fall asleep just yet.”

Bucky’s gaze softened and he nodded. “That sounds nice, Stevie, I’ll go get changed and grab my book.”

Stevie let him go and when he came back, she was settled in bed, properly under the covers this time. She wasn’t wearing her robe anymore. He tried not to be distracted by her bared shoulders, nor the fact that she was in the prettiest pink neglige he was sure he’d ever seen. It was simple, not at all revealing, but the mere fact that it was Stevie, well…it was proving to be a little much.

He exhaled shakily from the doorway, the latest book she’d brought him from the library clutched weakly in his hands. But Stevie just smiled and patted the bed beside her and Bucky was helpless not to make his way over.

He climbed into bed and despite wearing a pair of grey sleep pants and a comfortably worn white t-shirt, he felt naked under her gaze. She’d asked Jarvis to bring up the lights a bit more and once they were both settled sitting up against the headboard, pillows behind them as they made themselves comfortable, Bucky found himself relaxing a bit more.

They didn’t talk to one another, both soon lost in their own devices. Stevie drawing and Bucky…pretending to read his book. To be fair, he’d never been in Stevie’s room before so he was going to blame his distraction on that.

It had more to do with the woman herself who was sketching quietly beside him, sheets pooled at her waist and sketchbook settled in her lap. He watched her hand for a short while, following the lines she sketched at first and then the length of her fingertips as they curled around the pencil in her grasp.

He finally managed to let his gaze drift to something discernibly not going to somehow arouse him and focused on what she was drawing instead. His gaze softened and he lowered the book he’d been holding to his lap.

“That’s beautiful, Stevie,” He murmured and she smiled, casting a quick glance to him.

“Thank you,” She sighed, taking a moment to look over the sketch.

It wasn’t finished by any means, but even what she’d done so far, she liked. She’d started sketching her mother in movement, wearing her favourite dress and she liked to imagine her dancing with her husband. She would sketch a figure in his place, but there would be no discernible features for him. Not for the first time did Stevie wish she could have known her father.

Bucky fell quiet again as she continued to sketch, smudging lightly with her fingers now and again. She’d be covered in pencil before long and it only made Bucky smile, recalling all the days they’d sat together, Stevie drawing and he reading or simply pestering her to play a game with him. He turned his gaze away and found himself looking at the dress where she’d left it draped carefully over the back of the reading chair.

It was true that he’d never been in her room really before. Earlier he’d been preoccupied so he hadn’t gotten the chance to exactly look around. Now, though? He let his gaze wander the space, noting the two large bookshelves that dominated either side of the door that surely led to her ensuite bathroom. The shelves were filled with books and knickknacks. There were pictures and even sketches in frames too. Her shield was propped up against the desk not far from the door.

The desk was made of dark wood that matched the bookshelves. It was a simple design with a desktop computer, a StarkPad and a few pens and pencils in a holder sitting atop it. Her black leather chair was tucked in and from here he could see her favourite green sweatshirt draped over one of the armrests.

His gaze flickered elsewhere not long after and settled on the door to her closet. She’d left it open and in the dim light of the bedroom, he could see that the closet was much larger than he originally thought, definitely a walk in. He could only see what the mirror showed him as it was left partially closed, but it was enough. To see the fabrics and colours therein had him forcing his heart rate to remain steady, his breathing to remain even.

There was so much lace and satin, the fabric shiny and in so many different colours. He let his gaze follow one of her robes, a red one-Iron Man red if he were being entirely honest with himself-as it trailed close to the floor. That’s when he caught sight of the shoes placed beneath the line of clothing on a raised shelf to keep them off the floor.

They were heels. Like, fancy ones.

He inhaled deeply and pretended to sigh as he looked back at the pages of his book, hoping he didn’t sound nearly as shaky as he felt. The thought of her in heels, in those…those garments. It was enough to call back the images of that night.

He’d seen her in that lingerie, he’d seen her in something that probably wasn’t meant for him to see. Even now, sitting up beside him in her own damn bed, she was wearing something he somehow thought wasn’t meant for him. He wasn’t exactly sure who it was meant for though. Maybe only herself?

A phrase came back to him suddenly then, something Peter had had to explain to him. TLC, tender loving care. That would explain the lingerie, maybe. His brows furrowed in thought and he let himself wonder in contemplative silence for a while longer. He was drawn from his thoughts a few minutes later when Stevie made a curious sound beside him.

“You look like you’re ready to throw that book against the wall, Buck,” She teased and Bucky barked out a surprised laugh, startling them both at the volume.

Stevie’s smile was slow to spread, but she was still smiling at him. Bucky apologized softly and shook his head, closing the book and shaking it a bit. “Sorry, was thinking too hard, I think.”

Stevie huffed an amused chuckle and Bucky grinned wryly at her, gently rubbing at his brow and letting out a sigh. “I think I’m going to head to bed, sorry, Stevie.”

“It’s okay,” She murmured, gaze following him as he slipped out from beneath the covers, book in hand. “Thank you for staying with me.”

Bucky shook his head, smiling softly as he went towards the door. “Was no skin off my nose, doll. Get some rest, I’ll see you in the morning.”

Stevie’s cheeks were flushed when he looked back at her, hand already curled around the door handle. He was helpless not to smile in response.

“Night, Bucky,” She breathed and Bucky nodded, trying and failing not to let his gaze linger on her frame, the way her breasts lifted with each breath beneath that sweet pink, the cream coloured scalloping there. The way her nipples showed...just a tiny bit beneath the satin of her neglige.

He exhaled shakily and tried to keep his breathing steady as he let himself out. “Night, Stevie.”


	21. Chapter 21

“Hey, Buck,” Stevie greeted softly, leaning on the doorframe to Bucky’s bathroom, watching him attempt to put an elastic in his hair at the mirror above the sink.

At least he was dressed. The brunet’s gaze shifted to the doorway, meeting Stevie’s bright blue eyes in the mirror’s reflection while he continued to try and put his hair up into some semblance of a bun. Stevie’s smile was pleased and all sorts of fond as she let him turn his attention back to his task with a quiet, “Hey, Stevie. What’s up?”

“I was just wondering if you wanted to grab a bite to eat with me? I was thinking of heading over to that coffee shop in the SI atrium of the compound. They have some good sandwiches I think you’d like.”

Bucky stilled, gaze fixed on hers once again in the mirror’s reflection. “Am I allowed to go there?”

Stevie’s smile was more of a smirk as she stepped further into the bathroom and gently took the hair tie from Bucky’s flesh and blood fingers. Bucky let her, smiling softly to himself as she started carding her fingers through his hair once again, tugging the strands lightly into a pony tail. “You think anyone’s going to stop Captain America and his friend from getting _coffee_, Buck?” She teased, effortlessly twisting his hair into a small neat bun.

Bucky exhaled shakily as she pulled her hands from their task and rest them on his shoulders instead. “Probably not, no.”

Stevie chuckled softly and gave his shoulders a gentle pat as she turned to leave. “Besides, they’ve all signed non disclosure agreements, I think we’re safe,” She admitted, walking through to Bucky’s bedroom.

Bucky huffed, clearly amused and gave himself another minute to admire the bun and how it made him look. He was blushing he realized, checking himself out in the bathroom mirror. It felt familiar somehow though, as he licked his thumb and smoothed down a flyaway at his temple and he couldn’t help smiling even more when he recalled standing in front of a tiny mirror in the bathroom he’d shared with his sisters and ma, the girls and him fighting for time in front of the damn thing.

It was a happy memory, even if it was also sad. He didn’t remember the girls very much anymore, but he remembered his ma and the feelings he carried with him for his sisters, his family. He wasn’t sure he could ever forget the love he had for those girls. He sighed softly and eventually pulled himself from the mirror, knowing he’d at least have to put on a hoodie and keep his hand in his pocket when they went for lunch.

When he stepped into his room, however, Stevie was standing quietly by the windows looking out over the grounds, taking in the sunshine, the grassy yard and the pond not two hundred yards out. She was still, her breathing even, heart rate steady.

Too steady.

When he took another step towards her, she smiled brightly over her shoulder at him but her eyes were a little glassy. He didn’t get a chance to say anything about it, though, as she turned and headed for the door. “Come on, Buck. I’m starving. I’ll even get you one of those sweet iced coffees you like so much.”

Bucky’s gaze followed Stevie’s path past the bed and Bucky’s eyes tracked back when he caught sight of something that didn’t quite look right. He swallowed thickly when he noticed the picture frame with Stevie’s portrait was shifted just a smidge from how he’d set it up earlier that morning. He inhaled shakily and quickly looked away from the picture to settle on Stevie’s retreating back, gaze falling helpless to the way her curls swung against her back, her impossibly tiny waist. She stopped at Bucky’s desk and picked up the grey hoodie there, smiling down at it as she trailed her hands along the fabric.

“You might want to wear this though, it’s a little cool out, despite the sunshine,” She admitted and Bucky could only nod when she glanced up from the sweater to look at him.

“Always lookin’ out for me,” He sighed and Stevie’s eyes crinkled with the force of her forever fond smile.

“Of course, Buck.”

Bucky forced himself to smile, even if there was a horde of angry butterflies attempting to escape his chest. He hoped she appreciated the effort it took and as he stepped up to take the sweater from her. She didn’t leave the doorway right away and they ended up standing quite close to one another for a moment or three too long.

“I’ll just grab my sweater too,” She eventually breathed and Bucky nodded as she turned and headed across the hall to her own room, Bucky moving to lean against the doorframe of her bedroom, his sweater now in hand.

Bucky let his gaze flicker around the space just as he had last night and his gaze settled back to where Stevie had left her mother’s dress lying draped over the reading chair. “What do you think you’ll do with her dress?” He found himself asking.

Stevie shrugged lightly, picking up her sweater and slipping her arms through it. “I’m not sure. It won’t fit me now,” She sighed. “I could keep it, but I don’t know...it’s still sort of painful to have it here in-“ She frowned. “In a time where she could never have been.”

“Stevie,” Bucky sighed, but the blonde merely smiled kindly at him and shrugged.

“I’m fine, Buck. It’s just hard to think about sometimes,” She admitted quietly, zipping up her sweater.

“I know, I really do,” He consoled, listening to her shaky breath.

She nodded and Bucky bit his lip, thinking for a moment. “What-what if-“ Bucky started and then had to shake his head, unsure of himself.

“What if, what?” Stevie prodded, head tilted curiously as she regarded him.

Bucky let his gaze flicker back to the dress. “Would you let me have it?”

Stevie blinked, confused. “Why would you want it?”

Bucky brought his gaze back to her and he smiled, his heart giving a little lurch. “I have an idea,” Stevie’s brows only raised in question. “Do you trust me?”

Stevie’s entire demeanour changed. “Of _course_ I trust you, Bucky. What a stupid question,” She sighed in annoyance.

Bucky exhaled sharply through his nose, smiling a little bashfully. Just as it would have been a stupid question if she’d asked _him _the very same thing. “Okay, then I’ll ask you again. Can I have it?”

Stevie only paused for a moment to think about it. She didn’t know _why_ Bucky wanted it exactly but she knew she couldn’t hold onto it much longer. It was too hard to look at. She’d drawn three portraits of her mother that night, and in all of them she’d been wearing that dress.

It was a simple thing, a pale blue. It wasn’t silk or satin or anything even remotely fancy. It was something Sarah had worn around their home when she cooked dinner or when they went to the store together. It had been comfortable and one of her mum’s favourite colours, she’d once told her. Stevie loved it. She remembered trying it on after her mother had passed, she’d cried while wearing it. It’d been too big on her then, she didn’t fill it out like her mother had and now, now she knew she was far too big for it.

She exhaled shakily and nodded. It wasn’t any good to keep it, even if it was sentimental. If Bucky had an idea for it and wanted it, she trusted him to do what was best with the garment. “Yeah, Buck. You can have it.”

Bucky smiled kindly at her, his gaze softening. “Thank you, Stevie. I promise I’ll look after it.”

Stevie nodded, her soft smile turning a little watery. “I know.”

After that, they’d headed out together for lunch and when they had gotten back to the apartment, she had quietly brought the dress into Bucky’s room and left it in his care. Afterwards, Bucky had gone down to the workshop while Stevie had disappeared off to the gym with plans to meet up with Sam.

.

“What’s up, buttercup? You wanted to talk to me without Stevie around, so I imagine this should be good.”

Bucky huffed but didn’t deny it as he made himself comfortable on one of the rolling stools in the workshop, doors firmly shut behind them. “I need your help,” He said simply, pulling his phone from his pocket and thumbing through his photos.

Tony raised a brow at him but didn’t say anything else for the moment as Bucky found what he’d been looking for and turned the screen to show him. “Oh,” Tony said simply and Bucky bit his lower lip nervously.

“This was Stevie’s mother’s dress,” Bucky told him quietly, he’d taken a few photos of it after Stevie had left it with him. “The dress you saw her with yesterday.”

Tony nodded, brows pinched up in concern and took the phone from him, carefully holding it as he let himself look at the gown. He raised a brow in question as he handed it back, however. “Okay, that explains a lot.”

Bucky blew out a breath. “Yeah, uh…I was wonderin’ if you knew anyone you could put me in touch with that makes clothes, dresses too? I’d like to have most of the fabric reused to make a-a pyjama set, I guess. But, nicer,” He shrugged, looking down at his hands after pocketing the phone. “And I’d also really like to have a dress made for her in memory of her mother with this one in mind. The dress you saw, it-it won’t fit Stevie and I know it’s a bit dated and I thought it would be a nice gift for her. She mentioned a Charity Gala coming up and-“ He sighed, feeling self-conscious about his request. “I just thought it might be nice.”

Tony was staring at him Bucky soon realized. Like, _really _staring at him. “The Maria Stark Foundation’s Charity Gala is a week from Friday. Pepper and I have been organizing it, well, _she’s _been organizing it more than I have, I just sign off on shit. But uh, I do have a question for you.”

Bucky’s brows were furrowed as he processed that and then he was nodding, hoping Tony would go on.

“Okay, so…_Chanel, Dior_ or _Dolce & Gabbana?_”

Bucky tilted his head, trying to understand what he was being asked. “I only know what _Chanel _is? I mean, I think I do, it’s a perfume, right?_ Oh,_ they made clothes too, not sure what _Dior _or uh, the other one you said are though.”

Tony huffed but he was still smiling. “_Chanel_ it is.”

Bucky frowned. “_Chanel _what is?”

Tony grinned at him and shook his head. “I know a designer,” Tony explained, the corners of his eyes crinkling in amusement. “I’ll arrange a meeting, a _phone meeting_,” He corrected when he’d seen the slightly panicked look on Bucky’s face. “They’ll gather some ideas, send over some fabrics, colour swatches and the like and they’ll probably show you some sketches and you can give them your feedback. Sound good?”

Bucky took a deep breath, brows pinched in concern. “That all sounds…expensive,” He said slowly.

Tony raised a brow at him in challenge. “You want to do something nice for Stevie, right?”

Bucky grimaced slightly but nodded. “Then you’ll take the appointment and not worry about the bill.”

Bucky blew out a breath as Tony turned around on his stool to start typing away at his computer. “Tony…” Bucky sighed but the genius shook his head.

“Don’t make a big deal about this, Bucky. You’re giving her a gift and I know she’ll love it because _you_ took the time to do something nice for her. Besides, this will be a gift in a way for me _and _you,” Tony laughed.

Bucky tilted his head to look at the man curiously, watching as he started typing an email to Pepper about arranging a meeting. “How’s that?”

Tony hummed, distracted. “When’s the last time you saw Stevie in a _dress_?”

Bucky blinked, lips parting as he went to well, say something to that. He paused, the silence stretching on instead and blinked stupidly when Tony turned to smile at him over his shoulder. “Yeah, that’s what I thought,” He huffed and Bucky flushed a little, ducking his head. “Take the call, you’ll hear from someone before dinner. Anything you want, you ask for. Money is not an issue. You want diamonds? You want gold? You ask and they’ll make it happen-“

“_Tony-_“ Bucky said helplessly; trying to reign the man in was nigh impossible once he got on a roll.

Tony merely smiled, shaking his head at the man, gaze flickering over his frame, noting the comfortable clothes Bucky wore and trying to picture him-

“You’re going to need a suit to match.”

“Tony, _no_,” Bucky breathed, eyes startlingly wide.

Tony huffed, folding his arms in front of his chest. “Why does everyone like saying that to me? No matter-“ He sighed, waving a hand dismissively. “It’s a _Tony, yes_ day and I say you need a suit to match, so-“

He shrugged, as if that was all there was to it and Bucky shook his head helplessly as Tony smiled at him. “You’re coming to the gala. Your paperwork is all but squared away and there’s only the matter of a press conference left to attend to before the world is ready for you.”

Tony’s dark eyes searched Bucky’s grey-blue’s intently then. “Do you think you’re ready for it?”

Bucky swallowed hard. He’d known there would be a press conference in his near future of course, he just…hadn’t been actively thinking about it. Was he ready for that? He shifted, grey-blue orbs still meeting dark brown, taking another moment to think about it before he’d come to a decision.

“Yeah, I-I think I am.”

Tony’s eyes crinkle with the force of his smile, a dangerous glint stealing into his eyes. “Perfect, _now_-“ He eyed Bucky’s metal arm critically before meeting Bucky’s gaze once more. “What do you sat we get you fitted for a new arm and then worry about the suit?”

Bucky took a deep-albeit shaky-breath and nodded slowly and then far more decisively, metal hand whirring in the quiet space between them as he clenched his hands into fists. “I think, I’d have to say...Tony, _yes_.”

Tony grinned at him and Buck was momentarily floored by the absolutely manic glint in those dark eyes as his whole face lit up with the force of his grin.

_He really is beautiful, _Bucky mentally sighed, rather surprised by the thought.

.

The next couple of days went by in such a blur that Bucky was hard-pressed to remember it all. There had been a meeting with two designers, a package delivered containing fabric and colour swatches for Bucky to choose from and even a few sketches of various designs for both the pyjamas and the dress. They were beautiful, all of them. But Bucky had a few more ideas that he eagerly shared with the designers, but only after he’d consulted with Tony on them.

The genius was all too happy to offer his assistance.

Once he’d seen a final sketch of what the pyjamas-and they were truly _nothing_ like the pyjamas he’d ever seen before-and what the dress would look like, chosen the colours and fabric, again, all with Tony’s help, he’d had Sarah’s dress sent out to the designers and the new pieces were put into production. Tony insisted on getting her heels and a clutch to match and Bucky had asked for a simple-although rather elegant-necklace and nothing more.

Tony was all too happy to help him pick it out.

With promises that the garments would arrive with plenty of time before the gala, Stevie’s measurements given to the seamstresses by Tony thanks to his construction of the suit and her sports bras-that had been an interesting conversation with Bucky, by the way-there was nothing else to worry over the gifts.

They turned their sights on their next part of the plan soon after: Bucky’s new arm.

That proved to be trickier than they expected. Tony had advised Bucky that they would need to remove the arm and a good portion of the metal in his shoulder because it was simply too crude for Tony to build upon. They had both had to sit down with Stevie and the others to explain this because it meant that he would be without the arm for a couple of days.

Bucky hadn’t been thrilled by the prospect of having to use only one arm for a day or two, but Stevie was supportive, as were the Team and so was Tony, all insisting that they would help him get along. He’d agreed and they’d made plans to remove it the following day. It had gone smoothly and Tony had placed a cap over his shoulder to keep the area sealed and clean, safe from anything that might hurt or damage the anchor points and loose connections.

It had been crude and the surgery hadn’t been easy to remove some of the more...deteriorated pieces, but Bucky managed and Tony was able to construct something far better and far more comfortable for him. The new arm had been nearly finished by that time-Tony already having started on it _way_ before their conversation-and Bucky had been shown it, even made some adjustments and Tony was pleased that Bucky had spoken up about it.

Then it was time for the press conference.


	22. Chapter 22

Stevie was _pissed_ and wasn’t that the understatement of the century?

Tony had arranged the press conference to reveal Bucky to the world, with Pepper’s help of course. All of the legal work had been finished and it was now official, James Buchanan Barnes was alive and living in the city of New York, free and officially declared the longest surviving POW in US history.

He was cleared of all crimes committed while under the heavy hand of Hydra operatives. There was more than enough documentation of his time in captivity, the procedures and torture he’d endured at their hands, the orders he’d been given and the like to help to exonerate him. It hadn’t been easy to release that kind of information to the public, but it had been wholly necessary and Bucky understood, though Stevie was less than thrilled about it.

She was obviously thrilled that he was cleared of all accounts, of course she was. Her best friend was _free_ after so long and she would do everything imaginable to keep it that way. But she was still pissed to high heaven and back. It didn’t take a genius to figure that out.

They were taking minimal questions at this point during the conference. The group, which included Stevie, Bucky, Tony, Natasha, Clint, Sam, Bruce and even Thor had each given short statements on their experiences with Bucky and how he was doing living with them. They’d all had nice things to say about him and explained some of the ways in which he was learning to rediscover himself. Tony even went so far as to tease him a bit and get a timid smile for his troubles. One that prompted a flurry of camera flashes and a few shouted questions.

Tony had hushed them in typical Tony Stark fashion. He’d distracted them with something or other and brought them back on topic not a moment later. He’d always commanded the room, something that Stevie was currently very grateful for. He was on point and didn’t hurt that he was dressed to the nines in a suit that probably cost more than she’d like to know.

Where he was in a suit and even if it wasn’t his armour, it was an armour for him nevertheless, the rest of the group had opted for their various armours as well. Stevie was in her Captain America uniform looking commanding as ever, her shield lying star-up on the table in front of them. Natasha was in her Widow’s ensemble, Clint in full costume at her side, bow and all. Sam was dressed down, though he wore a well loved leather jacket, his goggles tucked into the front pocket, a lense peeking out from within. Thor was in his royal attire, cape flowing and hammer resting on the table while Bruce remained dressed casually comfortable in dark slacks and a white button down, shirtsleeves rolled up to his elbows.

And Bucky? Bucky was dressed in a pair of comfortably worn black jeans, a pair ofblack _Doc Martens_ and a ridiculously tight _Avengers_ t-shirt from the new line of march that Tony had practically begged him to wear. There was also a navy blue scarf wrapped neatly over his left shoulder, obscuring the cap still fitted over the exposed circuitry and skin.

The group of reporters had been warned early on that their questions would be limited to only a few topics and the question period would be thirty-minutes, no more than that before they’d be on their way. They’d barely gotten through ten of those minutes before Stevie was ready to strangle near on _half_ of them. Where did these people _get_ these questions?

“Would you care to repeat the question,” Stevie said slowly, voice flat, face void of all expression.

Tony had attempted to cut in perhaps to diffuse the situation, but she’d raised a hand slowly to him in warning, asking for quiet. Tony gave it to her, sort of eager to see how this played out. The others at the table remained eerily still while Bucky looked as if he were about ready to vibrate out of his skin with the urge to say _something_ or to get the hell out of there, he wasn’t entirely sure which. Because the man _was_ stupid and he was about to get told just how fucking stupid he was by Captain America herself. Bucky was a little more than afraid for the guy.

“Of course, Captain,” The reporter assured, voice raised louder now. “I asked if there were plans to incorporate Mr. Barnes-“

“_Sergeant _Barnes_,_” Tony corrected and the man nodded, momentarily derailed.

“R-right, sorry. Uh, I asked if there were plans to incorporate _Sergeant_ Barnes into the Avengers, despite him having been a war criminal for more than half his life. His lack of an arm also seems like it could become a hindrance to the Team as a whole and with the controversial nature of his crimes-“

“His_ crimes?_” Stevie whisper-hissed, the microphone so close to her that of course it picked it up, sounding near deafening in the large room.

There was the slow scrape of metal sliding across the stage as Stevie stood up to her full height, her chair scraping harshly against the floor. Her hands were clenched into fists, knuckles white at her sides as her gaze turned sharp, cutting, her chest rising and falling with her barely regulated breaths as she attempted to reign herself in. There was a _very_ unpleasant twist to her lips, now nothing more than a thin line and the whole room grew so silent, you’d swear you could hear a pin drop amongst the crowd’s bated breath.

“Well, y-yes,” The reporter continued, brows furrowing and a cold sweat breaking out across his skin. “Technically, it was Mr-_Sergeant_ Barnes who committed those..._numerous_ murders, executions, more like, even if he was under instruction-“

“_Son-_“ Captain America’s voice sounded like ice, short and sharp, the barely contained _rage_ so close to the surface. “You should sit your ass back down and_ never _utter his name again, because if I have to listen to you call my friend, a man who has _fought_, who had _died_ for his country, because his _imprisonment_ was a death to all that James Buchanan Barnes stood for...I will not be held responsible for my actions. This man-“ She stated firmly, gesturing to where Bucky sat beside her, his gaze solely focused on her while hers remained pinned to the reporter with such venom therein.

“Was experimented on, _tortured_, _brainwashed and commanded _under pain of _death_ to follow out _Hydra_ _orders. _He would never have been given the death that he must have wished for countless times, knowing that they would torture him again and again, subject his brain to endless shocks, his body to near death beatings for the rest of his life with no possible end for him. There was no _choice_ for him,” She nearly spat. “His autonomy had been stripped from him, his ability to make a decision, even something as simple as asking him if he wanted a glass of _water_ would have been impossible for him to answer.”

Stevie was barely managing to hold herself in check now and no one was surprised when the reporter sat down heavily in his seat, face having gone white as a sheet at the sheer amount of _anger_ directed at more than just him. “He is only now able to begin to heal, to touch upon who James Buchanan Barnes once was and find his new self in this time, this future he never thought he would have.”

Stevie took a deep breath then, forcing her heart rate to remain slow and even. “So, I’m going to ask you, _son_,” She breathed, eyes narrowed and fixed on the now cowering reporter. “And you should keep in mind that this is a rhetorical question,” She informed him through clenched teeth. “In what _possible way _could you see this man as a war _criminal_ when he had been kept _prisoner_ under _torture_ so _inconceivable_ to someone like _you-_“ She breathed, inhaling shakily. “For _seventy _god-“ She breathed out roughly through her nose, cutting herself off and thankful she wasn’t so close to the microphone now that she was standing. “For seventy-_years._”

The reporter swallowed hard, face somehow even more ashen at her vehemence.

The room was still entirely too silent but Stevie could hear nothing over the racing of her own heart, the blood _pounding_ in her ears as it rushed through her veins. So of course Tony had to say _something_.

“I think that’s enough questions for today,” He said decisively, rising to his feet and buttoning his grey blazer absently.

The others were quick to follow suit and there were no more questions when Pepper took up a microphone herself and voiced a final conclusion of her own, the dutiful reciting of the legal closing following and any pertinent updates she needed to share.

Bucky was slow to stand, however, gaze not having left Stevie’s profile as she’d spoken, as she’d _defended him_. He watched as she picked up the shield and slipped it easily into her harness, hands shaking in anger, before she was turning to make her way to the side of the stage with the others. She was blocked, however, by an unmoving Bucky.

She stilled, having taken a step into his space already and after a deep breath, forced herself to meet his grey-blue stare. Bucky was looking back at her with an unreadable expression on his handsome face and she...she really didn’t know what to do about it.

She frowned when Bucky’s eyes seemed to narrow just slightly and then swept down and back up her frame only to meet her eyes once again. She was about to ask him if he was alright, but didn’t get the chance.

“_Я люблю тебя, ты проклятый дурак_,” Bucky muttered, turning on his heel and waving her to follow.

Stevie’s brows only furrowed deeper at that, not understanding the Russian, but she dutifully followed him nevertheless-always would-while pointedly ignoring Tony’s soft snicker at her back as he followed the rest of the Team off stage.

.

“You never did answer his question, Cap,” Tony teased on the ride back to the compound.

Stevie arched a delicate blonde brow. “About bringing Bucky on the Team? I didn’t think he actually _deserved _an answer, do you?”

Tony hummed, clearly agreeing, already glancing to where Bucky had been pointedly looking out the window since they got into the limousine.

“You said it yourself way back when, Tony,” She huffed, still riled and more than annoyed. “I pretty well invited him to join the Team from the get go, on your condition that he wasn’t feeling all _murdery_,” She muttered and Tony winced a bit.

He’d used those words once upon a time and yeah, she was a bit sore today so he hadn’t exactly not expected some kind of anger to be turned on one of them after the disaster that was the question period. At least he was used to simply brushing it off.

“_Stevie,_” Bucky said, tone plaintive and she curled in on herself slightly, feeling a bit guilty for snapping at Tony like that, but Bucky still wasn’t looking at her so she was upset, sue her.

“_Bucky-_“ She mumbled, only a smidge petulant.

Bucky rolled his eyes and turned his now flat stare on her. She really did try not to squirm under his watchful gaze and ended up sitting unnaturally still, hands clasped over the edge of the shield, her hands still shaking slightly; she tried hard to pretend not to notice.

“If anyone should be worried about someone goin’ all _murdery_, it’s us, pal. I thought that poor reporter was going to piss his pants,” Bucky sighed, his carefully blank expression relaxing into a teasing smile. “I mean, you even said _ass_ on television, Stevie.”

Stevie huffed, shoulders dropping in relief, even as her cheeks flushed crimson at the fact. “Yeah, well...he pissed me off,” She mumbled, already glancing away.

Bucky shook his head while Tony and the others snickered. “_Really?_ I hadn’t noticed.”

The sarcasm grated on her and Stevie scowled at nothing. Bucky huffed, rolling his eyes at the non-response. “Yeah, well-“ She muttered again, not bothering to say more.

Bucky sighed and sat back in his seat, gaze flickering over Stevie’s frame again. She still looked tense, but now there was colour in her cheeks at least. He tried to keep his smile in check as he glanced out the window, murmuring under his breath, nearly too quiet to hear, “_Ты чертовски хорош, когда злишься, кукла._”

Stevie heard him but she only frowned, not understanding while at the same time trying to memorize the words so she could look them up later.

She never did end up looking them up.

.

After the press conference, the Team had regrouped back at the compound while Tony went ahead and ordered them lunch. It’d gone better than any of them had expected. Bucky hadn’t been entirely convinced that _someone, _read: _Stevie_ wasn’t actually going to murder someone while defending him, but it had gone well despite the idiotic questions.

It was one thing to know that despite all he’d done, Stevie and the people who have helped him to get where he is today would defend him, it was another thing entirely to _hear_ it, let alone _see _it. And having listened to the Team give their statements, having listened to _Tony _and _Stevie_ give him nothing but praise, it was enough to make him feel loved and cared for and at the same time make his head spin with the feeling. It’d been entirely too much and more than he thought he ever deserved.

On top of that, he’d felt uncomfortable out there without his arm, letting all of those people see him without it was difficult, but not nearly as difficult as the Team. He’d struggled a bit the last day with getting ready, putting on clothes and just..._doing things_, but Stevie had kept her word and helped him as best she could. The others as well. It’d been a bit awkward getting dressed with Stevie’s help, intimate in a way he hadn’t expected, but it worked; even if they were both blushing lightly by the time they had headed out.

With full bellies and the stress of the morning finally over and done with, everyone settled into the communal living room to decompress with a good bout of video games and the promise of snacks and movies and probably more takeout for dinner. They really needed to learn to cook for themselves. Take out was _not_ good for the figure.

No one mentioned the press conference again, no one mentioned Stevie dressing down that reporter again and Bucky was finally relaxed and curled up on the sofa watching the group fight over who got to race who in the next round of _Mario Kart. _That’s when his eyes fell to Stevie.

She’d grown quieter after lunch but she’d followed them into the living room and now she was curled up in the lazy boy with a blanket draped over her frame. She didn’t appear to really be watching them play games, nor was she reading or drawing either. She was just…sitting, staring at her hands with that small furrow between her brows.

Bucky wasn’t sure what was wrong, but he didn’t like it, nor was he sure how to go about checking in with her without drawing the attention of the rest of the group. When Peter showed up around dinner time, Bucky finally managed to get close enough to talk to her.

He’d gotten up to offer to grab a drink for Peter and then taken up the spot on the sofa closest to Stevie, even if there was still a foot or so between them. “Hey,” He called softly and he might as well have shouted her name, she startled so badly.

She huffed, shaking her head. “Sorry, Buck, hey.”

Bucky frowned at her unexpected reaction. “Everything alright? You’ve been awfully quiet.”

Stevie shrugged, smiling faintly as she glanced to him and then just as quickly turned her attention to the television. “Yeah, ’m fine, just tired.”

Bucky looked towards the television where Clint was busy setting up a movie for them to watch while they ate dinner. “You sure?”

Stevie turned back to look at him and then smiled, that deep crease between her brow softening so much more. The conflict in her eyes, however, gave her away. “I’m sure, Buck,” She murmured, reaching out to clasp her hand atop Bucky’s on the armrest.

Bucky let himself nod and when she pulled her hand back a moment later and went back to watching but not seeing the television, he really wasn’t sure what else to do. Whatever was bothering her, she clearly didn’t want to talk about it. So, Bucky did the only thing he could. He sat back in his seat and left her be. If she wanted to tell him, she would.

.

In all honesty, Stevie was not so sure. She had been wracked with guilt since they’d gotten back to the compound. She’d defended Bucky, of course she had. There would never come a time where she wouldn’t. There would never be a _universe_ where she wouldn’t. It was _Bucky_, god damn it and really, that was the problem, wasn’t it?

She was pretty sure the whole world had seen her outburst as a proclamation of her love for Bucky. Because what had she really done? Yes, she’d defended him, but she also basically said, _fuck with him and I will end you_ and yeah, okay…the poor reporter had looked like he was going to piss his pants but he _totally_ deserved it. No one badmouthed Bucky and got away with it. No one badmouthed her _friends_ and got away with it.

She swallowed thickly, excusing herself to go to the bathroom while they queued up the movie, trying not to scowl too hard at nothing along the way. Now safely tucked away in the bathroom down the hall, she felt like she could breathe. She didn’t regret standing up to the reporter, not at all. But she did regret the harsh tone she’d taken with Tony in the car. It was a small dig, in all honesty. She’d known Tony had just been trying to lighten the mood when they’d first brought Bucky back to their home and didn’t honestly mean what he’d said.

But it had still stuck with her apparently enough to sting a bit and using that to dig at him hadn’t been kind. She scrubbed a hand over her face and sighed, bracing her elbows on the countertop and looked into the mirror above the sink.

“What are you doing?” She whispered, distraught.

She felt like a complete idiot, not only had she basically told the world she’d _always choose Bucky_, she felt like she’d told Bucky _and _Tony the very same thing with her actions. She exhaled shakily, closing her eyes.

Truthfully, she hadn’t chosen _either_ of them. Yes, she’d go to the ends of the Earth to protect Bucky but she’d _also_ not fail to do the same for Tony. She loved them _both_ and the _guilt_ over that alone was beginning to consume her. Today had just been the icing on the proverbial cake.

How could someone love two people in the same way? How could someone be in love with two people so strongly and so fiercely?

_That’s easy,_ a little voice piped up. _It’s Bucky Barnes and Tony Stark, why are you so surprised?_

She huffed, shaking her head as she stood up, unable to meet her reflection in the mirror for a long moment. She found her strength to do so shortly after and sighed, “You’re in love with two incredible people, Rogers. It really shouldn’t surprise you.”

_Your mother always told you, you had a big heart_, the voice, which suspiciously sounded like Bucky, whispered again. Stevie nodded to no one and left the safety of the bathroom.

She’d barely taken two steps out the door, however, before the phone in her back pocket was vibrating. Taking a second, she pulled her phone out and found an email…from Jarvis? She frowned down at the screen. Jarvis only sent them emails when he was passing along paperwork and usually they were CC’d to Pepper. This was…just from Jarvis.

Stevie looked around and was about to ask Jarvis what was up instead of reading the email, when her gaze snagged on a word on the screen: _polyamorous._

The word was entirely unfamiliar to her and she found herself curious, scrolling a little further. Her eyes were instantly as wide as saucers and she hastily looked around her to see if anyone was there to witness her momentary shock. Finding herself in the clear, she leaned back against the hallway wall with wide eyes. “Jarvis?” She whispered uncertainly.

“I trust the information I have sent you will be helpful,” He merely stated, voice hushed and Stevie’s cheeks practically burst into flames at the implication.

She exhaled shakily and quickly locked her phone, shoving it as deep as it would go into her pocket. “Do me a favour and don’t listen in when I’m in the bathroom next time,” She managed through gritted teeth.

When Jarvis next spoke, she imagined that he sounded more smug than apologetic. “Of course, Captain.”

.

Needless to say, once she was safely inside her room later that night, she found herself sitting with her phone nearly pressed to her face, eyes wide and lips parted, cheeks incredibly flushed. “_Huh_, guess this is an actual thing,” She wondered aloud, slowly lowering her phone.

She locked it absently and set it on the nightstand, shifting onto her side as she let her gaze drift to the floor to ceiling windows. There wasn’t a lot to see outside, it was dark after all and they were a ways from the city. But there were some stars here, not bright by any means, but pretty nevertheless. The light of the Moon still shone through and she exhaled shakily as she attempted to let go of some of the guilt she’d been feeling.

_Loving more than one person is very much a thing, it even has a name. But not everyone agrees it’s possible to love two people equally. Maybe equally isn’t quite right either? Because I love Bucky, I’ve loved Bucky for so long, it’s like he’s become a part of me. But with Tony, it’s different. Not in a bad way, just...I can see myself with him, fitting into his space, his life, his every day. I can see myself with Bucky too, though. I can see myself with him in our apartment, sharing a bed, sharing my life, my passions. That’s the same for both of them, but can I see myself _**_with_**_ both of them? Together? Would they believe that I loved them both with all of myself, with everything I have and not favour one, more than the other?_ She frowned at the thought, lips pursing as she breathed out harshly through her nose.

_Maybe they wouldn’t believe that to be something that is possible. Maybe they wouldn’t think it can be real or true. Just because some people believe it’s possible, doesn’t mean they will and yes, they get along, they like each other well enough, but would it really work if they didn’t love each other too? I’m not even sure of their sexuality. Christ, this is too much to think about. You’re getting way ahead of yourself, Rogers._

She swallowed hard, eyes drifting shut as she readjusted her blankets, tugging them up over her shoulder. She didn’t want to be forced to make a choice between them. She knew she would rather remain their friends and pine in secret for the rest of her life if it meant they could stay together as they are now. She cared about them both far too much to ever let a thing like sex get in the way.

She was happy now, she was. She was happy that Bucky was here, healthy and healing. She was happy that Tony was healthy and friendly, still as helpful as ever. She was happy for her friends, for their ability to all get along. They were a family first and foremost, the kind of love she had for the pair could complicate things if she ever pursued either of them, which, she wouldn’t. Couldn’t, if she was honest with herself.

She’d let the feelings eat away at her forever if it meant they could be together as they are without having to choose, without having to risk either of their friendships. She could never risk their friendships.

Besides, there were lots of ways to show someone you cared about them that didn’t involve…that kind of intimacy. It was fine. She was happy. She was.

.

Stevie found time to quietly apologize to Tony the morning Bucky was fitted with his new arm. It’d been a quiet aside as Bucky was helped up onto the bed by Peter and Bruce. She’d tugged him away from the other men gently and let out a heartfelt sigh as she let her gaze sweep over Tony’s face.

“I’m sorry, Tony…for the other day. I snapped at you and I’m sorry, it was wrong of me,” She apologized quietly.

Tony frowned, shaking his head gently. “It’s really okay, Stevie. I know you didn’t mean it, you were frustrated and upset. We all were, those last couple questions were pushing all of our buttons.”

Stevie sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Yeah, but I didn’t need to take out my anger on you, Tony.”

Tony huffed and shrugged. “No, you didn’t. But I forgive you anyway. No harm done,” He assured her, gently squeezing her shoulder.

She let out a heavy breath and cast her friend a gentle smile. “Thanks, Tony.”

Tony waved her off and Stevie bit her lower lip as she followed him over to where Bucky was getting comfortable, seeing as she had to say a quick goodbye…

Because Stevie was _not_ allowed to be present for the surgery. No matter how much she begged, Bucky had insisted he wanted to do this on his own and that Peter and Tony had everything covered. He would be _fine _and she’d had no choice but to wait outside the workshop, sitting on the floor with the glass of the lab completely opaque. She couldn’t see a damn thing, couldn’t _hear_ a damn thing and she was going _insane._

Sam, Natasha and then Clint had come by to sit with her at random times. They brought her coffee and snacks because she insisted she was not leaving in case they needed her. The entire process took three-hours and twenty-eight minutes and during that time she didn’t leave the safety of the hallway in front of the lab; even when she had to pee so badly she thought she might burst.

She _swore_ they were the longest minutes of her _life._

So it was with great restraint that when the glass hiding the workshop turned see-through once again, did she get to her feet and practically press her face to the glass in hopes of being let in. Peter was there to greet her with a tired grin and Stevie’s heart melted when the doors opened and he let her in.

“He’s _fine_,” Peter quickly assured. “He’s sleeping right now, the anesthetic is doing its thing. It should wear off in about a half hour according to Bruce. But you can come sit with him if you want and Tony will talk you through everything.”

She was nodding before he’d even finished speaking and she really did try not to feel embarrassed by her eagerness to get to Bucky, but there it was.

Tony huffed from where he was cleaning his hands at the lab sink, glancing over his shoulder at Stevie as she swept into the lab. “Hey, take my seat beside him, don’t touch anything, I’ll be right there.”

She murmured a soft _okay_ and all but fell onto Tony’s recently vacated chair, Peter coming to sit down on the rolling stool near Bucky’s hip. “How did it go?” She asked quietly, gaze flickering over Bucky’s face.

He was sleeping and even though his face was somewhat lax in sleep, she could see deep furrows etched into his brow and around his mouth.

“It went well,” Tony sighed. “But it was more painful than we anticipated. Really tested our painkillers, that’s for sure. It put a strain on him but he insisted we continue so…”

Stevie glanced up at Tony as he came to stand on Bucky’s right side next to Peter, settling a hand against the younger man’ shoulder. “Thank you, Tony,” She breathed, swallowing thickly at the thought of Bucky being in pain.

She wasn’t at all surprised to know that Bucky had insisted on finishing the procedure. He’d told her just the night before that he couldn’t wait to get to finally be truly rid of Hydra tech and have a piece of StarkTech all to himself.

“I’m glad we were able to give him this,” Tony murmured, Peter sighing and nodding as well.

“You must be exhausted,” She admitted, frowning as she let her gaze flicker over them both and then looked up when Bruce came out of the workshop’s bathroom.

They _all_ looked exhausted. She could see the weariness on Bruce’s face, Peter’s too, exhaustion mirrored even more so in Tony’s. The lines around his eyes and dark circles beneath them so much more pronounced than usual.

“Yeah, but we did it and now we get to sit back and relax, wait for sleeping beauty to wake up and activate the arm. We’re past the hard part now,” Tony sighed, letting his gaze linger on Bucky’s face and then back down along the new arm.

It wasn’t shiny silver any more. They thought something matte black would be more appropriate. Bucky’s always enjoyed his darker colours and when Tony pitched the idea to him, he’d been all for it. With just one exception.

“_Is there any way we can make the seams silver and...I’d like it if it somehow had a network of lines like rivers all bleeding in to one another. Is-do you think that would be possible? I know I’m not much of an artist, but maybe I can get Stevie to draw something up, so you know what I mean,_” Bucky had asked and he’d sounded so shy and Tony had just _melted_.

They’d ended up talking to Stevie about it that afternoon and after a couple of attempts, they had an idea of what it might look like. Tony had gone ahead and made the changes that night, forgoing sleep because this was _so _much more exciting.

So, the new arm was matte black, beautiful and striking, all of the seams a thin plated silver though made from metals far stronger. The rivers were slightly wider, only by a few millimetres thickness, but they trailed almost absently from the join over his left pectoral muscle and around the scapula, right down to his wrist, disappearing into thing trails of black on the inside of his wrist as it bled into the palm; where on the top of his hand, the silver rivers bled almost to his knuckles before they disappeared into black there as well.

It was gorgeous and Tony was so proud to have made it for him, to have given something back to Bucky. Something to call his own.

“It looks beautiful, Tony,” Stevie told him, voice quiet still and Tony smirked.

“Of course it is, I made it.”

Peter huffed, Bruce sighing and Stevie’s eyes crinkled with the force of her smile, adoring the way Tony smirked and turned his gaze away, hand rubbing the back of his neck absently.

“When he wakes up, he might be a bit out of it, so I thought when he starts coming to, we would take a step back so you can talk to him. He was a bit worried about us upping the anesthesia, but we didn’t have a choice, his metabolism-“

Just then, Bucky made a soft noise, his brow creasing and Stevie raised a hand in a gesture for quiet, Peter, Bruce and Tony very quietly moving a couple of paces away. His metabolism obviously worked through the anesthesia too quickly for their liking.

“Bucky? Hey, can you hear me?” Stevie asked softly, careful to keep her voice down.

Bucky groaned softly and nodded, lashes fluttering as he tried to come out of it. “That’s good, pal. Just take a couple’a slow breaths for me, relax. I’m right here,” She consoled, gently placing a hand on his head, brushing back some of his longer hair.

Bucky grunted what sounded like an affirmative and when he turned into Stevie’s touch, they all exhaled collectively in relief. “That’s good, Buck. Just relax. I’ve got Bruce, Peter and Tony here with me, you’re still in the workshop, your surgery’s over and you’re doing so good, Buck,” She murmured, barely managing to resist the urge to press a kiss to his temple, settling instead for carding her hand carefully through his hair, marvelling once again at how soft it was.

“M’okay?” Bucky asked, brows pinching up in discomfort and Stevie hummed, attempting to soothe his worries.

“Yeah, pal, you’re golden. How’re you feeling? Any pain?” She asked quietly.

“N-not really, just ‘n ache, my neck,” Bucky admitted and Stevie made a curious sound, glancing to Tony.

“He pulled out of the first round of anesthesia, strained himself a bit when we were trying to calm him down, nothing major happened,” He insisted and Stevie nodded, clearly worried. “Think he may have just strained his neck a bit. Is it tense, Bucky? That kind of ache? Stiff?”

Bucky mumbled a quiet _yeah_ and Tony nodded. “I’m sure Stevie will rub it better for you,” Tony chuckled softly and Stevie rolled her eyes, Peter and Bruce smiling at the exchange.

“Sounds good,” Bucky sighed, not mumbling nearly as badly now as he finally blinked open his eyes.

When grey-blue orbs found those sky blues, Bucky’s whole face lit up. “There ya’are, pretty,” He sighed and Stevie’s cheeks flushed so quickly, she felt dizzy with it.

“T-told you I was right here, pal,” She whispered, throat tight and an all too familiar heat building behind her eyes.

It’d been so _long_ since he’d called her that. She was absolutely near tears now and she forced herself to take a steadying breath. Bucky’s smile turned even _more_ dopey somehow. “You feelin’ alright now? Anything I can get you?”

“Some water, maybe?” He asked, reaching up with his right hand to rub tiredly at his eyes.

“I got it,” Peter assured, heading for the fridge by the sink for a bottle of water.

They helped him sip a bit of water, but he wasn’t able to sit up much yet what with the new arm not fully activated yet.

“Just a couple more minutes, Bucky. Then we can get you up and running. Just gotta make sure you’re with it enough to tell us how you’re feeling,” Tony explained while the three played musical chairs.

Stevie was now sitting beside Peter and holding Bucky’s flesh and blood hand, Bruce tapping absently on a tablet monitoring Bucky’s vitals at the man’s feet and Tony was settled on Bucky’s left side with the wrist panel open on the arm. Bucky didn’t argue and let himself be coddled for a few minutes, still feeling a bit out of it. The water had helped though...and Stevie’s hands, if he were being entirely honest with himself. He liked it when she played with his hair and vowed to never learn to do a proper bun so that she was forced to help him every time. He almost snickered at the thought.

Tony chatted to both Bucky and Stevie about the surgery, how everything had gone and how Bucky had responded, Bruce chiming in with information about the painkillers and anesthesia they’d used. It was clear that Bucky had been in a fair amount of pain shortly after starting, but they’d gotten it under control pretty quickly. With the super soldier metabolism it was difficult to gage proper measurements for meds at times, even with Stevie’s lengthy visits to the hospital herself, there was only so much data to go by and Bucky didn’t exactly have _Erskine’s _serum.

“I’m feelin’ pretty good now,” Bucky sighed, stretching out his neck a bit. “Neck ain’t even that sore anymore.”

“Great, uh, we can wake it up then. I know we’ve talked about it a bit but just so you’re aware, the arm is powered by Reactor tech so it’s all clean energy and stuff. It’ll survive EMP’s without difficulty and all that as well. But uh, when you _first _power it up, it’s a bit of a rush,” Tony explained.

“A rush?” Stevie prompted, clearly nervous and Tony tried to hold back a grimace.

“Yeah, it’s a little uncomfortable but not exactly _painful_, just-“ He shrugged, lips twisting. “I don’t really know how else to explain it other than saying it’s like a jolt to your senses, maybe closer to an adrenaline rush?”

Bucky hummed under his breath, mulling that over and couldn’t help glancing to Stevie for a moment. Adrenaline rushes affected everyone differently and Bucky was a little too familiar with how _Stevie_ had handled them while they’d been behind enemy lines. It had...been an interesting revelation, that was for sure. So of course when Bucky tried to meet her gaze, she wasn’t looking at him and her cheeks were just _a little bit _pink. _Ah,_ still a thing for her now then. He tried not to laugh. She’d been rather embarrassed when she’d had to tell Bucky about it way back when and he was sure she wasn’t up for a second explanation.

“Right, okay, doesn’t sound so bad,” He huffed, an adrenaline rush he could deal with...even if they had a similar affect on him too.

Tony arched a brow at him in question when Stevie refused to meet _any_ of their gazes for a moment, seemingly _very_ preoccupied with the loose thread she’d found on her sleeve. Bucky had no issues smirking at Tony in a sort of non-response and sue him, he was rather intrigued.

“It’s not,” Tony insisted, still curious and glancing between the pair. “You think you’re ready?”

Bucky nodded, taking a deeper breath. “Yeah, go for it. Can’t wait to arm wrestle with the armour after this.”

Tony grinned, he had promised Bucky they’d do just that. Stevie laughed softly and Peter grinned. “I can’t wait to see that,” The kid admitted.

Bucky huffed and glanced up into Tony’s face as he leaned over the arm a bit more. “Alright, calm breath in, breathe out and don’t hold it,” Tony instructed, gently inserting the little jewellers screwdriver into the mechanism. After he’d quickly removed it, he counted. “Three, two, one-“

Bucky’s entire body jerked and tensed. It was like a punch to the gut as the arm came online and he wheezed in his next breath at the sudden rush. “Jesus _fuck-_“ He gasped while the other four started shouting at him asking if he was okay.

Bucky grunted and found himself sitting up hastily, practically doubling over his knees as he swung them to the side of the bed closest to Tony. “I’m fine-I’m fine-“ He gasped, embarrassed laughter bursting out of him.

Tony looked mildly alarmed at the sight, hands outstretched as if ready to catch Bucky in case he _did_ fall and Bucky was certain Stevie looked about a thousand times worse so he purposely _did not look._

“Honest, I’m good,” He insisted, still laughing as he attempted to cover his middle with his flesh arm while giving Tony a sort of pleading look...before he gestured to his crotch.

“Are you sure? Because, oh-_oh-_“ Tony breathed, suddenly _completely_ understanding the situation. “_Wow_, uh-“

Bucky rolled his eyes and puffed out a breath. “I’m fine, really, here uh you mind if I?” He gestured towards the workshop’s bathroom with the metal hand and they were _all_ momentarily distracted by the sight because, _shiny._

“Sure, sure,” Tony agreed, grinning and trying not to burst out laughing in the process.

Bucky just shook his head, casting an apologetic look over his shoulder as he rose to head for the bathroom...trying _very _hard not to waddle on his way there. Peter and Bruce looked _beyond_ lost at this point and Stevie was...still not looking at anyone, cheeks absolutely _burning_ with the knowledge that yep, adrenaline rushes uh...made everything just a _teensy tiny _bit more sensitive when it had the serum to back it.

While Bucky was locked safely in the bathroom to...take care of his problem, Peter was left confused and trying to figure out what the problem was.

“How about we leave it for now, Pete? Bucky’s fine,” Tony insisted, still smirking and Stevie huffed, still avoiding their gazes. “Thanks for your help today, by the way.”

“Oh, it was no trouble, Mr. Stark. This was a great learning opportunity and the arm is _so cool_ and Bucky’s awesome so I’m happy I got to help, you know?”

Tony smiled, glancing down at his hands and avoiding Stevie’s gaze as she turned to look at him with a small smile stretching her lips. “Glad you got to help too, Pete,” He agreed and looked up a moment later when he heard Stevie rolling closer to Peter on her stool.

“I know I’m happy it was you three looking after Bucky with this,” She admitted, wrapping her arms around Peter’s shoulders and dragging him into a hug.

Peter was smiling as he hugged her back, a soft embarrassed laugh escaping him. “Wasn’t any trouble,” He demurred, glancing towards Tony and Bruce.

He sighed and shook his head at the pair. “Really wasn’t,” Tony agreed.

.

So, the surgery had gone well and Bucky had been fitted with the new arm and even though he’d been a little embarrassed at the end, getting to arm wrestle Tony after while he wore the suit, well...that was _pretty freaking awesome_, in Peter’s words.

The entire Team had gotten together after that, despite Bucky being exhausted, Tony, Bruce and Peter too. They all wanted to cozy up in the common room and watch movies until they passed out. So of course they ordered take out, Thai food this time and made it happen.

The first hour of Team bonding time was mainly focused around fawning all over Bucky’s new arm and it was admittedly pretty cool. Stevie thought so anyway and that was _before_ she’d traced a delicate finger along one of the ‘rivers,’ tracing the path down towards the inside of his wrist.

Bucky had frozen at the incredibly light touch, because...because he could _really_ _feel it_. The warmth, the pressure...he was even sure he could discern Stevie’s _pulse_ through the impossibly light touch.

“_Wow,_” Bucky breathed, completely caught off guard, a shiver running up the length of his spine and goosebumps breaking out along the back of his neck.

Stevie stilled, looking up into his face in concern. “What’s wrong?”

Bucky shook his head, momentarily stunned.

“It’s probably pretty sensitive right now,” Tony admitted, plonking himself down on the armrest closest to Stevie.

“Oh?” She asked, glancing over her shoulder at him and watched as Tony attempted to hide his smirk behind his next sip of coffee.

Too bad the crinkle of his eyes gave him away entirely. Bucky huffed softly and shook his head.

“Don’t worry, it’ll settle in a few days and if you’re not happy with the level of sensitivity then, we can adjust it until you’re satisfied,” Tony assured.

Bucky tried not to appear nearly affected as he actually was right now from a simple _touch_. He huffed softly and shook his head, knowing Tony was getting a kick out of this. “Sure, pal,” He muttered, raising an only _slightly_ menacing brow at the man. He’d be sure to talk to Tony later.

He couldn’t help but notice how Stevie’s touch had disappeared pretty quickly after that, however, but what he didn’t notice, unlike Tony, was how her fingers kept twitching on her right thigh as if she _wanted_ to reach out and run her fingertips along the length of Bucky’s forearm. Tony thought it was a damn shame she wasn’t taking advantage of how..._sensitive _Bucky was right now. He somehow knew he wouldn’t have been quite nearly reserved if he was given the chance.

_Huh_, Tony wondered. _That’s interesting._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Russian translations for the above chapter. I don't speak Russian and I'm sorry, but I used Google translate. <3 Be kind.
> 
> Я люблю тебя, ты проклятый дурак. - I love you, you damned fool.
> 
> Ты чертовски хорош, когда злишься, кукла - You’re damned pretty when you’re pissed off, doll.


	23. Chapter 23

So, Bucky is nervous. Like, _super _nervous. You know, on account of being a super soldier and all. But _why_ he is nervous is another thing entirely.

“Would you stop pacing, you’re making me anxious,” Tony sighed, rubbing at his temples.

Bucky stopped his pacing, now turned to look at Tony who was sitting a few feet away from him on one of his rolling stools. They’d been in the workshop for two hours now, Tony running a few tests on the arm to make sure all was still well. Bucky really didn’t need to _stay_ in the shop anymore, but he couldn’t bring himself to leave yet.

“Sorry,” He apologized…though Tony wasn’t exactly pleased to note that now that he’d stopped his pacing, he was practically vibrating out of his own damn skin. “I can’t help it.”

He rolled his eyes and it somehow physically _pained_ him to do so. “_Bucky_-“ Tony sighed, looking up at the man with an exasperated smile. “You need to stop worrying. She’s going to love it, trust me.”

Bucky made a soft noise in his throat and turned to look away…at nothing in particular. Tony resisted rolling his eyes _again,_ but only just.

“But what if she doesn’t wear it? That’d mean something, wouldn’t it?” He asked worriedly, chewing at his bottom lip; Tony wasn’t sure he wouldn’t bite it off in the near future.

Tony breathed a weary sigh and stood, walking over to the man. Bucky purposely kept his gaze fixed elsewhere as he approached and Tony gently settled a hand on the man’s metal shoulder. When he squeezed and sighed a soft, “_Hey,_” Bucky finally looked at him and what Tony saw made his heart break just that much more.

“She’s going to love it and she’s going to wear it,” Tony assured him, voice gentle and kind and Bucky’s face contorted, brows pinching up and Tony _swore_ he could see tears gathering behind his eyes.

“But how do you _know_ that?” He stressed, voice nothing but a broken whisper.

Tony sighed and shook his head, smiling warmly at the man. “Because you took the time to make something for her. You took the time to think about her and the effort to make something beautiful out of something very special to her. She will see it for what it is and she will wear it, not just for you but for her mother and herself too.”

Bucky exhaled shakily. “Why are you doing this?”

Tony blinked and more than a little surprised, he let his hand fall from Bucky’s shoulder. “Doing what?”

Bucky watched as the genius seemed to squint at him in confusion. “Why are you trying to get her to see me like this?” He asked curiously.

Tony inhaled slowly and turned away from Bucky, those carefully constructed walls of his going up block by block. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Bucky barely resisted the urge to growl as he came around, stepping in front of Tony and blocking his path as he went to stand. He startled only slightly and was forced to meet Bucky’s gaze. “Yes, you do,” He challenged. “Tell me why.”

Tony exhaled roughly through his nose and shook his head, unable to break his stare. “You are her first love, Bucky. I only want to see you both happy.”

Bucky breathed out harshly and shook his head. “I am happy and so is she, we don’t need to be together to be happy, Tony.”

Tony scowled and shook his head. “You’re lying to yourself, Buck. I see the way you look at her, the way she looks at you-“

“What about the way she looks at _you?_” Bucky interrupted. “The way you look at her.”

Tony stilled and then tried to take a step around him. Bucky didn’t exactly let him, blocking the man’s path yet again. “I think it’s you who’s lyin’ to himself,” Bucky told him.

Tony outright _glared_ at the man. “_Don’t,_ you don’t know what you’re talking about-“

“I think I do, Stark,” Bucky refuted, shaking his head. “You told me you recognized the signs, you think I can’t recognize them too?”

Tony grimaced, looking away but made no further attempt to leave. Bucky had sort of boxed him in against his desk, even if there was a bit of space still between them.

“What’ll you have me do about it then?” Tony breathed, shaking his head as he stared across the workshop, his gaze catching on a red blanket folded neatly over the back of the sofa he sometimes liked to take naps on. “You should be furious with me,” He murmured, losing steam.

The blanket was draped over the back of the, the same sofa Stevie sat on when she was down here drawing, that same blanket draped over her shoulders because it could be cool down here. She _always_ folded the blanket before she left, unlike Tony.

“I’m not angry with you, Tony. I’ve told you that before…but I’m also not sure what do to about it,” Bucky admitted quietly. “We’re both stupidly in love with her.”

Tony huffed, turning his sights back on Bucky, the man staring despondently at the floor. “Right fools, aren’t we?”

Bucky hummed in agreement. “I don’t feel right pursuing her when you still love her, when she clearly still loves you.”

Tony made a soft noise then and Bucky looked up at him. “I’ll try harder, Buck. I won’t be so involved, I-I can step back more, you shouldn’t have to-“

“_Tony-_“ Bucky sighed, brows pinched in concern. “Don’t do that to her, please, don’t do that to her. You’re her friend, it’d kill her if you distanced yourself from her-“

“Then what am I supposed to do?!” Tony nearly shouted, hands flying up in his frustration.

Bucky shook his head slowly. He had no idea. “I don’t know.”

Tony’s shoulders slumped in defeat and they simply stood there not staring at one another for a long minute.

“You know, she told me that she felt responsible for your death,” Tony began quietly.

Bucky’s gaze snapped up to look at Tony but the man was still staring at nothing, avoiding his gaze. “What?”

“She was drunk. One night I-I was going up to see her, see if she wanted to watch a movie or something,” He said a little stiltedly. “I found her drunk on Asgardian liqueur.”

He did look up at Bucky then and took a shaky breath when he found the man staring at him with such sadness in his eyes. “I tried to talk to her, get her to calm down and she just-she told me who you were to her. It was the date she’d lost you, when you’d fallen from the train.”

Bucky blanched slightly and Tony looked to him apologetically. “She blamed herself, I-I was _stunned_ that she did. After all those years, she blamed herself for your fall. I told her it was wrong to do so, it was never her fault and-and that you wouldn’t have believed it ever was. That you’d never blame her for it either,” Tony told him, voice quiet.

“I wouldn’t have, I-I don’t blame her, Tony. I have _never_ blamed her,” Bucky finally breathed and Tony’s gaze softened.

He nodded, wanting to console the man. “I know that and I tried to make her see that too. But she-she told me something else,” He admitted quietly.

Bucky’s grey-blue eyes searched his, filled with a desperate sort of curiosity. It made Tony’s heart ache. “She told me that she’d…failed you,” He explained gently. “And that she couldn’t…fail me too.”

Bucky just…_stopped_. Every muscle in his body seemed to simply turn to mush. He felt like he was suddenly falling all over again and then Tony’s softly spoken words filtered in. “She then tried to tell me that I couldn’t fall in love with her, too.”

Bucky’s gaze had fallen to the man’s chest, unable to hold Tony’s dark eyes, but now his grey-blue orbs were fixed on Tony.

“_Tony_,” Bucky whispered, voice hoarse, strained with emotion.

Tony smiled at him a little sadly then. “I told her she didn’t get to tell me what to do, not off the field. I put her to bed and we’d agree to talk about it the next day.”

“What happened?” Bucky couldn’t help but ask, his voice sounding impossibly small.

Tony’s smile was still in place, but it looked brittle, his eyes glossy with tears. “She found you.”

Bucky took a stumbling step back, feeling entirely blindsided by the information. They had been _so close_, so _close_ to being together. He’d ruined it, ruined everything. He shook his head, face twisted in dismay and Tony shook his head, concern marring his features as he followed.

“_Bucky-_“ Tony tried, the last thing he wanted was for him to feel guilty.

“I ruined-“

“_No-_“ Tony blurted, shaking his head as he reached out to grab Bucky by his biceps. “You didn’t, Bucky. I am so, _so_ happy she found you, you have to understand that. If she had told me she loved me that very morning, I would have _still_ been happy she had found you. She’d denied herself for so long, blamed herself for something so far out of her control and punished herself for it. She didn’t date, never gave any man-or woman-the time of day and people threw themselves at her _all_ the time.”

Tony exhaled roughly. “I don’t think she would ever rid herself of the guilt she felt over losing you. Even if we gave it a try, I think she would have carried that with her forever.”

Bucky’s heart _ached_ at the words. _How could she have felt such guilt? Did she still harbour it? _He wondered.

“I’m sorry I dumped all of that on you, Buck,” Tony admitted, squeezing his mismatched arms before he let go. “But I thought you should know. Maybe then it would help you see…” He shrugged a little, looking away.

_See that she loved you so much, even in death. She loved you so much, she never flirted, fell into bed or said those three little words to another person and meant it as she had said once so long ago to you. Except…she had opened herself up to me, let herself get closer to me, go so far as to kiss me with tears on her lips and nearly say those words to me._

The guilt of that, the kiss, everything he had shared with her prior to Bucky’s return began to gnaw at him anew. It’d _been_ gnawing at him for a while now but he’d buried it as best he could.

Bucky walked a few paces past Tony and sat down heavily on the-thankfully reinforced-desk and Tony turned to watch him in concern. But the man was simply staring down at his mismatched hands settled palm up in his lap.

“I-I’m glad…that you told me, Tony,” Bucky admitted after a quiet moment.

Tony didn’t know what to say to that exactly so he merely nodded and then tentatively moved to sit with a bit of space between them on his desk too.

“I wish-“ Bucky sighed and shook his head, flesh hand coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he shut his eyes.

“What do you wish, Bucky?” Tony prompted gently.

Bucky sighed deeply and it was so weary that Tony’s lungs seemed to want to mirror him in sympathy. “I wish for a lot of things,” Bucky admitted with a shake of his head, some of his hair coming loose from its bun.

“Any of them something I can help with?” Tony asked, still so gentle.

Bucky huffed and shook his head. “Not unless you got a time machine someplace I don’t know about.”

Tony huffed tiredly, conceding. “Sorry, buddy.”

Bucky smiled and lifted his gaze to look at the man beside him. Tony gave him a sort of self-deprecating smile in response.They sat in quiet for a long moment, both just looking at each other before they felt they should drop their gazes to somewhere safer.

“You think she’ll really like the dress, Tony? The pyjamas?” Bucky asked hesitantly.

“Yeah,” Tony murmured, a fond smile stretching his lips. “She’ll love them…the necklace too.”

Bucky let out a shaky breath and cast a quick glance to Tony before looking back down at his hands. “She’ll love the shoes…and the clutch you picked out for her too.”

Tony’s smile was small but utterly genuine. “I think so too,” He admitted quietly.

They fell into silence again for a long moment and then Bucky huffed softly, drawing Tony’s gaze. “What?”

He shook his head. “I’m surprised you picked something with such a high heel.”

Tony shifted and barely resisted the urge to squirm. “She wears heels all the time.”

“I’ve seen her wear them, sure,” He agreed. “But nothing that high or…that fancy.”

Tony blew out a slow breath and found himself reaching for something to hold. He picked up a screwdriver from beside him and started fiddling with it. He shrugged a bit, hoping Bucky wasn’t exactly looking too closely. “It’s a fancy dress, deserves to be worn with fancy shoes.”

It came out a tad defensively and Bucky glanced to the man out of the corner of his eye. Tony was fiddling with the screwdriver, fingers twisting and twirling the thing and Bucky’s eyebrows climbed a little higher.

“Alright,” Bucky agreed slowly, wondering what had Tony so anxious.

The genius seemed to relax at his words, however, and Bucky knew he’d picked at something sensitive there. He’d make sure to find out before too long.

“Not that we’ve come to any conclusion or anything,” Bucky sighed and Tony grimaced slightly. “But are we still okay for later?”

Tony smiled at him and nodded. “Of course we are, Bucky,” He agreed, reaching out to clasp a hand over the man’s shoulder. “Come up to my suite around 5 and we’ll get ready. Your suit’s already there, shoes and everything too.”

Bucky blew out a breath and nodded, relieved.

“When are you going to give Stevie the dress?” Tony asked him, hopping down off the desk, Bucky following suit.

“I’m going to put everything in her room while she’s showering. She’s still planning on wearing her dress blues,” He explained, shaking his head.

Tony hummed under his breath. “That’ll be a nice surprise for her. Are you going to wait around…?”

“For her to open them?” Bucky asked, Tony nodding. “No way,” He breathed, huffing a soft laugh. “I wrote a little note, put it in the box for her to find. Figure that’s good enough.”

Tony’s gaze softened and he smiled. “That sounds nice, Buck. I really don’t think you need to worry at all.”

Bucky blew out a slow breath and nodded firmly. “Thanks, Tony.”

“No trouble, Buck,” Tony shrugged and patted his friend on the back.

Bucky wasn’t really sure what to do after that and he ended up standing there a bit awkwardly, gaze flickering around the space and always coming back around to Tony. “I should go,” He eventually admitted and Tony smiled at him kindly.

“I’m not kicking you out, Bucky,” He sighed and Bucky chuckled softly.

“I know, I just-“ He shrugged lightly and reached up to rub at the back of his neck. “I know we didn’t exactly come to any resolution. I still think Stevie would be happier with you-“

“And I still think she would be happier with you,” Tony stated.

Bucky exhaled roughly and met the man’s dark brown orbs. “I don’t even think it really matters,” He said after a moment.

Tony’s brows furrowed in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

Bucky sighed, rubbing at his eyes. “Somehow, I don’t think she would risk either of our friendships. If she had to choose between one of us-“

“She’d choose you,” Tony interrupted and Bucky shook his head, huffing in annoyance.

“That’s where you’re wrong, pal. She’d never choose one of us over the other in the first place. She wouldn’t risk your friendship, nor mine,” Bucky said carefully but he was so, _so _sure of that.

Tony’s face fell then and he nodded, looking away. “You might be right.”

Bucky simply nodded and glanced towards the workshop doors, preparing himself to leave. “It’s a shame we don’t have different laws here,” He sighed.

“Hmm?” Tony murmured, thoughts drifting slightly as he turned to pick up his phone…noting the 32 missed texts, 9 phone calls and 4 voicemails; he grimaced.

“You know that thing where husbands get to take multiple wives? But it’d be multiple…I won’t say _husbands_,” He huffed, amusement clear in his voice. “But you know, a woman with multiple boyfriends or somethin’-“ He shook his head, laughing softly at himself. “Ignore me, I’m just spoutin’ nonsense.”

Tony had frozen, however, staring at his phone and ignoring everything he saw on the small screen. “It’s called polyandry, i-if you’re married.”

“What?” Bucky asked, turning to look back at Tony as the genius turned around to look at him slowly.

“It’s not legal in the marriage sense,” Tony said quietly. “Not here, but polygamy is a thing, polyamory is what uh, well it means multiple sexual relationships with all consenting parties.”

Bucky’s brows were intensely furrowed. “I’m not following…”

Tony blew out a short breath through his nose. “Polyamory is not illegal. A man or woman could be in a relationship with more than one person, so long as all adults are consenting. It-it’s not just about the sex either, love is usually a big part of it. Sometimes people just have big hearts and fall in love with more than one person.”

Bucky swallowed thickly. “P-people actually…have successful relationships like that?” He asked slowly, clearly surprised by the knowledge.

Tony nodded, swallowing hard. “Yes, it’s not common and it’s not exactly _normal_ in today’s society, but it does happen. It’s just important that all parties involved be consenting and open with one another.”

Bucky couldn’t look away. He felt trapped in Tony’s stare, the man seemingly unable to look elsewhere in that moment as well. It seemed to drag on forever.

“Does-“ Bucky swallowed heavily, trying to think of how to phrase this. “Do all-“ He wanted to say _three people. _“Do all of the partners in the relationship care for one another or do they-“ He blew out a breath. “_Share_…one person?”

“I think…” Tony said slowly, recognizing that he was treading close to very dangerous territory now. “That depends entirely on each person, what each person in that relationship wants or h-how they…_feel_…about one another. Jealousy can be an ugly thing.”

Bucky breathed out and then in, his head practically _swimming_ with the information. “And are you…a jealous person?” He forced himself to ask.

Tony’s breath stalled in his lungs. “Sometimes,” He managed to force out.

Bucky nodded. “Same goes for me.”

They were entirely silent for a long moment, both unable to look away from the other’s heated stare.

“Hypothetically?” Tony murmured and exhaled shakily as Bucky nodded in a bid for him to continue.

“Hypothetically…i-if _I_ were to…be involved…in a relationship with t-two people for example. _Hypothetically…_I would not be opposed to-“ He swallowed past the sudden lump that had lodged itself in his throat. “Getting to know…both persons…intimately.”

Bucky couldn’t help it, his cheeks pinking up with a furious blush. “Hypothetically,” Tony added and _oh,_ Tony’s eyes had somehow become darker in that confession. “Something to think about,” He offered quietly.

“_I-_“ Bucky started, unable to voice himself, to say _anything_ to that.

Because he _had_ thought about it. He’d thought about Tony in the quiet of his own mind, so very recently. He’d answered a long ago question he’d asked himself, only a few days prior. Stevie hadn’t been _wrong_ the day they’d said those words for the first time to each other. Bucky just didn’t know it then, not for certain.

She’d made the mistake of thinking that Bucky liked men and _that_ was why he was never interested in women. She’d been wrong or at least, Bucky had thought so then. Because he _had_ been interested in women, well, _one_ woman in particular. But…he’d also appreciated the sight of a man, shirtless and sweating in the afternoon sun as they lugged crates at the docks.

He swallowed past the lump in his throat and tried to respond, say _anything_ to Tony to let him know how he felt about that.

“I…hypothetically…would perhaps-“ He was stalling, he knew, didn’t mean he could help it. “Be open to that…as well.”

Tony swallowed compulsively, his throat suddenly bone dry. “_Hypothetically_,” He found himself whispering, voice entirely too hoarse.

Bucky nodded at the addition, unable to say anything more. Tony nodded as if to himself and blinked for what felt like the first time in forever, Bucky immediately following suit and breaking their staring contest. They both felt like they could breathe easier now that they weren’t looking at one another, but their chests felt tight, throats too.

“Good to know,” Tony managed to breathe, though, it sort of sounded like more of a wheeze than a proper breath.

Bucky nodded and jerked his metal thumb towards the doors. “I s-should go-“ He admitted, taking a near stumbling step towards the doors and Tony cleared his throat nodding.

“O-of course.”

Bucky swallowed thickly and nodded again, backing towards the doors slowly but surely. “I’ll s-see you at 5, T-Tony,” He breathed and Tony called out a strained affirmative as Bucky left his sights not a moment later.

“Holy fuck,” Tony whispered, practically collapsing back against his desk, knocking a pen holder over and the screwdriver he’d been playing with.

He shook his head, completely at a loss and he glanced to the nearest interface and pulled up a holographic display. He tapped into the compound’s camera system and brought up the elevator Bucky had just disappeared into.

His breath escaped him in an entirely too loud rush as he was treated to the sight of Bucky leaning heavily against the far wall of the lift, head tipped back against the metal as he just _breathed_. His chest was rising and falling quickly with each breath and Tony fumbled to turn up the speaker to let himself hear said breaths.

Tony’s breath was hitching in the next moment as he watched Bucky’s metal hand…slide down to grip himself through his jeans. Bucky’s grunt was picked up on the microphone and it was so _gorgeous_ and Tony let out a noise akin to a whimper as he watched the man’s eyes flutter slightly, his teeth sinking into that plush lower lip as he palmed himself roughly.

“_Oh my God_,” Tony muttered. “J-Jarvis, blackout the workshop,” He ordered and no sooner had he done so did Tony shove a hand down his pants, hastily have undone the button and fly.

He watched as Bucky continued to palm himself in the elevator, unbeknownst to him that Tony was pleasuring himself to the sight of him. _Christ_, but that was wrong and dirty and-he swore under his breath and closed out the feed as the elevator stopped at their floor and the brunet disappeared out the doors, hand no longer pressed against his cock.

“You’re so fucked, Tony,” He muttered and sank back against the desk, rucking up his t-shirt as he tried to kick off his pants a bit more.

He managed to get them completely off one leg, shoes no where to be found _again_ today and then he was reaching blindly for the desk drawer. When he came back with his emergency bottle of lube, he groaned as he poured some of the slippery substance over two of his fingers, doing his best to coat them liberally.

He bypassed his cock as he capped the lube and dropped it at his side and then he was pressing those two fingers between his cheeks, free hand reaching down and beneath him to spread them even more. He moaned at the first brush of slick fingertips circling his rim and then carefully started pressing one inside.

It’d been so _long_ since he’d touched himself like this. He was tight, far tighter than he ever remembered, so worked up and unable to relax. He groaned and tried to will his body to settle, to let him in and soon he had one finger sheathed entirely within him, feet planted on the edge of the desk, hips rising slightly so he could slip farther inside.

His free hand snapped down to grasp the base of his cock as he worked the second finger inside, his walls clutching at the digits and impossibly hot, _tight._ He moaned at the first brush against his prostate and couldn’t help giving his cock a firm couple of tugs to take the edge off. His breathing was laboured and he struggled to get his heart to calm. It just felt so _good._

His eyes drifted shut and he let himself sink into the fantasy he’d started spinning for himself. Bucky standing over him, smirking and working slick digits in and out of his body, making Tony grunt and moan, _whine_ for more. Calling him _doll_, _sweet thing _and telling him _how good_ he was being.

The hand on his cock sped up at the thought of the praise and he moaned long and low as he felt the heat in his belly rising. He tipped his head to the side, panting into he quiet air of the shop and then he caught sight of one of the dozen or so photographs he had sitting up on a shelf. His gaze fell to a photo of Stevie, her smile cheeky, her nose scrunched up adorably as she looked at Tony who was rolling his eyes so hard only the whites were visible.

Clint had taken the stupid picture and it was still to this day, one of Tony’s favourites.

He moaned softly, his eyes drifting shut at the sight of her pretty face, his fingertips tripping over his prostate again. He let himself imagine Stevie there with him too, while Bucky’s fingers opened him up, she would climb up over him, spread her thighs on either side of his head and she’d ride his face until he made her come, making a mess of his face, her slick seeping into his goatee and making a right mess of him.

He grunted at the thought of her above him as jerked his cock faster, uncaring that it was a little dry. His wrist was tiring between his legs but he was so worked up and knew it wouldn’t take much to send him over that edge. He groaned out Stevie’s name so softly in the next moment and hissed Bucky’s name through clenched teeth as he stroked insistently at his swollen prostate, his cock twitching, pre-come slicking the way and then he was coming with a bitten off shout.

He whined through his teeth as his orgasm rushed through him, his body taught, muscles tensing and releasing as he arched, hips lifting from the desktop as he rode out the wave after wave of pleasure. He was panting through the aftershocks, body trembling as he slumped back onto the desk. “_Fuck-_“ He gasped, feeling winded and sex-drunk.

He laughed, the sound bright, _startled_ from him and he licked his dry lips, breathing out roughly a couple of times in an attempt to calm down. His body was soft and loose limbed as he finally managed to sit up after a couple of minutes. He belly was covered in his come, sticking to his hair and he groaned softly as he reached for a couple of tissues to try and clean himself up.

He made his way into the workshop bathroom not a minute later, ignoring the slight wobble of his legs as he dragged himself to wash his hands and pull up his pants. His gaze landed on his reflection in the mirror above the sink and he exhaled shakily at what he saw there.

“Well, don’t you look fucked,” He huffed, a snarky twist to his lips as he attempted to smooth down some of his mussed up hair and adjust his shirt.

He rolled his eyes at himself and left the bathroom, slumping heavily down onto the sofa in the shop. His eyes fell to the edge of the blanket he could see pinned behind his shoulder and he pulled it off the back of the couch and held it against his chest, not bothering to unfold it.

He stayed there for a long while, thinking, dozing, drifting in fantasies and thoughts of _what _if’s and it was making that little bud of hope Bucky had planted start to bloom. He wondered if he’d have to snip it or if he was safe to feed it for a while longer. His lashes fluttered as he let himself drift, thoughts of Stevie and Bucky filling his mind.

_Would Stevie want that? Would Stevie be okay with loving us both…with Bucky and I getting to know one another and loving her in turn?_

He was asleep before he’d even begun to take all of that apart.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been sitting on this chapter for a while, finally just finished the last little bit and did a quick edit. Hope you like it. <3 Sorry for not being more active lately. I've been dealing with some severe mental health issues, carpal tunnel in my dominant hand and being overwhelmed with making plans for renovations for my fiancé to move in with me next month. I hope everyone is staying healthy and safe.

“How’s it coming along in there?” Tony called out, half concentrating on the text conversation he was currently having with Pepper, half trying not to freak out about the fact that Bucky was busy getting _naked_ in his _bedroom._

He shifted in his spot on the sofa, blowing out a breath as he pulled one foot up to rest his ankle on the opposite thigh, left arm already stretched out along the back of the couch. He was aiming for comfortable casualness because he honestly had no idea what to expect when Bucky would finally step out.

“It’s uh-just another minute,” Bucky called back and Tony huffed quietly in amusement, typing out a quick message to Pep to let her know they’d be on their way shortly.

The sound of the bedroom door opening had Tony looking up from the screen not a minute later, absently pocketing his phone to properly give the man his full attention. He was entirely unprepared to become witness to James Buchanan Barnes in all his handsome glory, however. He looked...he looked _good_ and that was entirely too reserved a statement.

“Wow,” Tony said quietly, more of a rush of air than any actual _word._

Bucky blinked, coming to a stop just at the edge of the living room and taking in Tony’s expression with nervous curiosity. “H-how do I look?” He asked aloud, tone bordering on shy, _self conscious_, Tony’s mind screamed.

“You look great, like..._really_ great,” Tony assured him and he _did_.

Tony didn’t have to lie about that. Bucky’s shoulders relaxed a fraction at his words and he looked down at himself and the gorgeous suit Tony had made for him. The fabric was rich, far more luxe than he’d ever dreamt of wearing, let alone _owning_. It wasn’t a black tie event, so the designer had helped Bucky choose a dark grey suit with a slight sheen. It was ridiculously comfortable and fit him exceptionally well. Every piece had been tailored especially for him.

He stretched out both of his arms as he continued to look over himself and Tony watched as he tugged lightly on the cuff of the powder blue sleeve that was playing peekaboo at his wrist. He was even wearing the cuff links Tony left out for him. He maybe sorta thrilled a bit at the idea that Bucky was wearing something of _his_. He tried and failed to suppress a shiver at the thought.

“It’s far more comfortable than I expected,” Bucky admitted quietly, a nervous tilt to his lips as he adjusted his lapel and then buttoned the blazer closed and Tony resisted the urge to get up and go and adjust his navy blue tie at the sight.

At first glance the tie looked nearly black, but there was a blue sheen to it that had instantly drawn Bucky’s eyes and Tony thought it was a perfect choice. Tony tipped his chin up then and motioned to where his own tie was done up. “You might want to adjust that a bit.”

Bucky _hmm_’d and tipped his chin up, reaching for the knot in question and Tony watched as he gently nudged it back into place with careful metal fingers. Tony tried _very_ hard not to lick his lips at the sight of Bucky’s throat bared to him and instead glanced down the length of the man while he had the opportunity. _God_, but he was gorgeous.

“Thanks, so, you really think I look okay?” Bucky asked and Tony watched as he gently ran his flesh hand over his carefully styled hair, smoothing down invisible flyaways.

Tony was endeared. “Fishing for compliments? _Tsk_,” He teased and Bucky laughed softly, his cheeks warming and he hoped his slight stubble would hide it well enough.

“Just nervous is all, been a long time since I had to dress up to impress,” He admitted and Tony’s gaze softened as he rose from his seat and came to stand before the man.

“I really don’t think you need to impress anyone, Buck. You look great besides,” Tony admitted, motioning for Bucky to follow him as he headed for the door.

However, as he walked by the man, Tony paused, inhaling a bit deeper at the first hint of something rather familiar. Bucky caught the action and now he was _really_ blushing. “A-are-are you wearing my cologne?”

Bucky swallowed thickly and tried to ignore the way his throat clicked. “Uh, yeah. I saw you had a couple laid out...thought you wouldn’t mind-“

“I don’t,” Tony blurted, surprising himself at the urgency to _tell him that_.

Bucky cleared his throat lightly and nodded, trying to will his blush to calm. “T-thanks,” He stammered and Tony took an extra moment to flick his gaze over the man in a sort of appraising once over. From this close, Tony could really see just how steely-blue his eyes were. They reminded him of a rising storm.

Bucky tried not to squirm...or flex, under the attention. He really wanted to flex. _Ugh, you are such a dude. _He tried not to laugh at himself and instead flashed the genius a smile.

“You ready?” Tony asked, interrupting his thoughts.

“Yeah,” Bucky breathed and when Tony merely looked at him for another moment and then nodded, Bucky was helpless not to let his gaze sweep along his strong shoulders, the expanse of the man’s back and down further to the curve of his ass as he turned away from him.

_Oh_, but Tony had a perfect ass. Bucky bit his lip and let himself follow the man out of his suite.

“You’re lucky you managed to get Stevie to put your hair up for you before you left,” Tony chuckled, heading for the elevators.

The Maria Stark Foundation’s Gala was on site this year, Tony insisting they hold it here now that they had a proper space to host such functions. Pepper hadn’t disagreed and besides, it made actually getting _all_ of the Team together that much more likely.

Bucky huffed and followed. “Yeah, had to ask her when she came back from her workout.”

“What’d you tell her?” Tony queried, stepping into the waiting elevator, Bucky in tow.

“Told her I was going to head to your floor to get ready, ’cause you had my suit and insisted on having a couple‘a drinks together before we headed to the gala. Then I told her we’d just meet her there,” Bucky explained and Tony hummed, watching as Bucky let himself lean back against the brushed metal of the lift.

Tony kept letting himself look...and Bucky was having a hard time _not _looking. They both really needed to be careful, because dress pants really didn’t do much to hide any unforeseen situations that-_coughs_-may arise.

“Fair enough, not like we _didn’t_ have a drink before we got ready,” Tony admitted, Bucky humming in agreement.

When Bucky had shown up at his door with a tentative smile lighting up that gorgeously handsome face, his long dark hair pulled back into a perfect half bun, the strands falling in loose waves about his shoulders, a few framing his face; Tony had almost bitten his cheek to keep from groaning. He was beautiful on any given day, truly, but after this morning, Tony worried that things might be awkward. And they were, for a few minutes and then Tony had gone to get them both a couple of drinks and Bucky had relaxed on the sofa and things were virtually back to normal for the men.

Well, except for the lingering gazes on both their parts. Tony knew he’d put himself out there this morning, but it had worked. Even if they had been talking in the _hypothetical sense_, there was no way Bucky had misinterpreted his words and Tony was pretty damn sure that he hadn’t misinterpreted Bucky’s.

Tony knew he’d approach Bucky about it eventually, they’d hopefully have a real conversation about it and then maybe-just maybe-they could work up some kind of plan to talk to Stevie. See if they could bring her around to the idea. _God_, but Tony hoped so.

“Is anyone meeting her at the apartment to walk her down?” Tony asked after a beat, Bucky taking a step out of the elevator when they’d arrived at their destined floor, Tony falling into step beside him.

“Not that I’m aware of, no. She mentioned that Sam was meeting up with Nat and Clint. I think Peter was already with Ned and MJ.”

“Mhm, I extended an invite to them and if anyone asks, Peter’s my intern. Working with Tony Stark has its perks,” Tony chuckled and Bucky smiled, swiping his tongue over his bottom lip in thought.

“Bruce is around, so I’m sure Thor will find him and drag him along,” Tony added and Bucky shook his head lightly.

“The most unlikely of friends, aren’t they?” Bucky marvelled and Tony snickered under his breath.

“Tell me about it. They’re an odd pair but I think they have fun together.”

Bucky hummed softly. “I haven’t met his brother yet, Loki?”

Tony sighed and shook his head. “Yeah, not that we don’t _want_ you to meet him, but he can be a bit of a troublemaker. _God of Mischief_ and all.”

Bucky nodded, brows furrowing in concern. “I know Stevie said that he isn’t exactly the most pleasant person to deal with.”

Tony outright laughed, grinning over at the man as they turned down another hallway, nearing the gala. “That’s the understatement of the century. He means well..._sometimes_, but he can be quick to judge and quick to anger. He’s a manipulative little shit but Thor loves him and we’ve all gotten used to him so we’re relatively comfortable around him now.”

“_Right,_” Bucky agreed, sighing softly. “_Gods_, _Aliens and _Men, it’s crazy what exists in the future.”

Tony smiled wryly, his lips twisting in a half grimace. “Some kind of crazy,” He agreed, gaze slipping down to where Bucky had slipped his metal hand from his pocket to reach for the door they’d arrived at, a secure back entrance of sorts.

Bucky hummed and Tony was pleased to note that Bucky didn’t have a glove on him to hide the hand if he felt so inclined. He didn’t even move to put the hand into his pocket to keep it hidden. Tony gave him a reassuring smile as they caught sight of Pepper directing a few wait staff down the hall.

“Glad you’re here with us,” Tony admitted, reaching up and patting Bucky lightly on his flesh and blood shoulder, squeezing gently.

Bucky could only nod, a warm smile lighting up his entire face and Tony tried not to find his gorgeous smile so endearing and obviously failed. How this man could smile after everything he’d been through...it was beyond him. He’d forever be grateful to know this man, even if they only ever remained friends.

.

Stevie was chewing her bottom lip so aggressively, the skin was starting to peel and split. She groaned loudly and forced herself to stop, knowing that it would heal within moments if she could stop herself long enough for it to even have a _chance_.

“You are seriously overthinking this,” She scolded, nearly _glaring_ at her reflection in the mirror on her closet door.

Her gaze flickered over her shoulder and she blew out a slow and controlled breath as it fell to the powder blue dress laid out over her bed.

She’d stepped out of the shower and come back into her room to get dressed and she’d found...well, she’d found a lot of things. None of which had she ever expected. But that was Bucky for you. He surprised her again and again and it never got old.

She’d opened the largest box first and found the note Bucky had left for her...and then she’d seen the dress.

_Stevie,_

_ You entrusted me with something very precious to you and I wanted you to know that your trust is something I value above all else. Your faith in me is everything, Stevie. I know you didn’t really want to give up your mother’s dress and truly, you shouldn’t have to. I know it makes you sad to see it but I hope that you can find some happiness in this. You said it saddened you to see it in such a time where she could never be, but maybe you can still carry a piece of her with you. Even if it is so small a thing._

_ P.S. Tony picked out the shoes...and the clutch. He was an incredible help in making this possible._

_ P.P.S. I’ll see you at the gala, Stevie. I hope you’ll wear this and think of Sarah. She would be so proud of you, Stevie. Never doubt that. She loved you more than anything._

_ ~ Bucky_

Stevie was in tears by the time she’d fished reading the note. She had no idea what to expect when she set the note aside and carefully pulled back the tissue, but it certainly hadn’t been this. A dress so beautiful, so delicate and the most gorgeous shade of blue she’d ever seen. It was a powder blue but that didn’t even begin to cover it. It was soft in tone and made of what she knew to be satin. It caught the light above her as she carefully pulled it free of its tissue and found herself gasping at the sight as it unfolded nearly to the floor.

It was long and beautiful, light and airy and she knew it would hug her every curve and drape from her frame in the most alluring way. The fabric was like nothing she’d ever seen before and though it looked thin, she could tell that it had weight and structure beneath it.

She lifted it carefully by the sleeves, barely sleeves at all, really. It was a low _v_ neck with perhaps four fingers width of fabric for the sleeves as it would surely come up over her shoulders in such a regal cut. She turned it and her breathing hitched when she caught sight of the mirrored _v_ there as well. The back was cut impossibly low and she wondered at how the garment could possibly remain in place if she were to so much as _breathe_.

As she lifted it a bit more, a small card fluttered to the floor. She laid the dress out reverently upon the bedding and bent to pick it up, clad in nothing but her bathrobe, for the moment.

_Captain Rogers,_

_ This garment comes to you with some very important notes. We understand the importance of the dress James has sent to us and we have done all that we can to include every piece within your gown and the other items enclosed. You will notice on the inside of the dress in four places, that there are carefully placed decorative-_

Stevie brought the note with her as she attempted to look inside to peek at what they looked like. The first one she saw lie in the _v_ at the front of the dress. It looked like a heart.

_-hearts that are made of fabric from your mother’s dress. They will not show through when you wear it, but we are certain you will know they are there all the same._

Stevie sat down heavily on the edge of the bed, letting out a shaky sob as more tears fell.

_In memory of your mother, we have designed you this dress in her honour. We have named it Sarah and hopeyou find it to your tastes. There are two other garments enclosed and we have done something similar with the fabric given to us. The blue was handpicked by James as he wanted to make sure it was as close to the original as possible._

_ We thank you, Captain Rogers and hope these gifts find you well._

There was no name on the card, but when she flipped it over, she instantly recognized the logo on the back as belonging to the designer _Chanel._ She wiped at her eyes, the tears still falling lightly and wetting her cheeks.

It’d taken her some time to be able to collect herself before she attempted to open the other boxes. Thankfully, they weren’t nearly as heart-wrenching as the first.

In the bottom of the box with the dress, she found two more garments. One was what appeared to be a pair of silk blue shorts with a small strip of only slightly darker blue fabric for the drawstring. She knew it had been a part of her mother’s dress as well. The second garment was a matching tank top with thin straps, also pieces of her mother’s dress. There was a braided strip of shimmery material woven in alongside it and she found the top to be lined across the neckline and the hem of the shorts as well.

It was beautiful and soft and when she peeked inside both items, she found more of those carefully stitched hearts beneath the fabric in various places.

She let herself cry a little more.

That left her with two more boxes to open. She opened the larger of the two and found a striking pair of stilettos in a dark blue satin. They were simple and yet much more elegant than anything she currently had in her closet and she found herself ghosting light fingertips along the rich blue material.

Her gaze flickered to the other contents in the box and she gently pulled free a small matching blue clutch. It looked like an envelope with elegant stitching in black and silver and was perhaps twice the size of her StarkPhone. There was a thin metal chain that she could use in lieu of simply holding it and the metal was brushed black.

She exhaled shakily and let herself look over the items as she laid them out next to the dress. It would all look beautiful together, surely. She simply could not fathom the wealth of these items. She would forever treasure them, she knew.

Her gaze had fallen to the smallest box. It, however, had not been left on her bed, but on her nightstand instead. She could not bear to open it yet, nor could she bring herself to read the small folded note settled beside it.

Which brings her back to herself now, staring at her reflection in the mirror, clad in only a thin silk blue bodysuit. She knew it would remain entirely hidden beneath the dress, even with its low back and the _v_ at its front. The straps would remain hidden beneath the dress easily as well.

Her gaze caught on the dress once more and she swallowed past the sudden lump in her throat. Was she really going to wear such a revealing gown to the gala? She’d _never_ worn anything but her army blues to large functions. They always expected her to be _Captain America_ and so she’d thought it important to dress the part.

She didn’t _need_ to dress like that though, not all the time, but despite knowing this, more often than not, her uniform was safer. At some smaller meetings and events she felt comfortable enough to wear dress pants and a nice set of heels and blouse. She’d just…not worn a dress in…well, in forever, really.

But _Bucky_ had done this for her and Tony had helped him and that was…

She breathed deeply and turned her gaze back to the mirror as she carefully adjusted her hair. She’d pulled strands to the back and pinned it partially up before she’d fashioned a fishtail braid down the centre. It was simple and out of her face. Her curls could really be a nuisance at times but she still loved them and so did Bucky.

“This shouldn’t be so hard,” She mumbled quietly to herself as she turned to look at where the dress lay atop her covers.

_You’ll look beautiful for them_.

The errant thought made her blush and she glanced away from the dress. She’d imagined the voice that had taken on that thought had sounded an awful lot like her mother’s lilting voice.

_They’d be so happy to see you in something they worked together on. Don’t you think?_

Stevie swallowed hard and nodded lightly to herself. She knew it to be true.

She wrapped her arms loosely around her middle and took a step closer to the bed. “You’d enjoy the attention,” She murmured. “You know what it does to you, how it makes you feel.”

She shivered lightly at the thought and ignored the rising goosebumps racing up her arms as she reached out to trail careful fingertips along the hip of the dress, where she knew another heart lay beneath.

_Imagine what they will think of you, how beautiful they find you, how gorgeous and strong._ _Imagine what others will see when you wear it, Stevie._ _They’ll think you gorgeous but they will never have you, because your beauty, your strength, your love…is only meant for them_.

Stevie drew her lower lip between her teeth and nodded slowly to herself, blue eyes having fallen shut from one moment to the next. She thought about how Tony had made her feel that very first time he’d found her dressed in lingerie. She’d felt shy, nervous, but when she’d grown more comfortable…she felt bold, confident and _powerful_.

She knew that’s how she would feel walking into the room with so many eyes on her. She did this for them, but not only them. She knew she would do this for herself as well, her mother too. Her mother was brave and beautiful. She could be too.

She carefully picked up the gown and went towards her mirror once more and as she drew it over her frame and let it fall about her hips, she found herself gasping at the barely-there touch of the luxurious material against her sensitive skin. It felt wonderful, sensual and freeing in all the right ways and upon shifting and trailing her gaze down the length of her body, she knew that no one would know she even wore anything beneath it.

Perhaps they would think she wore nothing at all.

She let herself linger for another moment, her body near trembling with the desire to move to do _something_ right then. It was a buzzing beneath her skin and the energy needed to go _somewhere_. She turned from the mirror and made her way back to the bed where she sat at its edge to slip into the heels Tony had chosen for her.

They were high and perhaps _these_ were her new pair of highest heels. She found herself smiling at the thought.

She stood and picked up the clutch and carefully slipped her lipstick-after she applied it, _again_-into the pocket and then grabbed the little pocket mirror Natasha had given her for her last birthday and put that inside too. Natasha had said it had come all the way from Russia and the brushed silver leaves on the back were wonderfully intricate.

Just as she turned towards the door, her eyes alighted on the small box at her bedside.

She’d nearly forgotten.

Quietly, she walked towards it, only the sound of her light breaths and her heels on the hardwood filling her ears. She stared at the folded note for a long moment before picking it up with tentative fingertips. It read simply:

_You are my chosen universe._

_Thank you, Stevie._

_~ Bucky_

She exhaled shakily and set the note down back where she’d found it and with shaking fingers, she picked up the box.

Inside was a necklace with what appeared to be a delicate white gold chain and upon it lay a floating solitaire diamond surrounded by a thin circle of more white gold. As she pulled it from the box with careful fingers, she watched as the diamond seemed to flutter within. It was so _pretty_, dainty and elegant. She’d never seen such a beautifully crafted piece of jewelry.

She set the box down absently and found herself admiring the stone as light caught it and made it sparkle impossibly more so. She’d never seen a more perfect stone.

She tentatively unclasped it and drew it around her neck before linking it shut. After she’d made it settle properly she found herself reaching up and gently touched the stone with warm fingertips. Her lashes fluttered as she thought about Bucky picking something so beautiful out for her. She wondered if he’d called it _pretty_ like she had. She wondered if she would get to hear him call _her_ pretty again.

She inhaled shakily and turned back to the door of her bedroom. She was to meet him there and she knew that Tony would be with him. The very idea that they had worked together on the gifts she’d received positively melted her heart and made it burn all the more for them both. She had no idea what to do with the information, but she treasured it nevertheless as she made her way out of the apartment and headed towards the gala.

She couldn’t wait to see them, to thank them.

.

It was _loud._ Was Bucky’s first reaction. There were _a lot_ of people. Was his second.

The ballroom and that’s truly what it was, could easily accommodate 400 people, though Tony had said there was only about half of that here tonight. It didn’t feel crowded, not exactly, but it was difficult to feel entirely comfortable surrounded by so many unfamiliar people. It did help, however, that Bucky actually knew a few of them. But he was still entirely too nervous for his liking.

Tony had left him near the bar assuring him that Natasha and Clint would find him before long. Meanwhile, Tony went to walk around and mingle with the guests. Pepper was at his elbow looking immaculate as ever and was in the process of introducing him to those she deemed necessary and Bucky was not at all envious of his status amongst some of the absurdly wealthy bunch. At least they were all there for a good cause.

Sure enough, Bucky had been by the bar for no more than three-minutes before Natasha, Clint and Sam approached with grins on their faces as they took in the sight of Bucky in a damned _suit._

“Well, don’t you clean up nice,” Natasha teased lightly, moving to press her back against the bar’s edge, surveying the room in its entirety.

Bucky watched as she pushed her dark red hair over her shoulder casually, her sharp eyes flickering around the space, no doubt taking in any potential threats or problematic guests. “Thanks,” He found himself saying gruffly, barely resisting the urge to run a hand self-consciously down the front of his suit.

“What’s the matter?” Clint asked him, leaning against the counter and trying to flag down one of the bartenders.

Bucky shrugged lightly and let his gaze slip to where Sam had come to stand in front of him, the man smiling at him warmly. “Too many people, yeah?”

Bucky snorted and nodded, scratching absently at his scruff as he complained. “It’s too loud.”

Sam laughed lightly while Natasha gave him a quick grin and Clint huffed in amusement before turning his attention over to the bartender as he arrived. He ordered a round of drinks for the four and soon they were all cradling various glasses of wine, champagne and beer.

“Believe it or not, you do get used to it,” Clint told him, handing Bucky a glass of champagne.

“I’m not so sure about that,” He mumbled into his glass of bubbly.

The others shot him sympathetic smiles and they picked up various conversations from nearby patrons. Bucky was pleased to note that the three seemed intent on keeping him company and distracting him with making fun of some of the guests, letting him in on all their dirty secrets.

Bucky thought this was far more exciting than Tony’s _mingling_. Though, he supposed that was sort of a necessary evil. Regardless, the four continued to chat, sipping at their drinks and really, just keeping Bucky company. He definitely appreciated it. They were good people.

About twenty-minutes later Tony found his way back to Bucky and the rest of the group, Peter, Ned and MJ in tow. They chatted for a while, Ned far too interested and enthusiastic about Bucky’s new arm. He supposed Peter had rambled on about it to some extent already so he was forced to at least let the kid check it out a bit. He maybe preened just a smidge under the attention, no where near Tony’s level of course.

Once the three had disappeared into the crowd, Tony sidled up next to Bucky and winked at the man as he leaned over the bar and waved the bartender down for a glass of scotch.

“How are you holdin’ up?” Tony asked, lifting his drink from the bar top and taking a long sip.

Bucky cleared his throat slightly and watched as Tony shifted to lean back against the bar beside him, gaze flickering out over the crowd. “Oh, you know-“ He waved the metal hand as if that explained everything he was feeling.

Tony chuckled, his dark brown eyes crinkling at the corners as he swept his gaze back out over the room. “Any sign of her?”

Bucky huffed. “Not yet, I think we’d know the second she stepped foot inside the room.”

Tony smiled down into his glass, gently swirling it in his grasp. “You’re right about that.”

Bucky didn’t bother to fight his own smile and soon found himself drawn into conversation with Sam, Clint and Natasha wandering away when they caught sight of Maria and Fury and Bucky was relieved that he wouldn’t have to talk to the pair just yet. Tony had said so.

Bucky also wasn’t very inclined to leave the safety of the bar but it was getting more crowded there, despite there being two other bars in the space. Tony motioned over to a couple of higher tables near one of the corners of the big room. It was just enough out of the way that Bucky didn’t feel so claustrophobic and he smiled gratefully at Tony when the man let him take up the farthermost table, that way he could see the room in its entirety.

“Feel better?”

“_Much,_” He admitted, sighing deeply.

Tony shot him a sympathetic smile and patted him on the shoulder. “Why don’t you help yourself to some of the_ hors d’oeuvres_,” He suggested. “And I’ll go back to shaking hands for a bit.”

Bucky huffed but he nodded. Tony was a popular man. “Sounds good, Tony. Let me uh, know if you happen to-“

“Don’t worry, I don’t think you’ll need me to tell you when she arrives,” Tony teased, his smile playful and knowing.

Bucky blew out a slow breath and nodded, smiling down into his near empty glass of champagne. “Have fun,” Tony called over his shoulder, already disappearing into the crowd and getting swept up in conversation once more.

“Fun, _right,_” Bucky chuckled to himself, gaze having tracked the man back into the crowd.

He tried to relax and his eyes fell to where he could see Sam speaking to another man in military dress. He looked vaguely familiar but Bucky couldn’t quite place him right then. He didn’t let his gaze linger on them and instead allowed himself to settle back into the noise around him.

There was music at least, something melodic and entirely instrumental. Bucky would have thought he’d find it a touch pretentious but he actually rather enjoyed it. His eyes tracked around the room until they landed on the source of music and was pleased to find a live band with several familiar instruments performing on a raised platform.

The notes of the piano were sweet and drew him in easily, but it was the violin that made his heart yearn for something he didn’t quite understand. It was beautiful, truly and he let himself relax into the calming notes of the music instead of the droning voices around him, the clinking of stemware and overall _noise_ of the space.

A server approached him carrying a tray of champagne filled flutes and Bucky smiled and nodded, murmuring his thanks when the young man took his glass for him and gave him a full one. He was rather enjoying the champagne. He’d expected it to be sweet and cloying but it was actually quite dry and the effervescence was a welcome change from what he was used to.

“Must be expensive,” He murmured to himself, hiding his chuckle behind another sip.

He sank back into the sounds of the band and let his gaze seek out the others, finding them one by one, even Bruce and Thor had arrived now. He wondered how much longer he’d have to waitbefore Stevie joined them. He was already nervous enough as it is, he couldn’t imagine how he was going to _actually_ fair once he caught sight of her.

He exhaled sharply through his nose as he tried to will away the thought. Everything would be fine. Tony had been so sure of that, Bucky could surely trust his judgement, couldn’t he? He’d barely had a moment to contemplate that, however, before a murmur started to filter through the crowd, the rest of the noise filling the space falling exponentially.

Bucky didn’t need to see to know that Stevie had just entered the room. He felt his heart begin to pound within his chest, his palms grow clammy with sweat and his breath stall entirely in his lungs. He found himself actively seeking out Tony in the crowd and sure enough, he found the genius staring back at him with a much too knowing smile tugging at his lips. Bucky couldn’t resist smiling back, despite the nerves.

.

Stevie breathed in deeply, the scent of the light perfume she’d adorned herself with grounding her as she walked into the ballroom. She could feel so many eyes on her and she forced down the blush and slew of butterflies that were threatening to overwhelm her as she kept her head up. She’d found herself wanting to duck her chin, feeling shy but she couldn’t do that. She could be brave, she could be confident.

She _was_ confident by nature, perhaps just not with her appearance. She’d struggled with it all her life, no matter the body she’d been in. Bucky calling her _pretty_ had most certainly helped and the knowledge that _Tony _thought she was beautiful didn’t cease to do the same.

She let that thought calm her as she passed over the threshold of the ballroom. She could hear the chorus of murmurs as she entered and she willed her racing heart to calm as she smiled kindly at a few guests as she passed them by. She recognized some faces, but certainly not all. This particular gala always had a familiarity to it, however. These people had been around and supported the Starks for a very long time and that included Tony. So it was only natural they attend every year.

Stevie was surprised, though, when she caught sight of Colonel Rhodes. She had not heard he had made it in for the gala in time. She found herself smiling more genuinely as she approached the familiar face and couldn’t help chuckling softly when she realized that Sam was standing beside him. Of course they would find one another.

“_Captain_,” James greeted, voice awed and Stevie’s gaze softened, along with her smile as she came to stand before him.

“_Colonel,_ how many times do I have to tell you to call me Stevie?” She sighed and James laughed lightly. “Sam,” She greeted, gaze flickering to her friend only to find him looking at her with highly raised eyebrows and wide dark eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“You’re wearing a dress,” Sam blurted, ever the tactful one and Stevie found herself laughing lightly.

“_Wilson_-“ James spluttered, elbowing the man in the side and making Sam nearly spill his drink.

“_Sorry!_” He apologized, spluttering a laugh of his own. “It’s just-“

“I think you look beautiful, Stevie,” James admitted, interrupting Sam and she knew he was being genuine, that lovely sparkle in his eyes making her cheeks warm at his words.

“Thank you, James,” She whispered, raising a brow at Sam as he shook his head.

“I don’t think beautiful even begins to cover what you are, Stevie,” Sam admitted, smiling and shaking his head a bit ruefully.

Stevie huffed a soft laugh and rolled her eyes. “I know you think I’m a bucket of sass most days-“

Sam laughed while James guffawed, eyes flickering between the pair. “Can’t you ever just take a compliment?” Sam sighed, all put upon and Stevie blushed lightly, shrugging her shoulder demurely.

“No way, teasing you is more fun,” She admitted and the two men laughed.

She let herself be drawn into conversation with the pair for another minute or so as she let the murmurs settle over her, let the noise and the atmosphere around her filter in. She focused on her breathing as her gaze flickered around the space, over her friends’ shoulders but she still hadn’t caught sight of the others...nor Bucky and Tony.

“Would you like a glass of champagne, Captain Rogers?” A server asked her and Stevie turned and smiled at the young man, accepting the glass of bubbly and thanking him quietly.

When she turned back to her friends, however, she found them making an odd sort of _can you believe it_ face at one another. She wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it. The moment passed quickly, when in the next moment Clint and Natasha had found their way over to them.

“_Wow-_“ Clint blurted and Stevie raised a brow at him and only _just_ managed to keep from putting a hand on her hip and cocking it; guess despite the gown she was still feeling like her usual self.

She was very pleased to note this.

“You have no chill,” Natasha sighed at her partner, smiling pleasantly at Stevie as they came to stand with them. “You look lovely, Stevie,” Natasha greeted.

“Thank you, Nat and so do you. Red is still your colour,” She admitted, her eyes crinkling with the force of her smile as she let her gaze flicker over the red-head’s frame.

Natasha always wore a red dress to events, or a black one if she was trying to blend in. Today she’d felt like going for flashy so she’d chosen a shorter number with an impossibly high slit over her right thigh and Stevie took a moment to note that it was far more risqué than the slit she sported on her right side. Her dress was a deep wine red and clung to her every curve in a way that was both intimidating and hot as hell. Stevie appreciated it. Natasha was beautiful.

“Thank you, Stevie. Though I don’t think mine is quite as special as yours,” She admitted, gaze flickering down to where Stevie had crossed her right hand over her middle and was lightly caressing her opposite hip.

Natasha had known of the dress because _hello_, it was Natasha and she understood the gown’s importance before she’d even seen her friend wearing it.

Stevie’s eyes crinkled at the comment and she smiled, barely resisting ducking her head as she turned her gaze away to where Clint was saying hello to James, Sam quietly watching the women with a smile of his own. “Yes, well...I suppose I should try and find the pair to thank for making it happen,” She murmured, reaching up absently to caress over the diamond settled in the hollow of her throat.

Natasha held the eyebrow she wished to raise at the sight in check, Sam, however, did not. They were both grateful she hadn’t noticed as she turned back to James when he called for her. “Tony should be around here someplace, he hasn’t seen me yet but he called me yesterday and told me about your friend, Barnes? I’ve heard a lot about him and I’m very eager to meet him.”

“_Oh,_” Stevie breathed. “I’m sure he’s here someplace too,” She explained, feeling those angry butterflies begin to stir.

“He was by the bar for a while with us earlier,” Sam admitted, glancing to the bar in question.

“I think Tony went to find a quieter place for Bucky,” Natasha admitted and Stevie’s brows furrowed in concern.

“Is he alright?” She asked worriedly.

“He’s fine,” Sam assured. “He was just a little uncomfortable being around so many people.”

“It’s rather loud in here too,” Clint added. “He’s probably-“

“_Oh! _There he is,” Sam said, catching sight of the man in question.

Stevie’s heart felt as if it had leapt into her throat and she forced herself to take a deeper breath in as she turned to where Sam and the others were now looking. She was wholly unprepared for the sight of James Buchanan Barnes in a _suit_.

“_Oh wow-_“ Escaped her before she’d thought to hide her surprise.

She felt the blood rush to her cheeks instantaneously and soon she felt the warmth spreading down her throat and _oh God,_ she really hoped it wasn’t as noticeable as it felt. Wishful thinking on her part.

Bucky in a suit was something else entirely. She’d known of course, that Tony had helped him get fitted for one and Bucky had come back from the fitting with a tentative smile on his face and kind words about the tailor who had promised to make something _very smart_ for him. Stevie had been all smiles while listening to her friend then, but she truly hadn’t _thought_ about how Bucky would _look_ in such a well tailored suit.

Stevie was interrupted in her thoughts not a moment later as Bucky met her gaze...and then his grey-blue orbs were sweeping over her frame. She didn’t know what to make of the expression he wore then, especially not when he met and held her gaze with such burning intensity just then.

“_Bucky_-“ She said in surprise, voice nothing but a faint breath of air as he stepped up beside her.

“Hi, Stevie,” He greeted, voice demure and Stevie’s entire demeanour _melted_ at the sound.

“You look very handsome in your suit,” She found herself telling him and was delighted when Bucky’s cheeks seemed to warm and the corners of his eyes crinkled with the force of his smile.

A smile so big and so beautiful and _oh_, but she wanted to kiss him more than anything.

“I ain’t got nothin’ on you, pretty,” He whispered and Stevie’s heart _ached _at the words, a sudden heat gathering behind her eyes.

She willed it down and quickly ducked her head, unable to keep holding that intent gaze any longer. Instead, she quickly turned to where James and the others were watching them both with collective curiosity, maybe a bit of amusement too, shining in their eyes.

“Bucky, this is Colonel James Rhodes, a very close friend of Tony’s,” She introduced and Bucky nodded, extending his flesh and blood hand towards the man.

“Colonel Rhodes, James Barnes. It’s an honour to meet you, I’ve heard a lot about you from Tony,” He greeted, James’ hand meeting his in a firm handshake.

“_Sergeant_ James Barnes,” James corrected and Bucky’s eyes crinkled slightly as their handshake ended. “Whatever Tony’s been telling you, it’s all lies. He was the troublemaker out of the both of us.”

Bucky laughed lightly and the others smiled at the exchange. Stevie was allowed to relax for a moment and let herself look-as surreptitiously as possible-her fill of Bucky while Colonel Rhodes insisted he call him James and Bucky insisted he be called well, _Bucky._

She found her eyes straying slightly while they spoke and she realized she was searching out Tony when she found him.

Tony was staring right at her and even from this distance she could see the smile he was trying to hide behind his glass of what was more than likely scotch. She exhaled shakily and for an instant, she thought Bucky had paused in his conversation with James. She wanted to turn to look, worried they’d noticed she wasn’t paying attention or _something_, but she found herself arrested by the sight of Tony leaning comfortably against the bar across the room, looking striking and handsome in his lighter grey suit-

She wanted to _groan_ in frustration. Tony was just so goddamn _confident_. He exuded confidence in pretty well everything he did and right now all she wanted to do was walk to him and go to her knees for the man.

She bit back a whimper and tried not to startle too badly when Sam asked her a question, drawing her back into conversation. Thankfully, she’d heard it and didn’t have to ask him to repeat it. She found herself picking up the conversation easily enough after that, even if her gaze kept flickering back to Bucky at her side. She swore that she could _feel_ his dark eyes on her and knew she truly never wanted him to _stop_ looking at her like this.

She couldn’t keep her heart rate under control but at least it wasn’t worry inducing. She was certain Bucky could hear it anyway, despite the level of noise around them. When he next turned his attention to Natasha as she complimented his hair, she used the opportunity to glance back to where Tony had been only moments ago, but of course, he was no longer there.

She exhaled shakily and barely managed to resist taking a panicked look around the space. But there were too many people and she knew she wouldn’t be able to find him right then. She took a deeper breath and turned her attention back to the others.

“I should go talk to Pepper, see if I can’t find Tony too,” James admitted and Stevie and the others smiled, bidding him a nice evening.

They knew they were more than likely to run into him again before the evening was out but just in case. Stevie turned her attention back to Bucky but just before James turned to leave, she heard Peter’s unmistakable laughter and so had the others. She was smiling before she’d even turned around but was entirely unprepared to see Peter...with _Tony_.

Her breath stalled in her lungs and then all at once her heart was beating too quickly for her to even attempt to get it back under her conscious control.

“_Well-_“ Tony drawled and it was _definitely_ a drawl. “Don’t you look gorgeous,” He breathed, gaze intently fixed on her and she just _knew_ that she was blushing from the bridge of her nose to her navel.

_Oh God._

She barely managed to find her breath when he let his gaze sweep over her frame from heel to hair and _smiled_ at her so wolfishly.

“_Tony-_“ She found herself saying, feeling helpless and embarrassed.

Their _friends _were right there_, Bucky_ was right there. Tony only smirked and waggled his eyebrows teasingly and she blew out a breath as she attempted to get her blush under control. This was just what Tony did._ He liked to tease his friends_. She tried to remind herself of that.

“James was just going to go looking for you,” She admitted, _distracted._

Tony positively _beamed_ when his gaze flickered over her shoulder and caught sight of Rhodey giving him those too familiar raised eyebrows of doom. “_Platypus!_” He cried and James’ face broke out into an exasperated grin before he was walking towards his friend.

“Hey, Tony Stank,” He teased back and ignored his friend’s indignant squawk as they came in for a tight hug.

“Missed you, sour patch,” Tony sighed, clapping James on the back before they pulled apart.

Bucky had an adorably confused look on his face though and Stevie chuckled as she walked over to be closer to him. “I’m confused,” He admitted and Stevie laughed.

“So are we,” She admitted and Bucky smiled at her fondly.

Peter was soon standing in front of them with his face split into the most adoring smile. “Hi, Peter, don’t you look smart,” She greeted, reaching out to gently smooth down the fabric of his lapel; he looked charming in his navy blue suit.

Peter puffed up his chest with pride as he smiled up at her, those lovely bright eyes shining with happiness. “Thank you, but I am a far cry from the belle of the ball,” He teased, winking at her.

Stevie laughed and couldn’t stop the roll of her eyes. “That a line you expect me to fall for, Parker?”

Bucky grinned and Peter spluttered, blushing hotly but still smiling brightly up at her. “_You?_ No way,” He assured, winking at her for good measure. “You’re _waay _outta’ my league, Cap.”

Stevie laughed and _now_ she was blushing lightly, despite rolling her eyes once again at the younger man. “Uh huh, where are Ned and MJ? I thought the three of you were here together.”

“They’re around, Tony just needed me for a second, wanted me to meet someone and then he caught sight of, well, _you_ so we had to come over. I don’t think we’ve ever seen you wear a dress before,” Peter admitted, smiling kindly at her. “I think you look beautiful in just about anything, mind you, but this is really very pretty on you.”

Stevie ducked her head slightly, intensely aware of the fact that Bucky was still standing beside her, gaze intently fixed upon her. “Thank you, Peter. That’s very sweet of you to say...I-“ She inhaled shakily and turned to Bucky, her blue eyes bright with honesty as she looked up at him through her lashes. “I know I have Bucky and Tony to thank for all this...” She murmured, gesturing lightly to herself.

Peter’s eyes widened and he found his gaze flickering between Bucky and then Tony who was still talking to James just over Stevie’s shoulder, entirely oblivious to their conversation. “Wow, uh-“ Peter started, entirely at a loss.

Stevie huffed softly and turned her attention back to Peter before Bucky had the chance to do or say anything to that. “I think your friends are looking for you,” She murmured, catching sight of the pair over his shoulder, not too far off.

“_Oh-_“ Peter shifted, reaching up to rub at the back of his neck. “Right, well I should uh, go find-“

Stevie glanced in the direction she’d seen them and Peter grinned when he turned and saw them as well. “I’ll see you later, Peter, have fun.”

“B-bye-“ Peter huffed, smiling at them both and then winking at Bucky just before he turned and darted away.

Bucky chuckled softly under his breath and Stevie smiled, that apparently forever present blush still very much present. The others had moved slightly away when a few wait staff came around with fresh _hors d’oeuvres_ and champagne and had inadvertently given the pair a little space to themselves.

They found themselves caught up in each other’s stare again and neither really knew what to say nor how to break it. Bucky exhaled a soft breath, feeling a little silly. This was _Stevie._ “You do look very beautiful,” Bucky admitted, voice quiet.

Stevie swallowed hard and bit her lower lip, the action drawing Bucky’s gaze for a fraction of a second. “Thank you, Bucky...thank you so much for what you did, you don’t-you don’t know how much-“ She shook her head as unexpected tears gathered behind her eyes and Bucky smiled kindly at her, his grey-blue’s softening as he took another step closer to her.

Mindful of the number of people around them, he gently brushed the backs of his flesh and blood knuckles against her pale hand that held her new clutch. He didn’t imagine the shiver that ran through her at the contact, he was certain.

“I’m so glad you wore it, Stevie,” He admitted quietly. “You’ve always been beautiful but I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so happy nor half as confident as you are right now...”

Stevie’s next breath nearly shuddered as it fell from her lips and Bucky’s smile only grew at the shaky sound of it. “_Bucky-_“ She whispered helplessly, unsure and nervous, despite the confidence he said he could see in her.

Bucky simply shook his head and flickered his eyes to his left. Stevie could see Tony shifting just barely out of the corner of her eye and her breath caught for an instant. “I’m going to get a drink at the bar. Don’t wander off too far,” He told her quietly, leaning in to her space only a smidge more before he was leaving her side.

She didn’t think she imagined the slightly deeper breath in he took at his closeness. Stevie tried to collect herself and found it harder than she expected when in the next moment, Tony was stepping up beside her. She turned to watch as he took a sip of his drink, his gaze, like dark chocolate, following the path Bucky had taken through the crowd to the bar.

“He’s right, you know,” Tony murmured, smiling softly to himself. “You do look happy,” He agreed, turning to face her properly and Stevie had no choice but to do the same.

“That’s because I am happy,” She agreed, her bright blue eyes flitting over his features. “Tony, I wanted to thank-“

“_Stevie-_“ He interrupted gently. “This was entirely Bucky’s idea,” He told her earnestly, his dark gaze slipping down and then back up her body.

She tried very hard not to duck her head under his intent perusal of her. “He wanted to do something special for you, I merely gave him the means to do so.”

Stevie shook her head, not unkindly. “You’ve always helped more than you know.”

Tony’s eyes crinkled with his smile then, but he shook his head slowly. “I’m glad you’re happy, Stevie and you do look gorgeous,” He exhaled heavily and found himself meeting her gaze and _holding_ it as he whispered, “You don’t know how many eyes you have on you right now. Just about every person in the room is just waiting to talk to you, try and get close to you but I’m rather convinced that no one would dare try so long as Bucky...or I, remain at your side.”

Stevie swallowed hard and resisted looking around her to see if what he said was true. She knew that Tony wouldn’t lie to her about such a thing. “Does it make you want to stand up taller? Does it make you want to preen under the attention?”

Stevie exhaled shakily and found herself unable to look away from his captivating gaze. “_Tony,_ I-“

His gaze softened then and he shook his head. “My mouth is running away with from me, I apolo-“

“_Don’t..._say you’re sorry, Tony,” She admonished breathless with the need to stop him. “You’re right, you know you are, you know how it makes me feel, how-how I _like_ to be-“ She exhaled heavily and flickered her gaze away towards the bar...where Bucky was standing and drinking from a tumbler in his metal hand. “Looked at,” She finally finished, the words nothing but a whisper between them.

Tony swallowed hard and nodded, his own gaze flickering towards the bar. He’d wanted to have a conversation with Bucky...later, but there was a niggling feeling in the back of his mind that made him want to perhaps rethink that strategy. Somehow, he thought the timeline for their talk was going to come a lot sooner than they were perhaps ready for.

That didn’t mean he was going to stop it.

“There are a lot of people here waiting to talk to you, Cap...I wouldn’t want to see you disappoint them,” He sighed, winking at her as he turned back around and headed to where Pepper and Rhodey had started calling for him “Duty calls.”

Stevie let him go, because what choice did she have? She blew out a measured breath and glanced over her shoulder to where their little group had been, but she found that Natasha, Clint and Sam had disappeared and Tony, James and Pepper had likewise headed off together.

She was alone and when she turned her sights back to the bar where Bucky had been only a moment ago, she discovered that he too had gone. _Well, then...I suppose you’ll have to mingle. I’m sure you can drum up some rather sizeable donations for the Maria Stark Foundation. You always do manage...but perhaps Sarah will be of help._ She smiled to herself and hid it behind her nearly empty glass of champagne before she took another sip.

Of course it was the perfect excuse for a pair of gentlemen in stiff suits to approach her not a moment later, a glass of champagne in one of their hands offered to her within an instant of saying their _hello_’s.

_Let the schmoozing begin._

She was pleased to note the thought came to her in Tony’s teasing voice.

.

“Your glare truly is menacing,” Tony teased and Bucky huffed, his cheeks heating with only _mild_ embarrassment at being caught out.

“I can’t help it,” He muttered petulantly, putting actual effort into schooling his features.

It didn’t last and in the next moment he was scowling aggressively at the dark haired man Stevie was currently talking to across the room. Tony sighed from beside him and nodded. “I know, honestly, I don’t know how she’s putting up with him.”

Bucky grunted an affirmative, taking a sip of his drink. “If I have to watch him look down her dress one more time-“

Tony laughed outright at that and Bucky’s scowl slipped into a reluctant smile as he turned his gaze on the brunet beside him. “You’re the one that insisted it be low cut,” Tony challenged and Bucky rolled his eyes, scoffing in annoyance.

“Like you had any problem with it and wouldn’t have done the same,” He muttered, still very much petulant.

Tony grinned, dark eyes flickering back to where Stevie was currently conversing with Loki of all-

“On the contrary, I would have made it much more…_plunging_,” He teased and Bucky rolled his eyes.

“You’re a menace, you know that?”

Tony laughed, pleased and a little surprised at the reaction. Bucky wasn’t exactly telling him off for talking about her so openly. He wondered if he could coax something more daring out of the man and not be rebuffed.

“A compliment of the highest order, surely,” Tony teased, winking at Bucky in turn.

Bucky huffed but at least he was smiling, even if he was still annoyed at Loki’s apparent interest in the blonde. “I haven’t even met him properly yet and I _already _don’t like him,” He sighed.

“I’m not at all surprised,” Tony sighed. “But you know she’s not interested in him.”

Bucky’s gaze met Tony’s then and he nodded. “I do know that,” He agreed quietly and for a tense moment, both seemed unable to look away.

“You know-” Tony started, voice having gone quiet, taking a chance. “She really just enjoys the attention. It’s not like she seeks it out usually…but wearing _that_-“ He motioned to her with the hand now cradling his glass of soda and lime. “She’s far more likely to let herself feed off it.”

Bucky blinked, not entirely sure what he meant by that. “What?”

Tony arched a dark brow at him, wondering if he should truly say something about it. He felt as if he’d already said too much and it wasn’t like he could actually blame it on the alcohol anymore; he’d switched to soda quite some time ago. “She likes to be looked at,” He stated plainly, aware that there was truly no plainness to the statement.

Bucky had a dark brow raised at him in question. “And you know this, _how?_” He said slowly, noting with a rising thrill that Tony’s pulse had jumped, the vein in his neck fluttering beneath the surface of his tanned skin…that was now flushed with blood.

Tony Stark was _blushing._

Now _both_ of Bucky’s eyebrows were rising.

“It’s-“ He cleared his throat slightly. “I want to say complicated-“

Bucky barked out a surprised laugh and was quickly forced to reign it in when he seemed to draw the attention of a few people around them. He’d almost forgotten where they were. Tony was grinning widely when Bucky turned back to look at him, but he was also still a little pink beneath his facial hair. Bucky thought he looked beautiful.

“_Complicated, _he says,” Bucky teased, sipping at his drink once his laughter had abated.

Tony grinned a touch wryly at him. “It is,” He admitted. “Stevie has secrets even you don’t know and I’m pretty sure you and I both have our own secrets she’s unaware of.”

Bucky hummed, mulling that over. “And you’re privy to one such secret that explains _how_ you know she likes to be…_looked at_, as you put it?”

Tony winked at the man. “It would seem so, yes.”

Bucky shifted then, momentarily letting his eyes flit back to Stevie but finding her still chatting with Loki before turning to stand in front of Tony, fixing him with a careful look. “Just what were you two before I-before she learned that I was alive?”

The question caught Tony off guard and he swallowed hard, expression slipping only a fraction. Bucky caught it and tried to keep in mind that they were surrounded by people at the moment. At least most had been giving them a wide berth. Bucky supposed that it had something to do with him and didn’t honestly care.

“I told you,” Tony said quietly.

“I don’t think you told me everything, Tony. Don’t I have a right to know? She was my girl once, you know,” Bucky murmured, aware that he was perhaps playing dirty.

Tony nearly scowled at him, but he rolled his shoulders and smiled at him instead, letting out a weary sigh. “Pulling out the boyfriend card, yeah, okay-“

Bucky laughed softly and Tony’s gaze flickered to the curve of his lips. “I’m not above playin’ a bit dirty, no,” He admitted and was pleased to note that Tony was watching him with a sharp and calculating intensity now.

“I’m really not surprised,” He sighed, waving a hand dismissively. “You do have a right to know, I think. But it’d also be telling you a secret of hers and I don’t entirely know if I’m comfortable with that.”

Bucky’s gaze softened in understanding but before he could say that he could respect that, Tony went on to say, “Though, she never actually explicitly _told me_ that I couldn’t say anything about it.”

Their gazes locked and for a long moment neither of them truly moved…and then Bucky burst into laughter and Tony followed suit.

“_Now_, who’s playing dirty?” Bucky teased and Tony winked at him in response. “You really don’t have to tell me, Tony,” He conceded. “Not if it would upset Stevie or yourself.”

Tony blew out a long breath and nodded. “Truthfully, there were more than a handful of moments where I thought our friendship would go just that much farther, even before we found out you were alive,” He admitted.

“Why didn’t they?” Bucky asked gently.

Tony smiled at him a little sadly. “She was trying to keep her distance. Didn’t think she deserved to love someone else, not after losing you.”

Bucky felt like an idiot for asking. He had already known this. “I’m sorry,” He apologized, needlessly in Tony’s eyes.

He just shook his head in response and let out a soft sigh. “There were a few moments that…crossed the line of friendship, I’ll admit that much.”

Bucky raised a brow at him curiously. “But I thought you said-“

“_Look_, but don’t _touch_…was sort of the line, Bucky. Though…she was well aware of my looking and I, hers,” He murmured quietly, knowing that Bucky would still be able to hear him.

But when Bucky’s eyebrows furrowed in adorable confusion, Tony felt the need to elaborate…just a smidge further. “She likes to take care of herself, have you noticed that about her?”

Bucky blinked, still very much confused. “She does work out a fair bit, I guess, but the serum sort of-“

“That’s not what I’m referring to,” Tony interrupted lightly. “I heard about the crop top incident,” He admitted with a teasing smile.

Bucky’s cheeks flushed and he laughed under his breath. “Yeah, felt like a bit of an idiot with that one.”

Tony’s eyes crinkled knowingly as he watched Bucky reach up with his metal hand and clasp the back of his heated neck in an attempt to cool the rising flush there. “She spends more time on her appearance than she did when I first met her. Wears _much_ nicer clothes too, the gown she’s wearing tonight not withstanding.”

Bucky blinked and something tugged at the back of his mind, a niggling little thought. He turned around and let his gaze find Stevie once more, his grey-blue orbs flickering over her frame a couple of times, looking…_seeking_.

She shifted her weight just then to the opposite foot and Bucky caught the gentle shift of her gown at her lower back where the dress dipped precariously low. The tiniest glimpse of a different shade of blue peeking out before it was gone as the fabric settled against her porcelain skin once more.

Bucky found his attention slowly returning to Tony who was watching him intently. “You know about…”

He couldn’t bring himself to voice it and Tony’s eyes crinkled in a knowing smile, though his lips remained soft. “Do I know about what, Bucky?”

“I came home late one night, a-after hanging out with the guys. She didn’t hear me come in, had headphones on and didn’t even see me. She-“ He swallowed thickly, throat suddenly bone dry at the memory of seeing Stevie in lingerie.

He exhaled sharply when Tony’s smile bordered on a smirk. “You caught her in her negligee, didn’t you?”

Bucky exhaled roughly through his nose and found himself nodding. “How did you-“

“I told you,” Tony murmured, taking a step closer towards him, leaning in just past his ear. “She likes to be looked at.”

Bucky shifted, suddenly very much aware of the fact that he was growing hard in his trousers with not only the man’s closeness, but the thought of him watching _Stevie _in her lingerie. He wondered fleetingly if Tony was just as affected. _Oh_, but he _had_ already seen Stevie wearing-

“How did you come to find out?” He demanded, pulling out of Tony’s space and forcing the man to meet his gaze.

Tony’s eyes were sparkling as he smiled and Bucky shivered when he felt the man’s hand come to rest lightly on his right shoulder. “By accident, same as you,” He admitted. “I can show you if you like?”

Bucky blinked, not understanding. “Show me what, exactly?”

Tony winked at him. “Why don’t you go introduce yourself to Loki, I think Stevie is going to lose her temper with him in a moment and as much as I would really like to see that, I don’t think Loki would be as thrilled about the idea,” He shook his head. “Perhaps once you’ve managed to rescue her, you’ll meet me in the workshop for a moment? It won’t take long.”

Bucky nodded slowly. He had no idea what Tony had intended to show him but he certainly wanted to find out. “Alright,” He said slowly. “Though, I’m sure Stevie doesn’t _actually _need to be rescued,” He admitted, glancing back towards her.

She looked as though she had well enough in hand. Loki might be a God, but Stevie could stand her own…even in a dress. Bucky tried not to snicker at the thought. “But I think I will go and introduce myself.”

“Good idea, and besides-“ Tony chuckled. “Maybe he’ll finally stop trying to flirt with her if he knows she’s already taken.”

Bucky levelled him with a careful look. “She’s not mine right this moment, Stark.”

Tony’s eyes sparkled at the words. “She was always yours, Bucky and maybe…maybe she’ll be ours by the end of the night.”

Bucky’s breath left him in a rush as Tony’s words filtered in. It was like taking a punch to the gut. He felt winded by the _promise_ in them and Bucky found himself licking his impossibly dry lips, Tony’s eyes eagerly tracking the motion.

“Better hurry, it looks like Thor is about to intervene,” He fibbed. “I’m sure she’d much prefer you,” Tony teased and Bucky huffed and didn’t think much more on the matter before he was turning and heading across the room to the pair.

As soon as his back was to Tony, the genius very nearly sagged with relief. He was just taking _all of the chances_ today, apparently.

.

“Well, I must say-“ Came an all too familiar voice and Stevie did not hesitate to withhold a sigh that was _all _long suffering. “I don’t think I ever expected to see you looking like such a delight.”

She turned after smiling apologetically to the man and his son that she’d been speaking to and quietly bid them to have a good night. She was not at all pleased when she turned to face a smiling Loki.

“_Loki,_” She sighed. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Loki grinned as she twisted to the side in an attempt to walk past him and he would have been offended any other time, truly, but this was the good Captain, after all. She could be excused, for now.

“A little birdie told me Stark was throwing a party and I always did enjoy a good bit of fun now and again. Besides, I wouldn’t have passed up an opportunity to see you, Captain,” He admitted, falling in to step beside her.

They didn’t walk far, Stevie very quickly noting that Loki wasn’t about to let her alone so easily. She spun on her heel and plucked a flute of champagne from a passing server’s tray before forcing herself to face the God of Mischief once again.

“I’m flattered,” She stated flatly and Loki’s grin only widened.

“Of course, Captain,” He teased and she couldn’t help the roll of her eyes at his tone. “How are you enjoying the evening then?”

Stevie sighed, taking a sip of her drink. “It’s going just fine, thank you,” She offered, tone already clipped and she knew it wasn’t helping matters; Loki _liked_ when she was a shit to him.

She rolled her shoulders a little and tried to brush off the annoyed tenseness settling there. “Oh, come now,” Loki sighed, but his tone was far from hurt. “I only wanted to see you…though, I hadn’t exactly expected to see so much,” He admitted, his voice dipping lower, his gaze following suit.

Stevie barely resisted the urge to scowl and shifted from one foot to the other in agitation.

_Don’t punch him, don’t punch him, don’t punch him._

“You’d be much safer if you kept your eyes above my shoulders, Loki,” She warned, his dark gaze flickering back up to her face, those sharp eyes searching hers.

“If I have only you to contend with this evening, then I think I’ll let my eyes land where they may, _Captain_,” He teased and now Stevie _did _scowl.

“_Oh_, it won’t be just me,” She muttered into her glass of champagne, not really intending for him to hear her.

Loki raised a brow curiously and then he caught sight of movement across the room over her shoulder. He could not resist the near feral smile he fixed on her then, gaze snapping instantly back to hers.

“_No?_” He asked, noting with pleasure that he’d managed to catch her a little off guard. “Does that mean the rumours I’ve heard are true?”

Stevie’s lips parted in obvious surprise and her brows were already furrowing in confusion. “What rumours?” She demanded shortly, her eyes not straying from his.

Loki looked pleased as punch and that never bode well for _anyone_. “Your _friend_, Captain. Thor has told me so much about him,” He told her, barely managing to keep his grin in check, nor his eyes from flicking over her shoulder for a split second.

Stevie’s lips drew together in a thin line and she exhaled slowly through her nose. She forced herself to set her now empty glass of champagne on one of the tables for fear of breaking said glass in her frustration.

“I must say, I don’t think he will be much competition,” Loki went on. “I’m sure you would much prefer a _God_ over a man whom you’ve claimed as your _friend_. I believe the Mid-guardians call it the _friend-zone_ for a reason, no?”

Stevie downright _glared_ at him. “I know what I _much prefer_,” She snapped back. “And it certainly isn’t you, Loki.”

Loki outright laughed at that and Stevie’s glare hardened even more so when in the next instant, Loki was standing directly beside her, a casual arm wrapped around her waist, a cool palm settling on her hip.

“Perhaps I can at least be of assistance in _un-_friend-zoning him then?” Loki said cryptically and Stevie scowled, already shifting out of his half-embrace.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Loki but if you don’t-“

“Ah _ah-_“ Loki chided. “Something tells me he could be of the possessive sort, wouldn’t you like to find out?”

Stevie stilled, momentarily caught off guard by what he was implying. “What are you-“ She started to ask, brow furrowing in confused wariness but Loki was quickly interrupting her with a delighted laugh and she didn’t bother to mask her scowl as he apparently tried to make it appear as if she’d done something to warrant the laughter.

She didn’t bother attempting to stop the roll of her eyes.

She tried to pull away from him again, however, but then he was shifting back in front of her and that same cool hand was curling lightly at her hip. She did flinch at the contact, but he didn’t appear to be deterred as he leaned in close to whisper at her ear.

“I must say, he does look rather murderous, perhaps I misjudged the situation,” Loki breathed and Stevie’s heart felt as if it was about to pound right out of her chest.

Bucky was _watching?_

She must have made some sort of a sound at that and Loki smirked, pulling back a step, his hand slipping from her hip as he did so. He let his gaze flicker along her frame once again, sharp gaze settling on the diamond necklace she wore. He couldn’t help notice the narrowing of her bright blue orbs as he did so, however, and knew better than to press his luck.

“Perhaps you would like to introduce me,” Loki sighed but it certainly hadn’t been phrased as a question.

Stevie scoffed, unable to help herself and Loki tried not to appear too delighted by her response. He was a bit distracted, however, when they were interrupted by the _murderous one,_ as he’d coined him.

There were no words exchanged for a split second too long as Bucky stepped up to place himself just behind and to Stevie’s right. So close, in fact, that she could _feel_ the warmth he radiated at her back.

“Hey, Stevie,” He murmured, voice loud enough that both could certainly hear but not so loud as to draw attention; though, Stevie was pretty sure there was far too much attention on them regardless.

“Bucky,” She breathed, brow smoothing out as she met Loki’s challenging gaze. “This is Loki, Thor’s little brother.”

Bucky made a soft considering noise in his throat and Stevie watched in enjoyment as Loki huffed in annoyance. He very much disliked when people introduced him as Thor’s _brother_ and the fact that she had called him _little_, well-

Loki’s gaze fell to Bucky’s when the man shifted at Stevie’s back and their eyes locked in an instant. “Yes, _well-_“ Loki sighed, waving a hand as if it didn’t bother him. “Thor has told me so much about you, Bucky-“

“It’s _Barnes_,” Bucky interrupted, the corner of his lips twitching almost imperceptibly. “To you.”

Loki’s eyes narrowed a fraction but Bucky kept his steel-blue orbs fixed solely on him. A challenge, if Loki ever saw one. His gaze flickered briefly to Stevie but she hadn’t moved, barely appeared to be breathing, _actually_. Though now she wore a rather distastefully smug smile on her pretty face.

Loki found himself fighting the urge to scrunch his nose up in distaste. “_Barnes_, then,” Loki agreed, turning his attention back to the man before him. “It is a pleasure to meet you after all the talk my brother has done. It looks like you are adjusting well?”

Bucky nodded, short and sharp but when he made no further attempt to speak, Loki found himself shifting impatiently. He didn’t care for being dismissed so easily.

“Perhaps you would like to get some air, I’d like to get to know you a little better. Some of what my brother has shared with me has been quite interesting, but I think I would much prefer to hear it from _Stevie’s _**_friend_**, himself,” Loki tired.

Stevie was entirely unprepared for the weight of Bucky’s metal hand to curl protectively over her left hip and the breathless and barely stifled gasp was out before she could do anything to stop it. She _prayed_ that it was quieter than it sounded to her.

Bucky’s short near painful squeeze at her hip told her differently and she managed to find her breath in the next instant as he relaxed his hold on her but made no move to pull away.

“Thanks, but no thanks, Loki. I think Stevie n’I were going to get a couple’a drinks and meet up with Tony and the others. _Actually_, we haven’t said hello to Thor and Bruce yet, so I think we’ll grab them along the way,” He explained, gently urging Stevie to turn half away from the God.

Loki raised a dark brow in obvious annoyance but all Stevie could do was try not to grin and it surely wasn’t going very well. At least the weight of Bucky’s hand on her had her feeling more grounded.

“Of course,” Loki murmured, eyes narrowed and Stevie struggled not to smirk or say _something_ to him. “Well, it was a pleasure to meet you, Barnes.”

Bucky merely grunted and Stevie watched with perverse pleasure as Loki’s expression turned sour as Bucky’s careful hand guided her away from the God. She didn’t resist smirking at him then, nor throwing in a wink for good measure, delighted when Loki outright scowled at her before practically stomping off like a petulant child.

As soon as they were a few steps from the God, Bucky’s hand shifted to gently splay low on her back, only just grazing the bared skin there with his metal thumb. Stevie couldn’t suppress the shiver it brought her and when she turned to look at him, raising a perfectly manicured brow in question, she was met with nothing but his profile, his gaze trained ahead of him.

Of course he was smirking rather smugly, so there was that.

Stevie breathed a startled laugh and Bucky tipped his head in her direction and shot her a wink. “He was botherin’ya, doll. Tony and I just weren’t havin’ it,” He admitted, more of that Brooklyn drawl colouring his tone.

Stevie bit her lower lip and shoved his shoulder lightly, still laughing softly under her breath. “Uh huh,” She teased and Bucky grinned at her before nudging her back.

They ended up by the bar where Bucky had seen Bruce and Thor chatting with Tony and Sam and spent a little time catching up. A few other guests approached them and Stevie was eventually drawn off into conversation with them. Bucky found himself seeking out Tony soon after she was pulled away, intent upon making the genius reveal his secret sooner rather than later.

Of course he caught sight of Tony now across the room by the back entrance they’d come through, glancing over his shoulder and waiting for Bucky to acknowledge him. Bucky smirked and was rewarded with Tony’s wink, before he ducked through the doors.

Bucky took a deeper breath and quietly excused himself. _This ought to be good._


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to post this chapter! I'm so sorry! ENJOY! <33

Tony exhaled shakily as he let himself into the lab, pointedly eyeing one of Jarvis’ cameras and arching a brow. “What do you think, buddy, good idea, bad idea?”

“I am not sure I am the best to answer such a question, Sir,” Was Jarvis’ reply and Tony rolled his eyes as he absently picked up a screwdriver on his way to his desk.

Just as he turned to lean himself back against the metal tabletop, Bucky was within sight, quietly making his way past the glass windows and stepping through the still open doors. He hummed softly as he watched the brunet approach and couldn’t stop the small smirk at the sight of the man giving the room around them a quick glance and tugging lightly at his cuffs. _Clearly nervous then._

“We’re alone,” Tony assured, motioning towards the doors, Jarvis helpfully closing them.

“Didn’t think we wouldn’t be,” Was Bucky’s reply.

He seemed to hesitate a moment before he inclined his head a little to watch Tony curiously when the genius drew his lower lip between his teeth. “Are you going to tell me what you brought me down here to show me?”

Tony hummed and turned towards his desk, quickly drawing up his holoscreens. Bucky watched him manipulate them with ease and soon realized he’d pulled up a security feed of the hallways to their personal apartments. He knew there were cameras there, obviously, Jarvis was sort of everywhere. But he’d never _seen_ them.

“Why don’t you make yourself comfortable,” Tony suggested, tipping his head towards the empty workbench at his left.

There was a stool there, but Bucky didn’t feel much like sitting. Instead, he leant back against the bench and folded his arms across his chest and Tony truly did try not to stare at the way his biceps seemed to bulge beneath the material of his suit. He mentally shook himself and turned back to make sure he’d pulled up the correct time.

Bucky was watching the screen curiously as Tony repositioned it after a moment for him to see better and he only raised a curious brow as Tony seemed to find what he was looking for and stepped back a foot or so to give Bucky a proper view of the screen.

“I went to visit her one evening, thought she might like to watch a movie or something,” Tony admitted, shrugging lightly as he let his gaze flicker towards where Bucky was now watching the screen intently.

He was more interested in seeing Bucky’s reaction that watching the footage again. But that may have been because he’d already watched it more than perhaps appropriate at this point.

“There’s no audio and the video you’re about to see is in fact the last recorded in her apartment. Jarvis has some newer privacy protocols and as such, he is the only one monitoring the apartments and is only to alert me and the proper authorities of a medical emergency or any bad guy funny business.”

Bucky hummed in understanding, gaze flickering momentarily to him before focusing back on the screen to where Tony had just stepped into the frame. Bucky could clearly see Tony as he knocked on the door to Stevie’s apartment and a few moments later, he was treated to the sight of a slightly ruffled looking Stevie.

He squinted a little at the screen as he tried to read their lips, finding that with the flawless video he easily could. He could practically hear their conversation, her flustered denial of her being alone in the apartment...inviting Tony in.

That’s when the camera angle changed and Bucky’s brows rose a touch higher. Now they were inside the apartment, following Tony’s path into the living room while Stevie followed a little slower. She went to walk away but Tony said something Bucky didn’t quite manage to decipher before she was moving to take a seat on the sofa.

“Jarvis,” Tony interrupted quietly. “Why don’t you speed up the video just a bit for us.”

The A.I. complied and Bucky exhaled roughly as he watched Stevie on screen recline back, her robe sliding back to bare a shoulder with a thin strip of lace. He swallowed hard and with bated breath he was soon treated to the sight of a pretty blushing Stevie nibbling on her bottom lip as she seemingly fought with herself over how to handle Tony’s intense gaze.

And it was intense. Bucky wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Tony look at _anyone_ like that before, not even Stevie. Though clearly that was only because Tony hadn’t _let_ him see it. The genius’ gaze was heated as he took in the sight of Stevie practically trembling on the couch, lips bitten and red, cheeks and chest stained with a blush, the colour high on her cheeks.

Bucky could only recall one other instance of her looking so aroused, embarrassed and nervous all at once and _he’d_ been the reason for it. To see that Tony was able to bring that out in her...it was a lot.

And that was _before_ Stevie had stood and disrobed.

Bucky’s breath whooshed from his lungs and he found himself almost swaying forwards towards the screen, metal hand bracing against the workbench he was still leaning against. He was sure he was denting it as he attempted to grip it to ground himself. He’d never seen her quite like this before, never had the chance, never mind the lingerie. He’d never truly gotten the chance to worship her newer body. There just hadn’t been time.

“_Fuck-_“ Bucky breathed, jaw clenching and nostrils flaring at the sight of her, nearly _naked_ and-

“Yeah...that was sort of my reaction too and that was before she-“

Bucky made a positively _wounded_ sound when in the next moment she was walking towards where Tony was sitting and then just-

“Dropped to her goddamned _knees_,” Tony breathed, voice hushed and reverent.

“_Tony-_“ Bucky pleaded and _what_ exactly he was pleading for, he didn’t fucking know but Tony merely hummed as if understanding all the same.

“Pretty as a picture,” He murmured, gaze flickering back to Bucky’s face, watching the awe and arousal swirling in his steel blue eyes. “Nothing happened between us,” He assured. “Well, nothing more than what you see there,” He admitted shakily, watching as his video self gently carded fingers through her curls.

“H-how-what-“ Bucky shook his head and forced himself to try again. “How did nothing else happen after this?” He asked hoarsely and Tony huffed a little, shrugging as Bucky brought his gaze to him.

“Well, there were..._other_ times where I was invited up to her apartment to join her for what she calls her _me time_...and all I ever did was look and all she ever did was look back. She didn’t kneel for me again and I never asked her to. We grew closer, sure, but neither of us could cross that line any further after that first night,” He admitted quietly. “And then there was that night I found her after a few too many drinks...and you know the rest.”

Bucky swallowed thickly, gaze flickering back to the now still video, a moment in time frozen just..._there_. Stevie’s eyes were closed, lips lax with pleasure and sleep and Tony...Tony was looking down at her with such an adoring gaze, _loving_.

“Wow-“ Was apparently all Bucky was capable of saying just then and really, Tony couldn’t honestly blame him.

He huffed softly, a little embarrassed and a lot amused. “I honestly never intended to uncover such a secret.”

Bucky huffed an incredulous laugh. “No kiddin’.”

Tony smiled wryly and shrugged as he went to dismiss the screen and when he turned back to Bucky, he was surprised to find the man giving him this _look._

“What?”

Bucky arched a brow at him carefully. “Nothin’, just thinking.”

Now it was _Tony’s_ turn to raise a brow in question. “About?”

Bucky shrugged, folding his arms back in front of his chest as he leant against the workbench. “I suppose,” Bucky started, inhaling deeply. “That we’re going to have to do something about..._this_,” He managed after a beat and Tony’s breath stalled as Bucky motioned to the space between them.

“_Oh-_“ He blurted, shifting slightly and then quickly glanced away. “Well, I-yes, but-“

“_Tony-_“ Bucky interrupted quietly and calmly reached out to squeeze the man’s shoulder with the metal hand.

“Yeah?” Tony asked shakily, the weight of that metal hand somehow grounding him that much more.

“I think...that we’re going to need a plan...you know, since we’ve sort of outed ourselves to her tonight. Can’t very well have her wondering if she’s going to have to choose between us,” He admitted.

Tony’s breath _whooshed _from his lungs and Bucky’s smile turned a little crooked.

“Y-yeah, that sounds good,” He agreed, nodding perhaps a little too vigorously. “But uh, what or-“ He cleared his throat. “How are we going to go about this? I’m actually not entirely sure I know what..._this_ is.”

Bucky huffed in amusement, his metal hand slipping from Tony’s shoulder only to grasp the back of his neck self consciously. “I’m not entirely sure I know what this is either,” He admitted quietly and Tony’s gaze softened when he caught the obvious nerves behind the words.

“I like you,” Tony blurted, clearly surprising not only Bucky but himself as well if the doe eyed look he was sporting was any indication.

“Well, that’s good,” Bucky breathed. “Because I like you too.”

Tony made a slightly strangled noise in the back of his throat and Bucky’s smile grew more confident. “I don’t know _why_ but-“

“_Tony-_“ Bucky laughed softly, already shaking his head as he dropped his hand from the back of his neck and took a tentative step towards the supposed genius. “I like you,” He sighed and he reminded him far too much of Stevie right then, in that it was _all _long suffering. “Because you’re _you_.”

Tony inhaled sharply at not only the words, not only the soft and somehow exasperated way they were spoken, but at the now very close proximity they were in. Tony was maybe a little embarrassed by the soft noise he made at the quiet confession. But that was _before_ he noticed the way Bucky’s gaze flickered momentarily to his lips and then back up again.

It was such a small thing and really, Tony would have let it go, not provoked the man, already nervous himself, but Bucky was just so damn _earnest_ and it was maybe pulling at his heart _just _a little bit, okay?

So, that’s why, in a moment of pure weakness and desire, he licked his lips. You know, just to see what would happen.

He was really pleased by what happened.

Bucky made a soft noise, barely audible in the quiet of the lab, his gaze unmistakably flickering back down to his now spit slick lips and Tony wanted to groan as he watched Bucky’s eyes track the movement and dilate just the tiniest bit. So of course he really couldn’t resist drawing his bottom lip in _just_ a smidge with his teeth, worrying at it.

Bucky downright _groaned_ and honestly, Tony should have known better than to tease the wolf. Apparently he just wasn’t thinking with the right head right then.

In the next moment, Bucky was surging forward and Tony was swept up in a fiercely needy kiss. One he was all too pleased to fall victim to. He moaned long and low as Bucky’s hands planted themselves on his body, metal at his hip, flesh at the back of his neck and Tony had never felt so impossibly _small_ before. Bucky was a big guy, who knew? He was also so _warm_ and solid and _oh God-_

He gasped in the next moment, those searing lips parting and an equally as hot tongue was working its way into his mouth and he _groaned_ with how good it all felt. It’d been so _long_ since he’d been kissed properly like this. His hands quickly wound themselves into Bucky’s immaculate bun, tugging the hair tie until it gave and prompting the man to grunt softly as Tony’s fingers caught and _pulled_ just a tad roughly. A helpful tidbit for later, he supposed.

Tony couldn’t be bothered to apologize, not when it got him the most filthy nip and _suck_ to his bottom lip. He whimpered and swore his knees were going to give out on him if Bucky so much as gripped him too hard. Bucky hitched in a breath as he let go of his lower lip and pulled back from the kiss, effectively breaking it.

They looked at each other dazedly for a beat, all wide dark eyes and pouty pink lips, shiny with spit that wasn’t entirely theirs alone. Tony’s hands hadn’t released Bucky’s hair and Bucky’s hadn’t exactly gone far either, both now settled snugly on Tony’s hips, warm and _solid_ beneath his hands. Bucky swallowed heavily and licked his lips, ignoring the way Tony’s eyes tracked the motion for an instant, now very much unsure as to what to say.

“I’ve never kissed someone with facial hair before,” Is what he went with.

There was a beat of silence and then all at once, Tony’s laugh filled the space, practically bursting out of him and Bucky grinned wryly as he too started to laugh. Tony’s head head fell to rest against his sternum and Bucky’s flesh and blood hand moved to grasp lightly at the back of Tony’s neck as they laughed together.

They were both breathless with it as they eventually calmed, letting out little sighs as they righted themselves, pulled themselves together as it were. Tony slowly pulled away to take a very unenthusiastic step back and Bucky released him just as reluctantly.

“I...suppose that might be odd the first time, yes,” Tony chuckled and Bucky blushed lightly but was still smiling at least.

“Not really odd, just...different and I did like it,” He admitted shyly and Tony’s gaze softened, flicking down to look at Bucky’s slightly askew tie.

He couldn’t help reaching up to gently smooth it down and adjust the knot, biting down on his bottom lip as Bucky’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “That’s-“ He cleared his throat slightly. “That’s good then,” He managed to croak, letting his gaze come up to focus on the brunet’s.

Bucky was smiling at him nervously, dark grey eyes sparkling and then Tony felt a soft squeeze at his hip, only just now apparently realizing that both of the man’s hands were still grasping his hips and _oh _he wanted to _groan _at how amazing that felt. He exhaled shakily and Bucky leaned in a little as Tony’s hands fell to his shoulders and gently brushed his nose against the genius’.

“So...” Bucky breathed, lips so close, teasing Tony with the possibility of a kiss, only just barely brushing but the heat was there and Tony shivered at it.

“So...” Tony mirrored and he would be embarrassed at how breathy he sounded with just about anyone else.

A swoop of warmth settled low in his belly that made him want to squirm in place beneath the man’s heady gaze.

“I think Stevie would fit pretty perfectly between us, don’t you?” Bucky murmured and Tony’s breath caught, because yeah, yeah she definitely would.

“I am 100% on board with seeing where uh-where t-this might go between us and-“ He shook his head a little, drawing back only a little so that he could _think_ a little more clearly, _damnit._ Maybe. “I would really like to be able to tell Stevie how much I-how much I care about her,” He admitted quietly, unable to hold Bucky’s piercing gaze any longer and instead focusing on a spot on the brunet’s chest.

That...may have not exactly been better. It was a _great_ chest.

“Yeah, doll...I’d like that too,” Bucky breathed, drawing Tony’s attention, his voice nothing but a breathy whisper and Tony’s chest constricted as Bucky leant in and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips.

“_Great-_“ Tony did not squeak.

Nope, _not at all_.

“T-then maybe we should t-talk about that plan...while not-“ He cleared his throat nervously and attempted to pull back a bit more, Bucky’s hands dropping carefully from their spot at his waist. “Attempting to climb each other like a tree.”

Bucky laughed and despite his slight smirk, he was still blushing and shying away a little. “Yeah, think you might be right,” He admitted quietly, watching as Tony shifted in place, clearly regretting everything he’d just said, even if it was the smart thing to do.

Tony gently smoothed a hand down the front of his suit jacket to fix any possible crinkles and Bucky watched him do it, thinking of all the ways he might like to really rumple him.

Tony hummed softly and Bucky tried to will his blush to calm at his _very _inappropriate thoughts as Tony’s gaze swept along his frame with a heated quality that had him twitching in his slacks. He really needed to take a step back and cool off because-

“Fuck I want you to do so many awful things to me _and_ I want Stevie to watch you do it,” Tony blurted and as he was entirely unaware that he’d actually _said _any of that out loud, continued to stare lustfully at Bucky.

He obviously realized that he had in fact said all of that _out loud_, when a moment later Bucky blinked and not giving himself enough time to think about it, swooped in to steal Tony’s lips in a desperate kiss. He may have melted a little at the way Tony’s whole body seemed to _tremble_ against him before he was opening up so sweetly and letting Bucky practically _devour_ him.

The kiss must have lasted only a few minutes, both barely taking the time to pull apart for some much needed air as their hands wandered and bodies pressed in close. Tony was now sandwiched back against his desk with Bucky standing between his legs and they weren’t exactly _grinding_ on each other but it was a very near thing, hands wound in each other’s hair and _definitely_ messing up their perfectly neat hair.

So of course it was right around then that the Avengers alarm started to blare.

“_Fuck-_“ Tony burst out, both jumping back from one another hastily, wide eyed, cheeks flushed and hair a mess; not to mention their suits all rumpled.

There was really no doubting what they’d been up to, especially if you got a look at their lips, kiss bitten and swollen with blood. Bucky wanted to growl at the sight.

Bucky made an equally distressed noise at the sound of the alarm and licked his lips nervously, gaze dragging along Tony’s slightly dishevelled frame and wondering if he looked just as rumpled. “Quinjet?” He breathed and Tony nodded before they were jerking into motion.

Tony was suited up in a matter of moments and Bucky had already started running towards the nearest cache.

It took no time at all for them to reconvene on the roof, Tony floating idly by the already running jet. He had his faceplate down and was watching him walk up the ramp and Bucky couldn’t help but swallow thickly at the sight of him. At least you couldn’t _tell_ they’d been doing anything, Bucky’s hair now back in a haphazard bun and Tony’s hair obscured by the helmet.

Their lips on the other hand...

They didn’t see any of the others yet, Jarvis assuring them both, however, that they were on their way and sure enough, the pair had barely a moment alone again together before Natasha, Clint, Sam, Bruce, Peter, Thor and Loki came striding out of the doors.

Bucky glanced towards the sound of their voices and couldn’t help flickering a nervous look to Tony when he didn’t notice Stevie amongst them. Tony, however, was already frowning when he didn’t see her join them.

“Where’s Cap?” He called and Bucky grunted, clearly wondering the same thing.

Natasha rolled her eyes as she got closer, the others heading up the ramp past them. “She’s coming, something about not wanting to ruin her dress and needing to be _extra careful_.”

Bucky couldn’t help his smile and when he glanced to Tony out of the corner of his eye, he found the genius clearly fighting a smile of his own. “Right, okay, _well-_“ Tony started and he was only slightly paying attention while Tony started to follow Nat up the ramp, reluctantly following as well as Tony started to rattle off information about the apparent call to Assemble.

Something about a less than friendly group hell bent on obtaining a ransom or some shit and they’d managed to get their hands on some particularly heavy explosives and had a so far undetermined number of hostages.

_Yeah_, it wouldn’t be pretty if they didn’t hurry up.

Just as Bucky’s feet hit the ramp, the rustle of fabric and quick movements reached his ears at his back and he turned to see Stevie jogging out from the rooftop entrance, shield strapped to her back and hair still artfully swept to the side in that lovely braid.

She hadn’t put on her cowl yet and as she jogged up the ramp, no pretty blue dress in sight, Bucky still couldn’t help thinking about just how beautiful she was. “Alright, who crashed the party?” She sighed and Tony turned at the same time they made it to the top of the ramp with a wry grin on his face.

“Group of seven men, got a hold of some explosives, they’re demanding money and now they’ve got hostages,” Tony informed her and when her calculating blue eyes met his, he swallowed thickly, wondering if she could somehow see what he and Bucky had been up to.

The ramp drew up and closed behind them and they both watched then as Stevie reached to finish zipping up her uniform, pulling it closed at the front of her throat and there was that little flash of skin and they both _desperately_ wanted to get their lips on her. The thought was enough to prompt both men into a blush and each did their best not to look each other in the eye, lest they do something stupid.

“_Right-_“ She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose as she went to join the others around the holo table, Bucky tentatively following along behind her with careful steps; his tac pants were a little tight at the moment.

He maybe wondered if she couldn’t tell what they’d been up to as well and when Tony shot him a commiserating smile a few minutes later as he too shifted in the Iron Man suit, he thought that things might be just fine. For a little while anyway.

Famous last words.

.

“_Holy mother of_-“

“_Tony-_“ Came Stevie’s warning and Clint snickered over the comm. “We need to focus guys, the hostages may be out but these guys aren’t going down without a fight and it’s not going to be much of one if we don’t get in there and do something now.”

“There’s access to the floors they’re on from the roof, the air team can drop off you, Bucky and Nat when you’re ready,” Tony told them and Stevie hummed.

“Just Bucky and I for now, we’ll see if we can’t get in and get a read on the situation. We’ve confirmed all sixty-five hostages have been evacuated on the ground, perimeter is set but these guys aren’t exactly turning themselves over,” Stevie sighed.

“_And_, they’ve got enough firepower to level the building and then some,” Clint oh so helpfully added.

Hence the, _holy mother of _comment.

“And that,” Stevie sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose wearily. “Alright, Buck and I will go in, I want the rest of you on standby. Thor, Loki, that includes you,” She warned and Bucky didn’t think twice about following her as she headed for Tony and Sam.

“Your chariot awaits, m’lady,” Sam joked, grinning at her and she rolled her eyes and shifted to stand in front of, the man’s arms coming round to grasp her waist.

“Guess that means I’m your ride,” Tony said teasingly and even though Bucky couldn’t see his face behind the faceplate, he just knew that Tony was smirking as he said it.

Bucky sort of wished that he was wearing his mask to hide the grin and fierce blush he was trying and failing to suppress. “Guess so, sugar.”

And if Tony maybe swooned and chuckled to hide it, the sound of his laughter tinny yet still very distinctly _Tony,_ no one was the wiser; except for maybe Bucky.

It didn’t take long for Sam and Tony to get the pair on the roof and it took even less time for them to get down about a dozen or so floors and closer to where the group was hiding out. The only problem? The bombs they discovered along the way.

“We have a problem,” Bucky muttered into the comms, stopping at the same time Stevie had stopped a few feet ahead of him.

She had motioned towards where a few tables had been overturned and Bucky swallowed thickly at the sight that met them.

“We’ve got eyes on a bomb here,” Stevie dropped over the comms and there was a chorus of concerned voices in their ears.

“How big? What does it look like? Are there timers? How many wires?” Tony was asking hurriedly and Stevie made a frustrated sound in the back of her throat.

“I don’t know, Tony. It’s not exactly small but it doesn’t look that-“

“It’s got enough C4 to blow a sizeable hole in this building, probably take out a few around it with the blast radius, digital, wired up to a cellphone,” Bucky rattled off.

“_Alright_, executive decision time-“ Tony snapped. “_Out_-out right the fuck now, these guys are not planning on coming quietly.”

“_Copy-_“ Both Bucky and Stevie muttered and within seconds they were sprinting the fuck out of there.

“We’re re-establishing a wider perimeter, block’s being cleared as we speak,” Natasha alerted and they knew Peter and Bruce were helping escort the hostages while Clint and Nat monitored the situation from a safe distance, Thor and Loki on crowd control. Though, Loki really just kept an eye on Thor.

Sam and Tony had been circling the building, trying to get a visual on the group but they really weren’t having much luck and now Stevie and Bucky were trying to get out as fast as super humanly possible.

“Hurry the fuck up, I don’t want either of you in there if those bombs go off. Get to the roof, Sam and I are on our way,” Tony ordered.

“We’re at the roof and watch your language,” Stevie growled as they shouldered their way out through the rooftop door, hinges snapping as the metal door slammed back against the wall.

That’s when the explosion hit.

The building shook beneath their feet and Stevie stumbled back into Bucky, both losing their footing and falling to their knees. There was a commotion over the comms but all Stevie could hear was the rushing of her own blood in her ears as she struggled to her feet. Bucky’s metal hand wrapped around her upper arm and she let him tug her upright and together they tried to get to the other side of the rooftop.

The roof was buckling beneath them, the building groaning ominously and they could both hear more explosions going off beneath them, Tony and Sam yelling into the comms, saying something about falling debris.

Sam couldn’t get there for a pickup right that moment

“Fuck, _fuck_-“ Bucky hissed. “_Tony!_” He barked. “Get Cap out of here!”

Stevie made an indecipherable noise as they got to the edge of the roof and turned to look back at her friend. She outright _growled_ at Bucky, glaring all the while as she breathed into the comm and tried to keep her footing, despite the shifting of the rooftop.

“Get _Bucky_ out of here, not me, Tony!” She hissed.

“I can’t fuckin’ get _either _of you dimwits out of there, wait-_wait!_” He was suddenly shouting. “Don’t you dare jump!” Tony snapped and Stevie licked her lips, having been planning to do just that as soon as Tony or Sam had Bucky in their grasp.

Bucky’s eyes were wide as he recognized that goddamn look in her eyes. He couldn’t _believe_ she was actually thinking about jumping right now-

“Don’t you fucking dare-“ Bucky hissed and she shook her head.

“Tony, you get Bucky first. I’ll-“

She was cut off when another explosion rocked the building and Bucky swore as the floor beneath her gave entirely, the edge of the building falling away and taking her with it. Bucky lunged forward in an attempt to grab her as she flailed, struggling to find purchase and holy _fuck-_

“_Stevie-_“ He said brokenly realizing with a dawning horror that he couldn’t reach her.

She gasped, the sound sharp in his ear over the comm and then she was falling.

All Bucky could see as he landed on his belly, metal arm outstretched towards her, was the wide-eyed and panicked look on her face, her lips parted around his name.

The fact that she was reaching for him only broke him even more. He spoke into the comm hoarsely, calling out to Tony, Falcon, _Thor, anybody _**_please_** _get to Cap she’s-_

The roof started to give beneath him too and he realized he needed to jump out from it if he had any sort of chance at being grabbed too. He couldn’t see Stevie as he lurched himself over the same side she’d fallen from and prayed to the God he now longer believed in that she’d make it. _Please just save her, please._

There were shouts in his ear and he could hear Sam’s colourful curses, rivalling even Tony’s more creative ones and suddenly the breath _whooshed_ from his lungs, his entire body jerking from sudden whiplash as Tony caught him around the middle.

“_Tony!_” He shouted in anger, twisting in the man’s grasp to glare at him fiercely.

“Calm down,” He snapped, adjusting his grip on Bucky’s middle. “Sam’s got her, took her to safety. She lost her comm-“

Bucky’s entire body _sagged_ with relief and Tony struggled for a moment even with the suit as Bucky turned practically into a noodle in his arms.

“_Christ_, you two are a pair,” Bucky heard Tony mutter absently, beyond relieved that Sam had managed to get to her in time.

All he was able to do was make a soft noncommittal noise as Tony dove down towards the deserted street to what looked like a coffee shop, windows blown out and its patio awning falling over and blocking the view of the inside.

“I dropped her off, Bucky. _Relax_, she’s safe...though, the landing wasn’t exactly graceful,” Sam offered over comms and Bucky growled.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He snapped but didn’t have to wonder very long when he noted the hole in the roof of the coffee shop. “You’re a dead bird, Wilson.”

Tony huffed in amusement even while there were a few snickers over the line. Bucky could only roll his eyes as Tony warned him. “Tuck and roll, Bucky bear.”

Bucky grunted and did just that and when Tony dropped him just over the Stevie shaped hole in the roof, he tried not to roll his eyes too hard.

He managed the landing, even if it was a bit hurried and less than graceful. He heard a surprised inhale and looked up to find Stevie just getting to her feet, covered in dust and debris and a wide-eyed look of surprise on her pretty face, her cowl clutched in her hands.

He didn’t think twice as he got to his feet and stalked towards her, not even when she said his name in surprise and most likely an apology even if nothing had been her fault to begin with. He was a man on a mission though and regardless of the fact that he knew he was probably giving her the most _murderous_ look he was capable of right then, she didn’t look frightened or worried or anything other than _relieved_ at seeing him in one piece, if the way her gaze flickered over his frame was anything to go by.

“God, _Stevie_,” He breathed, eyes wild. “You scared me somethin’ fierce.”

She opened her mouth to apologize, mostly out of habit, but all that came out was a startled squeak when Bucky marched right into her space and shoved her back against the wall, one hand finding its way into her mess of curls that had escaped her braid and the other cupping the side of her cheek.

The metal was cool against her suddenly over heated skin and she flushed right down to her _toes_ when she met Bucky’s intense stare, gasping in the next moment when his lips met hers.

She whimpered, surprise and relief and so much _more_ fluttering behind her ribs as he held her, her own hands dropping her cowl and coming up to clutch desperately at whatever part of him she could reach. His lips moved against hers and she found herself opening up to him easily, whimpering as he kissed her harder, his tongue slipping into her mouth as if to claim her with a fierceness she hadn’t experienced before.

She was trembling and didn’t appear to realize it as Bucky pressed in closer, practically bullying into her space and _oh, _why did she find that so hot? “_Bucky_,” She gasped in surprise, their kiss momentarily broken when the hand that had been cupping her cheek suddenly shifted to grab atthe back of her thigh.

Bucky didn’t say anything, merely grunted as he bent and grasped her a little tighter and she choked back an embarrassed moan as he coaxed her into jumping up. Within seconds he had her pinned back properly against the wall, her shield digging in roughly against the crumbling plaster. His metal hand grasped the back of her thigh tighter and the other clasped at the side of her neck, caressing her reverently. She didn’t bother to stifle a moan in the next moment as he claimed her lips in yet another desperate kiss.

It was hot and wet and everything she didn’t know she wanted let alone _needed_ right then and she buried her hands in his hair, his bun long having come undone, and tilted him head just where she wanted him.

_Now_ she was kissing him and far more in control of it, despite their positions.

Bucky groaned softly as she nipped at his bottom lip and in the next moment sucked on his tongue. He thought his knees might buckle and he tried to firm them up and in turn pressed her that much harder against the wall, some of the plaster crumbling to their feet.

“W-want you, pretty. I want you so bad, Stevie. You scared me so much,” Bucky breathed, twisting slightly in the same breath and tearing his comm out of his ear, the dull thud it made against the ground lost to them both beneath the sound of their panting breaths.

“_Bucky,_” She whimpered, arching up into his space and he groaned softly. “I want you too,” She breathed, practically squirming in his grasp and she choked on a rough gasp as he forced her head up and back, baring what he could of her throat to his hungry lips.

“That’s good, pretty,” He murmured, pressing searing kisses against her throat, along her jaw, nipping as he went. “Wanted you for so long, wanted you as soon as I knew who you were again-“

She interrupted him with a distraught whimper and he shuddered, hiking her up a bit higher against the wall, revelling in the little cry she gave in response. “_Ohhh-_“ She breathed, biting down hard on her lower lip as Bucky’s flesh hand grabbed at the hidden zipper at her throat.

“Gotta’ get this offa’ you, doll. Gotta’ let me see ya,” He breathed, voice low and _God_ it was heady, the power she apparently had over this man.

It wasn’t like it wasn’t mutual.

“Yes, _yes, Bucky_,” She gasped, reaching up when he fumbled one too many times with the zipper to do it herself.

She nearly tore it in her haste to get it down and Bucky downright _moaned_ so damn filthily when pale blue lace was revealed to him. She shuddered at the sound and found herself watching his expressions carefully as she pulled the zipper right down to her navel.

Bucky pulled back to watch her heatedly as he dragged his hand from her hip to splay wide against the delicate lace over her belly. She gasped at his touch and Bucky swallowed hard, gaze snapping back up to hers. When she merely swallowed thickly, Bucky stole her lips in yet another kiss, this one somehow far more needy than the last.

He hoped she didn’t mind, but judging by the way she started squirming and shoving her uniform down her arms as much as she was able with the damn shield still strapped to her back, Bucky figured she was feeling just as desperate and needy as he was.

He did his best to help her, pulling back only far enough to help her get her arms out of her sleeves. There was a bit of laughter when they realized Bucky was going to have to put her down if he wanted to get her naked and he reluctantly let her right herself.

She unclasped her utility belt, the sound of it hitting the floor lost on him as he continued to watch hungrily as she undid the shield harness, it too falling the floor. She tore off her gloves and pulled off her left boot but he was too damn impatient already and barely let her get that off.

With a frustrated growl that had her inhaling sharply, he tugged her pant leg down and off. Now, with one bared leg and the rest of her upper half bared to him, he didn’t think it wholly necessary to rid her of the rest. He barely spared a moment to unbuckle his own belt and eagerly helped her as fumbling hands went to his tac vest, undoing buckles, the metal clanking loudly they were finally undone.

She shoved it off him too with heated whispers falling from her lips, harsh curses falling from his and he hurriedly pushed his pants down his thighs, revelling in her heated gaze and soft moan when she caught sight of him hard beneath his briefs. His gaze flickered back over her frame and she shivered in anticipation.

The pale blue teddy she wore wears intricate and near see-through in many places and _oh_, but it looked so delicate and sweet on her gorgeous frame. He swallowed thickly and forced his gaze back up to focus on her bright blue eyes.

“You particularly fond of that?” He forced out, motioning towards her garment, voice so rough it was barely recognizable.

Stevie shuddered hard at the sound and had to close her eyes for a moment to collect herself. She’d barely managed to shake her head before Bucky pressed back in close and reached for the small diamond shaped hole that showed off her belly button. He hooked his metal fingers beneath the fabric and gave it a quick tug and neither were surprised when it gave easily beneath his hands, tearing up the front and then down between her legs. The lace fell in pieces as he tore it from her, only the top half managing to cling to her frame just then.

She whimpered softly as she was bared to him and the open air of the blown out shop and the way his gaze hungrily tracked down her body, taking in the sight of her bared stomach, abs flexing as she breathed in shakily and _oh_, he wanted to _growl_ at the small patch of what he knew would be downy soft hair.

Oh, but he wanted to eat her _alive_.

“I want to eat you alive,” He voiced and she shivered, her thighs tensing as heat coursed through her.

She barely suppressed a moan and in the next moment she was gasping in surprise when he grabbed her by her hips and coaxed her back up against the wall, long legs wrapping tightly around his thick waist.

She threw her hands up to clutch at his shoulder blades and Bucky dove in for another kiss, forcing his tongue past her already swollen lips. She melted into it, into him easily and Bucky ground up against her.

She could _feel_ how hard he was, still hidden beneath his briefs and she whimpered and gasped at the friction and Bucky didn’t know how much longer he could hold out before he begged her-

“I want you in me, Buck, c’mon,” She moaned, startling him, nipping at his ear and down along his jaw.

He was panting into the side of her throat when she told him and he ground up particularly hard against her, cock twitching heavily and he moaned at how good it felt. She squirmed in his grasp and Bucky bit down on the juncture of her shoulder, unable to help himself. She cried out at the sting and arched hard against him, forcing him into movement.

He pulled his teeth from her shoulder and growled under his breath as he shifted back just enough to get a hand down between them. She hissed softly as the cooler metal of his arm brushed up against the inside of her thigh and Bucky murmured a quiet apology as he finally shoved his briefs down far enough to get his cock out.

He grunted softly with only a bit of effort to keep her in place when Stevie squirmed in his arms, worming a hand down between them to bat Bucky’s hand aside before he had a chance to wrap it around himself properly. He sucked in a sharp breath through gritted teeth as he felt her smaller hand wrap around him, stroking him a little clumsily.

“_Bucky-_“ She practically whined. “Put it in me, Buck, c’mon, stop teasin’. I need you, Bucky. Don’t make me wait,” She begged and Bucky was powerless to deny her as she shifted her hips impatiently as much as her position would allow of her.

“_Christ, _Stevie. How I forgot you had a mouth on you, I’ll never know,” He muttered, nipping at her bottom lip as he hiked her up that much more against the wall, revelling in her gasp as she was finally able to direct him where she wanted.

“_Oh-_“ She breathed, the head of his cock sliding against her already slick folds.

She squirmed impatiently and Bucky _really_ wanted to draw this out, maybe open her up nice and easy with a couple of fingers, but there really wasn’t a lot of time and they were seriously in the wrong place for this sort of thing. What were they _thinking?_

“_Yes-_“ She suddenly hissed, tipping her head back against the wall as Bucky kicked his hips up at the perfect moment and started to sink inside.

He grunted, forcing himself to go slow and not close his eyes against the unbelievable pressure and pleasure of her body opening up-

“So sweet, pretty. _Oh_, you open up so sweet for me,” Bucky breathed, lips finding their way to her throat and pressing eager wet kisses against the sensitive skin there.

“Bucky,” She whimpered, squirming in an attempt to get more of him inside her, but he wasn’t letting her control the pace right then.

Bucky hushed her, pressing heated kisses up along her jaw before nipping at her lips, his tongue sliding teasingly against hers. Her hand was still trapped between them but as Bucky shifted just that much deeper, she managed to free it and now she was clutching at his chest, nails sharp and clawing even through his shirt.

“I’ll give you what you want, doll. Don’t wanna’ hurt’ya,” He soothed, petting his flesh and blood hand down her side, watching the rise and fall of her breasts, nipples hard and peaked beneath the barely there lace of her teddy. “Look so damn pretty wrapped up like this, Stevie. _Lace?_ Never seen you look so delicate, so feminine, so goddamn _pretty._”

She whined, the sound higher than he’d ever heard her and Bucky grunted as she forced her hips down as much as she could. Christ, but she was _strong._ He sunk into her that much more and he moaned as she tensed and her body seemed to flutter around his length, just _begging_ him to move.

“M’not _delicate_,” She said suddenly, voice only a little petulant, what with it being breathy and more wanton than Bucky had ever remembered her sounding. “I c-can take you.”

“Oh, _darlin’_,” He breathed, rocking a little more into her. “I know you can, doll. So perfect for me, made for me, that’s what you are, baby doll.”

She moaned so loudly at that and Bucky pulled back from nibbling at her throat to watch as her lashes fluttered and she let out the prettiest whimper as he rocked in, burying himself inside her to the hilt. He couldn’t resist kissing her to what to her felt like to within an inch of her _life _as her muscles fluttered around him.

“_Bucky-_“ She whined between heated kisses and he grunted and hissed as she purposely clenched up around him.

He choked on a groan and there was a pleased gleam in her eyes when he pulled back enough to look at her. “Fuck me like you mean it,” She ordered and it was an order, heated and sure, not desperate not exactly but the desperation was just there, hidden beneath the surface and he never wanted her to want for anything ever again.

“Y-yeah, pretty,” He murmured, rocking his hips back a bit and prompting both of them to groan long and low as he pressed back in. “Anything you want, Stevie,” He breathed, readjusting his grip to hold onto the backs of her thighs, one bare, the other still wrapped up in her uniform. “Hold on, sweetheart.”

She did, her hands wound tightly in his hair, pulling him in close, just where she wanted him. She nipped and sucked at his bottom lip as he started up a rhythm, the heat instantly ramping up between them. She choked on her next breath as Bucky bottomed out and then _ground_ into her all rough and dirty. And it was maddening, truly. Bucky felt undone by this woman and it wasn’t the first time nor would it be the last, he was certain. “H-harder, Bucky. _Please_, I-you can-“

Bucky groaned and withdrew almost completely before fucking back in, choking on a breathy curse as she arched her back just so and somehow he was even _deeper _now. “_Oh, Christ, _Stevie. _Yeah_, that’s it doll, I got you,” He panted and he honestly couldn’t hold back any longer even if he tried.

He thrust into her harder and faster, watching in absolute delight as she threw her head back against the crumbling wall and cried out. He attacked her bared neck with sharp nips and sweet kisses and hot sucking kisses and she moaned and whined, _whimpered_ so perfectly for him over and over and _over_ again.

He wasn’t sure how long he could last with the way her body kept clutching at him, drawing him back for more and more. He never wanted to leave her tight heat, never wanted to stop kissing her, tasting her, listening to her sweet needy noises. She was covered in a sheen of sweat, her body glistening with it, little beads sliding from the back of her neck to settle against her bared collarbones. Her hair was a disaster, curls a perfect mess, golden hair matted to her temples, eyes wide and bright, lips bitten and so red, cheeks just as perfectly pink.

“You’re so goddamn perfect, pretty. So good, baby doll. So good for me, Stevie,” He mumbled against her parted lips.

They couldn’t really kiss any more, not with the way they were panting for their every breath, bodies heaving and covered in more than just sweat at this point. It brought him back a bit from his lust filled daze, recalling the events that had led them here in the first place. Led them to this moment.

He clutched harshly at her thighs, making her gasp and dig her nails into his scalp. He hissed at the sting and she instantly released him and he too forced his grip to soften. “You scared the ever loving _shit_ out of me, Stevie. Seein’ you-seein’ you fall like that, baby,” He admitted, resting his forehead against her collarbone, tucking his nose in against his throat to press open mouthed kisses there and lick up the beads of sweat that gathered there.

“M’sorry,” Stevie whimpered instantly and Bucky thrust into her sharply, making her whine and cry out with how _good_ it felt.

“Not your fault, pretty. Not your fault, scared me is all. N-never forget that look in your eyes, baby, scared me somethin’-“

“_Bucky-_“ She choked, interrupting him and suddenly gripping his jaw harshly, forcing him to meet her gaze.

There were bright tears in her pretty blue eyes and Bucky’s hips jerked of their own accord, her lashes fluttering. _Oh_, but she was pretty even roughed up a bit and with tears in those gorgeous eyes.

“‘M here, Buck, m’right here,” She gasped, biting harshly at his lower lip, making it sting and throb.

Bucky relished the bit of pain as he fucked into her just that much harder, faster. She felt too damn good to resist. “Yeah, doll. Yeah, you’re right here with me, baby,” He agreed, slipping his tongue past her lips and delving into her warmth.

She whimpered into his kiss as Bucky shifted his grasp again on her, slipping the metal arm around her lower back, supporting her entirely with only that, her shoulders pressed firmly back against the wall. And then he was slipping his free hand between them, fingertips ghosting lower to caress lightly between her legs.

He did not count on her entire body seizing and then jerking harshly in his grasp at the first touch to her clit.

She shouted out a curse and Bucky nearly lost his balance before he managed to right himself. “_Please-_“ She choked and Bucky groaned, rubbing his thumb against her clit roughly, bracing himself this time.

“You gonna’ come, pretty? Gonna come wrapped tight around my cock?” He breathed, voice low and dark and so damn hot.

Stevie whined and nodded frantically, practically writhing is his grasp, her nails back to digging crescents into his shoulders as she tried to fuck herself down onto him, get him deeper. Bucky let her, because why wouldn’t he? But then he was leaning back a bit to better see her, not wanting to miss it, his thumb swiping hard and fast against her sweet spot. He wanted to see her face lax with pleasure, not only hear but _see _his name fall from her lips.

“That’s it, doll,” He grunted, the tips of his fingers delving a little further down to trace around where he was pumping into her.

He could feel how stretched she was around him and he grunted at the bolt of heat that prompted to run through him. He renewed his efforts, fucking into her pointedly, searching out his release because she was close, so damn close. He could feel it in the way she was clenching up around him near constantly, whimpering and squirming, little _uh uh uh_’s escaping her.

He absolutely _needed_ to feel her coming around his cock. Right the fuck now.

He groaned as she flung her head back again and cried out sharply as his thumb swept over her clit at the same time he bottomed out and then she was coming, body tensing, her sweet cunt clenching around him almost _too_ tightly and Bucky hissed through his teeth as she fluttered around him, her walls clutching at him so warm and tight. He was seconds away from coming himself.

He cursed under his breath, biting out her name as her walls fluttering around him, her body shaking in his arms, pushed him into his own orgasm and it was startling in its intensity. It felt like his whole body was burning up with it. He was sure he’d never breathed so hard in his life, never felt so goddamn amazing at the same time, either. She was so slick and tight right then and he swore he could feel some of her slick dripping down his balls and onto his thighs; his come too. _Christ_, but he hoped so, could swear he felt each thrust fucking it in deeper, some escaping with each retreat.

She shuddered hard in his arms and Bucky groaned as she rode out her orgasm, soft little whimpers and _mews_ of pleasure escaping her puffy pink lips, kiss-bitten and wet from their kisses. He licked his lips, still pumping his hips in steadily slowing thrusts as he too rode out the waves of his pleasure.

All at once Stevie seemed to find her voice and she gasped out, hands moving to cup Bucky’s cheeks as she breathed his name reverently. Bucky could do nothing in the face of that voice, those eyes and lips. He leaned in and kissed her and he knew it was sloppy and too wet, no finesse behind it whatsoever but it was exactly what they both needed right then.

She didn’t realize it right away but she was petting idly over whatever bit of Bucky she could reach, hands fluttering up and over his shoulders and then back down his chest, only to skirt up his arms and pet weakly at his hair. Not that he was any better, petting along her side with his flesh hand, feeling her body tremble at his touch and he couldn’t resist pumping his hips forward once more, his cock still hard as anything and twitching inside her warmth.

She whimpered and broke their kiss and Bucky murmured a soft apology for more than just the oversensitivity he’d caused her right then. He carefully started to withdraw from her heat and couldn’t help the groan that escaped him when he finally slipped free. Her little whimper of discomfort had him momentarily worried he’d hurt her but she quickly hushed his worries and pressed a kiss to his his jaw.

He visibly relaxed and moved to carefully lower her back to the ground. She held fast to his shoulders, however, her legs feeling like jelly when her feet finally touched ground. She blushed hotly and Bucky grinned wolfishly at her as he helped her stay upright with a steadying hand on her bared hip.

His lips parted, eyes crinkling with amusement and fondness-_love-_and he was going to tell her how much he loved her, couldn’t not right then, really. Unfortunately, he didn’t get the chance. _Maybe later,_ he sighed inwardly.

“_Wow-_“ Tony blurted out of absolutely nowhere, voice strained. “That was so fucking hot.”

Stevie’s head snapped up at the sound of his voice and she almost bashed it against Bucky’s nose, only _Bucky_ had snapped his gaze to the spot behind him where Tony stood looking at them, a bright flush to his cheeks, the Iron Man suit absent save for the nanotech Arc Reactor in the middle of his chest.

_Well, _**_shit_**, Bucky thought absently, blowing outa rough breath. This ought to be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	26. Chapter 26

Stevie made an embarrassingly high noise in the back of her throat and Bucky licked his lips, entirely caught off guard. He really thought they were alone _aaand_ he really should have known better. He fumbled slightly with his tac pants and briefs, dragging them up hurriedly and tucking himself away. Unfortunately, poor Stevie couldn’t cover up so quickly and she hastily bent to shove her foot in the loose pant leg of her uniform, her legs still as shaky as a newborn foal’s.

Tony made a slightly apologetic sound but when Bucky glanced back at the man, he wasn’t exactly giving her any privacy, eyes only for Stevie as he licked his lips nervously.

“S-sorry,” He apologized, seemingly unable to look away. “I didn’t mean to interrupt. I was just-you weren’t replying over comms and I was getting a bit worried so I just...”

He trailed off and Bucky exhaled shakily when in the next moment Stevie let out a distressed whimper, not exactly moving to hide behind Bucky like he thought she might. No, instead, she was attempting to finish dressing and put some distance between her and Bucky. Which was-

“Stevie? Hey, it’s okay,” Bucky assured softly, watching as she managed to get her arms through her uniform, zipper only half done up as she snatched her boot up off the floor and shoved her foot into it. “Are you-“

She shot him a desperately quelling look and Bucky stopped himself, swallowing thickly as her gaze flickered between the two men, her brows pinched up, clearly distraught and ready to run. “I’m s-sorry, I’m-I can’t-“ She shook her head hastily and Bucky watched in mortification as tears sprang to her eyes and she hastily wiped at her cheeks when a few fell.

“_Stevie, _what-“ He started but she let out a choked sob and both he and Tony took a concerned step towards her.

“Don’t make me choose,” She pleaded. “_Please_ don’t make me choose,” She whispered, gaze flickering between them as she seemed to draw more into herself.

She looked ready to bolt, hand already outstretched and ready to scoop up her shield from where she’d dropped it against the wall. That’s when the words finally filtered in.

“What?” Tony breathed. “_Stevie_, we wouldn’t-“

“Choose between us?” Bucky interrupted, brows pinched in concern as he met Stevie’s worried gaze.

When she nodded, both Bucky and Tony took those few remaining steps towards her, Stevie taking a step back towards the wall again. She was shaking, Bucky realized and he licked his lips as he quickly shook his head.

“We could _never_ make you choose between us, doll. That-that’s not what-“ Bucky shook his head, unable to get the words out properly.

“We would never ask you to do something like that,” Tony breathed.

“T-then what is this-what was-“ She shook her head. “Tonight at the gala-“ She tried, gaze flickering between the pair. “You were both-and then I-“ She looked devastated as her gaze turned back to Bucky. “I can’t choose between either of you. I-it’s too much, I can’t lose either of you.”

“Oh, Stevie,” Tony sighed, voice quiet and Bucky shook his head slowly.

“You won’t, honey. You won’t lose either of us, you don’t have to choose, baby,” Bucky consoled, watching as Tony shifted closer to her, tentatively reaching out to try and bring her closer.

She looked spooked and sad, so confused and all they wanted to do was wrap her up in their arms and never let go. “I d-don’t-“ She shook her head. “I don’t understand.”

Tony bit his lower lip nervously and glanced to Bucky who breathed out slowly through his nose and met his gaze head on. “Tony and I have been...talking,” Bucky started slowly, glancing back to Stevie who was watching them both curiously.

She nodded a little at him to get him to continue and Bucky swallowed hard, looking to Tony for guidance.

“W-we’ve, well, Bucky figured out something a while ago,” Tony admitted, turning back to Stevie.

He let his gaze flicker over her trembling frame, how she tried to make herself appear smaller. He shook his head and smiled at her warmly. “I love you, Stevie,” He breathed shakily. “That’s what-that’s what Bucky figured out.”

Stevie froze, her eyes so wide, so round and filled to the brim with tears. Tony smiled at her warmly and gently clasped his hand over her elbow, drawing her a step closer to him. “I guess I was a little transparent,” He admitted, trying for a soft laugh but it fell flat when Stevie merely shook her head in disbelief.

“He’s been in love with you for a long time, doll,” Bucky murmured, trying to soothe her but all it seemed to do was remind her that she was in love with both men.

She startled slightly at the sound of Bucky’s voice and he smiled apologetically as Tony sighed and breathed, “Bucky sort of wins on that front though. Pretty sure he’s loved you for like, literally ever.”

Bucky couldn’t help chuckling softly at that but didn’t deny it, his soft adoring smile sort of spoke for itself.

Stevie could no longer contain her tears, didn’t even move to brush them away as they fell, too busy staring at them both with wide frightened eyes.

Bucky sighed softly and Tony gently squeezed her elbow. “Can you tell us what you’re thinking right now?” Tony prompted gently.

Stevie swallowed hard. “I’m n-not sure,” She admitted shakily. “I just...I l-love you both so much and I-I don’t know what-what to do or-“

Tony and Bucky exhaled heavily and Stevie clammed up instantly, lower lip starting to quiver. “Hey, _hey,_ none of that,” Bucky urged, not thinking twice about stepping in close and gently cupping her cheek. “It’s alright, Stevie.”

She inhaled sharply at his closeness and then Tony’s hand was gently smoothing up her arm. “We want to love you, Stevie. We _do_ love you...we’ve both just been stupid in trying to figure out just what that meant for our friendships, is all.”

Bucky nodded gently in agreement and Stevie blinked past her tears, those beautiful blue eyes jumping between them. “W-what does it m-mean then?” She asked quietly.

Tony smiled a little shyly at that, glancing away before he managed to bring his gaze back up to look at Bucky. Bucky, who was biting his lower lip gently and watching Tony with a blush rising to his cheeks.

“Maybe this isn’t the best place to-“

“Is everyone safe? What happened-“

“Everyone is safe,” Tony consoled. “The Team’s rounding up what’s left of the group. Doesn’t look like many...but everything’s fine. They’re managing the perimeter and cleanup.”

Stevie made a soft noise of understanding and seemed to relax a little at that. “S-so what does it mean?”

“Wouldn’t you like to wait until we get back home?” Tony tried gently but when she merely continued to stare at him...

“Well,” Tony started quietly. “Bucky and I were talking...and we uh, we realized something else.”

She frowned, gaze flickering between them curiously but didn’t ask, hoping that they’d eventually explain themselves.

“We realized,” Bucky continued for him. “That we were...sort of-“ He swallowed thickly. “_Interested_ in more than just being friends...with each other.”

Stevie’s lips parted, brows slightly pinched in confusion. “Y-you mean with me? B-both of you want that with me?”

Bucky licked his lips and looked to Tony, hoping for some help, clearly.

“Yes...” Tony said slowly, gaze still focused on Bucky but he brought his sharp gaze back to Stevie. “But we also...want to uh-“ He cleared his throat slightly. “Maybe pursue a relationship with each other-“

“Tony and I, he means,” Bucky managed and _ugh_ why did his voice have to come out more than a little nervous?

Stevie’s breathing hitched and she leaned back against the wall, clearly the only thing keeping her upright, now that Bucky and Tony were no longer touching her. Her eyes were wide and those still plump lips were parted in a slight _o _of surprise. Her eyebrows were maybe just a _tad_ higher than they had been before. _Maybe._

“_What?_” She breathed, voice barely above that of a whisper.

Bucky licked his lips nervously and flushed a little when Stevie’s eyes dropped to the motion for a second or two before snapping up to meet his eyes once more. “I might have been wrong when I said I wasn’t interested in fellas?” Bucky tried weakly and Stevie made a noise, one that may have been slightly akin to a dying animal.

“And I’ve sort of always had a proclivity for both sexes. You know, I _was_ considered a playboy once upon a time,” Tony offered, even if a bit sheepishly.

“_Oh-_“ Stevie finally managed, still wide eyed with maybe more than a bit of surprise.

“We’d like to be with you, Stevie, like to love you, is what we’re trying to say,” Bucky explained timidly. “And we’d also like to get to know one another...and maybe s-see where that uh, takes us.”

“_Oh-_“ She said again and Bucky’s smile turned a little crooked as he looked up at her through his lashes.

“You don’t have to tell us how you feel about all that right now, Stevie. But we’d like to get you home and then maybe we can sit down and talk about it?” Tony suggested gently, timid smile playing at his lips.

Stevie swallowed hard, gaze flickering between the pair. “Oh,” She whispered and both men’s gazes softened.

She was clearly overwhelmed.

“It’s okay, doll,” Bucky murmured, tone soft and consoling and Tony murmured something soft and reassuring. “Let’s get you home, yeah?”

She nodded, still apparently in a daze and then Tony glanced over his shoulder when he heard a commotion outside. “We should probably uh, get out of here. I muted my comm a while ago and uh...this definitely isn’t the best place for this kind of conversation,” Tony admitted, grinning a bit wryly at the way both Stevie and Bucky flushed. “Probably wasn’t the best place to get down and dirty-“

“_Tony-_“ Stevie pleaded and Bucky couldn’t help snickering softly under his breath.

“Sorry, I get it though. Life affirming sex is a thing so I won’t fault you for-“

“_Tony-_“ Bucky pleaded this time and Tony smiled sheepishly as he shrugged, flicking on his comm unit, still out of the suit but clad in his formal suit from the gala earlier.

“Yeah, we’re fine. Stevie took a little tumble-“ Tony started, Stevie making a soft embarrassed sound, his gaze immediately flicking to her. “Nothing to worry about, Bucky’s taken care of her.”

He winked and Stevie scrubbed a hand down her incredibly flushed face, Bucky seriously not doing any better as he coughed and covered his mouth to hide his blush _and_ smother his smile. “On our way, yeah, yep, _copy_-“ Tony went on distractedly, biting his lower lip as he softened his gaze, reaching up and muting his comm once more.

“C-can we uh...maybe continue this conversation when we get back to the Compound?” Tony asked again quietly. “I-if you’re not up for it tonight, we can-“

“If you say wait until tomorrow I might just have an aneurysm, Tony,” Stevie blurted and Tony grinned a little wryly at her and resisted the urge to rub the back of his neck.

“Yeah, probably best that I don’t say that then,” He admitted, Bucky and Stevie letting out soft huffs.

“Penthouse?” Tony offered and Stevie nodded, glancing quickly to Bucky and swallowing past the lump in her throat.

“Sure,” She agreed nervously. “I just-“ She seemed to squirm in place and Bucky’s gaze slipped down to where he could see her abs clenching...thighs too. “Can we go now?”

Bucky blinked and nodded slowly, Tony watching them both with a carefully blank face. “Right, yeah, let’s go,” Bucky said gruffly, suddenly very much aware of the fact that he was somehow still half hard in his tac pants.

Stevie made a noncommittal noise but she was already moving towards the front door hanging half off its hinges and partially obstructed by the awning. Both Bucky and Tony couldn’t help but notice she was walking a little stiffly and if her ass looked a little more firm as if she were flexing? _Well_, neither said anything...even if Tony raised a brow as if in question.

One Bucky didn’t have the courage to answer. Though, the flush high on his cheeks sort of spoke for itself. According to Tony’s smirk.

.

They made it back to the Compound without incident and they debriefed swiftly in the conference room and if both Bucky and Tony shared quiet looks with one another while Stevie did everything in her power to _not_ to look at them, _well,_ they tried not to take it too personally.

.

Stevie exhaled shakily when she felt eyes on her. She’d been hoping to disappear at least long enough to shower because the feeling of Bucky’s-

“Stevie?” Bucky queried softly and she just about jumped out of her skin when she realized just how close he’d managed to get to her without her noticing.

She startled badly and Bucky murmured a quiet apology as she spun to look at him, only to find Tony watching them with a raised eyebrow not two feet away. “Sorry, I-I was just going to go-“ She didn’t bother finishing her sentence as Bucky smiled up at her through his long lashes.

“Come on up with us, yeah?”

She swallowed hard, desperately trying not to squirm in place as she nodded and mumbled a quiet _okay._

Tony led the way after that and once they were tucked safely away in the spacious penthouse, everything just seemed that much more real.

“Why don’t you sit down?” Tony suggested gently, glancing to where Bucky was hovering at Stevie’s elbow and nodding to him as well. “Can I get you both a drink?” He asked, already heading for the kitchen.

“No-“ They both started and Stevie flushed lightly and finished with, “Thank you.”

Tony hummed softly and nodded before blowing out a long breath, gaze flickering between them as he pulled out a bottle of scotch. They weren’t looking at him right then, however, both just staring at one another as if daring the other to say something.

Tony tried not to roll his eyes as he poured a couple of fingers worth of scotch into a tumbler and added a couple of cubes of ice. “_Listen-_“ He tried, only to pause at Stevie’s hitched breath. “We don’t have to do this tonight, I already told you, Stevie. Today’s been-“

“A lot,” She agreed, swallowing thickly.

Tony nodded, Bucky’s soft hum accompanying it. He moved to sit down in the living room because he just couldn’t bare to do this on trembling legs. He really needed to sit the fuck down.

“I want to talk about it,” He heard her whisper barely a moment after.

There was a lengthy pause and the silence was near deafening to them all. “Are you going to go first, or?” Bucky trailed off, but Stevie was already grimacing and Tony let out an amused laugh.

“I love you both, I _have_ loved you both for _so _long and I didn’t-how can I-“ She growled out, pressing her hands to her face, squishing her palms against her eyes in frustration, her entire body practically _vibrating_ in place. “_God_, I am _awful _at this.”

Bucky barked out a surprised laugh startling them both, even himself a little bit. “_Stevie_,” He said helplessly, outstretching his hands to her.

She looked like she wanted to step closer, her hands having dropped to her sides but she was looking at him in embarrassed fondness and Bucky could do nothing but shake his head in exasperation. “_Stevie_, you’ve _always_ been awful at this. Don’t you think I know that?”

Stevie spluttered, blushing furiously and she truly couldn’t help but smile timidly at the man. “Don’t tease me, you jerk,” She mumbled and Bucky’s gaze softened when she grabbed her elbow, looking small and nervous, shy in a way he hadn’t seen in her in so long.

It broke his heart a little bit.

“Oh, you’ll know when I’m teasin’ ya’, doll,” He flirted and while Stevie’s blush intensified, Tony’s snicker sort of drew their attention.

“You two are so adorable together it’s making me kind of sick and a little jealous, but that’s not important. Because _you_-“ Tony addressed, gesturing to Stevie. “Said that you love me,” He breathed, smiling a little shyly. “And Bucky and I-” He breathed, biting at his lower lip a touch nervously. “Sort of shared a kiss earlier so there’s at least _something_ there. So I think there’s potentially-“

“You _kissed?_” Stevie blurted, rounding on the genius and if it came out far, _far_ squeakier than she intended, she hoped she would be forgiven because this was...this was _something_ alright.

“Uh...to be fair, Bucky kissed me first-“

“You licked your lips!” Bucky burst out, as if that were a plausible defence.

His eyes were wide and cheeks absolutely crimson at this point as well. “You were practically _begging_ me to kiss you!” He defended.

Tony guffawed and though he couldn’t exactly ignore Stevie’s wide-eyed stare, addressing Bucky sort of took precedence just then. “I did not _beg_ you to kiss me. Tony Stark does not beg,” He said defensively and when Bucky merely gave him a flat look as if he could see right through him. “Okay, I _maybe_ beg a little bit, but like, only when I really like the person,” He huffed indignantly.

Bucky smirked triumphantly and they both glanced back to Stevie to find her watching them with parted lips and wide dark eyes. “Can you kiss again?” She totally did not _squeak...again._

Bucky swallowed thickly and slowly turned to look back at Tony only to find the genius still looking at Stevie. “Do you _want_ us to kiss again?” Tony asked faintly, Bucky’s gaze flickering back to Stevie, eager to hear her response.

Stevie took a deep breath and nodded slowly. “I-I’ve thought-“ She started, only to seem to wish she could claw the words back in if the desperately panicked expression she wore was anything to go by.

“What was that?” Bucky asked quietly, taking a careful step towards her, watching in his periphery as Tony shifted to sit more comfortably on the sofa.

“N-nothing, I didn’t think anything-“ She clearly lied and Bucky’s lips quirked up in a little half smile.

He tilted his head as if in thought and hummed softly as he let his gaze rove over her features. “Did you think about us, doll?” He asked gently but there was a heat behind his words and he watched, _delighted_ when Stevie shivered at the tone of his voice.

“_No-_“ She denied, perhaps a little too hastily. “I m-mean I thought about being with you and-“ She cleared her throat slightly when her voice went a little higher than she cared for. “Being with Tony. But not l-like _together_-“ She squeaked, _again._

_Oh dear _ ** _lord._ **

“You are _so _bad at this,” Tony snickered from his spot on the sofa, spreading his legs a little and generally making himself more comfortable.

Stevie let out an embarrassed huff and trembled that much harder at Bucky’s closeness. “_So-_“ Bucky paused. “You’ve thought about us...together?”

“All three of us?” Tony prompted, you know, just for clarification.

Stevie swallowed hard and terrified she’d let out another embarrassing squeak, she forced herself to nod. Barely.

Bucky outright _groaned_ at the admission and Tony shivered at the sound, gaze momentarily flickering towards the brunet. “Want to tell us about it?” He asked, voice dropped low and then they both watched with satisfaction as Stevie shivered at the sound of it.

She shook her head a little, chewing her bottom lip nervously. “N-not yet.”

Tony hummed and nodded. “Sure, sweetheart, maybe in a little while.”

Bucky bit his lower lip lightly, casting his gaze towards the genius as he turned his attention back on him. “We had a plan, you know,” Tony sighed.

Bucky smirked and shook his head. “No we didn’t, we _wanted_ to make a plan, were totally in the process of _making_ said plan when those assholes-“

“_Language_,” Stevie interrupted automatically and both men rolled their eyes in unison.

“Decided to ruin our evening,” Bucky finished with a sigh.

Tony nodded, perhaps a little too enthusiastically. “Oh, _totally. _You know, after all the kissing, of course.”

Bucky rolled his eyes, wanting to smile dorkily at Stevie when she whispered faintly, “_Of course_.”

Tony’s smile was entirely too lopsided when he’d lowered his glass from taking a sip of his drink. “This is going _swell_,” Tony teased and Bucky grinned wryly at him.

“_Stevie,_” Bucky sighed. “Why don’t we sit down and-“

“I can’t-“ She blurted hastily and both men raised a brow at her.

“Why not, honey?” Tony asked, voice gentle, worried. “Did you actually-are you _injured?_” He blurted as if that possibility hadn’t occurred to him and truly, it hadn’t.

She’d _looked_ physically alright when he’d stumbled upon them doing the do but maybe she’d kept an injury a secret? Come to think of it, she hadn’t exactly sat down on the Quinjet _or_ in the conference room. Maybe she really was hurt.

“_No!_” She rushed out, voice shaky, hands flying up in a placating gesture. “No, I-I’m not hurt I just...”

Tony would later _swear_ that he thought she was turning into a tomato right then as she mumbled something too softly for him to hear under her breath.

Bucky on the other hand-

The absolutely filthy _noise_ he made in response to whatever she’d said had both Stevie and Tony’s heads snapping towards the man. Tony’s gaze grew insanely curious while Stevie looked absolutely _mortified _that he’d managed to hear her at all.

“_Oh God,_” Bucky choked and Stevie absolutely did not _whimper_ at the obvious arousal she could hear in his voice.

“W-what did she say?” Tony demanded, beyond curious now, gaze flickering back and forth. “_Bucky_-“ He said warningly. “What did she say?”

Stevie looked mortified still but she wasn’t bolting nor was that blush going anywhere and now it was starting to look more like an aroused flush and not simply one born out of embarrassment.

Bucky licked his lips, eyes practically boring into her as he breathed out shakily and whispered, “She can’t sit down...” Bucky started, taking yet another step closer to her, within arms reach now.

He shivered as Stevie let out another quiet whimper, shifting from one foot to the other. “Because she’s afraid...that she’s going to make a mess of your sofa.”

“Make a mess of my...” Tony trailed off, not entirely understanding.

They watched as Stevie looked between them both pleadingly, unable to voice _anything_ right then. Tony still a little clueless, apparently and needing it spelled out for him.

“She’s got my _come _drippin’ out of her, Stark. She’s been clenching since we got outta’ that fuckin’ coffee shop,” Bucky hissed, arousal clearly getting the better of him.

He palmed himself over his tac pants, grunting softly at the pressure and though Stevie saw him do it, Tony was too busy staring at Stevie with his jaw practically on the floor to notice. Stevie groaned softly, absolutely beyond embarrassed at this point as she tried to glare at Bucky but honestly, she was sort of enjoying the light humiliation the conversation was causing then.

“_Shit-_“ Tony cursed, revelling in Stevie’s soft whimper at his outburst. “You can make a mess of the sofa, sweetheart. Make a mess anywhere you like, _honestly-_“ He choked and then forced himself to swallow another sip of his drink in hopes his voice would sound a little more normal.

Stevie whimpered, lashes fluttering and they swore her legs were going to give out on her. She managed to firm them enough to prevent a trip to the floor and they were reluctant to admit they sort of wanted to see that.

“_Tony-_“ She breathed, sounding startled and more than a little aroused.

“You’re afraid of makin’ a mess on his nice sofa, doll...you afraid of him seein’ it too?” Bucky asked, reaching out to touch the strap of her shield harness.

She shuddered and felt as if she were being pulled in by Bucky’s gaze. She shook her head slowly and Bucky licked his lips, reaching up with both hands now to undo the harness. She let him, even helped him, watched as he took the shield and set it down, leaning it against one of the living room chairs.

She swallowed hard as he turned back to her, gaze trailing up along her frame. She was shaking and he stepped up into her space and gently lifted her chin with a couple of fingers, hovering his lips close to hers but not touching just yet.

“You nervous?” He murmured, knowing that Tony could hear them.

“Yes,” She breathed instantly and he smiled, gently nudging her nose with his.

“Me too,” He confessed and her gaze softened as she looked up into his eyes, because yeah...he was, she could see it.

Her shoulders dropped a fraction and he hummed softly. “Want to keep going? You can stop us at any time...we can actually sit and talk if you want-“

“We can keep going,” She assured and he smiled, pressing a gentle kiss against her lips, wanting to smirk as he pulled back and she swayed forward a little towards him.

“Alright, honey...you want to get rid of those boots for me?” He asked quietly, stepping back a little and moving to her side.

She nodded, gaze momentarily flickering to where Tony sat watching them both heatedly. She swallowed hard and bent to start unbuckling her boots instead of just tearing the damn things off.

It took her a moment and wasn’t exactly sexy. You can’t take boots off in a sexy way. Come to think of it, taking the suit off wasn’t exactly going to be sexy either. She huffed softly at the thought and glanced to Bucky, the brunet smirking and winking lightly when he seemed to catch on to what she was thinking.

When she hesitated, hand going towards the zipper at her throat, Bucky shook his head gently and stepped in behind her, confusing her for a moment as she tried to turn to look at him. He stilled her with a careful hand at her elbow.

“Look at Tony for me, doll. I’ll take care of the rest,” He promised, hand slipping from her jaw to grasp the zipper carefully.

He gently pulled at it and felt her shiver in his arms, gaze straying towards where Tony sat watching them both in silence. There were words on the tip of his tongue, he could see it and yet Tony kept quiet, letting his heated gaze speak for itself as Bucky dragged the zipper down over the swell of her breasts.

“You know,” Bucky started tentatively. “I never got to worship you properly in this body.”

Stevie’s breath caught at both the words and the fact that he’d managed to pull the zipper right down to her navel and now his hands were smoothing up along her stomach, both metal and flesh fingertips tickling at her bared skin. The teddy she’d worn beneath her dress could be barely called as such.

Bucky had torn it to shreds earlier and she knew Tony could see it, the way the lace was torn just above her belly button. “I don’t need to be worshipped-“

“You _deserve _to be worshipped, sweetheart,” Bucky breathed, breath hot against her ear, ruffling the blond strands and tickling her bared neck.

She shivered a little, long lashes fluttering for a moment before she opened her eyes again to look at Tony, unable to see Bucky what with him still standing at her back. “Never got the chance-“ Bucky murmured.

Tony hummed, drawing both of their gazes. “What a shame.”

Bucky nodded, pressing a gentle kiss to the underside of her jaw. “I felt worshipped that night, Bucky. I felt worshipped every time you even so much as _looked_ at me,” She breathed. “And that was before the serum and every time after.”

Bucky’s gaze dropped to her lips as she spoke the last part to the side. “Would worship you at your feet if it made you happy, doll.”

She shivered a little and then his hands were smoothing up along her breasts, over the lace where her suit was parted. “I would be happier at yours,” She confessed, her eyes closing as his hands clasped the edge of the suit and pulled it down over her shoulders and further along her arms.

“Bet she’d look pretty on her knees for you,” They both heard Tony whisper.

Stevie made a soft inquisitive sound and Bucky’s hands stilled from where they’d settled against her hips, the top of her uniform pulled down and riding low on those gorgeously slim hips. “I’m sure she would,” Bucky agreed quietly.

Tony hummed thoughtfully from the safety of the couch, watching as Bucky’s hands grasped the edge of her uniform and tugged.

She closed her eyes, embarrassed and nervous and positively _shaking _with it as Bucky knelt down behind her to help her the rest of the way out of the uniform.

She could feel his heavy exhale against her hip, both hands skimming lightly up the backs of her now bared thighs. She shivered, eyes never straying from Tony as his gaze seemed to turn that much darker, that much sharper.

“_Gorgeous_,” They heard him breathe and she knew she was blushing hotly right then, could feel the warmth of that flush right down to her belly.

Bucky sighed airily, hands now skimming up along the tender skin of her hips before he settled both palms against her sides. She must have made a sound, a quiet noise of want, no doubt, because Bucky’s hands flexed against her, the sound of the metal plates shifting making her knees feel suddenly far too weak...and she was _still _clenching, thighs tensed and pressed tightly together.

“You hear that, doll?” Bucky practically purred in her ear and she nodded almost imperceptibly. “Shouldn’t you say _thank you_ for such a nice compliment?”

“_Thank you-_“ She breathed sharply and Tony’s eyes widened, a soft growl seeming to start in his chest making both Stevie and Bucky shiver.

“So polite,” Tony murmured, almost absently, eyes crinkling a little despite his smile never growing.

“She is gorgeous,” Bucky agreed quietly, trailing the metal hand up from his coveted spot at her waist to caress lightly along her abdomen with the backs of his knuckles. “And polite.”

Tony hummed softly under his breath and watched then as the metal hand smoothed lightly over her breasts before grasping lightly at her jaw, turning her head to the side. “_Bucky_-” She whispered, bright blue gaze desperately seeking his.

He exhaled shakily and shifted to press himself against her side before he let his lips finally connect with hers. She moaned at the first press of his lips against hers and it wasn’t by any means a perfect kiss, not with the way he only managed to reach one corner of her mouth. But the heat was there, the desire. He could feel her whole being shiver with _want_ and he found himself hard pressed not to press himself firmly against her hip just so she could _feel_ what she was doing to him.

She whimpered and he felt her dip a little before she managed to catch herself, stop herself from falling to her knees. “M’right here, Stevie,” He whispered, lips barely skimming against hers as he pulled back, shifting to press himself flush against her back instead.

She shivered and Bucky hummed as he let his gaze flicker over her shoulder to where Tony was sitting forward in his seat, now empty glass abandoned at his side and elbows resting on his knees. His gaze was piercing, _hungry_ and Bucky felt his cock twitch at the sight. So did Stevie.

She moaned softly and Bucky’s gaze flickered back to her profile, clearly unable to help himself, he ground his rapidly growing erection against her ass. This time they _both_ moaned softly at the feeling and Tony licked his lips from across the room, exhaling roughly.

“You’re so beautiful together,” He sighed, so much awe, adoration and _lust_ colouring his voice that Bucky could do nothing save close his eyes and _breathe_ for a moment or three. “You were always meant to be together...”

“_Tony-_“ Stevie whispered, hearing the _longing_ in his voice, but Tony merely shook his head, a smile tugging at his lips.

“That bodice has seen better days,” He said instead and Stevie huffed softly, glancing down at herself.

Naked now, save for the top of the ripped teddy, she felt vulnerable and more nervous than she’d _ever _been and that was saying something.

“Want me to take it off?” Bucky murmured, lips ghosting against the shell of her ear.

She nodded stiltedly and Bucky hummed, pleased by her answer. She didn’t get more than a moment before Bucky’s flesh and blood hand was sliding up beneath the remnants of the bodice and with barely more than a flex, the delicate fabric was giving right up the middle. She could do nothing to stop the slight gasp she took as the lace fell to the floor at their feet.

Tony groaned-_loudly-_at the sight of her completely naked before him, flawless and beautiful, flushed and breathing heavily while Bucky’s flesh and blood hand shifted to caress lightly over her stomach, abs tensing and twitching beneath his palm.

“So goddamn gorgeous,” Tony muttered, watching the pair intently.

Stevie trembled as Bucky’s metal hand came up to ghost teasingly over her breasts, the coolness of the metal making her gasp as it brushed against her nipples. She jerked slightly and he cooed softly in her ear as the palm of his hand skated farther up to then cup the base of her throat, just _holding_ her there.

She was panting as if she’d been running and Bucky breathed out slowly against the back of her neck, pressing a kiss to all that curly hair. “Easy, doll,” He whispered, trailing his warm fingertips along her trembling abs, darting lower only to come right back up with small teasing circles.

She whimpered and he smirked lightly, looking to Tony over her shoulder. “Look at him, yeah? Look at what you’re doin’ to him, baby girl.”

She shuddered in his grasp and could only moan as she _did _let herself look at Tony. _Tony_ who was sitting on his sofa, legs spread and looking positively _ravenous _as he watched them, his wide dark eyes raking along her frame with an intensity she felt powerless in the face of.

“You have no idea what you do to me, Stevie,” Tony whispered and Stevie’s gaze fell helplessly to where the man had shifted to recline back more on the sofa and was palming himself deliberately slow.

Bucky’s breath shuddered out of him when he too caught sight of Tony touching himself and then Stevie was gasping softly when Bucky’s hand on her belly shifted lower, fingertips ghosting along the downy soft hair between her legs.

She choked on her next breath, hands coming up to grasp at his metal forearm that felt like a brand across her chest, the metal palm warm against her throat. “You still wet, baby? Still got me inside’a you?”

Stevie positively _mewled _in response and Bucky’s hand stilled, curled lightly between her legs, just feeling her warmth, the heat of her. “_Yes-_“ She gasped and Bucky exhaled shakily and licked his lips.

“Why don’t you relax, honey? Huh? Let us see the mess I made, hmm?” He coaxed, voice breathy and so deep, Stevie thought she’d be carried under.

She stopped fighting it almost immediately, her muscles relaxing, breath escaping her in nothing short of a shaky exhale. She could feel Bucky’s come trickling down between her legs as if he’d just pulled out. When he had _actually_ pulled from her body, she’d known what would happen, could _feel_ it begin to drip from her but she’d clenched up almost instantly and dressed. Thanks to the serum, she had incredible control over her body now and it truly had come in handy.

She moaned desperately as the hand Bucky had curled between her legs shifted, his middle finger delving and sliding through her slick, parting her folds. She felt as if she were on fire with Tony’s heated gaze pinning her, Bucky’s arms around her, his heat at her back. His fingers felt cool in comparison to the heat between her legs.

There was a groan suddenly in her ears and then Bucky was shifting against her, fingers leaving her only to then drag the wetness up over her hip. The arm he had across her chest tightened that much more, hand flexing carefully at her throat before Bucky’s hand, still tacky with her slick, came around to grasp at one perfectly round cheek.

She trembled and whimpered as his hand didn’t linger and instead slipped lower between her cheeks. She was entirely unprepared for him to slide two fingers through the mess growing between her legs only to then press those fingers up into her core.

She cried out, startled and beyond desperate for more as Bucky made her rock up on her toes, panting through the feel of him touching her there and in doing so, spread her legs a touch wider, revealing her milky white thighs now glistening with her slick, her come and Bucky’s too.

Tony grunted softly and Stevie’s eyes snapped open at the sound, unaware that she’d even closed them. She found the genius gripping himself tightly through his dress slacks, lips parted and cheeks flushed with arousal, lust lighting up his features. She whimpered and squirmed against Bucky as he continued to delve those fingers deeper inside her, curling them and _oh God_ but she could hear the wet squelching noises she was making and she mewled pitifully, embarrassed and a little humiliated.

But in a good way?

It was all so confusing and she moaned out Bucky’s name as he carefully withdrew his fingers and when he casually wiped the majority of the mess on her hip, she shuddered and turned her head at the same moment he raised those still damp fingers to his lips. The groan he gave was absolutely pornographic and this time her legs _did_ wobble and she started to fall.

Of course Bucky caught her, arm snaking around her waist as the metal hand shifted to grab her shoulder, still holding her across her heaving chest. “Shh-_shh_, honey,” He whispered, pressing a warm and suspiciously wet kiss to her temple. “You’re alright, doll. So pretty for us, so gorgeous and strong. You think you can walk to Tony? I’ve never seen such a hungry look on a man’s face, baby. He looks like he’s gonna’ die a thirst if he doesn’t get a taste’a you, sweetheart.”

Stevie whimpered and shuddered as Tony groaned, shifting in his seat, hand falling away from between his legs. It was true though, somewhat anyway. Stevie didn’t think she’d ever seen such a look on his face, let alone anyone else’s before, not even Bucky. Though, if she were to turn right then, she would.

She nodded when Bucky made a softly questioning sound and as soon as she did so, legs firming up beneath her, she realized what he’d asked of her. She blinked and swallowed hard, turning her head to the side in hopes that Bucky would give her some sort of strength or guidance as to what she was supposed to do when she got to him. Because she didn’t exactly know if she was capable of functioning on her own just then.

But Bucky had called her _strong_ and she was strong.

“Stevie?” Bucky murmured, drawing her focus back on him.

Instead of speaking she tipped her chin a little and pressed a kiss to the edge of his mouth, her lips only just brushing against his. Truly, it wasn’t much of a kiss but the way Bucky groaned into it, shifting to grasp her jaw and _force_ her head back into some semblance of a _proper_ kiss was absolutely _everything _right then.

She let herself melt a little into it as his tongue slipped between her parted lips but all too soon he was pulling away, leaving her feeling dazed and unsure. He carded a hand through her unruly curls and smiled warmly at her.

“You doin’ okay, doll?”

Stevie shivered but nodded slowly. “Yeah,” She sighed, her gaze slipping from Bucky over to Tony, the brunet still very much watching intently. “I want to go to him.”

Bucky’s smile was so fond it hurt Tony’s heart a little bit to see it. Stevie of course, was too busy to notice now that her gaze was settled on Tony. “Go on then,” Bucky murmured and only when he was sure she had her footing, did he release his grasp on her.

...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bwahaha, sorry for another cliffhanger. xD I really need to stop doing those. <3 Thanks for reading, hope you're still enjoying it!


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for sticking with me this far! I hope you love the ending as much as I do! Sorry it took me so long to finish and I'm sorry if there are spelling errors and stuff towards the end. I didn't have time to edit it and I really wanted to just get it posted for you. <3 So it's a bit raw, but enjoy it nevertheless. <3

Stevie didn’t move right away, her gaze flicking over Tony’s frame before her eyes seemed to darken as she forced herself to meet his gaze.

“Are you just going to stare?” Tony called, aiming for teasing but his voice was so shaky and nervous that it made Stevie unconsciously take a step towards him.

“I-“ Stevie whispered, swallowed hard and then took another step towards him. “I thought I might try something different this time...I’m tired of only looking.”

Tony exhaled heavily at the words and when his shoulders dropped, hands twitching from where she could see them resting atop his thighs, she knew she couldn’t keep him waiting any longer. Especially as he breathed, “So am I.”

Within moments she was standing before him, never truly having been far away in the first place. But that small distance between them had already been too much. She hoped there wouldn’t be any distance between them soon enough.

Tony reached out to her, palm upturned, gaze soft and adoring as she seemed to freeze right there within arms reach. He wanted to pull her into his lap, kiss her, touch her, confess to her and he would, but she wasn’t ready to let him do that just yet.

She carefully took his trembling hand in hers but she didn’t let him pull her closer.

With a sharp inhale, Tony watched as she sank to her knees right there on the penthouse floor at his feet. Her lashes fluttered as she brought his hand to her cheek, cradling it against her heated skin as she just _breathed._

“_Stevie-_“ Tony said breathlessly, cupping her cheek with reverence.

“I love you,” She murmured, lashes fluttering and revealing those gorgeous blue eyes, filled with longing and desire and so much love, Tony was sure it would choke him.

He exhaled roughly as the words washed over him and carefully brushed his thumb along her parted lower lip. “You have to know by now, darling...that I love you just the same.”

Her impossibly long lashes fluttered at his confession and the softest of whimpers escaped her as she pressed a sweet kiss to his thumb. When she gathered her strength enough to open her eyes again, she couldn’t resist leaning up into Tony’s space a moment later.

When Tony’s lips found hers, everything fell quiet, even the pounding of her heart, the blood rushing in her ears, it all disappeared when his lips met hers. It was wonderful and perfect, everything a kiss should be. It all just fell away as his hands found her cheeks, hers his chest. Tony cradled her with a reverence Stevie never thought she’d deserve and yet, she held on to him as if he were her dream come true.

And when she felt Bucky’s presence at her back, not imposing, not inserting himself into their moment, but hovering on the periphery, quiet, patient, it only made her realize that this _was_ her dream come true. To find her loves, to be with them, to give herself up to them completely.

She whimpered at the realization and clutched at Tony a little tighter, the genius’ tongue effortlessly parting her lips and tasting her, letting her taste him. It was sweet and searching, each wanting to learn the taste and _feel_ of one another more than anything else right then.

Slowly, sounds started to filter back in around them and Stevie gasped as Tony broke their kiss with a series of shorter kisses, chaste ones as he let his hands pet comfortingly at her hair, smoothing down her messy curls. She swallowed hard as she opened her eyes and was met with him smiling at her and looking just as dazed as she felt. Just as _in love_ as she felt.

“I never want to stop kissing you,” He whispered, his voice sounding suspiciously hoarse as he pushed a few curls back behind her ear.

Stevie bit down on her lower lip as she looked up at this incredible man. “You never have to.”

Tony smiled, his eyes sparkling with it and when Bucky exhaled a little shakily from behind her, she shivered lightly, lashes fluttering when his voice reached her ears. “You’ll have to let me kiss you sometime, doll. Though, seeing you two kiss is really workin’ for me.”

Stevie blinked a little dazedly as she turned to glance at him through her long lashes. She couldn’t help the soft noise of want from escaping her as Bucky let his gaze rake hungrily over her naked frame.

“You two looked pretty damn gorgeous together back in that coffee shop,” Tony admitted quietly, his lust blown gaze tracking them both eagerly. “Think I’d love a repeat performance,” He admitted.

Stevie exhaled shakily and although she kept her gaze focused intently on Bucky, they both didn’t miss the way her hand tightened slightly in the fabric of Tony’s shirt.

“Can I kiss you, doll?” Bucky asked, head tilted slightly as if in thought as he gazed down at her.

A soft noise escaped her at that and then she was rising, as gracefully as ever, to stand between Tony’s legs. She didn’t leave the safety of them either, merely turned in Tony’s space, the genius’ hands moving to grasp lightly at her hips as she turned to face Bucky.

The brunet was gazing at her lovingly and she swallowed thickly as she nodded. “Whenever you want,” She breathed and Bucky groaned softly, stepping in closer, his metal hand reaching out to grasp at the back of her neck.

He dragged her in closer at that and revelled in her hitched breath and soft moan as he stole her lips in a desperate kiss.

It was nothing like the desperation they’d experienced only an hour or so ago, but it was all consuming and passionate all the same. Tony watched helplessly from his spot on the sofa with wide dark eyes and a growl building in his throat. _God_, but they were so fucking gorgeous together. His cock was twitching almost constantly in his slacks and he _really_ needed to get naked and so did Bucky. Although…he was sort of enjoying the contrast of all that pale skin against Bucky’s black tactical gear.

He let his eyes wander over their faces as they kissed but when Stevie’s knees wobbled slightly and Bucky shifted to help support her, Tony had just about enough of the watching. For now, anyway.

He leaned in, squeezing lightly at her perfect hips before he was pressing a hot open-mouthed kiss to her fluttering abs.

She moaned into Bucky’s mouth and Tony licked his lips as he pulled back, glancing up the length of her body for a brief moment and admiring the pretty curve of her breasts. Her nipples were hard and a dusky pink and when he leaned in to lick a wet stripe just beside her belly-button, she jerked in surprise against him, her hands instantly flying to wind themselves into his darker hair.

He grunted softly when her nails scratched lightly at his scalp but her whispered apology wascut off by a whimper as he latched his mouth onto the soft spot below her navel and sucked.

She curled over him in surprise, the kiss with Bucky entirely broken, though he didn’t seem to mind, not with the way Stevie was responding to Tony’s teasing mouth. He groaned loudly when an idea suddenly struck him and caught Tony’s gaze. He winked at him and Tony’s dark brows furrowed for an instant before Bucky’s flesh hand was gripping Stevie’s curls and tugging her back upright.

She cried out in surprise and Bucky apologized sweetly before he was tugging her away from Tony. Tony watched with wide eyes as he turned her around so that now he was treated to the view of her flawless back and perfect ass-

He _groaned_ so loud and so long that the noise seemed to startle Stevie, despite her being currently distracted by Bucky’s wicked mouth and his guiding hands but there was nothing for it. Because Bucky was sitting down on the edge of the coffee table and pulling her down by the back of her neck, exposing her a little more to him. But when she went to kneel down, probably more than a little self conscious of the position, Bucky made an _ah, ah_ sound and she instantly stilled.

Her cheeks were beet red when Bucky broke their kiss and he watched in delight as she seemed to squirm in place and a look further down told him that she was embarrassed beyond belief as her legs were currently pressed tightly together, blocking Tony’s otherwise perfect view.

“Oh, _honey_,” Bucky said, putting as much sympathy into his voice as he could manage, lightly grasping her elbows and urging her to bend further.

She shuddered at the sound of his voice as she was forced to put her hands out and brace them against Bucky’s abdomen as he laid back on the coffee table. “You embarrassed to let Tony see you like this? Let him see how much of a _mess_ I made you?” He cooed and Stevie whined, dropping her head for a moment and shutting her eyes tightly.

Bucky outright _grinned_. “Yeah, that’s it, doll, isn’t it?”

She nodded weakly and shivered when she felt a soothing hand that was definitely not Bucky’s, lightly plant itself against her lower back. “No need to be embarrassed, darling,” He consoled and she nearly jumped out of her skin when she felt Tony’s warm breath against her backside.

“_Ohhh-_“ She whimpered, shifting from foot to foot and Tony and Bucky shared a look over her shoulder as she collapsed down onto her elbows on top of Bucky.

“You want Tony’s mouth on you, pretty?” He asked, trailing both hands lightly down her sides and making her tremble. “Never got to do that with you, baby doll, yeah?”

She moaned wantonly and nodded. Because she _did_ want that, _so fuckin’ badly _but that would mean that he’d-

“Look at _you_,” Tony murmured in awe and it startled her from her thoughts and when she felt his warm hands curling around the tops of her thighs, urging them slightly apart, she whined high and needy, because he was _looking at her._

“Bet she looks fuckin’ pretty,” Bucky muttered and Stevie’s gaze opened to fix upon him because he sounded so goddamn _wrecked_ already. “Wet and open, c’mon Tony, you’re killin’ me here-“

“She is,” Tony breathed on a groan, cursing lowly under his breath and Stevie mewled when she felt his panting breaths against her sensitive skin. “_God_, Stevie. You’re _glistening_ with his come. I-“

He choked on his next breath, arousal practically strangling him as he adjusted his grip on her, his thumbs parting her cheeks and forcing her to widen her stance for him. Because she was so goddamn _slick_ and he-

He didn’t give himself a chance to think through his next move. He pressed in eagerly and dragged his tongue through the mess of their release.

The absolutely _wounded_ sound that clawed its way up and out of her throat would forever be a noise he’d strive to elicit in her again and again.

He licked into her cunt, thumbs pulling her open wider as he sucked on her lips and he knew he was making positively _lewd_ sounds in doing so but he seriously couldn’t find it within himself to care, not when she was squirming and crying out, her insides fluttering around his tongue as he pointed it and pressed it as deep inside of her he could get.

She’d fallen completely down onto Bucky and the brunet was running soothing hands up along her sides, over her trembling frame. “Oh, _darlin’_,” He breathed, nuzzling at her sweaty temple. “’S it feel good, huh? He’s got you whinin’ for it so sweetly, baby.”

And it was teasing and humiliating and she was fucking loving every second of it.

Tony groaned against her and slipped both of his thumbs inside of her, wanting to tug her open wider. “_Christ_, honey. You’re already so open, bet I could just slide right in,” He mused.

They were both surprised when she shoved herself up onto unsteady hands and looked back at him with big pleading eyes and begged, “_Please._”

Tony groaned and nipped harshly at her cheek, making her cry out at the bit of pain. “That what you really want, Stevie?” He asked, breath hitching in his throat when he stood up and ground his erected, stilly trapped in his slacks against her backside and he _knew_ she was getting slick all over them and it just made him all the hotter for it.

She whimpered and nodded, lowering back to her elbows on Bucky’s chest. The brunet was watching her with wide hungry eyes of his own and she shuddered as she leant forward and kissed him soundly and somewhere in between their panting breaths, gasps and messy kisses she managed to get out, “I want it, I want it-g-give it to me, _please, Tony._”

And truly, Tony could never say no to her, he only wished that-

“We didn’t even make it to the bedroom,” He blurted, startling a hoarse laugh out of Bucky.

Stevie burst into laughter at that as well, even if it was breathy and stifled against Bucky’s glorious pecs.

“I honestly do not care what available surface you fuck me on right now, Tony. There’ll be time to find a bed later, I just-“ She whined a little through clenched teeth as she gritted out, “I just want your cock in me.”

Both men groaned loudly at the admission and within moments Bucky was manhandling her up and off the table. He pushed her back onto the sofa and she fell against it with a sharp exhalation and gazed up at Bucky as he started tearing off his tac gear.

“Get undressed, Tony,” He said gruffly, eyes never leaving their exploration of Stevie’s gorgeous body. “You heard the lady.”

Tony huffed out a breath but he was already stripping so at least he was taking the suggestion to heart, even if he muttered under his breath, “Didn’t sound like a lady.”

Stevie let out an embarrassed whimper and squeezed her legs shut in mortification. “_Sorry-_“ She gasped and Tony growled at her, kicking off his shoes and shoving his pants, briefs and socks to the floor, Bucky already naked and standing beside him, that damned metal hand wrapped around his cock.

“Don’t be sorry, darling,” Tony admonished, shoving the coffee table back a few feet before practically _prowling_ towards her. “I like that you’re hungry for my cock.”

Stevie whimpered, clenching around nothing and shutting her eyes tightly against the bolt of lust that shot through her. _God,_ but he was too much.

She was startled when a careful hand wrapped around her ankle and upon opening her eyes, she found Tony standing by her feet, one knee braced against the sofa, the other foot flat on the floor.

“Seeing Bucky push you around a bit has me wanting to be a little rougher with you,” He admitted and he did not fail to miss the shudder that wracked through her at his confession.

“Y-yeah?”

Tony hummed, gaze flickering to where Bucky was still stroking himself lazily as he watched the pair. “Yeah, honey. You going to let me?”

She took a moment to think about it, her gaze flickering over his frame, the strength in his arms, the glow of the arc reactor, his abs flexing and she almost groaned when she let herself take in the sight of his cock. She thought she must be drooling and she instantly snapped her gaze up to meet his only to find him smirking and raising a brow at her in question.

“Well?”

She swallowed thickly and nodded, because yeah, she’d liked when Bucky manhandled her and she knew she was going to love it when Tony did the same. “Yeah,” She sighed breathily and Tony’s smirk evened out, the heat in his eyes only intensifying.

“_Good girl,_” He murmured and watching in satisfaction as she whimpered and shut her eyes tightly.

Bucky grunted out a soft noise and licked his lips, finally letting go of his cock for a moment to lean down over her and grasp her by the chin, tilting her head back so that she could look up at him properly.

“Tony’s going to fuck your pretty cunt, doll and I’m gonna’ stuff this pretty mouth,” He mumbled before kissing her.

He couldn’t help groaning at the taste of her and licked into her mouth hungrily as she whimpered and melted beneath him. But she’d barely had time to sink into it before she was being torn away from him with a startled yelp.

Tony growled as he flipped her on the sofa and Bucky wasted no time in grasping her bicep and hauling her up the length of the couch a bit until she was at the armrest. She was panting open-mouthed as he wound his flesh and blood hand into her hair and tugged her up. She scrabbled at the armrest for a moment, trying to find her balance.

She shoved herself up onto her hands and knees and shouted in surprise, jolting forward when Tony landed a stinging slap to her hip. Tony groaned from behind her and she struggled to try and look back at him, Bucky only just releasing his grasp on her curls to let her do that much and _only_ that much.

“Tony, _please_,” She whimpered, biting her lower lip so hard it turned near white.

Tony blew out a slow breath in an attempt to steady himself. He’d never been so hard in his goddamn life and he was having a bit of a moment staring at all that perfectly flushed Irish skin, skin reddened and pinking up where he’d just slapped her. _Another time, Tony_.

He grasped at her hips tightly and then ran soothing hands up the length of her spine as she trembled and moaned beneath his hands. “I’m going to give you what you want, darling,” He promised and she swallowed thickly and she was about to beg him again, he could see it in her eyes, but Bucky quickly cut her off when he tugged her head slightly back to make her look up at him.

“You’re so good for us, pretty,” He murmured and watched pleased as her eyes snapped down to where his cock was jumping mere inches from her face.

“I can practically see you drooling,” Tony murmured and Bucky chuckled as she whined in shameful arousal, eyes squeezing shut against the feeling.

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” Bucky consoled. “We like it and we know it feels good, being a little humiliated. We’ll take care’a you, don’t you worry,” He promised, gentling his grasp on her hair and caressing her lightly.

She believed him, believed _them_. They’d take care of her.

Tony’s hands squeezed at her hips once and then they were sliding back and down between her cheeks. “If you want a condom, honey, now’s the time to sa-“

“_No!_” She practically shouted, looking back over her shoulder at him.

Tony hummed and soothed her, leaning down over her to press a kiss to her cheek. “I hear you, sweetheart, no need to yell.”

She whimpered and nodded, her sudden tenseness instantly fading as she dropped her head back down between her shoulders, her hair a messy tangled mess of curls that curtained her features for a moment.

Bucky hummed softly under his breath and she tipped her head up to look at him with wide adoring eyes as he swept her hair over her shoulder to fall to one side. “There you are, pretty,” He whispered and watched as her eyes practically welled up with tears.

She was shuddering in the next moment, however, when Tony pressed in closer, teasing his cock between her cheeks and leaving trails of sticky pre-come against her flushed skin. “You ready for him, Stevie?” Bucky asked quietly, voice having gentled.

She nodded and choked out a barely audible yes and Bucky smiled and glanced to Tony over her head. He nodded.

Tony let out a slow breath but was just as soon sucking in one as he pressed the head of his cock against her and pressed inside. Heat. She was so goddamn hot inside, slick and tight. She was shaking and whimpering beneath him and he ran soothing hands down her hips as they both cooed reassurances to her. Praise.

She whined, high and reedy and Tony was entirely unprepared for her to shove her hips back onto him, pretty well impaling herself on his cock. He shouted in surprise, hands suddenly clutching at her hips and gripping her tightly, his grip no doubt bruising.

“_Steve-_“ He choked. “_Easy, _**_fuck_**,” He growled, grinding into her and making her mewl in pleasure.

And it was surely all pleasure if the blissed out look on her face was anything to go by. Her lips were parted, panting breaths escaping her and _oh_ but she was sweating, glistening with it now. She moaned and was surprised when Bucky’s metal hand grasp her chin oh so carefully and lifted it slightly.

“You ready for me too, doll?” He asked gruffly, gaze flickering between watching her facial expressions and Tony fighting for control over himself, clearly ready to lose it now that he’d gotten a taste of her.

“_Yes,_ oh, _Bucky _**_please_**_,_” She whimpered and tried to press forward.

He slipped his hand into her hair and held her still, growling softly as he gripped the base of his cock and pressed the head teasingly light against her parted lips. Tony grunted behind her when she clenched down on him, the moment Bucky’s cock had touched her lips. He forced himself to breathe steadily through his nose as he watched those perfectly pink lips stretch wide around the head of Bucky’s cock as he slowly started to feed it to her.

Bucky cursed and even though it was in Russian, they knew a curse when they heard it. He inhaled sharply through his nose, practically hissing in his next breath when she started to suck before he’d even gotten half of his dick wet. He groaned as he pulled his hips back and then thrust forward just that much more.

She _mewled_ around him, there was no other word for it. Her cheeks were flushed and her throat stretched and taut as Bucky held the base of his cock with one hand and tightened the other in her long locks.

So of course they were both startled, clearly lost in the movements, their own pleasure, whenTony started to pull back excruciatingly slowly.

Stevie’s eyes shot open, not having been aware of even closing them and in the next moment she was whining so loud and so drawn out as Tony thrust a little harder back inside her tight heat. Bucky moaned almost in time with Tony as he bottomed out, Stevie having forced herself forward to take more of Bucky’s cock into her mouth, barely grazing the back of her throat. _Thank you, no gag reflex. _She thought wildly.

“Oh, _darling_,” Tony moaned, starting to fuck her properly, the slap of skin still muted and dull but he knew it would change soon enough.

She whimpered around Bucky’s cock and each time Tony bottomed out, she tried to take Bucky into the back of her throat. He was just so _big_. Her lips were stretched obscenely wide and Bucky couldn’t take his eyes off her even if he tried and he _did_ try, wanting to see Tony lost in her body, the feel of finally getting inside her.

He shuddered hard and thrust his hips forward, clearly unexpectedly and she whimpered and inhaled sharply through her nose, her hands coming up to clutch at his thighs, nails digging in and making him jerk.

“Fuck, _Stevie_,” Bucky choked, starting to fuck her mouth properly, hand tight in her hair not pushing or pulling, just holding on to her as he started rocking his hips.

She was mewling and _definitely_ drooling around him now that he’d picked up the pace and he knew he wasn’t going to last long at all. Not with the way Tony’s thrusts were bouncing her against him while he thrust into that gorgeously tight throat.

But when he saw a tear glistening on her cheek when she next blinked her eyes open, he growled, the sound feral and desperate with the need to come _right the fuck now_ and Tony’s gaze snapped to him at the noise.

“You gonna’ come already?” Tony asked, voice breathless and awed, even if it was dripping with lust.

Bucky grunted and nodded and of course when Stevie realized this, she started to try and fight his grip and choke herself on his cock, desperately wanting him to come. “Fuck, fuck, _fuck,_” Bucky hissed and Tony groaned at the sight of her forcing his cock down that gorgeous throat.

He bent over her back still fucking steadily into the heat of her, the fluttering of her walls, the occasional clench making him see stars and yeah, _okay_, he wasn’t exactly going to last much longer either. But he couldn’t not take her with him.

He reached under her and grasped lightly at her breast, making her choke and jerk away and then into his wandering touch. He hummed, obviously pleased and proceeded to torture her nipples and it felt good, of course it did but they were so sensitive and if he kept it up-

She was breathing roughly through her nose now, eyes squeezed shut as she writhed against Tony’s touch, his thrusts, Bucky’s steady hand in her hair, his faltering thrusts. He was going to come soon and if Tony’s hands just went a little low-

It would have been a shout, they both knew, if she didn’t have a mouth full of cock when in the next moment Tony was skating a hot palm against her belly and pressed two fingers roughly against her clit.

She fought against their grip then, not really trying to get away, just overcome with desire, near delirious with pleasure and when she started swallowing compulsively around Bucky’s throat, the brunet truly was done for. He warned her in nothing more than a gruffly muttered, “Gonna’ come,” And when she didn’t try and pull off, didn’t fight his grip, merely kept swallowing around his length, he let himself come.

He shouted out his release hoarsely and Tony groaned at the sight of him coming down Stevie’s no doubt raw throat, picking up the pace, fucking into her clenching core harder and faster, his fingers pressing-_pulsing-_against her clit before he was dragging them across it firm and quick.

Bucky pulled from her lips when her spine went rigid and they both watched in awe as Bucky’s cock left her mouth, his come dripping from the head and coating her bouncing breasts as she started to come.

Tony didn’t slow his teasing of her clit, kept swiping at it roughly as she cried out sharply, voice nearly unrecognizable just then. Bucky maybe was a little ashamed to admit that he didn’t feel bad about that in the slightest, nor what the sight of her tears had done to him.

Her entire body was shaking in front of him and he watched as he stroked the last few drops of his come from his cock and let it coat her belly as she arched back, thrusting her hips back to meet Tony’s thrusts, which had turned rather erratic while he’d been pleasuring her. She was whining within seconds, clearly oversensitive and although Tony would ova desperately _loved_ to have pushed her into a second orgasm, his was barrelling down on him at an alarming rate.

He grunted, releasing her and straightening up, his hands quickly grasping at her hips and tugging her back roughly onto him. She shouted hoarsely but let him move her as he wished, even going so far as to meet each and every one of his brutal thrusts. And Tony was so, _so _gone right then.

He’d barely managed half a dozen more thrusts, fucking in one last time and _grinding _into her as hard and deep as he could get, revelling in the pitiful whine and accompanying whimper that escaped her as she collapsed down onto the sofa. She was pressing her cheek against the cushions and looking over her shoulder at him in seconds, gazing up at him with heavy lidded eyes, cheeks covered in tears, mouth slick with drool and come and-and Tony was coming, never having seen a more perfect sight in his entire goddamn _life._

He groaned as he came, lashes fluttering, eyes no longer capable of staying open, despite wanting to see the mess they’d made of her. He ground weakly into her, panting roughly and hands kneading at her hips with fading urgency.

She was trembling beneath him as he rode out his orgasm and when he finally opened his eyes, he saw Bucky sprawled out on the wingback beside the sofa watching them with a sated smile and hooded eyes.

He exhaled shakily and ran soothing hands up the length of her spine, shivering and gasping himself when he hit a ticklish spot and made her jerk and clench beneath him. He let himself fall forward, catching himself so as not to put all of his weight in her. He nuzzled at the back of her neck, breathing her in as he mouthed lazily at her shoulder.

They were quiet for a long time after that, no one wanting to say anything to ruin the calm.

Tony pulled free of her with a soft apology and watched shakily as she didn’t close her legs, nor clench up. He could see his come dripping from her and he couldn’t help the choked off groan he gave at the sight.

He heard her huff softly and he glanced up the length of her body to find her smiling at him and although it was tired, it was always very pleased…and maybe a lot embarrassed.

Bucky stood up and drew both of their gazes in doing so but instead of speaking, he tipped his head towards Tony’s room and when they both nodded, he bent and carefully picked Stevie up in a bridal carry.

She exhaled a soft sigh and nuzzled against his neck as she was carried into Tony’s room and then they were being led through to the bathroom, still not a word exchanged between them.

It took only a minute for Tony to get the shower controls just how he wanted them and then he was ushering them both inside to sit on the heated bench so he could wash them. It wasn’t like they were about to complain or anything, so when Tony knelt down on the warmed tiled floor and proceeded to drag a cloth lathered with sandalwood body wash up the length of Bucky’s calf while looking up at them with a sated and fond smile, Bucky let him.

And when they both laid Stevie down on the bench to wash her together and knead at sore muscles and press kisses wherever they could reach, she let them. And after that? She watched as Bucky knelt at Tony’s feet to give him the same treatment; Tony let him.

After getting clean Bucky bundled them up in soft plush robes Tony had directed him towards and soon all three were sprawled out in Tony’s big bed, draped over one another in some way, shape or form. They were quiet, with soft breaths and steadily beating hearts, sweet kisses and gentle caresses to fill the silence.

Because they didn’t need words just then. Their touches, their kisses, the warmth of one another’s bodies passing warmth to each other, the sound of their steadily beating hearts. It all spoke for itself and if Bucky was certain of one thing and _only_ one thing, this was his chosen universe and somehow he knew that they felt just the same. Because no amount of pain and suffering would ever be too much to endure if he could have this; if he could _live this_.

To the end of the line.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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